Lunch Room Wonderings

I don't think it's the aides responsibility to negotiate with a kid to get them to eat. I would want the food sent home to see what they are eating and what they are not. If they were only eating the snacks and not the main food, than I would stop packing the snacks.

I am with you on that issue! May be the lunch aide can get a parent-supervisor help daily from volunteers.
Kids need to be stired towards right food choices and yes, I want to see what my kid not eaten.

Except in the issue of throwing food away (I want anything not eaten to STAY in my son's lunch box)... absolutely NO. I do not want anyone having anything to do with my son's food or eating habits.

Many, if not most, people have VERY strong opinions on food. I don't want other people's prejudices and preconceived notions about food pressuring my son, especially not adults he would want to impress. Of course there will always be peer pressure, but it's a level playing field... having an authority figure say something is *entirely* different than a peer.

When my son was in school, or now when he's in daycamps... I always pack about twice as much as I think he'll want to eat (ditto, we do large servings at home). The rule is, he eats as much of what he wants, and saves the rest. But I've had busy body aides tell him he has to finish ALL of his food, or not touch x until he's eaten y, or in any other way micromanage his eating or diet and it ***infuriates*** me.

To expect the lunch aide to supervise and encourage my kids intake is unreasonable to say the least.

I personally do not pack candy bars in my kids lunch box so there is nothing to negotiate. I do discuss their options to ensure that they have a meal that they at least have an opinion on and like.

I prefer to have the leftover food remain in the lunch box as it gives me an idea of how much my kid consumes.

Would I *want* them to do this? Yes. Would I expect them to? No Would I do it if I were them? No. It is not their job to see that your child eats their lunch.

I have worked at schools for years. I kind of try to get children to eat the good stuff first, then wait for the treats. The problem is there is a time frame which always makes me very very very angry. The kids are forced to shovel their food down sometimes and in the likelihood they understand that, they eat the treats because that is what they want. I would like to say it again. It makes me angry. The first time i ever saw this I was outraged. Everybody has to move onto new classes or a new part of the school day and I have seen many wonderful lunches thrown out. grrrr....someone kind of told me to stop it, when I was whining about this. Well, sometimes the kids buy lunch and are last in line, sometimes they chew slower, sometimes they can't get the straw into their juice box and need help, sometimes they have to go to the bathroom, get the drift? I suggest whatever way you can eek out information from your child do so, and see if there is a plan you can come up with so the food is eaten, not choked down and everyone is happy. I am afraid I didn't get support from schools, etc. so maybe you will if you are bothered enough and try to talk to someone about this. There, whew I feel a little better.

Ideally, yes, they should at least encourage eating the main courses, however I guess it depends on how big the class is and what their view is at the school.

I always get back the uneaten food and then I question my son why he didn't eat it or finish his lunch, I like it because then I can adjust what or how much I pack.
I think we always want to expect our teachers to go the extra step when it comes to our children, however realistically they can't always do that. At my son's preschool they do encourage the kids to try different foods like at snack time and during multicultural functions and holidays, so I guess I'm satisfied with that.

I would want the uneaten food left in the lunchbox just to know what they ate or didn't. When my daughter went to daycare then didn't send uneaten food home but they did put a piece of paper saying what she ate which was very helpful. That way you know if she's never eating the PB sandwich then try something else.

I wouldn't bother with a candy bar or "dessert" type item with lunch. Snacks are good but I would go with yogurt or fruit or something, so if they did only eat the snack at least it would be somewhat nutritious. I don't think kids need a candy every day at lunch. I also don't think its the lunchroom persons job to coax your child to eat the main course. It would be nice, but I'm sure they have a bunch of kids to supervise, and its probably not part of their job. Hopefully at that age you can talk to you kid about what he ate and why. And just know as long as they're getting a good breakfast and dinner at home then being picky at lunch won't hurt him.

I think it is my job as the mom to pack a lunch I think my kids will eat, and I do not put anything in there (like candy) that I think they will scarf down first, and ruin their appetite for the "real" food. I don't think it is anybody's responsibility to try and bargain with my kids to eat their lunch. Actually I would be seriously annoyed if anybody bargained with them because I just don't believe in it. I put healthy food in front of them, and if they eat it, great, and if they don't, well that's their choice. Pretty much I think the lunch room moms (at our school that is a volunteer position =) are there to keep the kids from killing each other or putting their carrot sticks up their noses, or whatever other crazy things kids think up while their teachers aren't around. If they can keep an eye out for those types of things, I'm happy!

