Need to Transition Toddler to Big Girl Room

I would highly recommend putting a babygate in your daughter's new bedroom doorway to keep her from being able to leave her room at night. Also, of course a babygate at teh top of the stairs. Just be sure you still have a monitor in there and that she understands if she needs you she can jsut call out your name and you can come get her. That way she won't try to go down the stairs by herself in the middle of the night if she's scared or anything.

Good luck!

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While you are still at home start to transition her into the big girl bed at nap time. This way you can get an idea of how she is going to sleep in the big bed. Another thing that will help YOU sleep is to get a second baby monitor and place it in her room. Our youngest now about to be 5yrs sleeps on the other end of the house from us. We went from a crib to a toddler bed (at almost 2) and then a twin bed at almost 4yrs. The toddler size bed was great for two reasons. 1)It gave her a since of this is HER room because everything is on her level. 2)If she needed to get up in the night for the potty, she could easily get in and out of the bed without fear of injury.

D.
Mom of 2 (18 and almost 5)

I completely understand your situation. We are expecting our second child in the next few weeks and we needed to transition our 17 month old son into a full size bed. He now sleeps upstairs in his big bed with no problems. The first night we moved him to his big bed, my husband slept with him because our son is a crazy sleepter. Then the next night I slept on the floor in his room, just for my own peace of mind. He has done great. He has never fallen off or anything and he is still a crazy sleeper. He has been in the bed now since he was 15 months old.

We had a very similar situation and the transition went very smoothly.

My oldest was 21 months when we had our 2nd child. We read that we should complete the transition before the baby was born so there weren't so many changes happening at once. When we moved her to the big bed, she wanted her crib back. I left her crib in her bedroom with the big bed and that was a big mistake. In the begining, we would put her in her bed and she would climb back out and run towards the door. Once I moved the crib out it was only a few days before she would climb into her big bed and go to sleep. There were a few days when naps were excrutiating, but I was really impressed that the whole transition took less than a week.

I suggest letting her play on the big bed at first to become familiar. We covered our child's bed in stuffed animals and let her play up there during the day before we ever associated it with sleeping. Starting out with just naps in the big bed for a few days was also suggested to us. Oh, and it's definitely worth noting that we have a safety gate at the top of the stairs so she doesn't come downstairs on her own while we are sleeping and when she first started sleeping in her big girl bed I put a gate in her doorway as well for added protection.

hi E.,
i'm not sure if this is something you can or want to try but this worked for my husbands aunt and uncle with a similar situation. They had double glass sliding doors on their closet which was pretty big. They put their daughters toddler bed in there for a bit until she got used to sleeping in her own bed. Of course they took the doors off and moved the clothes out from that side of the closet. BUT..that would mean your daugher would be in your room although not in your bed. I know this isn't really a GREAT suggestion, but it did work for them and it made the transition easier on mom and daughter both. I have a son who is 16 months old and i wonder how i will handle this same situation when the time comes so good luck to you; i'm sure i'll be checking out your responses!!! :)
S.

I would just add to the suggestion of getting a toddler bed for her. We got ours at Wal-Mart for around 50-60 I think. At age two we moved our daughter from the crib into the toddler bed b/c the bed in her room is queen size. I just think they need the security of a smaller sleep space for a while longer.

As for being upstairs alone, it isn't something I would be comfortable with personally, but if you are then I would heed every single one of the safety suggestions that others have already given. If you are not comfortable with it but are doing it b/c you feel that you have to or you don't have another choice, maybe the toddler bed could go in the nursery downstairs with you guys? Or is there a second guest room upstairs, maybe you guys could sleep up there? Tough decision.

Back to work in one week? wow! You have your work cut out for you this week, our sleep transitions always took longer than that, I will pray yours will be quicker!

I was in that situation last year. My daughter went to a full size bed and never fell out of it. She was that exact same age. Her bedroom is upstairs next to the babies. I put a baby gate at her door so she could not get out of her room. I still to this day have a monitor in her room so I can hear her. Good luck with your decision and I hope this helps.

Have you thought about buying a daybed and having them share a room? This is what I did for my 2yr old son when my daughter was ready to transition (she was sleeping through the night). Also with the daybed and bedrail, it looks like a giant crib.

My mother thought I was crazy, but I think it was comforting to both of them, and they shared a room until she was two. To get your 21month old out of the crib, I would let him/her pick out her own bedding.

