Is It Normal to Be Extremely Emotional When a Child Starts Kindergarten?

Updated on August 09, 2011
E.M. asks from Mesa, AZ
20 answers

I'm normally not emotional but I have been breaking down lately realizing
my oldest is growing up. Is this normal? I want to have another baby
now to hold on to them and know they still need me. Time has gone by too
fast! I feel like we just brought him home and now he is going off and
doesn't need me anymore. Is it gonna be like this every year?

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

As a told another mom last week, YES, totally normal!.. It will happen again when they move on to Middle school, High School and you drop them off at College each year..

At the elementary school we started a "Coffee and Tissues" gathering in the school library.. It was a great way for the experienced parents to help calm the "new parents", many times it was parents that had been there so long and it was their families last year there!

Boo hooing all together..

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C.M.

answers from Dallas on

Totally normal...I hope! My oldest is starting kindergarten on the 22nd and I cry almost every time I think about it. She is super excited, though, and that helps, but I'm still not quite ready to let my girl go.Tears are coming now...better go :-)

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Well, my youngest, my son, just started Kindergarten!
He is happy and was totally ready.
This is my last child in school now.
My daughter is 8.

It is bittersweet.
But it is a Mom's "Rite of Passage" and our "Milestone" too... per the lives of our children.

And NO, for me the answer is not having another baby!
This is a new realm in life, for me and my kids.
I now have to think of, something to do while they are in school and I have more hours to myself. Amidst the usual home care and the kids afterschool.
So that means, possibly finding a part-time JOB.... but I want it to be around my kids' school schedule because I want to be able to drop them off and pick them up, from school.
I need ideas.
And it needs to be in my area. Don't want to commute a lot on the road, for a part time job.

But yes, our kids are growing up.
Main thing they are happy.
And ready.
And that we know... our lives are changing.

My kids, still need me. They tell me and they have many years ahead of needing their Mommy. It will always be. YOU are their Mommy. They will always need you, DESPITE their age-related developmental phases.

2 moms found this helpful

K.*.

answers from Los Angeles on

Aw, I know how you feel. I'm sorry you're so sad! I miss having my son home so much. My friends think I'm a nutjob, because I love having him home for summer. Sigh, my daughters next...maybe it will be easier the second time around...I doubt it though :) Hang in there, you'll learn how to deal with it better.

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Oh it's so normal. I'm sending my 3rd (and last) son off to K this year and just the thought of it brings me to tears (I'm holding back a tear as I type this LOL). I have cried when each one of them started Kindergarten and I imagine that this one will be the worst! I told my husband 2 years ago when we sent our middle son off to K that in 2 years, he'd be dragging me away from school in a straitjacket. We've got 4.5 weeks left until my breakdown!

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A.L.

answers from Charleston on

YES! You are normal. My oldest is transitioning from a primary school to elementary this year for 3rd grade. The new school is right next door to the old school. I am a wreck. It's like starting all over again. Her? She's totally excited and ready to move on. I think with kids it will be hard with the changes as they grow up no matter what. Just think, if you feel this way now, how the heck will you feel when they graduate from high school or college??? I need to invest in the tissue companies starting now. :)

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C.S.

answers from Miami on

I'm not normally like this either - but I keep crying as we try to get my oldest ready for kindergarten. It doesn't help that the same week we start K my baby will turn one. I had no idea it would feel like this...my 5 year old was just a baby yesterday. Now he could be in a school that is locked down - I'm freaking out. And it isn't as though we haven't been apart - he has been in daycare part-time since he was 6 months old!

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S.M.

answers from Washington DC on

In my experience, yes. But it won't last all year :)

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R.F.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter started daycare at 9 weeks old and has had 3 daycares in 5 years. You'd think I'd be accustomed to having her start a new place. Nope - I got teary eyed just REGISTERING her for Kindergarten. I know (2 weeks from today) I will be incredibly weepy. She's my one and only, so every milestone she hits will be the only one we will have together. The school admins reassured me that they will have plenty of tissues on hand, so we know we aren't alone feeling emotional. Good luck. :)
P.S. Your oldest will always need you!!!

