Looking for Breastfeeding Advice

Updated on December 08, 2009
A.M. asks from Chicago, IL
58 answers

Hello Moms.
Here's my dilemma. I have a beatiful new baby girl whom is about 9 weeks old. Before she was born I promised myself I would do the best I could when it came to breastfeeding. I had doubts that I would be able to or want to, but once she was born and I start I knew how important it was and what a benefit to her and myself for continuing. My goal was to breastfeed till at least 6 months. Everything had been going great with the process itself...a few clogged ducts, but all in all I really enjoyed the gassy and screaming in pain after everyfeeding. She had no bleeding or vomiting so I chalked it up to colic. It got worse and worse. The doctor (covering for mine) said there was nothing we could do she would outgrow it. But I still felt there was something wrong with my milk. I cut everything out of my diet and nothing helped. WE went through this screaming for a month and finally took it upon ourselves to put her on Nutramegen for 48 hours. She had been supplemented here and there with regular formula. Anyway, amazingly she was a whole different baby, no pain, no crying.
The doctors came to the conclusion she has a protein sensitvity to milk...not an allergy.
They said I could mimic the formula if I went on a strict no milk diet...a very strict, no whey, not milk products, pretty much a vegan type diet....but worse.
They said 2 months has given her a good base, but I feel horrible quitting breastfeeding. Here's my question..would your advice be to go on this diet or do you think 2 months is good. I wouldn't be able to eat out or eat normal food for the holidays...or for the remainder of breastfeeding.
Just looking for advice or opinions on what others would do.

Thanks!

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So What Happened?

Thanks to everyone who gave me advice on wether or not to stop breastfeeding due to my 9week old's protein sensitivity. A lot, if not all of the advice about gas drops, breast milk from a bottle, no dairy diet, eliminating caffeine, checking my let down, etc, I had tried. The Nutramegen was an absolute last resort. I had researched everything first.
I haven't made an absolute decision yet on how to procede. I keep pumping and limiting foods, but still have her on the formula. It's only been 4 days. I am a true proponent of breastfeeding and I will sacrifice anything for my child, but first and foremost I believe I shouldn't put her through pain while I figure it out or force her to "outgrow" her sensitivity. Watching tears roll down her face for hours is the worst gut wrenching pain for me. Now she smiles, sleeps, and is able to swallow with out pain...And right at the moment that seems the most important thing.
I am researching food options and will decide in the next couple days how to procede. I know for me I need to maintain my weight and stay healthy for my child (currently I have already dropped below my pp weight for eliminating so many foods).
I greatly appreciate all the advice, all which I feel is very positive! Thank you again..you are all wonderful mom's!

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R.M.

answers from Chicago on

If I were you I'd just stick with the formula for now on. Who know's if the diet would even work and that's a very strict diet. I don't think I would try it.

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E.M.

answers from Chicago on

I breastfed my son for 6-months and it was very difficult (not enough milk, I couldn't take medication that I need, etc...). I decided not to breastfeed my daughter and was feeling pretty guilty about it. This article helped me: http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200904/case-against-breast....

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S.L.

answers from Chicago on

Don't stress. My daughters are adopted and never breast fed. In fact, I have no idea if they ever even got good formula as I was told that one of them got milk powder with sugar. Hmmmm. Doesn't sound very nutrious. Both are thriving. They are in the top of their class, in fact, the youngest who got the milk powder, taught herself to read in kindergarten and is reading several grades above her actual level. They rarely get sick and when they do, it's usually very short lived. Both are very athletic.

Do what will make you both comfortable. It will be fine.

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

Hi A. - If I were in your shoes, this is what I would do. I would pick the option that nourished my child AND kept me sane as a mother. And, in this case it would be stopping the breastfeeding. I had to make a similar and agonizing decision with my first child. I had a choice - continue to be a raving lunatic who felt completely mentally unbalanced, not to mention it was hard to even enjoy being a mother because my poor child was so upset all the time and I felt like a failure OR make a decision to feed something to my child that he could tolerate and we could both be happy and content with our decision.

I was an idiot for a long time. I kept listening to those "oh my gosh you HAVE to breastfeed your child or your baby will be poisoned!" types instead of assessing what was best for my child and my mental health. Once I quit listening to what everyone else had to say and focused on my OWN UNIQUE situation, I made a choice that greatly benefited everyone involved. And, I'm happy to say that my son (now nearly 3) has not grown a tail, is not obese, is not lacking developmentally, and is was happier since we switched him to formula. He now tolerates all different types of foods (he'd rather eat vegetables than anything else, go figure!).

Ultimately the choice is yours and yours alone. If it makes sense to you to continue to breastfeed while altering your diet - and you feel physically and emotionally good about your decision and your child is doing fine - then go that route. But there is no need to beat yourself up over the decision to formula feed your child, especially if it would be best for both of you.

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M.V.

answers from Rockford on

Hi A.,

Are you feeding your little one the Rx Nutramegen or the OTC? The OTC also has milk protein, but its prob. not enough to make her colicky.

My son is 7 weeks old and has an allergy to milk and soy. We noticed it around 2-3 weeks. After seeing a pediatric GI I've decided to continue breastfeeding. In the beginning it was very overwhelming to say the least. But it does get better! I felt the same way about the holidays but was able to have a dairy and soy free Thanksgiving. Eating vegan was not even and option to me b/c soy protein is in everything!

