Reasonable Pick up Time for a Sleepover

Updated on November 03, 2014
R.S. asks from Lone Tree, CO
27 answers

So, if no time is specified, what time do you think is reasonable to pick up your kids if they are staying overnight.

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So What Happened?

Thanks for the feedback. I think between 10 and 12 is generally reasonable but I always ask. My daughter is young, so this is a new thing for me that that timeframe seemed reasonable so that the family can move on with their weekend. I just watched a friends son overnight and they said they would pick him up early, so I was thinking 10 or 11 at the latest, it turned into 2pm. I feel like this is slightly my fault as maybe I should have specified what time would work for me. I didn't have anything in particular planned but I just feel like my style is cramped a little with an extra kid around. Obviously, I don't mind having kids over but it just feels like too long.

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M.T.

answers from New York on

Late morning. Before noon. A sleepover would typically involve breakfast, but the hosting parents should not be expected to provide lunch or entertain the kids for the day.

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C.N.

answers from Pittsburgh on

We always do a big brunch the next morning of sleepovers. So I always tell the parents between 12 & 1. But if my kids go, I always ask, or text in the morning.

5 moms found this helpful

V.S.

answers from Reading on

A friend just told me her kids are still at their sleepover from last night (about 3pm) and all I could think was "how rude!"

3 moms found this helpful

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I always told the parents beforehand that pickup was 10am.

Most sleepovers our daughters attended had the same routine. 10am

However, we've had many kids at our house for over 24 hours and it was a good thing. It depends on the friends, transportation, and if everyone is having a great time and getting along!

I miss those days now;(. Enjoy while you can

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M.R.

answers from Washington DC on

Always ask before the sleepover or at least when you drop off your child!

Don't make assumptions based on what others say here. I would hate to assume a late pickup like noon, and arrive to find my kid is the last guest left and the family is anxious to get out the door to do other things that day. Or it would be a time-waster to go too early and find everyone's still in pajamas and the parents are barely awake themselves. Ask!

I know that noon is way late for a sleepover to end around here. Most sleepovers among my daughter's friends are Saturdays and many families have church the next day or other things they need to do as a family before school on Mondays.

4 moms found this helpful

C.V.

answers from Columbia on

If not time is specified, or the hosting family forgets to mention it, I ask them when I drop off the kids. It may be that they have planned breakfast as a part of the fun, so it's important to know.

If your kids were spending the night at my home, I'd let you know when to pick them up during dropoff.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Well if a time wasn't specified I would ASK what time they want you to pick your kid up. Some people prefer to let the kids (and themselves) sleep in and some want them up and out early, it depends on the family.
(And no one ever had to ask me, I always made pick up time very clear, usually sometime between 10 and noon.)

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E.B.

answers from Beaumont on

I always asked but they were nice and said "anytime". I'd say around 11.

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R.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I would ask, but usually 10ish?

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

My kids friends had to be picked up or I dropped off usually by 10:00 at the latest. We always had multiple sports on Saturdays. And I didn't want to mess with extra kids all day long lol.

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O.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

What I do is text around 9:30 or 10:00 and ask.

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S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

Noon. When our kids have sleepovers they stay up really late and sleep late. When they get up I make them a big breakfast and they play for a while. Everyone is generally dressed and ready to go by noon. We do often plan an all day activity around sleepovers, and drop them off when we are done.

ETA: I wouldn't let my kids go on a sleepover if I had to pick my kid up anytime before 10am! That would ruin my weekend!

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I also thought 10 AM. I would clarify how early is too early if you didn't get a timeframe.

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G.D.

answers from Detroit on

I usually host sleepovers. These kids have been my kids friends for years and their parents went to HS with me/or dad. I usually tell them 2-3pm. The kids usually sleep in, I make em a good breakfast and light lunch and they play. One girl will come to church wit us if she spends Sat night.
When my kids go to someone else's house I always ask/tell the host and parent what time I need to pick up (if they have soccer games and such the next day).
I think 10 am is a little early if they dont have activities the next day. Doesn't give em much time to play the next day.

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

Usually 9 or 10, but for the girls that were on soccer teams, or other activities, they were picked up earlier than the other girls.

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W.W.

answers from Washington DC on

R.,

When my kids were younger - like under 10? I would say pick up before lunch.

