Mother Vs. Babysitter---Another Problem

Hy H. I just read your message right now and I think is no excuse in the world for dont feed a baby its inacceptable, I told your because I take care of babies at my house and sometimes I dont have the time to feed myself and it doesnt matter but the babies are first and always at the same time and always with the same love to them, so my phone number is 972 939 75 86 if you are interested.

Have a nice day Hanne

She "didn't have time to feed her"........ wow, must have been a really crazy day. I guess we should assume she didn't have time to feed herself then either right?? That she herself went all day without eating also because it was just too busy??

If she is that overwhelmed then she's watching too many kids. Take yours out.... it will ease her load and you will ensure that your daughter is being fed by someone who does have time...... that's insane.

~ t

Well, she's a poor excuse for a child care provider if she won't even take the time to feed your baby. You've been specific and have given her the benefit of the doubt. I agree it's time to look elsewhere. As someone else said, it will be hard to find part time care, if you even consider in-home child care now. We are limited to the number of children we can keep in our homes. Irving is one of the few cities that will not allow group-day-homes (12 children to 2 providers)....so the limit is six to a provider home in my particular city, according to specifics on the ages; and some are allowed two school aged kids, if the number of preschoolers/toddlers/infants are within standards. But then you would have to consider your child being transported during before and after school pick up. The City watches us closely and comes into our homes unannounced at least 4 times a year...more if necessary. Besides that we have 3 food monitor visits each year and an annual fire inspection, along with with an annual fire extinguisher check/service and a gas leak inspection every other year. The state makes a call once every other year...more often if a complaint is lodged against the provider. So, *most* will follow the requirements closely in this area. There are various things you can look for to be sure you are dealing with a licensed or registered home. We specifically do not miss meals and, as someone else mentioned, we have you fill out a sheet each month listing the foods you will allow your child to be fed. So, it's all in writing. Both the parent and the provider sign this statement, so there's no arguments about it.

I'm sure a number of moms here can help refer you to someone or you can start by looking for your city Child Care Providers Association. Your provider should have certificates showing a minimum of 20 hours annually of nutrition and early childhood development training, not including their CPR and First Aid training (along with Infant Brain Development, aka Shaken Baby Syndrome, annually) every other year. The provider, also, must show proof of a tuberculin skin test done annually. Being a professional child care provider doesn't come cheap or easily in certain cities.

We pay our own quarterly taxes and healthcare benefits. So, you can be sure we are serious about our work. Now, I'm speaking for those who are professionals and love their work...and will work with you in every way possible to give you the assurance that your child is being well cared for. Please don't judge us all by this first experience. I'd be more than happy to share my Guidelines with you...so you can see what kinds of questions you might want to ask as you look for new care....besides your own specific requests. Be sure to get as many work and personal references as possible and ask to speak to someone from their local church group. The pastor at the church where I work on Sunday mornings has referred many families to me because of the work I've done there over the years. You just can't get too many references.

Their home speaks volumes, too. And to be honest, you can tell how much time they spend with the children by the other children's attitudes in the presence of the provider and by the amount of activities you see around. My group is my job...and I'm sure a lot of providers feel that way. I'm working through the day, just as you are, and don't always get a break; but that's the way I prefer it. I don't spend my time cleaning house while your children are here or taking care of personal business. I have my evenings and weekends to take care of my own things. So, those are some of the simple things to look for in your interviews, from my point of view.

I am so sorry for the bad experience. *Most* of us are so proud to be a provider and love to share our views with others. There is an excitement I feel when I talk about all of the children and families I've worked with over the past 22 years. They are my extended family. Most stay in touch with me long after the children leave my care. Christmas is a favorite time for me when I hear from so many of them and get pictures of them as they've grown up.

Those who look at their work the same way I do, are continually looking for new ways to improve on their services. We attend workshops and share ideas with each others. So, yes, I'm very enthusiastic and defensive about my work and those whom I know feel the same about what we do. But, I won't tolerate someone abusing a child in their care. You do need to file a complaint with the state and with her food program representative, if she has one. If she's not licensed/registered and/or does not have a food program for her group...that may be part of the problem.

I apologize for being so verbose...

Sincerely,
Miss B.

http://www.missbrenda.com

No excuse. What 4month old or any new eater for that matter eats quickly? Sounds like she lakes patience the key ingredient to watching children. I know it is difficult to find but do try finding someone else. If you go to church check with your church nursery to see if they know anyone who watches children. Ask your pediatrician. I read you last posting and noticed you need someone for 3 days a week. Can a day care provider watch her? I know it is difficult to find one for a part time baby, not many will except them. After my incident with an in home provider and reading numerous others I have really lost faith in them. My apologies to all those who take excellent care of little ones, I know you are out there, but where?!. Call your local licensing office and talk to them and ask if she can refuse to feed a child for lack of time? Of course if you do this I would make sure you have alternate care set up for her. Best of luck.

Yeah, no excuse for that. Get another sitter right away. Ask here and with your friends for recommendations. Good luck.

Hi H. -

I would pull your daughter out for sure. You have lost trust in this caregiver and no telling what other instructions of yours she is not following. This is a very tough situation because it is your child. Bottom Line is, she is employed by you. You are giving her specific instructions and she is not following them. I sent my son to an in home provider and ran into the same types of issues. I know there are Great in home providers out there. But for myself I now prefer a daycare environment for a few reasons. At the infant age there is always more than one caregiver in the room and this provides accountability and an extra set of eyes. Not to mention there is a director that you can talk to if an issue arises and they will make sure it gets resolved. Next our children are mingled with other children the same age. My son is 4 and it is amazing how a few months difference in age still matters. Go with your gut. A Mother's intuition is ALWAYS right. My son attends Cornerstone Learning Center in Grapevine and they do offer part time care. We were 3 days a week until this week since he is now in Pre-K

Here is the number ###-###-####

Good Luck and keep us posted.