Hope this helps!

JC

When we transitioned my 2 year old into her toddler bed we pulled the bed into the playroom in front of the tv for several days so that she would be comfortable with it. I know that is not an option for you but I would spend ALOT of time in the new bedroom! Get her comfortable with the bed and the room so that it is a safe place for her.

Our nursery is right next to our master bedroom, but we took off the door off and installed a baby gate when our oldest was born. Some people I know had the same situation you did (moving a not quite 2 year old upstairs) and they put a screen door on the bedroom in place of the regular door. If possible, you could put them both in the same room together, and then move them upstairs together in a couple of years. When my second was born, the nursery downstairs became the bedroom for both of them, and we moved most of the toys upstairs. That way, the older one can go upstairs and there are not so many little pieces around downstairs for the little one to choke on.

Most new houses are built with a downstairs Master and I have yet to meet a mom that has a problem with that. The baby gate in front of the door is a great idea. And, I would definately keep the monitor in her room as well so you can hear her. Make sure you have WORKING fire alarms in each room of the house, and as an extra precaution alarms on any exterior windows or doors downstairs that indicate if one has been opened etc... And, if she has a window, I would definately make sure that any curtains or decor that can be seen from the outside do not indicate that a child sleeps in that room. I may be over doing it a little, but it may be these little things that keep your peace of mind at night.
My oldest has never had a problem with an adult sized bed, in fact we played it up so much he was excited the day we bought the bed, and I let him pick out his own sheets ....Spiderman was his choice :-)
Congrats on the new baby!

I just went through this with my daughter. Currently, she's sleeping on a full size bed on the floor. We have not set it up on the railings quite yet. So the height is perfect for her. Also, when my son went to a big boy bed he was 20 months old and on the 2nd floor. I put one of those safety door knobs on the inside of his door so he couldn't open it from inside. I kept the monitor on at night and could run up and get him if I heard him up trying to get out. He soon mastered the stairs so I was able to take it off. Now I just keep the stairs lit at night if anyone decides to get up.

There is no way on this planet that my almost 2 year old would be upstairs and everyone else downstairs. Not for me, and none of mine would have put up with it.

Personally, I would splurge on a toddler bed ($100 or less on craigslist)and put them both in the nursery together until I moved the master bedroom upstairs. I've never held for kids sleeping on a separate floors. One word - FIRE. Then there's the accidents - falling down the stairs, toilet drowing, bath tub burning. No way no way no way. Maybe my 12 year old - but not my toddler.

S.

Im in that situation now...I have a 19 month old, and she is staring to try to climb out of her crib. I purchased 2 gates...one for the stairs and one in front of the door of her room...I am a really light sleeper so I hear when she wakes up, but I am still nervous about her being up stairs...Hopefully 2 gates will do the job! Good luck...and hope it goes well!

what about pairing up your new baby with your toddler in the nursery? I would be nervous about having my 21mon old upstairs alone - she's still a baby too!

E.,
Slow down a bit girl, I think this could easily be a worry for your older child. Think about all of you moving upstairs for awhile, or finding a place downstairs for her, and put the baby in the crib.

For a couple of months move the older child to a bed, leave the crib empty, even put it away. Then get it back out this winter and put the baby into it. I'm afraid your daughter will feel like she is being (literally) shoved out of the next if you move her upstairs, and put the new baby into the crib right away.

25 years ago I bought a book called Tommy's New Bed, a Little Golden Book, and my children loved it. I'm sure there is something like that out there now.
A.

I purposely gave up a two story house because that would mean my 2 yr old would be in the bedroom upstairs. I pray your transition experience is better than mine. We started the transition at the 3rd or 4th month of my pregnancy, she was 2. We turned her crib into a daybed (convertible) and let her try that for a while. We tried to establish a bedtime routine, we tried letting her "cry it out" only because that had worked before. In the end she would still get up in the middle of the night and come to our bedroom. And because I was so tired and my husband had a hard time waking up to put her back in bed, she ended up sleeping with us. There was a point where she didn't want to sleep in her bed, she called it an "ugly bed". So I took it down and put it in the baby's room, and we let her sleep on the mattress on the floor. Then we finally got her a twin big girl bed. We would have to let her fall asleep on the couch and then move her into her room, although she still got up 2-3 times at night. My newborn is 5 weeks old and we are just now getting back to her going to bed at a decent hour (not 11pm) and where she sleeps all night without getting up multiple times at night.
Although all of the above are good points about safety and convenience, I would also consider the feelings of the child and what kind of impact this is going to have on her. Children like consistency. Good Luck!

