My Kid Wont Sleep!!

in my opinion my dr is the best pediatritian ever and he told me that you should not let them cry them selves back to sleep until they are 6 months old. you should do what you feel is right dont do what everyone else tells you. you can never spoil them at that age there is no such thing! my little girl is 6 months and she slept in my bed with me every night til just couple weeks ago. now she still does every once in a while. ~S.~

Buy a baby massage book. It really helped both my daughter and myself relax and really connect. I started out by giving her a bath to relax her, and then massage, then a bottle, and she was out. And it helped me relax too, to be in tune with her little body. Good luck!

I had one like that, my 3 year still doesn't sleep through the night all the time, but is getting better. when she was a baby I used to swaddle her even though she was a little older and put a couple of heavy blankets on her so she felt some heavyness.But like I said she's still not a sleeper now!

Brittany G.

I am so glad you are letting your 3 month old sleep with you. You are promoting his emotional health, his secure attachement to you - an attachment which will reap rewards in his future independance. Futhermore, co-sleeping makes breast feeding better (no waking up for the mom) and reduces the risk of SIDS (babies seem to regulate thier breathing to their mothers breathing....)

Co-sleeping is pretty much the norm in every other civilized culture... Americans are very strange about sleeping arrangements - but your child is, quite literally, a little monkey. In the animal kingdom a 3 month old primate would NEVER be left alone to fend for himself.

Yes, certainly, babies are put to bed in cribs, away from their parents. And yes, of course... they get used to it. But it is NOT good for babies, it is NOT good for parents. And to allow your baby to cry it out????? For goodness sakes - from HIS point of view, he is alone, abandoned, and in danger!

Your child will be independant soon enough, but babies are not supposed to be independant... he cant walk, he cant feed himself, he cannot speak. Forcing him to become independant is a folly that will lead to clinginess and insecurity later.

For goodness sake - let him stay with you until he is bigger. Then, you can wean him out of your bed with a cot next to the bed... and then, soon enough, a big boy bed all for his own.

As to the unspoken concern... well, when you want your sex life back, wait til he is asleep, and put him in the bassinet. When he is a little bigger... move him to his room when he is soundly asleep when you want to be alone. Its really not that big of a deal.

For more on family bed and co-sleeping, check out Doctor Sears.

I don't haev any advice on how to break the habit, but to break it as soon as possible. My son is 3 1/2 years old and we can't break him of that habit. He slept in his own bed wonderfully until he was really sick one time and diagnosed with asthma...me being a first time mom and having asthma myself was scared that I wouldn't hear him if he had breathing problems and had him sleep in bed with me while he was sick...and that was fine it became something that happend only when he was sick until he was old enough to climb out of his crib then he would climb in bed with us so we got rid of the crib for a toddler bed, he would not stay in that...so we bought him a car bed thinking he would thinkg it ws so cool he would sleep in that, he didn't of course...then when i was pregnant with my second child I could not sleep comfortable in bed with my husband, my then two year old and my big old pregnant belly and was to tired to fight with geting my two year old to sleep in his own bed, so my husband got booted to the couch each night...i know it sounds like a super nanny night mare...if you ever watched that show she has a good technique to get kids in their own bed but my husband and i are always to tired to do it...we even have a mattress for our 3 year old on the floor next to our bed...some nights he sleeps ther all night, other nights it last about 20 minutes...we too are trying to break the bad habit we atarted before it begins with our second son who is now one and sleeps like and angel in his crib even when he is sick because I will not make the same mistake i did with my first but i am worried about what will happen when he can climb out of his bed and sees his big brother sleeping with mom and dad...Will I end up with two kids in bed...ussually I am too tired to care but my husband doesn't like it and half the time he goes tot he couch because not only is our three year old in the habit of sleeping in our bed, he is a bed hog and does kicks in his sleep if he does not get his space..

There's a wonderful book by Dr. Richard Ferber: Solve Your Child's Sleep Problem. I highly recommend it. Though his method is appropriate from only about age 5 months,it might be a good thing to start reading it. Chapter 5 tells you what to do (very simple) and the rest of the book talks about sleep pattersn/cycles and other kinds of sleep issues and solutions --even through your kids' teens. It saved our lives when our first son decided he would not nap/sleep and was up all the time, only catnaping day and night. Other friends have used it too and solved their problems. Itt took us 2 days and our 9-month old with a bad habit decided he could sleep through the night on his own.....again, very simple and very effective. Give it a shot!

