R.J. asks from Gilroy, CA on May 02, 2009
Legal Advice Concerning Separation/ Insurance
My husband of 18 months and I have realized it is not working out. He has been unemployed off and on the entire time we have been together and moved in to my house. When we separated, I removed him from my vehicle insurance and want to remove him from my health insurance. I am paying the monthly premiums and just want to be done with this whole mistake and move on.I feel like I am supporting another child! Someone told him it is illegal for me to do this. Does anyway know the laws regarding this?
1 mom found this helpful
So What Happened?™
Thanks everyone for all your advice, it did help! I will talk to my HR head and plan on filing for divorce asap. It has been a hard decision, but feel like I am going to be better off. Mamasource moms are the best!!
More Answers
J.H. answers from Bakersfield on May 03, 2009
Hi Rhonda,
I thing the "someone" who told him it was illegal was himself! It's definitely not illegal to cut the insurance ties with your husband if it's coming from your job. You can insure whomever you want and not insure whomever you don't want. And if there is life insurance through your job, you should be able to remove him from that as well. If you have life insurance through anyone else, that's not so easy, but if you are the one having to pay those premiums, I would just stop paying them....ta-da, no insurance for him. If it is for you, you can go in at any time and change your beneficiary. I've never heard the beneficiary has to give their consent to be dropped. Good luck to you. And this one's just for green stamps (if you remember those!)....try giving dating and men a rest. It sounds like you may not be sure what kind of relationship you're looking for, and besides, it is best to take a break and re-evaluate your relationship to see what went wrong so the same things don't happen the next time. God bless.
J.D. answers from San Francisco on May 03, 2009
My partner is in the middle of a loooong, drawn out divorce and no, once you file you CANNOT remove him from your insurance. If you do it during open enrollment, he can make you pay for cobra or private insurance to cover the cost of his insurance. Trust me on this one, my partner has had to continue coverage and they have been legally separated for two years. He certainly could have removed her during open enrollment and then he would have been forced by the court to re-add her immediately. Once he's allowed to remove her from his coverage (after the divorce is final), her cost of personal insurance is deducted from her income before they compute alimony.
Thankfully, you haven't been married long, so you should be able to disentangle yourself at least somewhat quickly.
good luck.
K.L. answers from Fresno on May 03, 2009
When my sister was going through a seperation/divorce, she asked her attorney if she could remove him from her insurance and the attorney said not until the divorce was final... however, any bills that you pay he will owe you half of so keep track. If the insurance is for his vehicle or one he drives, he should be paying the entire premium. Keep track and send him the bill or give it to the judge... whichever is easier. But, keep in mind that if he is paying bills that are both of yours, the same stands for you. He can ask you to pay half of anything that he pays on behalf of both of you. Hope this helps. Good Luck?
PS... about what somebody said about alimony and you being responsible... codswalup! If you have only been married 18 months and there are no dependent children between you... you should be in the clear (at least in California), again... hope this helps.
D.S. answers from San Francisco on May 03, 2009
Hello Rhonda: I am sorry that your relationship did not work out. I know that a family member is doing the same & I was told that she is going to have to pay for her own insurance and is doing Cobra but she pays for it. That his insurance cut her off with the divorce. Check with your HR and find out. You should talk to your divorce lawyer and not listen to anything he has to tell you. I do know people that have asked for it as part of the divorce but without children or a medical concern it might be hard to get.
Good Luck with your life, Nana G
G.L. answers from Fresno on May 03, 2009
will it be a divorce in the end? it is illegal to KEEP him ON the insurance once that happens. when your employer doesn't have 'open enrolment' one of the times you can change your plan at anytime is for divorce. ask your HR or Benefits department. you might have to wait until the divorce is final. i'm going through some of this same situation right now. Good luck & i'm glad you're moving on!
T.S. answers from Sacramento on May 02, 2009
Hi Rhonda, sorry you're going through this. I'm also going through a divorce right now, but am a little farther through the process.
First of all, you should talk to an attorney. Most family law attorneys will meet with you one time for a small consultation fee (much lower than their hourly rate, frequently about $100) and you can get these kind of questions answered and decide how you need to proceed.
Second, yes, it is illegal for you to make changes to your life or health insurance from now until the time your divorce is finalized (so if he's the beneficiary on your life insurance you can't change that either). In fact, your insurance carrier probably won't let you make the change. However, there is no reason he shouldn't pay his share of the premium. When you talk with an attorney, ask about ways to take care of that cost.
EDIT... Have you actually filed for divorce. The automatic restraining orders (no changes to insurance, can't take kids out of state etc.) go into effect when you file. If you haven't already filed, you could (and should) probably make whatever changes you want to now.
Good luck, hope this helps.
T.
J.B. answers from Sacramento on May 03, 2009
Rhonda, the biggest point has been missed I think from everyone's responce. You mentioned your husband has been off work the majority of your marriage. Therefore, a judge could see it that you are the bread winner and have to pay your husband alimony. On top of that, make you keep him on your insurance, due to him not having a job.
When I went through my divorce years ago, once you file everything freezes. For example, you cannot remove a spouse from any insurance, change beneficiary, etc. The best advice I can offer is to contact a lawyer. Some have free consulations so show around. Some HR depts are not up on all legal actions.
Good luck
T.Y. answers from Sacramento on May 03, 2009
I am a paralegal but have been divorced twice. I know CA law for common law rules which is over 7 years for everything being separated equally. If you are the primary on the health insurance, you have control to take him off if you so desire, unless he is paying a part of the premiums. To me it sounds that he is not.
If you need help in handling paperwork for filing purposes, let me know.
T.
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