Mom's of Kids with ADD/ADHD

I just read an article about there being a connection with add/ADHD and sleep disorders. Might be something to look into if you not want to o the medication route quite the ped and I have discussed a sleep study for other reasons so when my son goes in a few weeks for a physical I will mention it again.
http://www.wwlp.com/dpp/health/pediatrics/adhd%2C-sleep-d...

My daughter is10 and has non attentive ADD and dyslexia. The meds had great daytime effects but bad nighttime or long term ones for us. There are 3 families of meds: amphetamines, methyl phenidates and non stimulant meds. There are short acting ones (the older ones, where you had to take 3 tables spaced out over the day like Ritalin, this is difficult for remembering to take them and having to take meds at school as well as causing up/down emotions that most don't like) and newer ones are medium to long action (8 to 12 hours). We tried Vyvanse (long acting amphetamine) which had fabulous daytime results but did not allow my 63 pound girl to sleep at all (you start all on the lowest dose to see if it has any effect, overdose of this for ADD kids makes them into zombies, not hyper.) For her the Vyvanse lasted way too long since she fell asleep an hour before having to get up.So we switched to long acting Concerta, which did last about 11 hours and she was able to pay attention and finish class work, she did her homework on her own in 1 hour for the very first time, and it seemed to work well. After 3 months on this med she became moody and then depressed. We stopped over Christmas vacation and she was her normal self again, and she herself felt it was the meds. We now have a trial pack of Strattera which is non-stimulant, but needs to be taken in very small started dose and increased over a month since it has stomach ache side effects. My daughter would prefer to not take any meds, so we are trying accommodations in class and doing homework after dinner when the mental fatigue of attending boring and repetitive school has worn off a bit. I am reading a good book that views ADD/ADHD not as a "disorder" (who would not have self esteem issues being labeled defective) but as a different learning style that was useful in the hunter/farmer times (hunters have ADD, farmers have linear brains). We have also explained it to our daughter that way: she is very bright, will have a wonderful time in life after K-12 is over since she is curious and intelligent but just does not match well with the old fashioned way school is taught by sitting still and listening to someone lecture or write. Check out charter schools that have a more hand-on approach, we have one locally that we hope to send our daughter to. Either that or home-school, but I do not think I am cut out for that. Here is a link to the hunter/farmer way of explaining this different learning style:
http://innerself.com/Parenting/hartmann_2135.htm
Here is a list of positive attributes of people with ADD:
http://www.addcoach4u.com/positivesofadd.html
I think you need to explain to him that regular K-12 school is the ONLY time in life you are expected to be good at everything, where people expect you to sit still and listen for 6 hours straight, and where people who have a different kind of brain do most of the teaching. Good luck with everything.
PS: I swear my college room mate had ADHD although it was not known in the 1970's and she self medicated with coffee all day long. She could have a cup of coffee at 11 PM and fall asleep at 11:15. I do not think caffeine creates the same dopamines in the brain, but adding stimulation into their system seems to satisfy their brains that are looking for more input, which in turns calms them down.

This is so tough, especially in the teen years. His low self-esteem could be resulting in part from the hormonal stuff plus the behavioral garbage going on in school with other kids. Sending him to a learning center was a well-intentioned move but it seems to have made him feel he's not worthy or not intelligent. If his high school has some hands-on courses (since he is good with mechanics), let him sign up for those. Some kids do well with things like CAD/CAM and it boosts their ego.

My friends who are teachers had a tough time with the meds idea because they see the effects on other kids in their classes, but they also worried when their kids got to 15-16 years of age because they were worried about focus when the kids got learner's permits - driving while distracted scared them more than studying while distracted. They solved their kids problems with nutrition.

It sounds like your boy is enthusiastic when something interests him, and he wants to achieve. Attention and poor grades are rarely about intelligence - it's more about learning style and focus. Your son is worried about not achieving at this point, so he's not going to take on anything where he feels he is doomed to failure.

I have a seven year old daughter with ADHD. After trying behavior modification and doing a lot of research, we finally came to the conclusion to do the meds. It helped my daughter focus more and her school work improved dramatically. For an example, within one month she went from a level one in reading to a level four. So with us, the medication along with behavior modification (basically positive reinforcement) it has worked well with us. You could have the dr put your son on the lowest dosage possible and see how it goes. Keep in mind, it might be trial and error until they find the right one for him. So far no bad experiences with us. But again, that has to do with finding the right meds. Good luck!!

My son is 6 years old and we have been dealing with this constantly for one year. I'm not an expert at all. However, I do really like the explanation that the other poster gave about K-12 being the only time in your life that you expected to exhibit these behaviors of sitting still for many hours and learning. My son is on the lowest dose of Adderall and seems to be able to focus more; however, recently he started not completing work again in class. We tried increasing the dose and he wasn't able to sleep. The medication can help the kids to be able to achieve and then feel better about accomplishing something. However, there are alot of issues to deal with on the medication. With a teenager, I would definitely have a very open conversation with him to figure out what he'd like to try. Then go forward with whatever your family decides. Putting him in things he loves will also help boost his self-esteem. Good luck with your choices!!! I hope all of you find success and peace of mind.