I also could not let my girls "cry it out" but I paid the price. They didn't sleep through the night until 12 months old. I was a very tired and crabby mom for their first year of life.
I was reading some testimonies on the Arbonne website and a few moms said they put Unwind Bath salts in their children's bath water then sprayed Unwind spray either on the children or on their pillows. Some only did the spray on their pillow.Then their children slept through the whole night!!! If you want to read for yourself go to www.arbonne.com and click on testimonies. You can only get the product from an Arbonne consultant. If you don't know one then let me know (____@____.com)and I can mail you whatever product you want. I give 35% off all product! Hope you find something that works. Congrats on your little boy.

Wrap your bundle of joy down, put him to sleep in your arms before laying him down in his own bed. Does he have a mobile or something that has both music and lights to help soothe him.
PS: take time for yourself when he takes his little naps (20 mins does wonders for the body.)

If you don't like having him in your bed, DO IT NOW, no matter how painful it is. (I just re-read my response: we hated letting him cry it out, too--never worked for us, either--I'm simply advocating some VERY tired nights for you, by putting him down again and again and again and again...he will eventually get tired, but you'll be moreso, at least for a while.) This comes from experience...we had the same thing--oh, it's just easier to have him in bed with us...well, we now have a 3 month old baby...and a 3 1/2 year old boy...BOTH trying our patience at night! I wish we would have done it sooner. Will he sleep in a swing? Anyplace to get him a little farther away from you... My husband also thinks our baby smells me (he's a nursing boy) and thus wakes up more readily, eager to eat...it's worth a shot. We put ours in a swing at night, and then gradually weaned him to a pack n play...and now we're working on the crib. Oh yeah...and 3 1/2 yr old is finally working on staying in his bed...but we're still up 2-3 times a night with him! Ugh. You have my sympathy!! I know how hard it is!

I had a simmilar problem with my now 2 1/2 yr old. He slept with us until he was 9mo old. We finally got him in his own crib by giving him a stuffed toy to snugle. He still cried a little and the first week was torture. But I would sit and watch the clock and make sure he cried for 10 minuets before I would go in and lay him back down. He still has a hard time sleeping. In the end I think you have to do what is going to give you all a good nights sleep.

get "good night sleep tight" by the sleep lady at any bookstore! It totally works!

Amber H.

There is nothing wrong with letting your little one cry. basically it strengthens your childs lungs. It has been known they will cry them selves to sleep. Two days with trying to do so may not be long enough.

Try music and let him cry a way. They do have CD's out there to sooth the baby while sleeping. Possibly music can put him to sleep and keep him there in his own bed/room. Music or TV noises are good so when you have company they will sleep no matter what is going on. Make the little ones bed more special then mom/dad's bed/room.

You have him spoiled into sleeping with you. Nothing wrong with spoiling your children, after all they are your babes. Always keeping in mind that if you do some thing with your child the negative out comes as well. There are Pros/Cons to every thing.

We never baby talked to our children. Always speak plain out words with your babies. They learn to speak a lot snooner. Ready a story to him as your are putting him to sleep in his bed.

Rub his back until he falls a sleep. Pat his bottom as he lays there. Some times the movement will help to fall a sleep.

Some times that head security reminds him of being inside mother. Placeing some thing next to the top of his head like a soft toy, blanket.

Possibley the bed/room needs to be a cooler place to sleep. My sons were this way. My grand daughter seems to be this way. My grand daughter tells every one to close her bedroom door...she is a smart one to tell....lol

You can spend the time in your childs room as to familuize your child's bed, room, security.... You can bring something new into your little ones life that only in his bed, room will find it. Do not take the new item out of his bed, only his bed will he find it.

Don't take your baby into your bed or room for any reason, this can actually be a NO, NO as you have found out. Keep your bedroom door shut at all times.

I found that my little one did not sleep well in his bed was do to it being to confind, not enough room, to warm, not enough air circulation. So as to put him in a larger crib to give him the room and air circulation he needed.

MOM craw into the crib with him....lol Just kidding. I done this when mine was in the hospital for a week and all he done was cried for me. So I craw in and played away with his toys and he was like he was at home. As far as sleeping never had that problem.

Not knowning the full issue with your little one. A lot of parents find it easier to just put the little one in bed with them and later finding it so hard to break them from the parents bed.

Many things you can try, but you have to be consistant with it. Potty training takes more then two days to train a child in. Breaking from a bottle, drinking from a cup, eatting with a spoon, walking, talking.... All takes more then two days to master it in.