I was able to find help in the book "The Milk Soy Protein Intolerance (MSPI) Guidebook/Cookbook" This has helped me a lot, I also have a lot of other research items I can send you if you chose to continue to breastfeed.

Again I'll say I know that this can be tough, but it does get better. But I understand the stress this can cause you. So remember its your choice! If you want to stop BF than go for it, if you want to continue kudos to you! There is no wrong answer. I had to realize this, I had this feeling that I was going to let my little one down if I stopped BF. It took me and my husband to sit down and talk about it and he pointed it out that I wouldn't be letting him down. A healthy Mommy is the best Mommy, and that physically and psychologically.

I can't tell you how much I want ice cream or even a glass of milk! But in the end I know its b/c I'm not to have these things. The way I think of it is this way. i was able to not eat or drink a lot of my favorite things when I was pregnant. Now I have to do the same just with different foods. If you plan on BF for 6 months, you only have 4 months to go! But don't pressure yourself. You have the right to do what you please. No matter what it is, as long as you're happy with it is all that matters. Your baby is not going to hate you, or even remember!

Hope this helps, and good luck!
M

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D.B.

answers from Chicago on

Don't feel bad about stopping. No one should push you in to continuing to breast feed. There are plenty of woman out there that will tell you to do whatever you have to do to keep going, but it really is okay to stop. You could go on this diet and your baby still may not respond. Not to mention the stress this is going to cause you. Stress on a mom causes more harm to a baby than being bottle fed. Be happy that you found a formula that makes your baby happy. This should be your number 1 goal.

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M.M.

answers from Chicago on

Congratulations on making it 9 weeks! Breastfeeding is hard and that is a big accomplishment. Remember that a healthy baby needs a healthy and sane mom, and doing this diet with the stress of the holidays and having a young baby could make you really stressed out and unhappy. You need to be happy and sane too or you won't be a good mom, so don't feel guilty if you have to give up breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is a wonderful thing and you've done it for 9 weeks, but don't beat yourself up if you are giving it up earlier than planned. You are still a good mom and will still have a happy and healthy child, which is most important.

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N.J.

answers from Chicago on

I feel your pain about giving up breastfeeding. I really believe you have done the best you can. I am extremely pro-breastfeeding but sometimes when certain illnesses are involved it can become impossible or unhealthy for you or the baby. My cousin had lupus and didn't know it and she kept trying to breastfeed her baby and her milk never came in and she had all kinds of problems and she finally gave in and put him on formula. I would have your new baby tested for which specific protein she is intolerant to because it could be something more serious. Many states do not have all the available tests for new babies with metabolic disorders and if they aren't careful a baby could die. I am not trying to scare you but I would just get tested to be sure. Good luck and you are a great mom whether or not you decide to continue breastfeeding.

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W.M.

answers from Chicago on

I just want to say that many very happy healthy and bright children (and adults) were formula fed. Although I have nursed my children for around a year, I don't like to hear people being made to feel guilty if they don't. That said, I believe if you are happy you will be a better parent. If the crazy diet will be stressful for you, and your daughter is happy on formula, then I would switch to formula. Good luck in whatever decision you make, and don't feel guilty either way.

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

Hi A..
You sound like an awesome mother. Kuddos to you for making it this far! I believe in breast feeding and all of its wonderful benefits and I am hoping to make it 1 year with my son, however, there are situations that may make this impossible for some. Your situation sounds like one of those times. You need to do what you think is best. Either way, please know that you are a great mom and your little girl will know that one day:)

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C.W.

answers from Chicago on

I can relate - with my first I breastfed til she was 8 months old, but with my 2nd my milk supply basically dried up on its own before she was 4 months old. I think it's honorable that you have done your best for your little girl, but know that there are plenty of healthy formula-fed babies out there and don't feel bad about it - sometimes it is just how it's meant to be. Good luck and enjoy your baby!

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T.B.

answers from Chicago on

I think the new formula sounds great, and that your child will do better if you're not feeling stressed and guilty about breastfeeding. I managed 10 months with each of my kids, so I'm not at all anti-breastfeeding, but it's best to do what works for your family, instead of trying to prove that you can stick it out. Good luck!

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R.P.

answers from Chicago on

A., you are an AMAZING mom. Just asking this means you care about your child and her welfare. What is your instinct telling you? Whatever decision you make will be the right one. Trust in that. You've given her 2 months of nursing. Even if it were two days, that's wonderful! You are supported in whatever direction you want to take with this. Good luck, R

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V.C.

answers from Chicago on

A. M
I'm so sorry you went thru that. Please don't beat yourself up you did the best you could and thankfully your Mothers intuition kicked in and you stopped! she will be perfectly fine if you don't nurse her. I so wanted to nurse my Daughter for at least a year if not longer, she weaned herself at 6 months, she is a happy, healthy 5 year old now.
Don't put yourself thru that.
Good Luck
V.

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L.A.

answers from Chicago on

I just wanted to add that I breastfed my oldest for 3 months, and although that was only a short time, she is the healthiest of us all. When I had my twins, I developed a heart issue and had to be put on 2 meds, so at 2 weeks I had to abruptly stop breastfeeding. I was very sad about this, but I had to take care of myself in order to be around to take care of my kids.

