Need Help with 2Yr Old Sleep Issues

Hi,
My now 5 year old had some of the same issues and still tells us he does not like to sleep. Had never been a good sleeper and only started consistently sleeping through the night when he started Kindergarten! When he was a little younger than 2, he started with night terrors. We did a couple of things that seemed to help...no pj's with feet, no confining pj's or blankets at all and music at bedtime. We used mostly nature sounds and some baby lullabies. He listened to something at bedtime until he was about 4. He has pretty much grown out of the night terrors too. As for nap time, he grew out of that early too. We just did quiet time in his bedroom. Had to sit quietly and look at books for at least an hour. This gave us both a break. Sometimes he slept, sometimes he didn't but I stopped driving myself crazy trying to get him to take a nap.
Good luck with the new baby! My second boy is 8 months and also not sleeping completely through the night but we did use the Ferber method on him which helped a bunch.

I wish I had advice for you. My 2-year old is very similar. I'm going to ask our naturopathic doctor about melatonin (chewable)

Could allergies be an issue? When my daughter was 3 she would tell me she didn't like to sleep. She was also showing signs she was overtired throughout the day. She had a runny nose and congestion as well. Her Dr. started her on some allergy medicine. Initially it sedated her too much. We switched brands and she did great. Her sleep at night was restful and she was no longer overtired in the day. Perhaps a second opinion with another doc is the way to go. Good luck and congrats on your new baby.

Oh you poor woman!!! My heart goes out to you guys!! I know how hard it is when these little one's don't get the sleep they need!!

Well, from what I read in your post, i didn't see any mention of a routine for sleepie time. Maybe start implimenting one. I have an almost 2 year old daughter, and she is a good sleeper...granted I've kept the same sleep routine with her since she was four months...but i really believe it has worked with keeping her a good sleeper.

I use the same routine for bedtime as I do for naptime. I use "white noise" also to help her sleep. I have a soothing CD playing quietly in the background, and a humidifier going. (in the summer I put in a small fan and that helps too) She still takes a bottle (i know bad mommy!! ;-) but only for nap and bed. and then I read her a book and rock her for a little bit. I also try to make her bathtime at night before bed because it helps to relax her.

I really hope some of my suggestions help you!! Keep us posted and don't give up!!

I would try craniosacral. It can help kids who've had a traumatic birth, and ideally after he was born this would have really helped, but even now I would say just try it. It really helped my son a lot.

Hi E.,
Congratulations on your new baby too. I had a problem with my youngest daughter unwinding at the end of the day. She didn't fuss that much but made it known she hated to go to bed. And it would take her hours to fall asleep. So we started having tea time in the evenings. I would make chamomile tea with the flowers we grew that summer leaving some of the flowers whole for fun in the cup, while we had a dainty tea party, nibbling on the flower for a fresh tasting mouth to boot. It was fun and she goes right to sleep. So do I. Boy's that young should not have a problem having a tea time with you. It also makes a good quiet one on one time for you and your son. good luck, Marlene

I had a child with similar issues from birth. PLEASE take him to an Osteopath. Theresa Cisler is my recommendation here is Tucson. She will gently adjust his head. The compression of the head during child birth impacts a great many things, his fidgetiness, lack of sleep and so much more! It will really help and he will sleep so much better after that.
Good luck the Mommie Mentor.

We had trouble with our 2 year old, and a friend recommended "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems", by Dr. Ferber. It was a life saver for us. We didn't have the medical issues you had/have to deal with, so I feel for you there! But, since Dr. Ferber is a doctor, not just a behaviorist, I think it'd be very helpful for you. There were some "medical" parts that I skimmed because they weren't as relevant to us, but they might be very informative for you. Good luck! Hang in there!

Sometimes rubbing a child's legs, feet, back, etc can help them to relax. My nefew has asberghers and had a difficult time sleeping. My sister rubbed his legs at night and it allowed him to relax enough to sleep. Good luck.

Been there, done that. You have described my life with my step son and it got worse over the next couple of years. My stepson was ADHD and they didn't figure it out until he was 5. Unfortunately, (since children grow when they sleep) he was smaller than most kids. The day we got his medication he slept for about 10 hours and what an incredibly great child to be around when he could sleep. However, my mother-in-law didn't believe in medication, so she flushed it down the toilet and let him "deal with it". A divorce and 20 years later, the young man is 5 feet tall and didn't sleep well until after he was 18 and could get the medication on his own. Good luck and god bless. It can be just fine

I'm sorry you're going through this! It's hard to function well with a poor sleep pattern, and having a newborn just compounds it!