You have had your little one in bed with you more then two days for him to get use to it and want more of it. It will take more then two days of crying to break or master your child from sleeping with mom/dad in your bed.

Another thought may be to place pillows around the little one if he is not rolling and crawling by now with out you sleeping with him on your bed. Do this for a while then eventually move him to his bed. It may be you and dad that is the problem of security. Don't know until you try. May take a veriatey of things to try. Make each one a worth lengthly try before going to some thing else. Be Patient with your little one. Took him 9 months to arrive.

All else fails speak with your doctor. You may find new ideas as well as the ones I have mentioned.

Please stay in touch as what will work for your little one.

Your mamasource sister,
S. F.

Congratulations on your little boy! I have 4 children ages 6-12 and I remember those early months. Be assured that you and your baby can have some good sleep...he won't always be this little. :) getting into a wake/sleep routine can take a little work but it is completely worth it. It won't always go perfectly but if you try to be consistent it will work most of the time. I would suggest feeding your baby when he wakes up. After a little wake time (about 1 1/2 -2hours for his age) lay him down in his crib BEFORE he is asleep and comfy in your arms. If he is sound asleep and you try to move him he is likely to pop awake and be startled enough to not go back to sleep. A little crying is OK. He shouldn't be hungry. You will know if it is a cry of just being tired and trying to fall asleep or if he has so upset he needs you. Find someone who can support you through these early weeks of getting in a routine. You are teaching him to eat and sleep at regular times. Hope that is helpful! Enjoy your little one.
L.

You obviously know your baby was not supposed to "cry it out." I say if everyone is sleeping good together, keep it that way. I started putting my baby in the crib for naps, and worked on it slowly. He is now 15 months and sleeping in his own room through the night (mostly). Both my children will sleep in my bed for about an hour before we all get up. I recommend the book Nighttime Parenting by Dr. Sears. It reaffirmed somethings were as they should be for my babies age, and that my instincts were working.

By the way I am a WIC Breastfeeding Peer Counselor and mother of 2, Ages 4 and 15 mons.

For the sake of yourself, child and your marriage you really need to teach your baby to comfort himself. I know you don't understand this as it's your first baby but you should really teach your baby to sooth himself. Let him go to his own bed, and rub his him a little bit and then let him cry and he'll work it out (of course make sure all his needs are met). It will only take a few times and he'll understand. My children are grown and I can tell you, it will save you and your marriage. Remember, you will be still married once your child grows up and you are alone. Cultivate a healthy marriage and a content baby. Baby needs to learn to be happy with themselves without mom or dad over caring. Good Luck

Hello there. I don't know if this will offer any help or not, but our daughter(who is now 13 months old)slept with us until she was almost 6 months. That is the only thing that worked for us. She started out sleeping with me because my husband had to go back to Afghanistan when she was 15 days old. She transitioned into her crib for naps, and then finally for night time. She did not start sleeping through the night until just before her 1st birthday,but I believe that was because I was still nursing at night. It all worked out in the end, so you just have to do what works for you and your child. I did not believe in the 'cry it out' either because she would just get more worked up. There is no "one system fits all". It may take some time, but it will be ok.
K.

Hi Amber,

I recommend you check out "The Baby Book" by Dr. Sears. He has a section in his book on nighttime parenting. We've co-slept with all our children on purpose and have loved it. Our children are very secure and the older ones now all go to sleep on their own in their own beds. I know the fear is that the child will never leave your bed, but it's all how you parent them.

Enjoy your baby, it just keeps getting better and better. The reason we ended up sleeping with our first baby is because we weren't getting any sleep. It was exhausting! We learned that we are better people by letting our baby sleep with us, which is what gave us sleep. There are ways to do with and still be comfortable in your own bed.

Good luck!

I had this problem with my baby too. I really like the book "The BAby Whisperer" it is written by a nanny and she has very good advice, it is never too late to move him to his own bed and 3 mo is not that old. My son is now 10 months old and has been sleeping in his bed since 6 wks. and sleeps all night since about 4-5 months. Also the book "The Happiest Baby on the Block" is good too. Basically it talks about recreating the womb for your baby. This helped too. We now use a cool mist humidifier as the "white noise" but we used to use ocean waves on CD. Hope this helps! REALLY reccomend the first book!