There is guilt in everything we do as parents. It never goes away. If it is going to be harder on you to maintain that diet, then you will be unhappy which in turn will effect your child. Do what you feel is best for your family.

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C.G.

answers from Chicago on

A., do not feel guilty. You gave it your best shot. Your daughter and You will both be happier on formula. They make wonderful formaula that is so close to breast milk that it is not worth putting yourself through the stress. Enjoy your baby! DOnt spend this precious time that flies by stressed, hungry and not enjoying every minute.

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M.H.

answers from Chicago on

A., you have to look into yourself and decide what you are willing to do. Its not any easy choice for you, obviously. I am 100% pro-nursing, LOVED every second of my experience nursing my kids, and feel good about what I was able to do for them and for me. That said, its not always a win/win. If its going to cause you resentment, extra work, stress,whatever to continue its really up to you to decide if it is worth continuing. You have done great things for your daughter already in the last 9 weeks.
Look deep, and if you decide to continue, leave an opening to re-evaluate as time passes. If you decide to stop, release yourself from the guilt, its not worth it to torture yourself.
Good luck to you all, I really wish you the best in you future with your little girl!

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J.K.

answers from Chicago on

Dear A.,

Your story sounds just like mine, except I'd already successfully breastfed two children! My youngest, a boy, is almost 3. I breastfed his two older sisters for almost 12 months each -- 6 months exclusively, then w/ some foods introduced. The girls were happy and healthy with no tummy troubles ever. The boy was miserable. I was miserable from no sleep and all the crying. My other kids were miserable. I kept going to the doctor, and they didn't find anything wrong. We tried Nutramigen -- he was a new person within 12 hours. In some ways I was/am really happy that it was so obvious, because it made it much easier for me to decide to stop nursing. Nutramigen is really expensive, but if you have a flexible spending account for health care, you can get reimbursed for the nutramigen if you submit the receipts w/ a note from your pediatrician. Chances are very good that your baby will have some food allergies, so I recommed going to a pediatric allergist around 6 mos to do some testing. We were pleased with the decision to go w/ the Nutramigen.

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S.A.

answers from Chicago on

I bf my son and do with my daughter and I consider myself to be a proponent for it. However, I also feel that if you feel that you would be unhappy being on such a strict diet, then it's okay to stop. Don't beat yourself up. Bf is difficult. When we thought my daughter might have a milk allergy, I told myself I was done if that was the case. I knew that I would not be happy with that diet. And the saying is SO true, "If Mama aint happy, aint nobody happy!"

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V.H.

answers from Chicago on

I went through the same thing as you with my oldest daughter. The symptoms were the same although she did turn out to have a milk protein allergy (she is now almost 6 and still allergic to milk).

If you can eliminate all milk protein from your diet to continue breastfeeding more power to you. Milk proteins are found in things that you would never think milk is in. For example, Chicken nuggets, bread, hot dogs, bacon, lunchmeats etc. Not only do you have to look out for Milk in the description you should remove things such as Sodium Lactate, Lactalyte, Lactaglobin, etc. Anything with Lactate in the forefrnt is a milk protein. There are many great substiutes out there but you will have to shop at Trader Joes or Whole Foods. You have to be very diligent on reading labels.

If I were to do it all over again I would of put my daughter on the formula earlier than pushing through the breastfeeding. As soon as I gave her that bottle of formula she was a different child. She slept, she didn't cry after eating, her skin cleared up and I felt better knowing she was happy.

Good luck on your decision.

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P.D.

answers from Chicago on

A.:

You must do what is best for you and your family.

warmly,

P., RLC, IBCLC
Breastfeeding and Parenting Solutions

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C.M.

answers from Chicago on

I'm all for breastfeeding, but not at the expense of a normal life. A relaxed, comfortable, confident mother is the most important thing.

You just need to eat a normal, healthy diet. You daughter will do great with formula.

You will be making enough sacrifices as a mother. No need to feel guilty about "quitting". You tried, it didn't work out, no big deal. Just enjoy your precious angel.

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T.S.

answers from Chicago on

A., first off, congratulations on your beautiful baby girl.

My BTDT mom advice is, go with your instinct. Do what is right for you and your little girl. Breastfeeding is a wonderful thing, but it should be a great experience for you both. Don't feel guilty if you have to stop. Know that you did something special with and for your daughter. But you shouldn't be so stressed over it. Enjoy the holidays with your family. :)

I breastfed both daughter until she was 10 mos. and had to stop because of being a high risk pregnancy with my son. And I BF my son until he was 18 mos. I think BF is wonderful for ANY amount of time you can manage. You know what's best for you and your daughter... the most important thing is that you're both happy. She will be fine on formula, as so many children are. It's not what goes into their bellies, it's how you nurture them as they grow that makes children exceptional.