I would definitely like any uneaten food to come back to me in the lunchbox so I know if they are eating or not. For instance, if I'm making a whole sandwich every day when a half sandwich would do just as well, then I'd like to know that so we aren't wasting food.

I would want the uneaten food returned to the lunch box so I know what my child actually did/ did not eat for lunch. Then, I could try different items next time and not pack any "junk" food which may be eaten instead of the healthier food. If I pack all "healthy" stuff then there won't be any other option. I wouldn't expect the lunch monitor to watch what my child is eating.

I worked at a small private school and the lunch aides did encourage the children to eat their "healthy" food first and all leftover food as always sent home. I really think that the aides role in encouraging the children depends on the age of the children. With younger children they often need to be reminded which choices are healthiest but with older children they should be responsible for this themselves. Also, if the leftover food is being sent home than the parent can make better choices about what to send.

I've never had any issue with my kids and their lunchtimes. They were in small private schools for several years before going into public (son through 5th grade, daughter k4-2nd) and they have always left their uneaten food in the lunchbox.
They were sometimes rushed a little, but usually the teachers just required them to eat in silence (no talking) for the first 10 minutes or something. To help ensure the kids got their food eaten. I always instructed my kids to eat the "main" part first. And if it came home uneaten, I asked why. I also have always asked what they ate, and didn't eat. Sometimes, they might trade something away, or be given something by another student. It didn't take long when they were young to establish that they ate the main part and then the rest, and I also overpack. Then, whatever they don't eat at lunch (usually something healthy) they get to eat in the car on the ride home for a "snack". :) I usually pack something "treat"ish, but healthy if I can. Like gogurts or something like that. Or they love Craisins, etc.

But, my daughter is a slow eater, and she sometimes would say that she didn't eat this or that because she ran out of time. That's not so much of a problem any more. She has just learned to eat first, and talk after, I guess. She eats almost everything in her lunch now :)

I just have my boys put their leftovers back in the box. I make it a point to only send healthy options and also to limit the portions. That way, my kids aren't eating a ridiculous amount of fruit or carbs. I figure they will eat what they have if they are hungry. If they don't eat it, then it's like we do at home....too bad.

Hi VM, I worked as a lunch lady in my kids very small Catholic school. And yes, we did see it as our job to get the kids to eat, and no, NOTHING went in the garbage except empty containers. Everything was sent back home in the lunch box. Was very much easier to give this kind of attention in a tiny Catholic school, then a public school with a couple hundred kids eating all at the same time and maybe 4 adults or less supervising.

My sister is a teacher, and she is not allowed to try to influence what the kids eat, in any way. A colleague of hers made the mistake of trying to get a child to eat the sandwich before the candy bar, and was reprimanded for it. The rest of the teachers got the message, loud and clear. So no, do not expect the teacher/aide to do anything, and choose items for the lunchbox accordingly.

As for the food coming home, I'd want to see, if possible, so I'd know what's working and what isn't. But again, I think this is something you need to discuss with your child, because the teacher isn't necessarily going to control what the child leaves in the box to bring home and what the child throws in the trash. (unless the school has a clear policy, such as Katie S mentioned below).

I agree with Denise P completely! It is totally unreasonable to expect the lunch aide to supervise what your child eats. I am sure you teach your child healthy eating and provide the healthy food at home and for school. When your child is at school you hope for the best.

Our kids are not allowed to return uneaten food to their lunch box. It is our school's policy that all uneaten food must be thrown away. I agree with this policy. I think this is one area where we as parents just have to let go a little. :)

I would hope they would "encourage" them to eat healthy, that is as far as it should go, not actually taking anything anything away, just a simple comment every so often, and not necessarily to any child in particular.

I would definitely want anything not eaten to come back home. Throwing out uneaten food is such a waste of money, assuming it is in a bag or some type of sealed container so it doesn't create a mess. I want to know if I am packing too much or if my child doesn't like something. I do pack a treat, a cookie or halloween size choc bar, granola bar with choc chips etc is fine, but the rest is healthy including a fruit or vegie.

The staff watching over lunch is not charged with checking what is being eaten, or shared, or thrown away. Children will follow rules and policies established at home.
ER