Amber,

The whole sleep issue is a difficult one. I too went through some of the same things with my now 4 year old daughter. I just wanted to say that I had talked to my doctor about crying it out and from all of the info that I've received, it isn't reccommended until your child is at least 6 mos old anyhow. We eventually did it at 10.5 months and it was a life saver. After 2 days, she went down with no problems. Unfortunately, I don't have a whole lot of advice, except that it may help to get your child use to laying down when he is awake. Even during the day, with you by his side to get him comfortable with this new sleeping environment. It may take a while, but everything that I've heard and read says that this helps. Good luck. I am due to have my second child in May and I'm sure that I'll have a lot more to learn from this little.

God Bless

Here is an idea for you. You will need to buy a couple things, if you do not already have them that is. A swaddle blanket & an Air Vent Sleeper positioner. At bedtime give your son a nice relaxing bath with a "bedtime" soap. I think Johnson & Johnson sells it. It is calming/soothing. After the bath & you get him ready for bed wrap him tightly in the swaddle blanket. Then give him his night time bottle. Rock him to sleep in a fairly dark room so that there are not any distractions for him. After he is sleeping lye him in the sleeper positioner on his side. Make sure to adjust it to fit him before bedtime. You want it to fit him snug. This should make him feel like he is still being held by you. If he wakes up do not pick him back up. Just rub his back & head to try to get him to fall back to sleep. Another thing that you can buy, I am not sure what it is called. It is a clip that clips onto his crib & it vibrates the bed. I bought one for my son who is now 11 so I do not even know if they still make them. I got mine at The Toy House. It worked great! Maybe it made him feel like he was riding in a car. Most all babies fall asleep during a car ride. Hope this works for you~

Don't let your baby CIO. He's just in need of your warmth-- that is totally normal. My 7 onth old is spending most of the night in bed with my husband and I and I am fine with that (so is my hubby). She is our last baby and I know (having gone through this before) that she will be n her own bed soon enough.

Just be patient and hang in there.

I like the book, "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." It's a little confusing at first, but I really liked it. Sometimes anything is worth a try at this point!

I have three children. Two of which are not good sleepers. My advice is that you need to choose a time that they need to sleep on their own. It gets harder the longer they develop the habit of sleeping and manipulating you. I would soon start to let the baby sleep in the crib by themselves. When they cry comfort them for a few minutes, but don't pick them up. Then leave and go to the other end of the house and do a load of laundry or something. Then if they are still crying repeat.
Think longer term of your exhaustion and lack of time with your husband. Love you child enough to let them learn to calm themselves down. I know my 9 year old has a friend that still sleeps with his parents. That is the extreme and he is now missing out on sleepovers and socially this is a struggle. You need to be the parent and it starts when the children are vey young.

I had the same problem, but dealt with it for seven months before putting my baby in his crib. I read the book by Dr. Ferber (or Furber?) and it worked wonders for me. I also had a really hard time letting my baby cry, but was okay as long as I could check on him. I also found a natural sleep supplement (homeopathic) that I could give my baby right before bed. It is called Melatonin; the brand is Source Naturals. Get the 1 mg strength for a baby and you are able to give them the full dose. You can get it at any health food store. It says on the package not to give to infants, but my sister-in-law's neurologist recommended this to her and said it is completely safe, non-addicting, and will help produce the chemicals in your child's brain that will make them feel sleepy.

AMBER, HERE IS THE SAME PROBLEM,
I responded there also, and more advices,
please look @

http://www.mamasource.com/request/18071813551042854913

and, all the best to you!!!

There is nothing "wrong" with allowing your son to sleep with you. It's not a bad habit that you won't be able to "break him of" He won't still be sleeping with you when he graduates highschool. Trust me I've co-slept with all three of mine, they are awesome sleepers now (well the baby is only 10months but she sleeps through the night happily) the two older ones sleep in their own beds (5 and 3) and the baby is starting to sleep in her own bed all night as well.

Get him out of your bedroom now!!!
He will survive in his own room.