Best wishes for a beatiful and stress-free holiday season.
T.
Mom to a 5 & 4 year old, and one due in Jan.'10

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T.L.

answers from Chicago on

well that is up to you. would i do that yes. I was a vegan for a period of time and honestly you adapt quickly. there are great substitutes for everything! Now there is even coconut milk that is delicious as ice cream and the yogurt is BETTER than the dairy stuff. Drink vanilla almond milk. you may find butter doesnt bother her but if it does there are all sorts of spreads out there. The only substitute I have never found to be just right for a dairy product is the cheese substitutes. We may sacrifices for our children all the time. It isnt permanent, it is a short period of your life that you will be inconvenienced. I am not going to continue and tell you how great breastmilk is and stop being selfish as you know all that and in the end have to make your choice and only you can do that since you will live with the consequences of your actions either way you go with it. A few things though to keep in mind if cutting out the dairy ends up not working. First I recommend you go see a La Leche League or another breastfeeding group for assistance. This could also be a foremilk hind milk imbalance, wheat sensitivity, many many things so check out kellymom.com at the minimum for additional info. I know its hard during the holidays, but you have many more holidays to enjoy and this will be your only chance to nurse your baby. I see too many moms regret their choices later so make sure you are secure with your choice! Good luck and I hope breastfeeding starts to become a fabulous experience for you soon!

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J.H.

answers from Chicago on

Hmm as I believe another mother mentioned my children reacted the same way, with my daughter I did as you are and cut out almost everything and she still had issues until I switched her to a bottle. Not formula but expressed breast milk from a bottle and she did better. When my son started acting the same way I was upset and talked with their pediatrician(different from who I was seeng with the first) and he said it sounded like reflux, put my son on childrens zantac and almost overnight the problems stopped and he was able to breastfeed normaly and I was was able to eat somewhat normaly( I still watched my dairy intake just to be safe)

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D.C.

answers from Chicago on

Hi A.,
I went through something similar with my son, who is my second. I breastfed my daughter with no problems so I couldn't understand why my son was having issues. Well, all children are different so I had to try something different. I am a huge dairy fan so I knew it would be hard to completely take it out of my diet. So I took "conventional" dairy out of my system and we have switched to raw dairy. "Conventional" dairy products are pasteurized and preserved so much that the natural enzymes our bodies are made to digest are basically eliminated and thus people are labeled lactose intolerant or have an allergy/sensitivity. Anyway, our whole family drinks raw milk, raw goat's milk (which is the closest substitute for breastmilk), raw cheese, raw butter, etc. You don't have to sacrifice if you are able to buy the products in their natural form. You do need to belong to a co-op to obtain these products so if you are interested, please email me offline.
Other things I learned during this process - sometimes their digestive tract just needs time to mature and adapt to the foods we eat; I also started take Probiotics to help increase the natural enzymes which would then help him process the breastmilk; I slept skin-to-skin with him for a few weeks to help soothe him through this transition; my husband is a chiropractor so he received regular adjustments; I tried nursing him upright as much as possible to decrease heavy milk flow or oversupply, which also could have added to his discomfort. All these things were just added benefits to my health anyway so I didn't feel I was sacrificing but starting my son off with a healthy lifestyle. He responded very quickly and now is a happy, "chunky monkey" at 5 months (no one can believe he is exclusively breastfed)! Support is your best friend during these times so please email me if you have any other questions, or just need to vent/cry, etc.
Good luck!
D.

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P.P.

answers from Chicago on

Congratulations on breastfeeding for two months, that's a major accomplishment, especially if you had a fussy baby. The benefits she gained from that are wonderful. Continuing with the nursing would give your baby many more benefits, such as immunities against colds, ear infections, and the flu, as well as providing comfort and nutrition. There are also benefits that you will receive as a nursing mother.
Now, that being said, diet restrictions are always difficult, especially around the holidays. A non-dairy diet is particularly difficult, since the standard American diet is so dependent upon dairy. As a former vegan who is now vegetarian, I know the difficulties, especially when eating out.
You need to weigh your options and listen to your heart. It's telling you what you should do. If your goal is 6 months and you're two months in, you're already a third of the way there. On the other hand, it's no fun being a new mother if you're miserable.
Good luck. Your baby has already gained so much from the wonderful gift of breastfeeding you have given her.

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L.H.

answers from Chicago on

I had similar issues and resolved it like this--when I put her on soy she was so happy...when she breastfed, not so happy. My doctor said I gave her the immunities, and I did NOT feel guilty. By the way, whe may be sensitive to other dairy products as she gets older, so watch out.

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E.K.

answers from Chicago on

Hi there - I know you've gotten a lot of replies already, but just wanted to tell you my story. I had the same issue! My little guy had blood in his stool, it was so bad...eee. But, the good news is that I really worked hard to cut out ALL dairy, which I admit, was more difficult than I thought (for example, there's whey in a LOT of stuff, like bread!), but once I got the hang of it (i.e., almond milk - since about 1/2 of kiddos with this have a soy problem too - so I cut out soy too, and no dairy, not even in baked goods, etc.), it wasn't too bad! At about 12 months I slowly added soy, then dairy to my diet...and lo and behold, he had grown out of it. Now, at 20 months he's a milk fanatic (ha).

My point is, it IS do-able. It's not super-easy, but two things to mention (one practical and one that may not apply to you at all): (1) it's SO much cheaper to try the diet than the formula - we saved about $2000 over that year - the Nutramigen is EXPENSIVE; and (2) i actually lost ALL my pregnancy weight from dairy free, seriously. ;-)

It's totally up to you, I don't want to say that changing to formula is bad because it's not at all - but wanted to tell you my story. Hope this helps in making your final decision.

