My Daughter Is Talking Less than Before

Updated on October 19, 2009
J.M. asks from Toms River, NJ
8 answers

My 15 month old daughter used to say about 15 words without a problem and on cue. Now when we ask her to say a simple "mama" she refuses. It seems like she is picking up new words but just seems a lot more quiet than before and has to be in the mood to chat. I hope she is not regressing and wanted to ask if anyone has advice on how to get her to chat more.

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J.P.

answers from New York on

I was freaking out about this too over the past few days. I have twin girls who are just about 16 months old. They both had similar vocabularies but one was always a bit shier, not shy by any means but not as outgoing as the other. Well I started to notice the same thing - she was not saying words on command, etc. Until this morning when she woke up and started pointing at things on her own and saying what they were. If I ask her to say cracker she won't do it, but later if she wants a cracker she will ask for one. I personally will be keeping an eye on it because I am a very paranoid mom, but I am hoping it only means what the others have stated about excersizing power and control.

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A.G.

answers from New York on

Don't panic!!!! My daughter talked at 9 MONTHS old and had about 40 words she used regularly. At 1 year and 1 week old she STOPPED talking completely!!!! I freaked BUT was told to wait and see what happens in the next year. I taught her some sign language and she made a few signs of her own but she did NOT talk except for mama or dada for the next year. At 2 years she was reevaluated and speech therapy started. 9 months later she was talking ALL the time (yes in her sleep too!)and was testing at the 5 year old level. The doctors (I took her to several) and speech therapists (several there too) said that some kids have to stop doing something for a while because their brains can't do it all at the same time. They described it like this, she was learning so fast that her speech stopped but not her understanding.
If your really worried talk to your doctor but if she is just not talking as much as you think she should think about these questions.
1. Is she understanding the same amount or more as she was?
2. Is she able to focus on something (when she wants too) and complete the same tasks she was doing or even more?
3. Is she interested in things and people around her?

If YES to those I wouldn't panic. She may just be taking in so much she doesn't feel the need to talk. Also If she is anything like my kids they NEVER talked on comand it was only when they wanted too! I even found that if I pushed they only became more quiet! A.

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M.T.

answers from New York on

Hi J.,
Learning to talk isn't about having kids parrot words. that's not talking. I wouldn't ask her to say words. Learning/aquiring speech is about them picking up on words being used and using them. The way to encourage her to speak is to continue pointing out things and telling her what they are called, as she watches you doing things tell her "I'm emptying the dishwasher, " read to her a lot and continue talking to her.
She's refusing to repeat words when asked because she CAN, she is learning about control.
good luck!

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D.S.

answers from New York on

Hi J.,

I think what is happening is she doesn't want to talk when she is asked to. It's like asking them to show off what they know for grandma, they never do it. She is probably just learning how to exercise some power. If she doesn't want to talk she isn't going to. I wouldn't keep asking her to say things I would just talk with her. Continue to show her and tell her about her surroundings and she will continue to pick up words. When you play with her or read her a story point out different objects and tell her what they are. Eventually she will become a chatter box but it has to be when she is ready. I wouldn't worry.

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A.D.

answers from New York on

She is probably just in the process of learning how to put words into sentences. Just keep speaking to her and explaining the world around her like you normally would. Ask her if she wants food or drink and simple questions requiring a response (even if all she will do is point). Use word names for everything (cookie, book, bird, etc.) but don't ask her to parrot them, just keep adding new words for her to hear. Wait a few months and see if some new development (forward or backward) occurs. You can definitely bring this up at her next dr appt, or call her ped. if she is not scheduled for one for awhile, but I wouldn't stress about it yet.

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M.L.

answers from New York on

My daughter us 3 and has always "regressed" before making a LEAP forward. (I think she was embarassed to make a mistake, so she held back until she could fugure out all the rules.) I wouldn't push your daughter...praise her when she masters a new word, and sit back and wait. She's just about the right age to be starting phrases next!

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B.P.

answers from New York on

Kids go through phases and she is gaining more independance and a sense of self. Just watch and see if other behaviors are involved. I am sure its nothing...but I know...I worry about that stuff too. :)

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S.T.

answers from Albany on

J. I wouldn't worry about it. Read her books and ask her with picture book, what is that girl doing? Is she kicking the ball. What is that, is that a bird? What is bird doing? Something that may help her to say what is on her mind when she sees things. My boys never really liked to say things when commanded. The only thing was with my oldest, he was saying a lot of things about 1 year old and then little by little he was regressing and got to a point I didn't know what he was saying. So, I talked to the pediatrician and I had to get him speech therapy and singing the song first in the therapy helped hiim want to talk. She did singing and then book reading and then play. He loved the singing and that you had to use the hands too and then one day hebegan singing the songs on his own showing the therapist that he can do it and he didn't want her to help. I helped with his speech by reinforcing what she did and told my husband what he worked and he helped reinforcing it too. Read to her and have do Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, Itsy, bitsy Spider, I had a little turtle but use hands, etc. and do with hand movements. They like that. Those are simple t hings and see what happens. They said that they think because he walked at 10 1/2 months, the motor part of the brain was developing which stopped the speech part of the brain. Just keep working with her and if she is a chatty person, accept her quietness. I am more of listener rather than a talker. I talk and share my thoughts, but I listen to what others say and then may have input. You are wonderful mom for caring about her and since she's your first, you will worry more, we all have with our first.

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