I'm Potty Training HELP!!!!

Updated on October 16, 2007
M.M. asks from Omaha, NE
13 answers

I have a two year old thats almost 3 and we have for the past 2 weeks been working on potty training. He was doing really good with lots of cues for me to go. Well the past couple of days I have been cuing him and he flat out refuses to go. Is there something I'm doing wrong or any ideas of what I can do to make him like to use the potty again. everytime he went before he was rewarded with lots a praise and a smartie candy every once in a while. i have hear that people give candy for going but I dont like give my children a lot of sweets and when I tryed to get him to go every hour I thought that might be to much. I know that he knows how to use the potty just lately he just wont go. Sometime I sit him on there anyways and he wont go. 2 minutes later he tells me he went potty and Im changing his pull- up or diaper! Please HELP with any ideas that can make this easier on me!! Thanks a million!

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So What Happened?

Okay so I took a lot of your helpful advice. No more diapers except when sleeping(baby steps RIGHT!!!). I also went to Walmart and bought 2 large mason jars. Payton and I decorated both with stickers and all that fun stuff. Inside one are small prizes such as stickers, crayons, and ext.. The other has larger prizes such as hotwheel cars, suckers, and ext... When he pee's on the potty he gets to choose out of the small prize jar and when he has a bowel movement he gets to choose from the larger prize jar. So far he wants those suckers, so for three days in a row he has poo pooed on the potty. It's kinda sad that my baby is growing up so quick. It is something that I'm still trying to deal with, this potty stuff is making wonder where the time went. thanks to all of you for the great advice. I love this website knowing that there are women going through the samethings I am in the same town. Blessings to you and your families!
M. Mabrey

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J.F.

answers from Davenport on

Hang In There.. It took my daughter awhile also but i have i learned it was not that she didn't know when she was when she had to go or just didn't make it in time. We learned that she was just lazy and when she had a pull up and didn't "feel" like getting up and going. So, we made her wear panties as much as we can because of it. She got it after awhile..

Best Of Luck...

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T.B.

answers from Rapid City on

www.thepottytrainer.com
by Johanne Cesar

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T.T.

answers from Denver on

The best piece of advice I can give you is don't use pull ups or diapers! Only during naps and at night. During the day, put him in underwear. He doesn't know what it's really like to be wet because pull ups are too absorbent. It means a lot of laundry and sticking to your guns. If he wants to wet his pants, fine, but he's not going to like it. It took my son a week. I still rewarded him (with pennies) when he went on the potty, but he did way better in real underwear than in pull ups. Potty training was my least favorite parenting job ever...so far. :) Good luck!

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A.B.

answers from Fargo on

When my oldest (now 4) was that same age, she stopped using the toilet and always went in her pull-up. I was fed up with it and told her that we no longer were going to wear pull-ups during the day and that she had to keep the princesses dry. We've only had a handfull of accidents since then and we're going on almost 2 years now. That may just be his way of saying he's ready to be a big boy! We also did that with the night time training as well...she'd stay dry all night and instead of going on the toilet in the morning, she'd go in her pull-up. Once the package was gone we told her we weren't buying anymore for her!

Good luck and enjoy only having one in diapers! ;)

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B.B.

answers from Davenport on

I told my daughter when she was almost 2 1/2 years old that I wasn't going to buy her pull-ups anymore and that she needed to go to the potty like a big girl so she didn't have an accident in her pants. I then explained to her how gross it was to go potty in her pants and used lots of words like dirty, squishy, wet, things that she would want to avoid. She said ok Mommy and that was it. But, this was also after I was at my wits end and had tried everything else. I think that we need to give our children more credit for understanding some concepts than we do, my daughter understood that it was not ok to go potty in her panties, and once we sat down and had a talk about how she wasn't going to wear pull ups anymore she was fine with it. One more thing, I had someone suggest to me to let her run around bare bottomed at home. The idea is that the child won't "go" on the floor. Didn't work for me, but it might work for you :)

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J.G.

answers from Lincoln on

Hey M.,
Hang in there. You are doing everything right, he is just inserting his independence. Have you tried a sticker chart? Or stamps on his hand. I have used both along with candy, you just have to find what works best with your son. Another thing I would suggest is making him responsible for peeing in his pants by putting underpants on and then a diaper over it. This way he is feeling the wetness, but you don't have the mess. Have him take off his wet underpants and put a new pair on. The key here is to empower him to make the decision to pee in the potty or in his pants. Some children just need that additional push to get over the hump and be potty trained.

