Pre-school Dilemma

Dear L.,

My daughter, who is now 4 1/2, started preschool when she was two. Before that we did Gymboree. Putting her in preschool was the best decision my husband and I ever made. She really needed the socialization since she is an only child, and I needed a bit of a break.

I learned from our Gymboree experience that it appears the children are not paying attention and just goofing around, but what is being taught is actually going in. It rattles around for awhile then comes back out when you least expect it. The instructors at Gymboree told me that it would seem a child spends all of the class staring out the window, but when they got home they would "perform the whole class." So your son will get something out of his preschool experience, even if it seems he's just playing with "different" toys. At the least it will help you learn to seperate from each other.

One woman told me a story that she didn't want to put her son in preschool because she wanted to spend all the time with him. By the time he was four he was begging to go to preschool so he could be with other kids. I thought is was rather selfish of her to try to keep her son all to herself.

Since his birthday is in November, you might want to wait until this fall for him to start preschool. Of course, the preschool registrations for next fall will start in February (it does at my daughter's school). The teachers will appreciate that he is a bit older when he starts, and he'll be even more ready for school. I recommend three days a week. The children get used to it faster than just two days a week.

Hope this helps!

Go for it! My daughter is now 26 months, but I enrolled her in a two-day-a-week preschool program when she was 20 months. I was more nervous about it than she ever was. It has been great! Her speach and social skills have greatly improved and she loves 'cool' (what school sounds like when she says it)!

I am also a military spouse and have lived in Va Beach for 7 years. If you have any questions, I'm here :-)

Preschool is a great idea. I am a pediatric Occupational therapist by profession and we highly recommend "time away from mommy" when possible. I don't think it is as much the question of whether or not old enough to learn, but rather the "goal" at 2 is for socialization and successful separation. Even Mother's Day Out is a great idea. It is important for both of you to have time apart. Not to mention a great way to meet moms!

We also live inthe Virginia Beach area if you have other questions.

I knew I would want my child in a more structured setting at about 18 mo but he didn't go until he was 2. I can see a big difference in his language development and I really want him to learn to share. We still have a LONG way to go but I am very happy with him being in a preschool setting.

Good luck!

I put my 3yr. old in preschool and regret it. We are military and I did it as a way for him to meet other kids his age and give me a break. I put him in a "good preschool" two mornings a week. The only thing I can say for sure that he has learned is how to stand in line. He is in no way ahead of other kids who stay at home. He does bring home ideas for things I should be doing more of.

If you are worried about not having time apart the libraries have storytime where mom must wait outside, there are programs at the YMCA, Parks & Rec programs, etc...

At two kids need their mommy. At that age Preschool is just another way of saying daycare.

I enrolled my just-turned 2 year old in preschool last fall and it did not work out. We were asked to leave because he was too active and immature for the school's structure. He loved the activities and we thought he was doing well, but as it turns out they expected much more than he could handle at his age. I think preschool can be a fantastic thing, but I would make sure that it is the right fit for your child. Ask lots of questions about their expectations and make sure that the setting is appropriate for your child's level of maturity. You also might consider a Mom's Day Out style school that has less structure and more supervised playtime. No one knows your child more than you do. I would just make sure that the setting you choose is a good fit. Good luck!