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J.W.

answers from Chicago on

A.,

I hate to tell you it is all or nothing when it comes to following a strict no dairy/milk diet. However, it is super easy to adapt, but you do have to learn how to read your labels for milk proteins aka, sodium caseniate, casein, lactose, etc... so many people think they will get weak bones and such from not eating dairy, which is quite the contrary...(we do all of our bone building by the time we are 25yrs old, so if we didn't do it during our youth, then not much we can do to reverse or make up for it...)

I follow a gluten free/soy free/dairy free diet. I did dabble with dairy here and there, but my daughter had a reaction to it, so I didn't do it. There is great info out there on how to substitute dairy into baking and your diet.

So Delicious makes a great coconut milk ice cream, yogurt and half gallon milks. It is all tastey. Trader Joe's sells the cheapest organic rice milk for $1.99 per half gallon. I'd be careful of soy as it is a bean and can be harder to digest so if you don't do much of soy, then just avoid it. It may be hard around the holidays, but you will be fine. It is a such small phase in your life.

Reason why I say continue breastfeeding is to least get through the cold and flu/H1N1 flu season, your antibodies that are provided in your milk cannot be duplicated in formula. You will build the immunity she needs for the rest of your life. She'll get sick less often later in life.

Also, the thing you should be adding is probiotics to your diet with a supplement. Since most probiotics are cultured in dairy, Pure Encapsulation makes it cultured in soy. Of course, coconut milk yogurt has natural probiotics in them as well. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends at least 6m.

There is a good book called Is This My Child? By Dr. Dorris Rapp, www.drrapp.com she talks about food sensitivities in babies, kids and adults. There are clues to how you know your baby is sensitive to certain foods. Was she a super active baby? Did she kick you so hard it hurt? These are just a few she names in her book.

I hope some of this helps. I was there too, kept telling myself, I'm going to do this for 6m, I made it, then said 8m, made it then said 12m, she walked away 2wks before her first bday, I let her decide and it all worked out. We supplemented with Nutragimen when needed too as she was super sensitive to milk proteins and didn't introduce cheese until 18m, she is fine with it, but we do rice and coconut milk blend.

Good Luck
J. W. MPH
Maternal and Child Health Educator
Chicago Examiner Family Health Expert
Speaking on Infant Nutrition (6m-12m) at Giggle at 2116 N. Halsted on Wednesday, December 9 at 7pm

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T.C.

answers from Bloomington on

No-one can tell you what to do, A.. This is such a personal decision and a very extreme situation. It is a lot to ask of yourself, but if you feel you want to try it you should give it a go. Maybe you could try for two weeks and see how it goes? Best of luck, whatever you decide :O)

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S.D.

answers from Chicago on

I had to completely give up dairy in the beginning when I was breastfeeding my son. at first it was really hard (and honestly it never got "easy") but it was worth it to me. I was not happy about it, every time my husband would ask what we were having for dinner I would respond "I don't know, I am just eating to live" because I felt like I couldn't enjoy anything as I loved dairy. I too had to make sure I didn't eat anything with whey or cassin or any dairy in it. I can tell you that I found a ton of stuff at whole foods (they have a whole dessert section that's vegan) and founda lot of ways to get around it- making mashed potatoes for the holidays without dairy, etc. I think it was totally worth it. after a couple of months, my son was much better and I was able to breastfeed for 15 months, at around 6 months I could add dairy back in. I also lost all my baby weight plus which was a nice benefit for having to give up the diary. the way I looked at it was this- our whole lives we will be giving up stuff for our children and as parents, we knew we would be making sacrifices when we had children- so what's a few months without something? I think if you could get to six months you would feel really rewarded, although if you can't 9 weeks is definitely better than not doing it at all. some other things I ate during that time- chili, peanut butter, lunchmeat sandwiches, dried fruit, goats milk yogurt (really tasty, the proteins are different in the goats milk), lots of vegan stuff. It really wasn't bad and I am glad I did it.

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J.K.

answers from Chicago on

A., that's one of those questions you have to answer yourself! I went through a similar experience (taking various foods out of my diet) for about six months, and the milk one was particulary difficult. Whatever you decide, and if your daughter is truly allergic to dairy, you will have a new set of challenges as she begins to eat solids.

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R.C.

answers from Chicago on

A., my daughter and I had the same problem but I further complicated matters worse as I could not produce enough milk, per feeding. She was always gassy and we tried everything from diet change, soy formula that we ultimately ended with Nutramegen which relieved alot of the gas pressure. I never stopped breastfeeding though because I wanted to contribute to her health as much as possible, plus it really helps you with bonding and good quiet or down time.

I found "Little Tummies" which are gas drops for infants to be a miracle as it helped to relieve the gas instantly and it is safe for infants. You can find it at any drugstore, Walmart and Target. I found it the most economical at Walmart as I keep it on hand, like it was a household staple. It worked perfectly and you can use drops as needed or before feedings without fear of feeling your over medicating your daughter. Look in the section of gas medicine for children, it is definitely a better choice to relieve gas.

My daughter was free from colds and ear infections until pre-k and I honestly believe it was due to my breastfeeding, although it was not at 100% for her nutrition. I may have supplied her 30% of her intake and we breastfeed until she was 1yrs old.

Best wishes to you, you will get past this.

R.