No issues of being upstairs verses down stairs, but I did just convert my toddler to his own bed so that the crib can be freed up. It was suggested that we do it before the baby came so the toddler didn't feel like the baby was taking his stuff. Man he was quite proud of the fact that he had his own bed and that he could get in and out of anytime he feels like it so I don't think he will have a problem with the baby having the crib. Before you give the crib to the baby, you should give the toddler a since of ownership to the bigger bed so that they will not feel like they are being replaced by the baby. Otherwise you can potentially have two babies to deal with instead of a new born and a toddler.

Our toddler sleeps in a full size bed, but we have a bedframe that sits low to the ground. He does fine and he loves his big boy room! Good Luck!

My daughter is 2 1/2 years old and still in a crib (which she still loves) so I have advice on the change. However....my daughter has slept upstairs every single night since we brought her home. Yes...she is a long way away and we have a pretty big house...but it is her room and she loves it. DOn't feel bad about putting her upstairs. Just fix her a room, play in it alot, and get a gate and she will love it. Good luck!

Wow mom! I am feeling for you right now. You have a lot on your plate. I hope I can put your mind at ease a little. I dont know much about the upstairs thing, but I have a 21 mo. old and we just moved him to a twin bed a couple of weeks ago. He could probably be concidered a strong willed child, but he has done AWESOME in his big boy bed! What we did was to lower the side of the crib so that he could safely climb in if he really needed the security (in the same room), and (you might think I am crazy but) I let him be involved with "helping" put together the rails for the sides of the bed and putting the new cool sheets on. The first time he slept in the big bed was a nap and I let him get all the way to sleep before laying him in bed. This way he could wake up and see that he had already done it and it wasnt so bad. For night time, I was a little nervous. I read lots of advice from previous requests and responses saying that you should shut the door or put up a baby gate so that the child cannot come out. However, I felt uneasy about doing this. What we did instead was the supernanny technique where you just keep putting the child back in bed. There was only one night (about the 3rd night in) that he decided that it was a fun game to keep getting out of bed and peeking out the door. After about 10 times and 2hrs past bedtime I finally told him that it was time for everyone to go to sleep and I was going to close the door. He cried for about 5 min. and the next morning I found him sleeping in his bed. (I couldnt believe it). That was the last time we have had to do that. He really enjoys the freedom of being able to come out after naps and come find me. On a side note... the door is squeeky and so are the floors in our house, so I wake up if he comes out of his room. Best of luck to you. Maybe do it in stages so that she isnt jealous of the baby taking "her" bed.

Dont worry about it too much, it will work itself out! I worried about my daughter (now 8) and she ended up doing great. She has a queen sized bed and I actually prefer it for her. She still moves a lot when she sleeps. I just pushed one side of the bed against the wall and bought one of those really long bed rails. Also, make her 'new' room special. Pick out a couple of nice decorations and things she may like...Maybe buy her a new themed blanket, PJ's or something like that too. really stress that she's a big girl. Not sure if this would work for everyone, but the first time we had my daughter sleep in her 'big girl' bed we were all out at a friends until about bedtime. We drove around a little and she fell asleep. We literally just brought her upstairs asleep, plopped her into her new bed, and she was fine. Also, when my kids were little they all had night lights. It also helped. Ive seen a bunch of different kinds...They have regular night lights, ones that project stars all over the rooms and then Ive just seen the ones that the child can actually take to bed with them. I think it was at target. Really cute!
We never had a problem with any of our kids upstairs, but we also never kept them in our room, always in their own so I guess we never had to transition them into a new room, but Im sure she will be fine! If you have a monitor you will be okay. The person who said to put a baby gate in the door is a great idea.
We have a couple of night lights along the hallway upstairs in case we need them too.
Good luck with it! Try not to worry. We worried so much about all three of our (especially my twins) transitioning into their big beds and all three went easily. I worried way too much! : )

