PLEASE Help My Daughter Go to Sleep!

If she is still fighting her ear infection all you can do is ride it out and contact the doc. again.

Assuming that she is healthy, I would like to suggest a couple of things--no more naps or reduce them to one, as difficult as that may be for you--even if she falls as sleep in her steps. Wake her up and keep going. The theory being that she will be so tired she won't be able to cry.

Next increase her exercise. More outdoor walks, maybe swimming lessons if you can find them. Make her tired so she can't cry and needs to sleep more than cry.

Get one of those machine that make oceans or forest sounds for her to fall asleep with.

Get her a blanky if she doesn't have one. Develop a routine and stick to it every evening no matter what.

If this sounds simple and abrupt it is not meant to be that way. I hope it helps you. Remember, everything passes.

She may have pain from the ear infection use 1/2 rubbing alcohol and 1/2 vinegar, use a dropper or one of those baby nose suction devices to get it down in there.( any vinegar will do rice ,apple cider )
Please use good warm hats that cover the ears in this damp weather we have up here.
I'd go ahead and keep her close as she needs until she feels better...this to will pass

She really doesnt feel good and when babies (even kids) dont feel good they want mommy. They dont care what time it is or that it is right for them to sleep in their own bed. My daughter goes through this as well, currently actaully. She is 4. She is having some tummy issues and just doesnt feel good. Someone reminded me the other day that when they dont feel good they want mommy. So when I put her to bed instead of trying to reason with her that it was bed time(thinking to my self, just go to bed...) I stayed a few extra minutes and rubbed her head and snuggled a little longer than usual.
Its alright to vary from the ROUTINE a little when they are sick, just make sure you dont go too far the other way and make sure to move back towards the norm. She most likely will bounce right back into being the perfect sleeper she was before. She just doesnt feel good and that can be scary for a little one. I hope you get some sleep soon. If she is truely sick, dont let her cry it out, she needs to be comforted.

Well I agree with most of what I read below: you have answered your own question! I don't know if you remember the last time YOU had an ear infection, but even after the antibiotics start working the fluid in the ears takes a while to go away (even longer in young children, because of their anatomy)and laying down can be really uncomfortable, at times even nauseating.

In our house, when someone (anyone, including myself or DH)is sick, normal rules don't apply. We will simply do what it takes to make the "patient" feel better. That may mean gong to bed late, early, sleeping in, allowing otherwise "banned" food, sleeping on the couch, in our bed - whatever it takes... It's just a couple of days anyways and we all feel better not making a big fuss about certain things, just because they are our routine...

S. - I am along with the other mom's that she has an ear infection so doesn't feel well. My son's both have slept in their beds FOREVER, but if they are sick I bring them to my bed. That way I can cuddle throughout the night, or if they are barfing help them threw that as well.
I would say to stop trying to get her to sleep in her room, at least for the next week. If you keep putting her down and then letting her cry for some time and then going to get her, she is learning to cry so you pick her up. She is sick, tell her, "mommy knows that your ears have been hurting you, would you like to sleep with me tonigh? As soon as you feel all better, back to your comfy bed you go!" That way she knows that she is in bed with you because she is sick, and then when she is feeling better, back to her own bed.
I am also with the mom that said to get the numbing drops. Both of my boys had ear infections (one in two ears, and the other in one ear) at the same time! ugh. The drops definitely helped them.
Good Luck, L.
By the way, I definitely believe in cry it out, don't get me wrong. But, she is sick, so I also know that extra cuddles from you will help her sleep better AND you!

Hi,

I hate ear infections. Unfortunately you will have to ride it out. It takes about 3 days before the antibiotic works. Lying down flat hurts like heck. All the fluid and pressure is very painful that is why they don't want to lie down and just want your comfort to be held. Their are organic ear drops that help immediate pain. She will be better soon. It takes awhile.

Polly
mom to a 6, 5, and 21 month girls

Hi S.,
You may just have to lose some sleep until her ears let up.. Did you ask the doc about some homeopathic ear drops to help with the fluid build-up..I wouldn't let her CIO anymore,, sounds like it is because she doesn't feel well... and the trust issues it can cause..Hope those abx start working.
L

Gosh, if I had any more suggestions, I'd use them myself. Our son (25 mos) will actually go to sleep in his own bed, but ALWAYS seems to find his way stealthily back to ours. We did have him sleeping in his own bed almost all night a few months ago, then he got very sick with an upper respiratory infection and needed to be elevated while sleeping and I didn't like the way he sounded when he was breathing. I couldn't elevate the base of his bed high enough, safely enough and he refused to sleep in his carseat, so he wound up coming to bed with us and our zillion pillows. We made sure to shower with him (the steam helped him open up a bit) before going to bed and used children's vapor rub... there's a cherry kind... on him and regular vicks on one or both of us so he was surrounded with vapors. I didn't get any sleep because I wanted to keep an eye on him to make sure he stayed on top of the pillows or one of our chests. He's better now, but still climbs in bed with us nightly.