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J.S.

answers from Chicago on

I had to completely give up dairy and soy (and soy is unbelievably in tons of products) when breastfeeding. Everything I read said the sensitivity lasts until about 4 months of age, and sure enough, when I tried re-introducing dairy when my daughter was 4 months, no problem at all. So you may only need to do it for two months. Given that it's cold and flu season, I'd say to just suck it up and do it for a couple of months. I know it sucks, and your diet sounds much more restrictive than mine was, but would you rather do that, or spend nights up with a screaming baby who gets sick several times this winter?

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A.S.

answers from Chicago on

Hi A.,

I know how you feel on the giving up dairy side of things- my son is allergic to milk protein and we just found out at 10 months old. He is now 14 months and I'm still nursing (I want to see if/when he'll wean himself- easy to do since I stay at home), so I'm still on a dairy free diet. I have to say, when I found out I had to eliminate all milk products, I felt so unbelievably alone. But for me, I'll do whatever it takes to help my son. And there are so many resources out there. Yes, the holidays will be different. But you'd be surprised what you can still have and what substitutes are out there. We use rice milk for meals and breakfast, coconut milk can be used for baking, fleishman's LIGHT butter sticks are a godsend. I agree with another person- there really is no cheese substitute (and I do MISS my cheese!). There is a rice milk whip cream for those pies! Coconut milk ice cream from Jewel is really good. Whole Foods and Trader Joes are great places to wander and find tons of stuff. I also thought I'd share this website- http://www.godairyfree.org/ There's even a whole eating out section! The author of that website has a fantastic book- Go Dairy Free that has been a wonderful resource for me. She offers lots of suggestions on substitutes and ways to make similar foods to what we're used to. Perhaps put it on your xmas list!

But do what you're comfortable with. Just thought I'd remind you, you're not alone and there really are things out there- so many more things now than ever before!

Good luck and Happy Holidays! Congrats on your new little one- enjoy this first Christmas!
A. :)

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S.M.

answers from Chicago on

You are a wonderful mama! You have given your child a gift for two months, one that many children never recieve.

If the diet is going to stress you out and cause you misery, its time to stop breastfeeding. No guilt, give yourself permission. Its Okay. The stress of it will only make the whole process miserable, something which can be a very lovely thing, you don't want to make it an awful process that makes you only remember how awful it was those first few months of her life. You want to remember how she smells and her eyes looking at you. You want to relish in the good moments.

I am an experienced breastfeeding mom, and I can tell you with my second, I nearly stopped in the first three months because it was incredibly h*** o* me. It is okay to have those feelings, and it is okay to say you know what, I am not enjoying this, she is not enjoying this. Its time to be done.

That being said, it may get easier in a few months as other moms have indicated. It may not. The choice really lies on your health and well being. Are you going to be okay on the vegan diet - as okay as she is on the formula? You are NOT giving up! You are making a choice for the benefit and well being of your family. No negativity. Its hard enough being a new mom and restructuring your life. It is. Enjoy this precious time as much as you can.

Love to you.
S.
Mom to Fae and Nora.

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A.A.

answers from Chicago on

A. M. I am also an A. M!

I have a 5 year old, 3 year old and 3 month old. I breastfed the two older ones for 1 year and I am exclusively breastfeeding my youngest. I can understand where you are coming from because my first child reacted very much like yours when I nursed him.He had colic and reflux...a lot of screaming! It was heartbreaking at times, but for me, I just committed to nursing and did what it took to make it work. I stopped all milk products! But it was so worth it to me! I can't understand wanting to give up nursing personally, but I know it is a normal reaction to have when you are going through what you are. It doesn't make you a bad mom and in fact it sounds like you are a good mom because you are really weighing your options. As moms we need to trust our instincts. If you have faith in God than go to him and talk to him about it.He cares what you are going through! I did a lot of praying in the middle of the night back then! If not, than do what you feel is best. If you are content with your choice (the one you made because it was YOUR choice not anyway else's!) than you will be much happier.

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J.T.

answers from Chicago on

I think the stress alone is probably not healthy for a new mom. It's great you want to go this far with it, but don't let it cost you your own health. You have a newborn to take care of but you also need to take care of yourself or you will be no use to her under so much stress. If there is a formula out there that she can handle it is probably in her best interest rather than putting your health on the line. Best of luck!

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M.H.

answers from Chicago on

Two months is plenty of breastfeeding as far as passing on immunity and such. It's nice to be able to bond with baby by breastfeeding, but you can cuddle and snuggle just as much with a bottle fed baby. The important thing is that baby is fed, comfortable, and growing, not where the food comes from. BTW, breast fed both my girls, 4 months for the first one and 2 months on the second.
Good luck to you! Enjoy your baby.

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R.A.

answers from Chicago on

My daughter was fussy until 12 weeks old, gassy and farts. I did not change my diet. She was just a fussy baby. She is 7 months now and I am so grateful to still be BF. It is very rewarding, not to mention easy on the pocket book when my husband was laid off work. Good luck on what you decide..try mylacon before giving up?

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A.H.

answers from Chicago on

How long is she latching on for? I went through an almost exact situation with my son. He cried ALL the time, refused to sleep, seemed to be having tons of gas pain and greenish poop. I tried gas drops (which did help a LOT), I got a carrier for in the house so that he could sleep more upright. Eventually, we tried the test - 1 week on formula, while I pumped. He was a totally different baby. Happy, starting to sleep better, etc. We went back on the breastmilk and his poop turned green again. He was gassy and miserable and I just cried and cried over it. We ended up bailing. We'd gotten him through the initial immunity-boosting and we switched to formula.

