C.T. asks from Carmichael, CA on April 18, 2008
Potty Training Twins - Carmichael,CA
I have 2 1/2 year old twin daughters. Suddenly, after 3 months of the "potty seat" being a cobweb-gathering fixture in the bathroom, one of my daughters woke up one morning & announced "I have to use the potty". Aside from a VERY infrequent accident, she has completely potty trained herself (except for during the night). Her sister on the other hand will occasionally humor me by sitting on the potty, but would be just as happy not to be bothered by such things. How should I handle the different attitudes from my girls? One daughter is so excited by the prospect of wearing "big girl underpants" beginning this Sunday & all the begging, praising and yes bribing the other doesn't seem to have an effect!
K.B. answers from Sacramento on April 19, 2008
First I would warn you to be very careful not to compare the two or expect either one of them to do somehting just because the other is. They are completely different people and personalities even they they were born together. The last thing you want to do is give your daughter a "why can't you be more like your sister" or " but your sister can do it" complex. I am a younger sister and trust me that will follow her throughout her entie life!! If she's not interested - then don't worry about it. She's obvisouly seeing her sister doing it and I'm sure she knows and understands "how" to do it if she wans to. Children learn in different ways and in different times. For many of them, the more you push, the more they resist and vice versa. I spent a few days showing my daughter what to do - she knew how - but didn't really want to, especially if I wanted her to. So I just left her alone, told her that she didn't have to and went about our lives. A few months later, she woke up one morning, asked to put underwear on and has been potty trained ever since. In the mean-time, try to find other things that you can praise her about and be proud of her for. They all get the potty training eventually - I wouldn't worry about it. Her self esteem is MUCH more important that weather or not she is in diapers or undies. Trust me, she'll get there eventually on her own. Just be a patient, loving mama as I'm sure you are!!
M.E. answers from Sacramento on April 19, 2008
I have 4 y/o twin boys, who are as I describe them, the opposite side of one coin-i.e. they are completely different, yet complete each other.
You have to just pretend they are not twins on stuff like this. I cannot imagine you would be concerned if your 2 1/2 y/o singleton was not intersted in potty training yet, so it just is what it is, and the 2nd one will get there when she is ready.
K.M. answers from Sacramento on April 19, 2008
How to handle it? Don't sweat it. My twins were several months apart with everything from sitting up, to walking, to potty training. It may help however, to let the slow trainer see you praising the other twin for: dry pants, using the big girl potty, being such a big girl...all positive reinforcement for the RIGHT behavior. Of course when the slow trainer starts doing it right, be sure to give her the same good reinforcement! Good luck!
W.W. answers from Sacramento on April 19, 2008
Everybody is different. Even twins. As you can tell from one daughter "When they get, they really get it." No amount of training/bribing/crying, etc will make it go any faster. Take comfort in knowing that she will not get married in diapers! Good luck and take heart.