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R.S.

answers from San Antonio on

I was excited to send my son...I had a few tears the first day, but over all he was off to conquer the world and it was okay.

Now ask me next fall when my baby starts and there is no one at home with me anymore...I already don't want to think about it.

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R.C.

answers from Chicago on

Yes, but first grade was even worse for me. I watched the clock the whole day. After a few days, I enjoyed all the uninterupted time to get stuff done!

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M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I take off the first day of school every year, except this year since I will be starting a new job the same week. Sadly, though. I will still be there to get them on and off of the bus. Next year my baby will go to kindgarten and I'm SO sad!! it goes so fast, but I will not have more kids to hang on to their youth. It's great watching them grow, as hard as it is to see it happen. My oldest will start 3rd grade, my middle will start 1st, and my youngest still has one more year of pre-k. Either way, it's always sad on the first day. Even dropping my son at daycare on the first day of school is sad, because he gets all new stuff like the others and it's his first official day to be doing the work as well. So sad, but amazing at the same time. Totally normal!

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A.M.

answers from San Francisco on

He SO still needs you. And he will keep acting like he needs you till he's 13 or so. And then he will still need you, he just won't show it.

So you still have 8 more years of a little one who wants to snuggle and hold your hand. Enjoy it. And many moms feel the way you do.

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S.A.

answers from Chicago on

YES! It is very normal! My middle child is starting Kindergarten in two weeks. It seems like my oldest was just starting and now she's going into 4th grade! I am so sad to see my son off to K even tho it's just for 1/2 days. He's such a mama's boy and loves being home with me. He is very nervous about it which does nothing to make me less nervous or sad :( I am so glad I still have my 2 yr old at home with me for a few more years!

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J.G.

answers from Springfield on

I can't decide whether to cry or celebrate! Seriously! I'm so emotional, because I really want this to be a great experience for him and I know it will be but or course I have that "Mommy nervousness." I'm also ready to celebrate. He's growing up, and it's just so exciting to see this. Also, I'm looking forward to some one-on-one time with my 2 year old.

My son will start on a Tuesday, has 2 half days, then 2 full days. My husband and I are going to drop the 2 year old off at day care, take our 5 year old to his first day of kindergarten, then take him to lunch after school. I'm so grateful that we get to do these special things with him, and I'm so excited for my big boy!

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

OMG--YES, it's normal!

Haha--I thought they should have a therapy van do the rounds for the first day of pre-school! haha

It gets easier, trust me. You just worry so much more when they are so little.
Encourage your child to express himself and speak up when he needs help. It will get better. Hang in there.

I've known moms that plan a breakfast/brunch/lunch get together for that first day of K! Safety in number, you know!

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M.R.

answers from Milwaukee on

I helped out in the classroom as much as possible amd that helped us both get through it easier. Plus your child will see you making a difference in his school and be proud that you are helping. I missed my baby all the time during school hours.

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J.C.

answers from Rockford on

Well, my oldest is going to be a senior this year, and I am still getting emotional, lol! In fact, I was sitting here earlier tonight thinking about him being a senior this year and going off to college next year. The next thing I knew I was thinking about when he was a baby and remembering the night I had contractions with him. I feel like a sappy, mushy mess, lol! I know he STILL needs me, so it is ok and is such a fun and exciting thing for him that I want to enjoy that with him as well. So, yes, your feelings are completely normal and you will experience them many times with many experiences.

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S.F.

answers from Phoenix on

My twins just started preschool and I feel the same way. Neither one cried leaving me but when I hit the car realizing they were no longer my babies. Hopefully it gets easier but I don't know. I cry thinking about them getting married already and they are only 3, I have awhile before that.

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J.W.

answers from Phoenix on

It is totally normal. My DS (and my only) is starting kindergarten on Thursday. Every time I think about it I get teary eyed. I am so excited for him but I am sad that he is growing up so fast. I wish I could turn back time!

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