Left or Right or Both?

Until they're about 5, they can't even tell which way letters go. I was concerned when my son wrote so you could read it in a mirror sometimes, but I did some research, and that brain development doesn't happen until 4-5 years old.
I imagine there's something similar with left- or right-handedness.
And there's no reason she would ever have to choose, anyway. My grandfather was ambidextrous, and it was really cool. But just as it takes children longer to speak when they're learning two languages (from bilingual parents), but when they do speak, they do both languages well, I imagine it might take your little girl a little longer to learn to do things well with either hand.
Or she may choose one and stick with it.

It's okay. My daughter's the same way. Same age. They figure things out eventually. I'm not worried about it. They are just in the learning stages. I'm pretty sure its normal. Let her learn at her pace.

I am a three year old preschool teacher, and this is completly normal. Most children do go back and forth at this age, trying to decide on a dominate hand, if she will have one. As she gets older, by mid 4's she will probably not switch in the middle of projects as much. It is not a concern right now, she is probably just fine. If she is getting to be older, like 6 and it is causing issues, maybe then be concerned

Hi, T.. By all means encourage your daughter to use both hands. That means she's using both sides of her brain, as few people do. She will be a better-rounded person overall. J.

When I was a kid I was the same way. My mom used to put all the utensils on one side of the plate to see if I would settle on a dominant had. I didn't until I broke my right arm at 4, and now I am left handed. I still have some right handed tendencies though. I remember in school I had a hard time cutting with scissors, and they couldn't figure why until they realized I was using my right hand and they had given me left handed scissors. Now days the scissors are made to work for either,(I have a 1 lefty & 1 righty daughter)so its not really much of an issue.

I would say to just be patient, especially at 3 I don't think that the quality of her coloring or cutting is due to this. Kids just develop at different rates with different talents. She'll probably sort out which hand she prefers all on her own, or maybe she'll be really talented at using both.

Don't worry about it. At 3 years old your daughter is really learning control and of course, she is going to try out both hands because she hasn't figured out that one hand has a higher degree of control than the other. That is still developing. And perhaps she's a bit ambidexterous. Both of my children are. They switch hands all of the time, and while my daughter is now almost 7 and writes mainly with her left hand, she still switches with cutting and throwing between the two. My son is almost 4 and does the same thing. She's still learning and will be for a while. Losing focus also isn't something to worry about. In order for your daughter to switch hands, she has to stop what she's doing, perform the switch, and then go back to her task. That is enough time for her to need to refocus because at her age, she's still developing concentration skills. Work with her on it. Direct her in her efforts if it seems she needs it, and it will help her make these transitions more smoothly. Don't stress, she'll figure it out!

I wouldn't be worried. Being ambidextrous (using both hands well) is not a bad thing at all. Yes, for right now, she might get a bit confused and loose focus. Just help her learn how to stay with one hand for the task (instead of switching mid task) and how to re-focus if she needs to (although loosing focus mid-task isn't odd for a 3 yer old at all).

And, not proven by anything, but it seems like kids who are ambidextrous may be able to use both sides of their brain better too. But, like I said, I have no sources to cite for that.

My 6 year old was the same way. Once she hit Kindergarten she picked a dominant hand on her own and has done fine. I never really though about it until a few months ago and I asked her If she still uses both hands. She looked at me like she didn't know what I was talking about. She is definitely comfortable with her right hand now. I wouldn't worry until she starts school and if it affecting her handwriting.

My daughter did the same thing. When she was 4 we started using the lined paper and having her write her ABC's and 123's and her name. Once she was concentrating on something she became dominantly left handed but could still use both hands. It takes a little work but once they concentrate they seem to choose which hand feels more comfortable for them to write with and that is the one they will use the most.

My daughter is now 17.

For what it's worth, my daughter didn't choose a dominant hand until she was halfway through kindergarten, and she's doing fine. Her fine motor skills did develop more slowly than is average, but her preschool and kindergarten teachers told me that as long as she was progressing, I shouldn't worry, and indeed now, at age 7 (second grade), she is where she should be developmentally. (She finally settled on being a right-hander, but is still fairly adroit with her left.)

I know that one person's experience is not a substitute for data-supported information, but I hope that our experience gives you some peace of mind.

If you are still concerned after you hear from everybody on this forum, your pediatrician might be a good person to ask.

It is not uncommon for kids to not have a dominate hand. Cutting and coloring are difficult fine motor skills that take time to master. At 3 it sounds like she is doing well. Don't be alarmed, just enjoy the artwork and new skills as they develop.

I say leave it be!!! Don't make her choose. She has an ability to use both sides of her brain equally, that's awesome. But, becuase of that, she has to master more that the average bear. You know?!! Allow her to function the way she was created. You'll both be glad you did for so many reasons.

A variation on this would be to tell her to pick a hand for THIS particular thing THIS time all the way through and then she can switch to the other hand for the next thing.

She sounds cute!!

Hi T.,

My 3 year old has been doing the same, I'm a right handed and my husband is left handed so we always wondered what hand she would use and come to find out she uses both. But I think at the age they are trying to figure it out-part of the learning curve I guess-just let her figure it out on her own--my best friend uses both hands, you can't even tell the difference in a drawing or her writing if she used her left or right hand, that is a possibility too.

All 3 of my kids did this at this age, and we let it be . They are what they are, and the preference will become clear over time. And if not, being ambidextrous is certainly not a bad thing. Two of my kids are completely right-handed, and the other is primarily right-handed but also somewhat ambidextrous. She doesn't write as well with her left but does about everything else equally well. I'm sure the reason you daughter's switching midtask effects the quality of her work is because it changes how her brain has to perceive what she is doing. I'm sure her brain is figuring out what works best. This will resolve itself one way or the other. Good luck!

My son was the same way. Just give her sometimee to decide for herself my son went to school switching hands for everything until he was 8yrs old. Try a sticker on one hand and she can not use the hand with the sticker on it maybe it will work or just give her some time

I am a left-handed person living in a right handed world. My advice to you is to let her experiment and try, don't encourage her to use one hand over the other and most especially don't make her feel like one hand is good and the other is bad. Know that if she does become a left-handed child that you will have to alter how you teach her to do things. I only eat and write with my left hand because everything else was taught to me by a right-handed person who taught me the right-handed way to do it (using scissors, needle working etc). If they would have sat across the table from me to teach me (so that what I was seeing was a mirror image)those things instead of sitting next to me then maybe I would be doing those things left-handed. But there is nothing wrong with being left-handed, I would tell you that I am one of the few people who are in their right minds, it is whatever she is most comfortable with. Continue to encourage her to do her best no matter what hand she chooses to use, and even encourage her to complete a task before she changes hands to minimize the loss of focus. (finish cutting the picture out before switching, or finish the peas then switch to eat the meat.)Good luck
J.

My daughter is 8 yrs old and uses both hands. She eats and writes with her left hand but when bowling, she uses her right hand. I can't remember which she uses to throw a baseball with right off the top of my head but she can do it with both, but one better than the other. In time, your daughter will either choose a dominant hand or become more comfortable using both. She also may be able to write or color with both hands but the quality may be different. When she starts school, be sure you let the teachers know not to try and convince her to use one hand or the other.

I'd just let her experiment and not worry about it. She might be mixed dominants, which can give some problems in school, but nothing serious. Our son was very similar. He now kicks left-footed and writes right-handed. You can check it by giving her a toilet paper roll or paper towel roll and see which hand she takes it with and which eye she looks through. Should be the same. A camera does the same thing. There's really nothing you can do right now, just let her have fun. Someday she'll figure it out. Remind her what she's working on when she gets distracted, but don't push it.