Potty Training 3.5 Yr Old

Our neighbor's son was EXACTLY the same. It was hilarious looking outside last summer (he was 3.5 too) and seeing him pushing his Tonka truck in a shirt and sandles - nothing else. We all got to know Gabe quite well.

He had the same issue as your son - he would wet himself everytime he had on a pair of underwear but could hold it. It was simply a matter of him being able to recognize when he needed to go to the bathroom (bladder fullness).

I'd not recommend Pull-ups. I'd just be OK with him running around naked when appropriate. We have 20 kids on our street, 5 of which are the same age, so none of us were bothered by seeing this kid running around 1/2 naked. The best advice our pediatrician gave us with both kids (son soon to be 4 and daughter just turned 2) is to let them dictate when they're ready based upon physical cues. If not, they'll likely have issues with regression down the road.

Many people have successfully potty-trained their kids much earlier. Our nephew is 3.5 and had to do it on his terms - it became a battle of the wills. Once he decided he was ready a few weeks ago, it was no holds barred.

I am also working on potty training my 3.5 year old boy. He seems to have the same issues as your son. He will only go potty if we leave him naked. The minute we put on a pullup/training pants/underwear, he will wet them. I'm a very big believer in not pushing and just waiting for them to figure it out. Just today my son started telling me he needs to pee and I help him take his diaper off and he goes. He's been dry so far all day. So it sounds like your son is just at the edge of being ready as well. He goes sometimes and other times he forgets? I'll bet you pretty soon he is just going to remember every time. I would definitely remind him once in awhile, especially if he is doing an activity he seems really focused on... cause that's when he's likely to forget to go! Just take it one day at a time, he does sound really close to being ready.

My kids were all trained with treats. My oldest were sons and they watched me go pee in the toilet. My wife praised me for making bubbles and showed our son I got M&M's for making bubbles. He learned real quick and when it came time for our next son to learn it happened all over again. Some of my grandkids are in the potty training stage. Some of my kids use treats and some don't. When Grandpa babysits he hates changing diapers and they know they will get treats when going potty at Grandpa and Grandma's home. I seldom have to change diapers. They have far, far fewer accidents here than at home.

On more than one occasion one of my grandkids has told their mom in that plaintive, whiney voice, "I don't want to go to potty." I remind them that they are at Grandpa's house and they get a special treat from the special treat jar when they go potty. They smile and off they go and go potty. Then they get their reward. I stock the special treat jar with fruit rollups as well as candy. The fruit is the most popular item. Its all part of what I learned in Psych 1A when I went to college several decades ago. Remember Pavlov's dog? It works.

My son is 3.5
only recently he has been, on his own, "ready" to potty train.
He goes on the potty chair. Not yet a toilet.
We had him initially naked. Then now he wears underwear, the Gerber Training Pants or the Potty Scotty underwear, both of which is padded in the middle.
My son does know when/if he has to go potty. But he can't hold it for very long. We keep the potty chair near him wherever he is. He goes on it himself. He does still need help with pulling down and pulling up his underwear. Which is normal.

Yes, its a learning curve. Each child is different. Some just don't know their cues yet, nor have it defined nor perfect. Give him time. But yes, you need to occasionally 'remind' them. They are still young to be totally self-sufficient at it.

Don't use pull-ups, they are useless and expensive.

My son is not yet ready, to be in just underwear when we are out.. he can't hold it that long. So when out he is in a diaper. He knows its just for going out. Also for his naps and bedtime, he is in a diaper. He is not dry yet for naps or bedtime. Which is normal.

Keep in mind, that for night time, "night dryness" is something that is not attained until even 7 years old. Night time "dryness" is a WHOLE other thing, SEPARATE from day-time toileting. Because it is BIOLOGICAL based and their bladder/nerve/brain connections. Even my 7 year old, still once in a blue moon, will have a pee accident at night. Its no biggie. Normal per Pediatricians and my daughter's Teachers.

10 days of trying is not much. Maybe for you its a long time, but not for a kid. Your boy still pees in his underwear... he is not yet "mastered" at it or controlling his bladder, nor differentiation of it per naked or having something on him. Learning curve.

And yes, even OLDER kids sometimes 'forget' to go pee, because they are playing. MANY kids do that. They "think" they can hold it. Their mind and body assumptions are not on target yet.

He will accomplish it. Don't worry. But he will do it on his timeline, not yours. And just calmly 'remind' him to pee...
I would, keep him naked... since he can do that well. Then now with his underwear on, just realize that it will take him time to get used to that.... it is 2 different things.

Just make sure you encourage him to trying "his best"... not it being "perfect." Otherwise, there is no good feelings about it, for the child. If he makes an accident, then no biggie. Just know that he is trying his best... he is still learning. Praise him.

I don't give 'rewards/treats' for potty perfection. Otherwise a kid just expects a treat everytime. I just praise my boy. He gets proud and gives me a high-five.

Don't worry.... he will get it. Boys are often later with pottying.

all the best,
Susan

I wonder if a cloth diaper would work, or maybe better would be some of those "training pants" that are like underwear but with extra padding to absorb the pee when they forget? That way he has a physical reminder that he is going (unlike a disposable diaper that just wicks it all away immediately) and might catch on to the getting wet and the feeling of needing to pee just before he does. Good luck! I'm sure he'll catch on eventually and you're doing the right thing but not making a big deal of it!

I dont think you have to be butt naked to potty train. we trained my son in 3 days in thick cotton training pants.. he didnt like the wet undies and quickly got it.

My son also showed zero signs of readiness.. he was 2 years 10 months and did not have any interest in the potty.. he would pee on command before bath. but that is it..so I put him in cotton training pants and told him not to pee.. he had many accidents for 3 days and then was dry.

I have 2 kids and only took time to tell him to go potty for the first couple of days.. I actually didnt even tell him to go that much the first days.. but he wet himself and learned quickly..

at 3.5 years.. he could be motivated by rewards... or motivated by punishment.. if you think he is physically ready to train put the boy in undies and change them as needed. try a reward... he can go buy toy if he stays dry for X period of time or a punishment.. time out if he is wet..

my friends son was potty trained in a couple of days (age 4) when they said that he could nt go to the farm to visit his horse if he was not using the potty.. again these methods do not work with a young 2 year old but can be very effectiive in an older stubborn or lazy child.

Go to One Step Ahead's website, they sell a "potty watch" that you can set for whatever time interval you want, it will be his reminder--and fun for him to get to wear. I have a friend with boys who used it and liked it! It's about $10 =-)