We put our daughter in the crib right away but she didn't sleep through the night until 6 months. I was skeptical of crying it out and don't like it when she cries plus I work full time. So we picked a weekend and laid her down and when she woke up I let her cry 5 min and then went in and pacified her even if she spit it back out I left and then let her cry for 10, then 15 then 20 all the while I was ironing at 3AM to keep my mind off of it. This might work. Another method is to go in and hold them to calm them and put them right back down. You may have to do it 50 times but with each night it may get better. no matter what you have to do what is right for you. Now my daughter is 8 months old and sleep 11-12 hours straight each night. Good luck! Also do you give him a bottle right before bed? We just stopped that but it helps along with a rountine of maybe Bath, book, prayers and bed. then they know what is coming. Oh sorry to ramble but we also swaddle her in a swaddle me and still do today. She just really likes that. Also some white noise may help in the child's room. There is a great site that has some ideas. http://www.momsoncall.com/

I am with you, I have had trouble with my son sleeping on and off. He is 4 1/2 now. Just keep in mind, some kids just don't need as much sleep as others, but, one tactic to try is to comfort him when you put him down, then stand next to his bed so he sees you, but don't touch him. Do this for a few nights. Then start moving down the crib a couple feet. Do this for a couple nights. Move farther away every 2-3 days. It is a slow process, but a drastic transition is harder for some infants. Try to get to the point where you are standing or sitting next to the door. Eventually, you will be able to slip out the door. The key is this needs to happen while they are still somewhat awake, so they learn to go to sleep by themselves.

Again, I am no expert because this is an ongoing problem at my household. This worked for my son when he was that age. Unfortunately, he was sick for about a month when he was 2 and we let him back in our bed so we had to go through the process again. Now he will go to bed, but my problem is he just doesn't sleep.

Anyway, good luck. I'm sure there are a variety of techniques and hopefully others will give you more ideas.

hi Amber, I know what it's like to have a crying baby. My first was really hard, really really.

A book that saved my insanity was "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" What i like most about this book is he is not partial to co-sleep, baby in crib, baby in your room, crying it out, etc, he explains the best ways to handle our babies' sleep habits within what we feel is best for us, or just what we can handle.

I personally feel that letting them cry it out was best for me, but I also think it's VERY hard to do it before they are about 4 months old. In my experience, CIO only took 3 days total - when done right.

My daughter did the same thing! I found that using a heating pad to warm her bed before I put her down helped. Also I would wait to swaddle her till I put her down. That way once she laid down she was tightly wrapped like she was being held still. I also fed her while she was naked. That way she wasn't too cozy to fall asleep before she was done. It's hard! I finally got her to sleep 10 hours at night and 4 hour nap during the day. Not any more though! She is anti sleep at 9 months. Needless to say I am a walking zombie. I hope I helped.

Gald to hear you are not a fan of the cry it out method, here is a website that gives some good ideas on how to make it less painful for you and your son.....

http://www.lovegevity.com/parenting/mother/baby_wakes.html

It has a lot of good information on sleeping issue, I haven't used it much but I know people who have, I have only used little excerpts from it, I am a co-sleeper, so when I have it's only been for minor things or new ideas. Good luck!

I have three children of my own 13, 11, and 10. I also work full time at a group daycare. It is very hard as a mom to let your baby cry, but some crying is acually healthy for your baby. Maybe try some music, for you and the baby. Find a soothing CD.
A regular schedule will help as well. Until I started taking classes for childcare, I had no idea how deadly allowing a baby to sleep with you really is. You can receaive more info on this through the 4C's. And it will at some point get harder. I made the same mistake with my son and he ended up sleeping with me until he was almost 5. We learn as we go. Also, you could try rubbing his back or stomache to sooth him while he's in his bed. If you stick to it, he will pick up on it in no time. Babies are smart.

Buy "On Becoming Babywise". It works! My 2nd child is now 4 months old and has been sleeping through the night since 7 weeks 1 day. She currently sleeps 11 hours without waking up and I am breastfeeding. Crying is normal. Read the book. The first couple days are hard, but your baby will decrease the amount of crying and get to the point where they don't even cry. My daughter doesn't cry at all anymore when I put her down and she wakes up cooing. It's wonderful for the entire family!

My son woke up 2-3 times a night and would cry until someone picked him up and soothed him back to sleep. He was adopted I think he was insecure and needed to know we were there. I broke him of this over time. I let him cry for 5 minutes the 1st day and slowly increased the time interval each night before picking him up until he didn't wake up anymore at night.

You might think I'm crazy, but try swaddling him. My son did the same thing, and swaddling helps because it makes them feel secure (they don't like to lay loose without Mom there). You can look up swaddling online, in the Sears Parenting book, some maternity shops offer courses on it called "Happiest Baby on the Block". When you do swaddling right, it will make your life easier. Dane would fall asleep as soon as we swaddled, and stay asleep longer. He was swaddled until after he was one! Otherwise, I think you'll have to just keep sleeping with your sweet baby (which is so lovely anyways!)