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J.C.

answers from Des Moines on

I used to work in a daycare and my class was that exact age group so me and another girl were always potty training about 5 at once. One thing that worked for some of them was to just stick him in underwear and when he potty's in his pants most likely he isnt going to like how that feels. We had really good success with that. Even as much as a few of them had 1 or 2 accidents after that. Another thing is we would take them in there about every 30-45 minutes and make them sit there and try. Good luck!

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L.K.

answers from Omaha on

My oldest daughter was a little over 2 3/4-3 years before I tried the potty with her(mostly because I had twins when she was a little over 2 years). What worked for me on all three was not to put them in a pull-up or diaper when potty training as they didn't mind having a wet or dirty diaper. However having wet or dirty big kid pants was a different. The first week I used a pull-up at night and panties during the day or commando( bare bottom) and this helped because they didn't want wet pants or pee on the floor. My older daughter had difficulty going #2 and had issues but the twins had no problems. I would give them stickers, nail polish or something small as a prize for going in the potty. When they were completely trained we got them a bigger prize as an award for being big girls. Hope this helps and remember they know when there ready. It doesn't matter if they are 3 1/2 or later when fully trained. It's not a race and there are not behind if there not trained by 2. Good Luck.

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S.M.

answers from Davenport on

Hang in there. We're going through the EXACT same thing with my son, who's 3 years and 2 months. He's been dry through the night for about a year already, but just can't be bothered to go potty during the day. I have been putting him in underwear with vinyl pants over them, and he STILL messes his pants, only now he's complaining that his butt's sore. I'm trying to get him to make the connection between messing his pants and the sore butt. (Don't worry, we're applying ointment.)

I've been at my wits' end for a while. However, it seems that most of the boys in his preschool class are at about the same stage. Your boy's only 2, so it may take a while (or you could be lucky!). I'm just giving thanks for the dry nights and working from there. Let me know if you have success!

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A.R.

answers from Omaha on

We tried potty prizes which we were told worked great! You take keychains, tattoos, stickers, small trinkets and wrap them in tissue party. You put them in a bowl on the back of the toilet and everytime let actually use the toilet, not just sit on it, they get a potty prize! However, this didn't work for us. My oldest has autism and it took him til he was five and my youngest was following his big brother and he was 4. So when we moved into our new house I said, "That's enough." I threw out the pullups and never bought anymore. Instantly potty trained!
I did just read a review on the Lionel Railroad Crossing Coin Bank that a lady used it to potty train her child. They kept a bowl of coins and everytime he went in the potty he got to put a coin in the bank and see the lights flash and the whistle for the train blow. Never thought about using it for toilet training but she said that it worked for her.

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J.J.

answers from Omaha on

Dear M.,

I'm a mother of 4 children and I've come full circle on this issue. First of all I just want to say that potty training can be extremely frustrating because you know that your child knows what to do and when to do it, but THEY are in control, NOT YOU. When I finally realized this and relaxed, everything got better and easier!

I have 3 boys and 1 girl. Girls just get it sooner and are easier in my opinion. After my first boy, I don't even attempt to start the potty training until they are 3 yrs. Now, that doesn't mean that the child won't come to you and ask to be trained and start going by himself. If he does and insist on big boy pants, then that is great, job done and no sweat to you. I have discussed this with my peditrician and he was relieved and said that he wished all mom's had my attitude. I know it may be hard because you have loving Grandma's telling you what and how to do it. Go with your instints and relax. Don't worry and he will get it. As soon as you back off, he will probably start going again.

One other suggestion - once you're committed to potty training you should get rid of all diapers. In my opinion, pull-ups are just fancy diapers and your child knows it. You will have to deal with many accidents, but he will get it. He has to have the accidents in order to learn. Also, night time training is different than daytime training. Sometimes the child will stop wetting the bed at night when they potty train and sometimes they don't. BE PATIENT!

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C.D.

answers from Cedar Rapids on

I think you should try underwear during the day and use pull ups or diapers at night. I had the same problem with my son when he was 3. After I used underwear he didn't like being all wet when he went so he started using the potty more and more until he finally quit going in his pants. Good luck:)

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J.M.

answers from Des Moines on

Just hang in there. You'll go through ups and downs. Our doctor told us that sometimes the take a break because their working a some other skill set.

Or I know with our daughter, who we're training right now...sometimes if made it seem like her choice...You can go potty or got to take a nap....She hates naps (or being in her room alone)...so going to the bathroom was a no brainer.

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