i have three girls. the youngest is still in her crib but....
i put the other 2 straight into queen size beds. we have a 4 bedroom house and no guest rooms so i opted for bigger beds that way i coudl accomodate adult guests easily. i have a screened in porch that serves as a play room so their rooms remain clean and tidy. fyi all our bedrooms are upstairs. we don't really allow playing in their rooms. anyway, the queen size bed is great. it is big and the girls have never fallen off. plus i get extra storage underneath the bed. i used rails and then pillows and now nothing. plus it is great for friends staying over. i have then turn sideways and can sleep 4 girls in a bed. works great for sleep overs. we plan to do the same thing for the baby at the first of the year. also, it saved us on buying one more bed, granted i could have easily passed it down but we also did not have to buy another crib mattress. we picked a bed that is not kiddish. that way they can take it with them to college. we just change sheets to the hot new thing and keep a nuetral comforter. as far as the stairs go.... we put in a gate at teh bottom and the top and have a good monitor. now the baby is a climber and can open everything so we have decided to flip her door knob once she goes to a real bed. that way i can basically lock her in and she can't lock me out. my monitor is a clip on so i cna always hear her. she is a great sleeper but part monkey so she worries me. good luck!

E. there are lots of great ideas here. My children are all older so it's been a very long time since I've gone through this. With my older two I had to move my oldest son into a big boy bed at about the same age as your oldest. We didn't have the two story issue to deal with, but I put him in his twin bed and put the rails on and he did pretty good.

WHen it was time to move my youngest we took the crib apart, put the twin bed together and put the rail on and put a gate on her door. At this time we did live in a 2 story house and I was terrified she would get up in the middle of the night and fall down the stairs. She had a tough time for a night or two but adapted rather quickly. The gate lasted a few months, more for my sanity than anything else.

Good luck to you!

Wow-lots of changes for that little toddler! Try not to rush it too much, at least do it in stages/"baby steps" as to no over-whelm her! If she feels that she is being pushed out due to the baby, resentment to either you two or the baby will arise.

My kids are 17 mos. appart. (That made my oldest, now almost 3 yrs old, almost 17.5 mos. old at the birth of my son, now 1)
We ran into this issue, though not the separate floor issue. What we did may help you out quite a bit!

This is what we did!

First, we moved the CRIB into the new room (Big kid room) as well as ANYTHING and EVERYTHING comforting to her and familiar (toys, wall hangings, other furniture, etc)and put her in there in the crib for NAPS only! The familiar objects are craved by toddlers. She STILL slept in the nursery for bed/night (in the port-a-crib/pack-n-play: if you don't have one, borrow one for a just a temporary time-frame) for about 2 weeks and the baby slept still with us in the basinet in our room.
Then, when she was used to napping in her new room, we had her do all sleeping in her new room, BUT STILL IN THE CRIB (this is what she is used to, the crib): a new room AND a new bed is scary for a young child! We also from time-to-time ended up with one parent on the bed in the new room for a couple of hours in the night (either at bed time or when the toddler woke and needed comforting) so she did not feel alone (all by herself upstairs in your case). You can then move the baby in the nursery (if you wish) in the pack-n-play! Newborns don't need a crib with a mattress anyways as they usually find a corner and "cuddle" in it. That is why the close-ness of the basinet is comforting to them. Maybe you could even put the basket-part of the basinet inside the pack-n-play for naps at first if the newborn seems un-happy.

Then, we finally moved the todler into the new bed but still left the crib in there for "sight support" for a bit! When she seemed comfortable, just one day, the crib dissappeared (in our closet) and was gone for about a week.
Then, all of the sudden one day, the crib re-appeared as different looking as possible in the nursery (different bedding/colored sheets, etc) and all was well.

Baby steps always seemed to work very well with all our transitioning! She did AWESOME in a todler bed!!!! She never had a problem falling asleep and we never had a problem keeping her in it. She is now in a big kid bed (as of last week) and doing just great (we left her todler bed in there for the time being)!

Good Luck!

As far as stair safety (we are all upstairs in our house), we have a WALK-THROUGH baby gate at the top of the stairs (we fashioned a door frame and hooked it to that. It is clear and opens like a small door (baby-gate height). And we have a reg. baby gate at the bottom. I have a monitor in both of the kids rooms (duel base, duel receiver) with the receiver down stairs in the kitchen (and I can take it with me wherever I go) so I can hear them during nap upstairs.