Resisting the Potty

Sounds like my daughter. She will be 3 on April 28th and I have the same problem. If you find anything that works I would love to here about it!

K.,
Maybe the fact that you're not working right now is a perfect excuse to train her. I just did with my daughter who will be 3 on April 14th. I basically just would not give her a diaper or pull up. She used pull ups like diapers so they never helped. After 2 accidents she got upset and used the potty. Now there is no going back. It took staying home for a few days, but maybe now is the time for you if you're committed to it. Good luck. Oh, and I still put a diaper on to sleep.

My son used the potty for the first time on his 2nd birthday, but that ended the same day. We realized that he just wasn't ready. He turned 3 in June still wearing a diaper. We too wanted him potty trained for school in September, so we got a little nervous when the summer started. But he did great! In about a week he was trained. There were accidents occasionally, but by the time he started school in Sept. he was completely trained. Sometimes they just want to do things in their own time. When we pushed him, he was disinterested. When he was 3, I think he was more aware of his peers being out of diapers too. I hope this was some help.

Get rid of the pull ups completely. These just make her thinks its ok to pee and poop in them. She will sit in them because they feel just like a diaper.
Wearing her panties and having an accident has consequences and she knows that. That's why she did really good at daycare.
It will be h*** o* you but only for a week. Keep your patience. Be sympathetic to your daughter, but when she continuously has to be taken away from her play time or something she is enjoying to change her clothes it will sink in that it is easier to go to the potty.

Good Luck.
JH
Working Mother of 2 girls 9 and 7 yrs old

The worst thing you can do is pressure her to use the potty. You will be the reason she won't go, which is the opposite of what you want. Instead, make sure you are ONLY using positive reinforcement to help her learn. You can be her support and her inspiration.

1. You can start by telling her a "secret". Whisper: "Pssst, come here. I want to tell you a secret. Do you remember when you were using the potty at daycare? That made mommy feel so proud of you. Did you feel proud when you did it? Oh, good. I'm glad you were proud. You are getting to be such a big girl!" And then totally let it go and then you get really casual about it. When she goes in her diaper you change her happily and make nice comments like, "Okay, let's change that diaper... any day now my big girl isn't going to need these diapers anymore! Nope! She's such a big girl! I'm so proud of her! She's going to use the potty all the time pretty soon!..." (This is great if you tell it to her doll or favorite animal while you do it... 2 yr olds love this!) Keep all of your interactions about the potty happy, casual and with no pressure.

2. Buy a potty doll. There are several on the market. Your daughter can feed a bottle of water and then teach it to use the toy potty that it comes with. She's at the perfect age to want to be the "expert" at something. You encourage her like, "Oh, baby had a bottle? Does she have to make a pee-pee? Here's her potty! Can you show her how to go pee pee on the potty? Show baby how to use the potty!" Then you make a really big deal about how good Dolly is and give the doll lots of praise and attention. Very soon your daughter will want the same good praise and attention.

3. There is a great video called "Once Upon a Potty". They have versions for boys and for girls. It comes with a plastic potty that is just like the one in the video and the best idea is to put the potty in front of the tv so she can play with it and sit on it like the kids in the video. It is the best potty tool ever!

4. Have more than one potty and place them around the house. This is only temporary and really important. She needs to feel that she can make it to the potty on time or she won't try.

5. Accept that she is going to make a mess and never make her feel bad about it. Even if you just asked her if she had to go and she says no but has an accident. You can tell her in a firm voice that you expect her to tell you if she has to go, but don't make her feel bad about the accident. They are part of the process. Tell her each time, accident or not, that she's doing well! if she has an accident just tell her it's okay and you know next time she'll make it to the potty.

6. If you're using underwear instead of pull-ups, (a great idea, by the way) buy PLENTY and always carry at least 2 sets of extra clothes with you when you go out. Remember the infant days of carrying extra clothes in case they had a diaper "blow out"? Well... here's another time to plan for such accidents. Again, if you are in public and she has an accident again just be matter-of-fact about it. "It's okay. Accidents happen. Don't worry. I have extra clothes for you. You'll get it next time." Along with this... bring a portable potty with you wherever you go, or there are little seats you can place over the big toilets at public restrooms. Bring handiwipes to clean her hands and the potty after use and baby wipes to wipe her bottom with. And bring some pull ups for in case she has used up the extra underwear. Being well-prepared for your outings is really important.

7. Give her time. Many children are not potty trained until well into their 3s... your daughter is doing just fine for her age. She has plenty of time to get through this process by September. And- the summer months make it a lot easier to potty train while you are out of the house. You don't have all the layers and coats and things to deal with.

Good luck! Be patient and loving throughout and your daughter will sail right through this process!

Hi K.~
I told my children the store did not have anymore left. I know its untruthful but, it worked! My son was 3 and a half when he potty trained...he trained after I told him that.

My daughter is the same age, she'll be 3 April 12th.
I started potty training this summer and gave up!
We kept the potty out and she would stand on it and/or put her dolls on it but didn't want to be bothered with it herself.
About 2 mths ago she said I have to go on the potty and it's been a go since then.
She just wears a diaper at night.
When they are ready...they are ready.
Leave her alone and it will happen.

Nic

I have two little boys now 3 and 16 months. I don;t know exactly the best advice to tell u other then really keep on her. I know it sounds bad but I don't know if u ever had a puppy to potty train? My son would sometimes go and other times had no desire. It didn't matter what I did. I just kept on him about it. I think it will be a little easier for you because you are home with your daughter where I wasn't as much. Just start out maybe every 15 min or so have her go potty at least sit on it. It will be so hard at first, i know I would forget sometimes and I would pay for it when he had an accident. It will get better though, I never thought I would potty train my son. He would do so good and then all of a sudden it was like he took 10 steps back. Now he does so good. He has only had an accident if it was my fault and I didnt get him to the bathroom when he needed to go. I am not going to lie he does great during the day but night we stilll have a problem. I know its mostly my fault. He doesn't wake up and if I woke up with him and made him go it would get better. I am now pregnant again and now became a single working mother so honestly I dont want to wake him up when I hardly get sleep as it is. It is something we are working on though.I hope this helps a little.