Now that they are older? I don't have a set time. We picked up a friend yesterday evening (he now lives 30 miles away since his mom bought a home in Haymarket). He just left about an hour ago - and that was almost 24 hours he was here.

It all depends on WHO they are with and what is on the calendar for the day.
I'm okay with their friends staying during the day too...my kids hang around a bunch of great kids...so it's great to hear a lot of laughter in the house... or outside on the street!!

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C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Most of the sleepovers my kids have been to lately have had a pickup time of 10am.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Another vote for 10am, but I usually ask at drop-off in case it needs to be earlier. After having kids at my house all night, I'm usually ready for them to leave by 10am!!

I agree with Veruca Salt- 3pm? How rude!

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S.H.

answers from Santa Barbara on

I ask the host what works for them. If they say 'anytime' then I offer the early time. Some friends (the parents) ask if my child (children) can stay longer because the kids are having a great time.

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T.F.

answers from Washington DC on

When I was younger the time was all Noon, but I see a lot of people in the comments saying 10 so times may have changed. If your kid has a cell phone maybe ask them to call you in the morning when they wake up and play it by ear?

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Depends on the connection to the family. If they're good friends and like to spend time together all the time then they're sort of like family and can stay all day. If they're just an acquaintance invited over for a party then I'd simply ask the mom what time pick up is.

I tend to not allow the kids to go to sleep overs of people I don't know though. If I am not friends with that family then how am I supposed to know what goes on in that house? Do they drink all the time? Smoke pot? Cuss each other out all night? Watch rated R movies on the main TV in the family room? Do they hit their kids and expect to do that to anyone who doesn't mind instantly? What are their morals and standards?

So I wouldn't have this issue because I'd be talking to the parents and getting to know them before I let the kids go over.

When we've had sleep overs the kids stayed up all hours and were still asleep when some of the parents came to get their kids. I wouldn't want to deal with that so I'd call first to let them know I was coming.

One time we had a sleep over and I told the parents we were leaving at 9:30 to go to a parade that next morning and they'd need to pick their kids up by 9am because they wouldn't all fit into our car. I got rid of most of them on time.

The 2 parents who didn't pick up on time had to come downtown to find their kids. One was apologetic and the other was pissed that I took her child in my car and drove her somewhere. So sorry, NOT. Gave them a pick up time and my plans were specific and unchangeable. Life sucked being her but it was her fault and not mine, I gave fair warning.

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M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

My 11 year old slept out on Friday night and pickup was 11am, the mom apologized over and over that it was so early! Normally she keeps them much later (and she has all 13 girls from this one group over)....but 11 was perfect for me.

She then had a school friend stay the night on Saturday. She came over at 3 and was picked up at 3 on Sunday. Honestly, I told her mom whenever, and I meant it. I was a little surprised she went home at 3 and not later. We love this kid though, and it's like we don't actually have a guest when she is over - so it's easy on us.

If my boys had friends sleep over, I think I would go for between 11 and 12, that way we can sleep in and I can feed everyone a good breakfast before going home.

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

We don't do too many sleep overs, but for starters, I would ask what time to pick up. If they have something to do, it should come up at that time.

Next, it depends on the relationship and distance.

My daughter stays at her godmother's house. They live about 30 miles away. They don't see each other often enough and since there is a strong relationship, it doesn't matter so much.

Some people have rules and some have none.

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D.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Agree with you - I always pick up around 10 or 11. And if it's at my house, I arrange pickup around that time.

My point of view is - the kids always stay up late and don't get much sleep. No matter how much they love to play together, they need some down time they day after the excitement of a sleepover.

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W.X.

answers from Boston on

I am with TF/Plano. I miss those days.

However, it was about 11. Time to eat breakfast and then play, but not to stay for lunch.

1 mom found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

When they do an over night lock in parents night out at taekwondo, the kids are dropped off at 8pm and picked up at 7am.
When we did this we picked up our son and went out to breakfast before bringing him home - then he'd catch up on sleep at home.

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T.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

My daughter is having her first sleep over on the 21sth for her birthday. I told the parents to pick them up by noon. I promised a pancake breakfast so I don't know if I will be finished in time for an earlier pickup.

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