Later, I found out the real problem - he wasn't getting the "hind milk", or the last stage of milk they get in the breastfeeding session. My son would fall asleep in my arms before getting it and I didn't know to keep him awake while feeding.

I breastfed again, with my daughter, to entirely different results. Armed with this new knowledge I managed to feed her (with supplementation) all the way through 18 months, when we were down to just a bedtime feeding and she weaned. It was hard in the beginning, waking her up to keep her feeding, but it worked. I had trouble with making enough milk, so we'd top her off with formula after I'd gotten as much as I could into her. We had some stretches where we didn't need to supplement at all, especially after cereal was introduced.

It's possible that this isn't the problem, but your post sounded very familiar to me, so I thought I'd mention it. I'm not sure how long it's supposed to be (although I seem to recall it being around 10-15 minutes per breast minimum) but you might try keeping her on longer during a feeding, waking her up if she falls asleep. There's a chance that she's just not getting that last stage of milk that helps settle her tummy and prevent the gassiness.

Good luck!

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K.R.

answers from Chicago on

A.,
I would recommend you contact a Lactation Consultant. You may be correct in your diagnosis, but it could also be caused by *how* you're breastfeeding, not always *what* is in the milk. There are also other ways to try dealing with food proteins passing through the milk than just by eliminating the food. It might be possible for you to take a medication that helps your body more thoroughly digest the food so that the protein that comes through the milk is in a more elemental form, just like what's in the Nutramigen. I think it's worth checking out these other options with an experienced LC before making a final decision.
K. R. IBCLC

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S.B.

answers from Chicago on

2 months is good! Don't beat yourself up about it!

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J.C.

answers from Chicago on

i'd go back to breastfeeding with small diet changes i.e. eat whatever you were eating all along...don't try new foods right now :) foods themselves do not pass into breastmilk—that's a misconception perpetuated in our society that makes us feel like its our fault!! not so...unfortunately a baby comes to us with an undeveloped digestive system so that is usially what is misdiagnosed as an allergy or inability to tolerate...whatever the label they give.
go back and do only breastmilk and see that you have a good latch you may be pleasantly surprised...my oldest also did the screaming thing but thankfully i had a wonderful lactation consultant that was also a naturopath help me thru lots of nutritional education as well as breastfeeding help!
some other helpful info; avoid caffeine—it dries up your milk as does sage, so avoid gramdmas stuffing! :)
other than that eat eat eat & drink drink drink!!! even a good hops beer will give you lots of milk...but not oo much, since alcohol will pass thru!
best of luck in whatever you do—just remember its always your body, your baby, your choice!! let go of the mommy guilt the sooner the better ;)

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S.H.

answers from Hartford on

I cut out milk and other potential gas-inducing foods from my diet. It seems like a big deal at the time and at first it can be a little challenging to find a tasty snack, but it really is no big deal once you get use to it. Rice milk worked out as a great alternative for me - and I can't say that I have ever felt like I couldn't eat out or eat junk food once in a while...its actually a good practice to take a few moments to think about what ingredients go into our food.

I was surprised to learn how cow's milk actually inhibits our bodies absorption of calcium because you need a balance of magnesium, calcium and vitamin D - and cow's milk is too calcium-heavy. There is a lot to be said about the health benefits of a vegan diet; however, make sure you get your B-12 and iron if you go strictly vegan (no meat). Good luck.

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A.A.

answers from Chicago on

Hi A. - I know you have received a lot of advice already, but, just want to give you a little more support. My son was born very premature and we found out he had a dairy allergy at 2 wks. I did not have the chance to breast feed right away because of his allergy (and had not developed the sucking ability), but, was also given the option of maintaining a dairy free diet or putting him on a nutramigen-like formula. We actually had to order his formula on-line, it was Neocate. Anyway, after trying a dairy free diet for a week or so, it was so hard and the nurses told me not to feel bad for not wanting to continue. I did feel bad because people had told me it was not that hard to do...anyway...long story short, my son was on nutramigen and neocate until he was 12 mos, is now 19 mos and completely healthy and happy. People even tell me what a "big" boy he is. I just smile to myself because it reaffirms my decision!!
Good luck!!

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D.B.

answers from Chicago on

I am a mom of 3 and I didn't even try breastfeeding my first two and they both had intolerance to milk proteins and were on Nutramegin. When my third came along I knew it was my last chance to try it so I did. I breastfed my third for 12 months. I beat myself up constantly thinking maybe my first two missed out on something but now they are 9, 7 and 4 and are all very smart, happy and healthy. I am very close to all three of my children. My 9 year old is in merit classes and my 7 year old is in the top of her class. Point is I am glad I got a chance to breastfeed my last one but I don't think he is better off because I did. I applaud you for at least trying with your first born. You have to do what is best for you and your baby. Hope this helped.

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K.

answers from Chicago on

What about cutting out milk most of the time, and pumping and dumping and using formula for the feedings after you have had dairy? I guess I'm suggesting that you may or may not find cutting dairy out to be a big deal. You might want to give it a shot for a couple weeks and see how it goes - that way you can make a decision based on how you are feeling and how your baby is doing. It's nice to have the extra immune protection during the cold/flu season for newborns, so if it's not too awful I'd try and keep nursing.