Well this is what I did for a while. I would lay him down in his crib but I wouldn't leave him until he fell back asleep. Sometimes singing him a lullaby, rubbin' his tummy or something to let him know that he is safe there and you are there with him. But when he falls back asleep again, then you can quietly leave. It got my son used to being in the crib and comfortable with it so when I would lay him in it when he was asleep, it wouldn't wake him. Yes, I fell asleep in the rocking chair a few times, but it was worth it in the end. Also try warming his bed before you put him in it. Laying an electric blanket in his crib to warm it up before you put him in it helps, just remove the blanket right before you put him down.

Try getting one of the books by Dr. William and Martha Sears ("The Best Baby Book Ever"??) - it has great advice for the 'family bed' concept.

We had all 3 of ours sleep with us as babies (I nursed), and it made for great bonding. Eventually they move on their own, but I personally think 3 months is too soon.

Good luck, be patient with yourself and your baby, and enjoy the closeness.

(I've never heard of anyone rolling over and crushing or smothering their baby this way, as long as they weren't on drugs or alcohol.) The Sears have a solution for that fear as well.

My 2 month old daughter sleeps with us in bed and it is the most beautiful thing! I am able to be so tuned into her needs, and don't need to get up for nursing in the middle of the night. She is already sleeping for long periods. She is a very content baby and rarely cries, maybe just one cry to let us know if her diaper is soiled. I did a lot of research before she was born and talked with numerous parents. What I learned is that babies need to be near their mothers or caregivers. They are helpless. They grow up to be much more content and self-secure when their needs are met as infants. I found one of the best books to be The Continuum Concept by Jean Liedloff, and the most helpful resources were books on attachment parenting. Dr. William Sears is the most well-known source on this, he and his wife have authored numerous books and have 8 children!
Letting a child "cry it out" teaches them that their calls for help will go unanswered. What do you think that will do to their sense of security and trust in people? They cry when they need something, and it is their only way of communicating. It is unnatural for babies to sleep alone. Most cultures world-wide practice co-sleeping. And think... your son was inside your body for nine months listening to your heartbeat and hearing your sounds. It is what he knows. What a change to come into the outside world with so much new stimulation. It is comforting to him to be with you, you are the only familiar thing in his life right now. And studies have shown that babies regulate their breathing and heartbeats with the mother when sleeping with her, their systems are immature, and left alone they may not regulate, possibly leading to causes of SIDS.
Concerned about rolling on him? Well, when sleeping you are aware of the edge of the bed, right? You don't roll off. Well, you are even more aware of your baby.
And there is nothing more rewarding or beautiful than waking up to your baby smiling at you!
(there are great networks of support in the area, check out nineinnineout.org/localgroups.htm)
sweet dreams to you both!

Amber,

This is the most common problem for new moms. Since you started letting him sleep with you, he is in that habit. You can break it by letting him go to bed with you and when he is asleep, put him in his own bed. Place your shirt next to him...the one you wore that day...so he has your smell. He will wake up and it will take about 3 weeks, but keep going and it will get better. The hardest part is when they cry, but if they are fed, warm and dry, it doesn't hurt to let them cry a bit. Of course don't let the crying go on for hours, but for a while won't hurt.

Each time he falls asleep, place him in the crib even if you have to do this several times. Eventually, he will get the idea that this is his bed.

L. :)

I would suggest that you try a fan or a radeo in his room. Sometimes its just too quiet. I have used a fan on all of my 6 children and they slept through whatever went on in the house, since it drowns out all the other noise. Vacuming, doorbell,dogs barking, other children yelling. My husband is a shift worker and I homeschool my 2 daughters, so I use one in our room as well. My oldest son is 33 in May and all my children still use a fan and use them for their children as well. You could also try to wrap him tight in a blanket so he feels like someone is still holding him. Good luck and enjoy him as they grow up so fast.

Like most moms you are probably laying him on his back to sleep to prevent SIDS which startles him awake. When my daughter was that age, I had the same issue. Then I read in a parenting magazine that if you begin by laying him on his side and gently rolling him over to his back there is less chance of him waking up. Laying them directly on their back can startle them awake giving them the sense that they are falling. I hope this helps, it worked for me.