I would definitely keep looking for a pediatrician, just to make sure it isn't something organic. Sleeping is a function of rhythm, habit, comfort, and allowing yourself to let go. Maybe he has never really done this last one...so my suggestion is something called sleep therapy.

Basically, you go talk to your child in a soothing voice right after they fall asleep...go in about 15 minutes after he's asleep and just start talking to him. Tell him positive, present-tense statements about being safe, sleeping all night long, being comfortable...also include positive statements for his self-esteem, stuff about how much you and Daddy love him, how special he is, how glad you are that he's yours. Really tell him a lot about how he's safe and it's okay to sleep deeply. Getting this message into his "subconscious" mind, where the arousal has been programmed in, is a very powerful tool for correcting a pattern.

Good luck with that!

Hi E.,
There are a few similarities between your son and mine (he's now 3.5). He always had a hard time sleeping - As a baby he would cry frequently through the night; He never fell asleep in the car during longer trips until he was about 2 (he would just cry and scream - no matter how tired!); He woke frequently through the night until he was at least 1; and he was never calmed by being held. Even now he just has a hard time settling down and I often feel like he doesn't get quite enough sleep. But he is so much better now, and I believe it has at least something to do with the Magnesium we give him at night - It's called "Natural Calm" - I just mix maybe a 1/2 tsp in a small amount of juice before bedtime. The reason we started this in the first place is because he's battled constipation issues since he was about 1.5, and a Mg deficiency can cause constipation, and giving Mg can help regulate. Mg deficiency can also cause mood/behavior problems, which we've experienced as well. I would not want to assume or make you believe that this is the case with your son. There are tests that you can have done to confirm whether he has any type of mineral deficiency (and you can also think about whether he has any other symptoms/issues that could relate -- for our son, it was the disturbed sleep, mood/behavior, constipation, eczema, and toenails that basically don't grow and just look really unhealthy). If you suspect any type of mineral deficiency or even allergies (food allergies can often cause symptoms that might not be obvious) that might be something you can research. I actually had a hair analysis done for my son (sounds strange to some who haven't heard of it, I'm sure, but the minerals that are found in our hair can be a better representation of the "bio-available" minerals in our bodies, vs. blood tests, etc). The hair analysis can also show if there are any toxic heavy metals present. If you have any interest in this I can point you toward some websites and give you more details on my experiences. Please feel free to contact me. (I don't have any vested interests in hair-analysis or anything like that -- I'm just a mom who's done lots of research on my own to help my son, as all of the appointments with our Pediatrician, Allergy-specialist, GI-specialist, and dermatologist didn't ever seem to get to the root of what causes his symptoms.)
Best wishes!
--S.

As far as the naps, my kids both grew out of them by age two. I know all kids are different, but maybe just have him have some quiet time( look at books, etc)in his room instead of telling him he needs to take a nap. As far as bedtime, all kids seem to go through sleeping phases where they don't sleep well and wake up. Try to be consistent with him. Have you tried having him listen to classical music or nature type sounds to help him relax ?

E.,
I totally understand what you are going thru.. my oldest has always been that way and now he is 6. he still figets at bed time talking and singing and sitting up.. you name it. he has been diagnost with astbergers. it is very dificult at times but we make it thru. my thing with him is to give him what we call wind down time he lays in his bed with books now that he can read but before it was somthing reasonable to lay with, somtimes he falls asleep somtimes he doesnt but he know he stays there quite till i say he can get up because i too had a baby when he was 3 and was feeling the same way you do. i hope these suggestions help. i feel you honey

i have 5 children, and i used gary ezzo's books for 4 of them. they worked every single time, but you have to follow what it says. there are several books. the first one is "on becoming baby wise." it shows how to get your baby to sleep through the night by 8 weeks. and, yes all 4 of mine did sleep throught the night (7-8 hours straight) by 8, sometimes 9 or 10 weeks. we've never had a problem with sleeping since.
he has several other books for older children that are totally amazing. at the very least, check them out. i'm sure you can get them at the library if you don't want to buy them. good luck. ;)

Like some of the other mothers have suggested. Try to make sure you have a set routine, and try the laying in bed with a toy or book. Also try rubbing his back and legs. I would also find a new doctor that will actually treat you like a person. If your doctor cared, he would have at least suggested someone to talk too, or ran a simple test, or even try different things with you. I hope that you get it figured out soon.

I used and love the book "The No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers" by Elizabeth Pantley. Good luck!