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K.B.

answers from Chicago on

Hi-in all my years as a pediatric nurse, I have never heard of being able to take the "milk sensitivity" out of breastmilk. I may be wrong, but I suspect your baby may have an actual allergy or extreme hypersensitivity to milk protein, and your only two options may be this incredibly demanding overhaul to your diet (and at holiday time it really sucks!) or consider trying your baby on soy-based formula. I don't want to discourage anyone from breastfeeding, and the choice is yours. I do know that most new moms don't even try to breastfeed at all, and I'm proud of you for doing so! Have a wonderful holiday!

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J.

answers from Chicago on

Hi A.,
This sounds like what I went though. I'll spare you all the details but my daughter had a sensitivity to the growth hormones in milk. I switched to organic and all the gas and pain went away. I was able to breastfeed her for 13 months and at around 2 the sensitivity started to disappear. I still use hormone free milk, usually Oberweis. hoping maybe this change will work for you too. I also did an elimination diet and it was really not fun.

best of luck,
J.

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H.S.

answers from Chicago on

I'm curious how fast your milk comes out? My letdown was so strong that my daughter was choking and gulping as she nursed. This caused her to get a lot of gas. We used the gas drops ALOT, and this gave her relief. Then I learned about my letdown and would have her get it started and then turn it into a cloth diaper until it slowed down. That helped things tremendously. Your daughter may have done better on the formula just because it came out of the bottle much slower. Does it hurt when the letdown happens? That's one big sign that it's too powerful. Or take her off right at letdown and see how hard it sprays. Some women's can shoot across the room. Mine could go about 3-4 ft out. I hope that's it, because it is very easy to deal with. Congrats and keep going mama! :)

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J.L.

answers from Chicago on

DON'T FEEL GUILTY!!!!!!! I used Nutramigen for both my kids and it is amazing the difference...no pain and peace for Mommy! You are not a failure and do not feel bad at all!!!!

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M.G.

answers from Chicago on

A.,

This is definitely a tough sacrifice to make for your baby, but so worth it! I had to give up milk for a little bit while my son was being tested for allergies. It was ni picnic, but I didn't mind it at all, knowing I was giving my baby what was best for him. If you are willing to cut out the milk for your baby, it will so beneficial. However, if you choose to stop, do not beat yourself up for it, and don't let anyone else judge you for it.

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J.M.

answers from Chicago on

Babies swollow differently when bottle feeding/breast feeding, it could be as simple as latching on differently. (swollowing too much air) Talk to the women at the La leche League. they can help. Best Wishes and Congratulations!

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B.S.

answers from Chicago on

Hi A.,
Here is my thoughts on this and I see that you have received several so I am not sure if someone else said the same. I don't think it has to be one way or the other. While you are eating as the dr. recommended breastfeed her and pump as much as you can. And during the holidays when you want to eat a little more freely provide your daughter with the formula. I know breastfeeding is a lot of work but it sounds you want to give it a try a little longer but not too thrilled about your restrictions. So maybe don't think of it as only one way or the other. Good luck and do what you feel most comfortable with.

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M.A.

answers from Chicago on

Do the diet--it's not forever. And it's no where near vegan--just cutting out dairy and processed foods that contain milk products. It could be much, MUCH worse. However, the holiday foods will suck--I'll give you that one! It's a small, if uncomfortable, sacrifice to make. I'm surprised to find myself still nursing my 2.5 year old daughter, mainly because she hasn't wanted to wean yet. But she's definitely benefitted all this time from it: even though she's in daycare, she rarely gets sick, and when she does, it's always a milder version. Her growth is superb, and she's smart as a whip. I rarely get sick either. You probably won't nurse this long, but there are tremendous benefits to continuing, and after you adjust to the diet and get through tempting holidays, you might find you get used to it and it doesn't feel so onerous. Give it a shot. You might surprise yourself. Edit: I forgot to add, make sure you keep all soap off your breasts--only rinse them, don't use soap in the shower, and get the soap off of your armpits as quickly as possible as well. Soap can affect the taste of your milk and your baby's digestion/reaction. Good luck!

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D.K.

answers from Chicago on

A.,

Congratulations on making it 2 months. You have made it a lot longer than many who didn't have your struggles. My husband has a rare and severe milk allergy and we just found out so does my 8 month old. I have been breastfeeding my son this whole time and he had eczema that I finally realized was caused by me eating too much dairy products (I recently had a really poor bone density test so I was eating a ton of dairy trying to reverse it). Anyway, I cut out dairy from my diet and it cleared up my son's eczema. It wasn't terribly hard for me because we don't have a lot of dairy in our house normally becuase of my husband's allergy. We basically have whole milk and string cheese for my 3 year old who is not allergic to milk.

It sounds like you want to try it. So my advice would be give it a shot for a week, if it doesn't work, then you will know that you tried and you won't get any mommy guilt and you can move back to the formula. If I am wrong and you really don't want to try it, switch. You have breastfed for the most important time and there are plenty of people out there that are healthy and happy and didn't get a drop of breastmilk.

If you decide to do it and want any advice on a milk free diet, feel free to send me a message.

Good Luck,
D.

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