Hi I have 4 kids 14,10,6 and 2 1/2 and I am a pediatric nurse. Babies cannot cry it out until about the age of 6months. Before that they just don't have the resources. Before that what has worked for me and many moms I know is to try swaddling. There are many things on the market that make it easier and work great. Also keeping a bassent by the bedside and having a consistant bedtime routine help enormously. We would have a bath every night, baby massage with some gentle lotion, and breast feed in a low light quiet room. As soon as they got sleepy I would put them down. It worked quite well. Every baby is different. Hang in there you will find what works for you. E.

Hi, Amber! I am a first-time mom of a 3-month old baby boy and also decided the cry-it-out method can wait. My decision to wait has nothing to do with anyone else's advice and everything to do with what I perceive to be the needs and capabilities of my son right now at this time in his life. There is a BIG difference between a 3-month-old and a 7-month-old. Although I think an older baby is capable and may even sometimes emotionally or physically need to cry it out (because they may already be over-tired and can't be soothed by mama or because they need to learn to be a little more independant) this is just too advanced emotionally for a baby that still isn't even aware that he has hands. Those first six months, the baby has one job and one job only -- that is to learn to trust that the world around him responds to his needs. I would rather have a baby that feels secure and confident than a baby who is a good sleeper early on -- there will be plenty of time for that in the months to come.

With that said, me and my husband have done a lot of experimenting to find what works to help our son sleep longer stretches (up until about two weeks ago he would want to eat every two hours around the clock, no matter what tricks we tried to stretch it out). We finally found that our son would sleep longer in his car seat than in his crib, bassinet, bouncer, or our bed, so now he sleeps in his car seat o the floor next our bed. He sleeps 9pm-2am, then resumes his usual 2-hour pattern until 8am. Still not perfect, but progress. Listen to your baby. Listen to your instincts. And if you believe in God, believe that He will prompt you on what your baby needs right now. He gave that child to you and your husband, to no one else, because He knows you are the best parents for your little boy's unique personality. It's good to seek advice, but never go against your gut!

Make sure he is swaddled in a blanket. And unfortunately i hate to say it too...let him cry it out. They need to know that they can comfort themselves also. -I have a 9yr old son and 3yr old daughter. Been thru it too. If you have to go to another room to cry it out because you feel awful for letting them be in there crying to. Or another option is check on him every 10 minutes or so. Another solution ... get a clock that ticks so he can hear it, it will sound like a heart beat! It helped my daughter. She still sucks her thumb though for comfort. Or leave him in the crib but touch him on the cheek or hand so he knows you are there. Good Luck! hope you find what works for you and your family!

I'm going through something similar. My now 5 month old got into the habit of falling sleep on me-literally using me as a pacifier. I too tried to let him cry it out since it worked well with my daughter. However, his crying was much worse than hers so I've decided to take my time with it and rock him to sleep for a while. Honestly you may want to try getting him to sleep in a swing first with you nearby. Smaller steps are working for me and I hope you find it works for you. Let's hope we both get some rest soon!!! :)

Good for you for not wanting your infant to cry himself to sleep! I have 3 children (5, 2.5, and 4 mos) and they slept in our bed until they were done nursing. It's the smartest thing I've done as a parent, so far. My husband never needed to get up at night and all I had to do was roll on my side to nurse. My babies never even woke up, I would just nurse them as soon as I felt them getting restless. When they were done nursing (anywhere from 16-18mos) I would make a big deal about them being "big" and we would get the toddler bed and put it next to ours (it was a weening process just like nursing). My son stayed in the toddler bed until his sister was ready for it, then he got a real bed in his own room (we took turns laying with him until he fell asleep). The cycle has continued and worked successfully for each of my kids. At 5 and 2.5 my kids are both in their own beds (but share a room for now) and go to sleep with nothing more than a story and prayer before lights out. One thing that's hard to remember is that they do grow up. Being a baby and sleeping in your bed is going to be the shortest time period in their lives. Try to make it enjoyable for your baby and for you too, of course! One word of caution: I would not recommend co-sleeping if either you or your husband drinks or takes medication, you might not be as aware of the baby next to you as you should be.

Hi Sweety,
I found white noise... I personally had a "mamma bear" strapped to the outside ouf the crip or a fan helped drown out the outside sounds. I also found that putting my babies down BEFORE they were asleep and then rubbing them until they fell asleep decreasing the preasure as time went on worked for me. I could not just sit in the room... I am a snuggler... but I could massage them until my babies fell asleep.