I know I am late getting in, but wanted to comment. I have a son that is ADD/ADHD & Dyslexic. His IQ also is only average, although he is highly intelligent (even his counselor stated it). The basic IQ tests do not test these children in ways that their true intelligence shows. My son learns in a different way than others & it is NOT going to show up on paper. You have to judge his intelligence by what he has to say. My son is the same way, if it's in his interest he can spout every fact about it, but if it's not don't even try & hands on is the BEST...mine loves mechanics, also. He also retains what he learns on the Discovery Channel & places like that. I make no emphasis on his grades & I never make him feel bad for what the school can't deal with/teach him. The organization is the toughest because if the work doesn't make it home, I can't help him with it. I do not medicate for many reasons & yes, I struggle with that decision EVERYDAY! I've had several dealings with people on meds for this. One - my mother - she was diagnosed as an adult, but thought the meds should do it for her. They can't, they are a tool, not a miracle fix. Two, my adopted brother - I believe he was misdiagnosed & his issues were a. he was highly intelligent & b. his previous lifestyle before being adopted. While on the meds he was antisocial & withdrawn but made straight As, he's a Senior this year & his Dr. took him off of the meds & he is still succeeding, but is social & active. Three, is my cousins child, whom we have approx. 50% of the time, when he is on his meds, he sits on the couch & does nothing, almost like a zombie, when he is off of them (which is why he likes it at our house in the summer - we don't make him take it), he goes outside & swims, skateboards, & will go places with us (he won't even go to the mall or Grant's Farm when on meds). The other thing is in all 3 of these cases they have been put on other meds along with the first med to counteract side effects. It is a horribly difficult decision to make. As others have stated, I do try to control my son's diet & that does help. The proper amount of sleep helps, but the melatonin (herb) I was giving him had bad sleep effects (may have been too much). I used NAET (www.naet.com ) as a tool & that helped tremendously! I also, notice my son's success depends on the teacher he has. Just FYI, schools do not test for Dyslexia (it's more than reading writing backwards, www.dys-add.com ), so if your child might have something as that with the ADD, the school will not pick up on it & tutoring will NOT help. They have to be taught in a specific way. It was $1000 out of my pocket, but worth it because I knew my son had it & the school argued with me that he didn't. Something else you can look into is crossinology. There's a lady in Ballwin -?? that does it. You can google crossinology & your zip & she should come up, if you're interested in alternative approaches. Sorry if I rambled too much. I hope you find what's best for you & your son!

I have an 11 year old that is now in the sixth grade. From Kindergarten up until the 3rd grade the teachers would ask me the same question and after telling them he wasn't on meds they suggested I get him evaluated. I didn't think it was any point in doing that because I was determined not to put my son on meds. His schoolwork was o.k. but it could have been ALOT better. He was rushing through work, not focusing, and forgetting things all the time and he was not focusing. But it just got worse and I couldn't deal with it anymore. I am a single parent and I was the one the teachers were calling when he would get into trouble and I had to go to the school. Anyway about the end of the 3rd grade I got him evaluated and he was diagnosed with ADD and I put him on the lowest dose of Concerta...yes it did help. But not too long after that we lost our insurance and couldn't afford it anymore. He was on it for about a year...but I think he kinda outgrew most of the problems he was having. I haven't had a call from the teacher in about 2 years. He still could improve on the grades...they're not bad but could be better. He still forgets a lot and is VERY unorganized...we just try to work with him. I don't think that is enough to put him back on meds. Sorry for the long response...but YES it did help him for the short time that he was on it and NO bad experiences at all from the meds!!! Good luck!!! Oh and btw....he also can have a bad attitude too if it's something that doesn't interest him. He is also very loving and loves to read & very intelligient....he is in gifted classes and is good at math and science!

As a person with ADHD myself I was on meds as a child. I can not tell you how much they helped. yes they had side effects, but the benefit was that I could actually pay attention and learn. I quit taking them for 10 years and am now back on them (you shouldn't take meds like that and have babies, but your son shouldn't need to worry about getting pregnant...). I was given IQ tests when not medicated and while medicated and my IQ went up 35 points while on the meds. As it was explained to me, I wasn't smarter on meds I was just able express and understand faster and more accurately while on the meds.

I will also recommend getting professional help in coping mechanisms for dealing with ADHD. They are easier to learn while medicated (at least for me). Less sever cases can actually just learn the coping mechanisms and then get off the meds forever while others.. well it helps because you can't be medicated 24/7, at least you shouldn't.

Don't get me wrong, i do dislike the meds too. It makes me feel sometimes that the way I am is not good enough and I do like being in, what my mother calls, La-la land where I can just tune everything I don't want to hear or think about out and live in my own little mind. They take some of my creativity until they wear off. The transition to them taking effect and coming off of them is rough on me too.

The meds do make it so I can be a better mother and wife. I am more patient and able to get more done, not just at home but with my children. I am able to organize and schedule my day and I do finish the tasks I start. I am able to break down large tasks into smaller chunks and even feel when I am about to be pushed over the edge (instead of not feeling the warning signs and just blowing up, for lack of a better word).

Also I notice that are times of the day that I need meds and others that I do not. Mornings for me are usually very good, so are late at night but noon to 5 are just terrible. If he can schedule his school day at all he might be able know when he can understand difficult things better. Because morning are good I can usually tackle difficult things then, but if you are making me learn something then and then make me revisit that difficult thing at 2 or 3 pm... bad timing for me. I will not be at my best and will take much longer to do it.

My oldest has ADHD and putting her on meds has helped so much! Meds aren't a punishment and if you can get something him I would try it.

I don't have a child with ADD/ADHD--at least, not one diagnosed with them! I do, however, know quite a few families who have taken the nutritional approach to dealing with these issues & have had a lot of success. The medications may be better than nothing, in some cases, but due to their known and probably unknown effects, if you can solve the problem with nutrition, go for it. That way, you get added benefits instead of added negative consequences. I've even been able to help my little autistic great nephew with nutritional suggestions.

If you'd like to talk with some of my friends who have successfully helped their kids with nutrition, I could put you in touch with them.