Take a break, and just try again. My son did that for a whole year. He finally goes on his own, because I got fed up and just made him sit on the potty every so often until he went. I also used the reward system. If he would go once a day, and not have an accident, by friday he could choose either a happy meal or a dollar store shopping spree. (with a limit of course.) He enjoyed this. Prizes are fun, and it teaches them to work for something. Good luck, and remember every kid is different. She just might not be ready yet.
M.

I own and operate my daycare/preschool. I teach the children by only wearing underwear and they do get sick of peeing on them and they will use the toilet. I just trained a 2 1/2 girl and it only took her a week and a half.

If you need a daycare/preschool I own one in Pompton Lakes and we teach Preschool and Pre-K.

Visit my ____@____.com of luck.

M. S.
Director/Owner/Teacher
Little Achievers
###-###-####

PS
We are doing registration for September next week. February 4-8 9:00am-11:00am and Saturday, February 9 10:00am-12:00pm.

Try putting on underwear under the pullup. I heard that they hate the feeling of the wet underwear. I am also putting my 2 year old in nursery school in September and she will be 3 in June. Don't worry though, remember they feel your frustration.

You think they do not want to go , but it is all a control issue. She will go when she is ready you just need to back off her and encourage her to go on the pooty after each meal and remind her during the day. I have been struggling with my son and he is 4. My 2 1/2 year old get excited when we sing and dance when she goes on the potty, we also have a special treat just for when they do go on the pottty. (lifesavers and Fish) Hope this helps :)

boy oh boy do i relate to your problem. i have a 4 year old who is as stuborn as they come! we started putting him in underpants and setting a timer for every twenty to twenty five minutes. he would have to sit on the potty untill he goes or once again set the timer for a few minutes. if he does go he gets a prize- candy, lolipop, something special he doesnt normaly get. this has worked so far, now he will go in the bathroom by himself. small steps, but steps. good luck with daughter.

I didn't fight with my daughter - she would go pee pee on the potty but never poop. I knew that she would go behind the furniture and squat to poop - so I kept her by my side the whole day and whenever she tried to squat I would get her to the bathroom - she refused to go - but sooner or later it had to come out - so I got her to the potty - she pooped and never used a diaper again. She was trained through the night before during the day - anyway - that's how I got her to go - good luck to you - every child is different!!!!

Hi-I have five daughters. The first four did not potty train until they turned three. I read books, studied stretegies and tried to be consistent. The truth is this: kids will train when they are ready. If you get frustrated, you'll make your daughter and yourself frustrated. My pediatrician gave me a bit of humorous advice, "Don't worry, she'll be potty trained by the time she goes to college." Well, he was right. Hang in there ... this too shall pass!

I'm a mom of 5. Ages are 7,5,4,2 and 6 months. I've noticed that with my children around 3 1/2 is when they started comprehending going to the bathroom. I went straight to underwear from the diapers. For nap times and bedtimes I'd put them in their diapers. During the day time I tried to get them to the bathroom about every hour so they got into a routine. When it came to them not wanting to poop in the potty or in their underwear I'd put a diaper on them. Reward your child when she does go to the bathroom on her own (we did lots of claps :) ) As long as you are consistant in your efforts with her she'll catch on. In the beginning you're going to have quite a few wet underwear but it will end I promise :) I'd check with the pre-school to find out if they would take her if she is potty training. Good luck with your new job and I hope everything works out for you :)

Talk to the day care teachers, what ever they did worked! also you may have to set the kitchen timer for every 15 minutes and ask her each time it rings if she has to go. Once an hour make her try.You're home right now, thank God, so you have the time to work this out. It may be a reaction to the life changes too, a small regression. Take it in stride keep trying!! Its frustrating I know , but so worth the effort!!
Tell every body what a big girl she is and how well she is doing set up the expectation for success. Make up stories and talk to her baby sister or her dollies about how one uses the potty and when you know you gotta go , go!! sitting in pee pee pants doesn't feel good. big girls go potty. Good luck K.. Don't get too discouraged,nobody ever graduated from high school in pull ups!

stop trying she's not ready, you're just going to upset you both....try again in the summer...put her in shorts with no underwear or a skirt with nothing underneath...play outside...trust me the first time she gets it all over her....she'll care...word to the wise...don't tell her you need her trained to go to school....if she's nervous about school, she won't let you train her. also there are schools out there that you don't have to be trained for and lastly I promise when she's ready...it'll click and take a lot less time and energy.

You have prenty of time before she has to go to school. She may still be too young. Let her initiate going to the potty. If you push her into it, she'll go backwards. Besides, the Summer time is the best time to potty train. Until then you can encourage her, but don't push her. She'll do it on her own time.

Hi K.,
I completely understand, we are working on potty training our 2 year old. What I have done that seems to be working, is to let him run around the house diaper-free whenever we are home, making sure he knows where the potty is. He does make a few accidents, and when he does, we tell him in a calm and encouraging way, that when he needs to go pee/poop to do so in the potty. Letting him go diaper-free is an important step in potty training because he can see and experience what its like. The pro & con about disposables is that they work so well, but the child does not get to experience the wetness or what actual happens with their body.

After a few accidents, he does walk over to the potty and go by himself. We then cheer, do a "potty" dance and he gets a special sticker. I never force him on the potty when he refuses but i think being consistent is key.

I hope this helps. Good Luck :)
N.