When my kids got older and they wanted to crawl in bed with me I would tell them they could not crawl in bed, but they COULD grab their sleeping bag and a pad and sleep beside my bed. My daughter would be found on my floor frequently sometimes. Now if she wakes up at night she will actually go sleep downstairs on the couch, shich is fine, it is probably more comfortable than my floor.

Once and a great while when my husband is out of town I will hold a sleep over in my bed. Or if I am super tired I will invite my kids to come take a nap with me so I don't say NEVER, but we make it a treat.

GOOD LUCK AND GOD BLESS!

We don't believe in CIO either. My doctor told me when my first child was born "Saying that crying strengthens a child's lungs is like saying bleeding strengthens his veins." :) Most books that recommend letting babies cry it out still don't recommend it before 6 months anyway. Even Dr. Ferber now says that babies younger than that should not be left to cry.

Your little one is still so young. Babies are hard wired to want to be near their mamas. Here are a bunch of articles about how to help babies sleep and sleep problems from Dr. Sears: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070100.asp As someone who's been through sleep deprivation with 4 babies now, you have my sympathy. Remember the number one parenting mantra-- This too shall pass. :)

Read the book "On Becoming Baby Wise" by Gary Ezzo & Robert Bucknam. I read it and put it to work and my 8-week-old baby boy has been sleeping 8 hrs a night in his own room for about a week now. It's great!

I always have my kids sleep by me but not in the bed. I put the crib right up to the bed and then take of the railing. Then adjust the crib mattress to the bed mattress. Then it is easy to get up at night and nurse but they are not in your bed. I would not stress out about getting them in their 'own' bed. He is way too little for that. It will happen. I usually keep my kids in until after they are done nursing (1 year). I am on #4 and it seems to work good for me.

Sleep, or the lack there of, is the most difficult thing about parenting for me. I am tired all of the time. My girls have both slept with me. My son was just a good sleeper. He slept in his crib from the start. We let our oldest sleep with us too long and she didn't sleep through the night until she was 4. I finally let the girls cry it out after they were 6 months old. It is hard. Once you do it, it only takes 2-3 days. Each day gets shorter and shorter and now the baby (11 months) doesn't cry at all. We have a routine of getting hugs and kisses from everyone, turn on her classical CD, I kiss her and put her in her crib saying "Nigh, night." I put her blankie in her arms and then her soft baby saying "Here's blankie and here's baby. Nigh night." Shut the door and leave.

I am not against co-sleeping. I actually love it. It just makes life easier for you if you can put them down and have that alone time for you and for your husband. It made a huge difference in my attitude/frustration level. My husband always got some alone time before bed because the kids always wanted me. It's draining. None of my 3 are scarred for life because I let them cry in their crib. They fall asleep within 10 minutes and only get up if they are sick, thirsty or have to go potty. :)

Good luck and hang in there. It WILL get easier.

I feel your pain! I had terrible problems with my daughter when she was a baby and my son (7.5 weeks) does a lot better, but it IS a struggle getting him to sleep in the cradle. What worked with my daughter was to swaddle her and jiggle the heck out of her cradle. I didn't use the crib for a few months. I put her in the stroller basket and just jiggled it. People thought I was nuts, but she loved it and quieted right down. If that didn't work, I would make a really loud "shhhhh" noise like static as long as my breath would hold out and keep doing that till she was calm while I jiggled. Usually within 10 minutes she would sleep. I do the same with my son, minus the swaddling and I don't have to jiggle so hard with him. If you don't want to do the shhhh noise, a radio that's not tuned in to a station can work well. And a friend of mine said she would be lost without her baby swing. Hope you get it figured out!

Hi, I'm a mother of 6, and grandmother of 1. My granddaughter is also this way. It doesn't help that her mom and dad are 17 and 18 respectively and are juggling their last year of high school as well as a baby. Out of necessity, Baby Sydnee would end up in bed with her mom. We have found that if they snuggle her arms around a stuffed animal or rolled up blanket and put a couch pillow on top of her tummy she will sleep through the night. (we think it makes her feel like she is being snuggled.) Interestingly enough my sister used to have to put a shoe on her son when he was a baby. Don't get discouraged, every baby is different, just keep trying and you will figure out that one thing that helps your baby. I hope this gives you a little help:) S.

I have had eight babies and must admit that they all prefer sleeping next to warm old mamma. I encouraged them to sleep in their own beds for the first part of the night though. Somtimes they just need to be held and comforted for a little before being put back in their beds. I found it most helpful to wrap them securely in a blanket. The swaddling method has been used for generations.