I actually tried to stay up all night recently because I kept making sure I put him back in his own bed whenever he got into ours... yeah right! I'm not doing that again. Our situation is complicated by the fact that his room is in our room. We have a room devider up between our space and his and he has his toddler bed, his own dresser and toys set up with a play area, but we don't have enough rooms in the house for him to have his own room and there's not enough space in our boys' room for his bed to fit too.

He is my fourth child and the rest of them do sleep in their own beds except for the occasional living room camp out. I know that there is an end to the every night routine, but I just don't know how long it will take. All I can say is stick with it. I know the every night thing will end for you too. My friend has a pre-teen who still finds her way into their bed when she's having a rough night. My oldest son (13) sometimes crawls in bed with me to cuddle when there's something on his mind and he can't sleep late at night and my middle son (9) asks for me to lay down with him until he falls asleep sometimes. He's afraid of the dark and won't even walk up the stairs unless there is someone else upstairs AND there are lots of lights on. (Do you have a night light in your daughter's room?) My daughter (12) seems to be the only one who stays by herself all night, but sometimes I'll wake up to her staring at me... it's a bit unnerving, but she always asks me if I was sleeping or tell me she's sorry she woke me. This is usually the window of opportunity to find out what's on her mind. They also do this whenever they are not feeling well.

I guess my point is that it will never end until they grow up and move away... then you'll wake to the occasional middle of the night phone call when they can't sleep or there is something going on in their lives. I am trying to see it as a blessing that my kids know that I'm here for them day and night... I miss my sleep, though. I REALLY miss my sleep. I'm hoping that this summer I can get my DS to sleep in his own bed most of the time before I have to go back to work in August/September because I'll be useless to an employer and I won't be very friendly, I'm afraid, if he doesn't... LOL. I keep trying to remember "This too shall pass." It seems to be my motto these days.

Good luck. You are not alone!!

It is possible she is hurting more laying flat, it is also possible she associates the crib with the ear infection. My oldest daughter, now 36 had ear issues very serious several times in childhood, we put a wedge under her crib mattress at one end just slightly to elevate the infected ear. It may be time for a todler bed conversion. Good luck! K. Dukes also known as Grandma K..

My Daughter Emma is now 3 and she has had a ton of ear infections so I understand. My guess is that the medicine she is on isn't working. There was one time that Emma was 1 and she had 4 different medicine in like a 40 day period because they were not stopping the infection.

The other thing is try putting phone books or something under one end of the crib to elevate her head. When they lay down they feel there ears and the discomfort more. I might also try giving her Tylenol and then after 4 hours Motrin. This is what the doctor told us to do and only start maybe 4 hours before she goes to bed since she seems fine during the day.

Emma just had an ear infection about 3 weeks ago and the doctor gave her numbing ear drops that I can put in right before bed and then I put cotton in her ear and to bed she went we only did this for 4 nights but she went right to sleep. The first time we took her into the doctor he gave her one type of medicines and then 3 weeks later we were back because it didn't clear it up and she had to get a stronger medicine. I hope this helps give you some ideas of what to do and good luck.
E.

She's not feeling well, she wants the closeness of her parents, she's still a 'baby' and not capable of telling you all that is troubling or hurting her, she doesn't have the command of the language to do that yet. Ear infections hurt. A warm compress or hot water bottle under her head might provide relief. You may have to spend a few nights on the floor with blankets and a pillow to comfort her in her room if you don't want her in your bed. That and at her age, separation anxiety comes into play. Toddlers are more aware of your comings and goings, and they sense the loss, not being able to control their environment easily, so they cry and cling to keep you with them. You're going to have to build the trust and dependability with her. Having her play in a room without you in it for 10 minutes, then increasing that time in 5 minute increments. Leaving her with a sitter while you go shopping for 30 minutes and increasing that time span incrementally, so she can see you come back when you say you will. This is life. As much as you couldn't leave her when she was an infant, keeping an eye on her all the time, not wanting her out of your sight, she's the same way with you.

