B.M. asks from Yukon, OK on February 23, 2010
S.H. answers from Honolulu on February 23, 2010
How old is your daughter?
Next, depending on how old, kids are often not yet able, nor have the coordination/dexterity to pull down their own pants/pull-ups/underwear. So you need to help them.
Even 3 year olds need help or with even basic dressing/undressing themselves.
Potty training occurs in stages and is a process. It also has to do with the myelin development of the nerves.
Keep in mind, that dryness during night-time and naps is a WHOLE SEPARATE process & ability.. and will not occur yet. Night-time dryness... can even take until 7 years old, which is normal. And accidents may still occur. And per our Pediatrician.
One step at a time.
For night-time... once she is actually at that stage, a waterproof bed-pad is very good to have... put it right under her, and it makes clean up much easier. I have about 4 that I change out and launder as needed, if my kids wet the bed at night or during naps.
Also useful, is a car potty. For times you are in a car and there is no bathroom in sight or the child cannot hold it or wait until you reach your destination. On www.amazon.com just put in the search words "on the go potty". The car potty, has been a literal life saver for us and our kids. Our friends have these car potty's too. Very useful.
Potty training is in 3-4 stages:
1) daytime peeing "mastery" and in the toilet, being able to tell you and pull down their own pants.
2) pooping in toilet and mastery of it.
3) night-time/nap time dryness.
Also, their ability to "hold" it until they reach the bathroom and them telling you before they have to go pee/poop. AND their gradual ability to actually wipe themselves... which will take until she gets much older.
These stages do NOT occur at the same time, nor should be expected to occur at the same time.
Potty training takes time to completely "master" it for the child, and it will take longer if the child is not ready.
Also, regression or mistakes and accidents WILL happen. Which is completely normal.
Well sorry for rambling and the extra suggestions.
But yes, pooping in the toilet, is usually something a child will do, in time. Not right away. Or they will, then won't. Main thing is, don't pressure them or they will get constipated, or "withhold" their poop, even if they have to go. My daughter, even if we did not pressure her, got constipated. We had to see a Pediatric Gastroenterologist and he said, potty training toddlers often go through this... but constipation is difficult to remedy, since going poop, while constipated and if the child withholds it, it will hurt. Creating a vicious cycle. He recommends, just waiting until the child is ready and comfortable to poop in a toilet. That day will come, maybe just not yet. Nothing wrong, with pooping in a diaper if that is only where she will go, right now. In time, she will go on a toilet. Better to let her go there, than to have her constipated and it being a battle. Lots of kids, will not yet, poop in a toilet right away.
All the best,
3 moms found this helpful
A.A. answers from Tulsa on February 24, 2010
try reverse psychology...tell you no you dont know how to poop in the potty i dont think you can do it and she will want to prove to you that she can...it worked with my son and its worth a shot hope this helps!
P.M. answers from Portland on February 23, 2010
S H. has given you good advice. Pooping comes later; it's a whole separate stage. Don't push it before she's ready, or you could complicate the process and have real problems (attitudinal, and possibly medical) to undo later.
J.V. answers from Chicago on February 24, 2010
My daughter was the same way for a few months. I bought the book "everybody poops." After reading it to her for a week, I then told her she could wear any undies she wanted after she put her poop in the potty. She picked Elmo, and I also told her she could have Dora fruit snacks (She'd only ever had fruit snacks at a party once). The next week, we were done. She even went to undies at night two weeks later.
I also think it's important to take off their dirty undies in the bathroom, with them standing up. The less associations you have with changing tables the better. When I would remove my daughter's pants, I would ask her where poop goes, and then we'd flush it down the toilet. I would then tell her that "tomorrow, you will do it. You will get your poop in the toilet. I know it!" I think encouragement and believing in them is essential to giving them the confidence to give it a go themselves.
One other thing I did was talk to her about it. When I would see that she was gassy, I'd ask her if she felt pressure, and if she needed to go. I would watch her like a hawk around when I thought she needed to go, and then I would rush her to the potty. After doing that a few times, and after spending a few days talking to her about it, I asked her one morning if she wanted to try to go on the potty. She was a bit anxious about it, but she willingly gave it a go, and she did it. She was so proud of herself! She then started telling me she wanted to try.
B.S. answers from Enid on February 25, 2010
How old is your daughter? She just might not quite where you want her to be, kids usually train themselves when they are ready, Mom's and Dad's rush them sometimes. Let her in the bathroom with you Mom and reinforce the idea that it is good for her to go. You need to think on her level, is there somereason she doesn't want to, might ask her how she feels about it? See just what she is thinking, and why she doesn't think it is ok. May God bless and keep you and yours.