You've actually answered your own question...she had an ear infection, she falls asleep on and incline, she wakes up in screaming pain if she's laid flat.

It can actually take several weeks for all the fluids in her ears and to dissipate. The canals aren't fully formed like ours, but even with ours ever notice how much stuffier you get as soon as you lay down? The fluid drains down the back of your throat when you're standing/sitting but it has nowhere to go when you're lieing flat. It's WAY WAY worse for babies and toddlers...because 1) they're not done growing, 2)they usually don't have pillows which at least give us an inch or two of incline, 3)They don't really know how to swallow the post nasal drip and it can end up causing a gag reflex 4) They can't clear their ears. All this put together means that young children's ear drums frequently burst from the pressure...and a lot of the time it happens "after" the ear infection is "over". Your daughter is crying because she's probably in extreme pain. CIO will never work with that.

So make sure to give her some decongestant right before bed, and have her sleep on an incline.

You can have her sleep on you, put a 6" wedge under her matress, or bring her carseat in and have her sleep sitting up. A swing, if she's little enough, is another possibility...especially for naptime.

You're actually lucky, like us...many babies and toddlers have to be in constant motion when they're recovering from ear infections...usually a kind of bouncing while walking thing. My parents had to take shifts sleeping when my sister would get hers...and I've helped my neighbors out from time to time (spelling them) with their son. Fortunately my son and your daughter sound alike, they'll sleep...but only if it is in a way that allows drainage.

It really sounds like your daughters ears are still hurting her. She screams everytime you lay her down and this is a classic symptom. My daughter is a good sleeper until she is sick and then all bets are off. I know you said she's on antibiotics, but it can take a few days for them to start working. I would go back to the Dr. and have them re-check her ears to make sure the infection is really clearing up. Also, they do have ear drops which can numb the ear canal. My Pediatrician prescribed them when we had some traveling to do and my daughter had an ear infection. You might ask about those.

I know that with my daughter I've started to panic about sleeping issues and in reality she was sick or teething and didn't feel good. She always came back to sleeping through the night, but sometimes it took longer than it felt like it shoud have.

Sounds like you have a strong willed daughter that figured out that if she screams long enough..mom will come. Some kids do get a bit spoiled when they get sick and when they feel better they are actually disappointed. I would start by just doing all the regular stuff...get a humidifier in her room, add some soft classical music, maybe a nightlight if you have something of yours she can have maybe that. But I wouldn't give in. Tell her "BEDTIME" and that's that. Have daddy say good night, mommy good night and anyone else in the house. Make a big deal about being bedtime and how tired we all are. My guess is she may have simply figured out that you go to sleep after her and she doesn't want to miss anything. No big deal..just enforce the law gently and tell her that its bedtime. If she cries, open the door..tell her no, bedtime..not time for crying. But don't go to her, don't pick her up..leave her there. Put a couple of walls between you and her and put some ear plugs in..as long as she is safe in her crib she will fall asleep on her own. Yes, she will cry, but 1.5 hours unfortunately is not enough. She has to stop on her own and because she wants to or at least wants to please you.

well,gosh S. that would tire someone out you could first check out her bed to see that nothing could be hurting her,any toys left in the bed, second, put a small blanket over her crib mattress under the sheet to stop cold air,is there a bumper guard ? it helps, third you could along with the others find a rythum toy thats soft like a heart beating she hears while being held to put in the corner of her crib and least but not last of the many other ideas try just messing in your room some while she sits and plays in the crib laugh with her to relax her toshe may just fall a sleepeven if you got to do it a little befor you bedtime drees her warm some ok fun times sleep ahead. S.

Maybe she is ready for a twin sized bed? We put my son in his big bed at about 18 months. I would lay with him until he fell asleep and get up and leave. Eventually I would lay with him for about 5 min and tell him mommy needed to get up and he needed to go to sleep himself. It worked well. He was always really good (still is) about staying in his bed and not getting up in the night. "The First Years" brand makes a good bed rail for the side. I hope you get some sleep soon.

Hi there. It sounds like your daughter is ready for a big girl bed. It may be that at this point she feels confined or trapped in the crib.
Also, she may no longer need a nap or at least a shorter nap time if she is giving you a hard time about going to sleep.
We dealt with something similar the last few months, my daughter is now 28 months, and sleeping nicely in a full size bed. It took a little while to adjust, she would get up a open her door because she thought it was funny, but with some work and a firm attitude, we are once again enjoying 10-12 uninterrupted hours per night.