I Have a Question About Strangers Touching and Making Coments About My Son.

Hello all!

This isn't really an advise...just a comment. First of all, I am a mother of 3...a 10 1/2 yr. old, almost 8 yr. old, and a 5 yr. old...I had no idea moms felt this way about strangers admiring their babies. I have no recollection of any incident in particular where i got really annoyed or angered by anything any stranger did to my children. They would comment, touch, pat, etc.-although, i don't think anyone attempted to kiss them, or i would've probably said something. But anyway, I was probably the mose worrywart of all the moms i knew back then. Everyone teased me and commented about it--that was the annoying part. Otherwise, I was just a very proud mother that I wanted to show my babies off to the world. I welcomed every oohs and aahs, and touching on the little feet and hands. My kids are half white half filipino and there were times when people would question me if they were mine- I simply took that as a compliment. Babies are just so cute and irresistable! And i guess, some people just don't know their boundaries.

J., I hope you find a way that works for you.

I always make it clear feet are ok to touch, but nothing else.
As far as the coments, just let it slide! :)

I have twins who were premies. I told everyone that the babies had weak imune systems and that they could only be touched after someone has washed their hands. So... "I hope I don't offend you, but I don't let anyone touch my baby that has not washed their hands" followed by an explanation -if you feel that they deserve it.

And I have an avon question. I love the way that skin so soft works with bugs- however, do I need to buy the special "bug/ spf protection" or can I just buy the original lotion to do the same thing. I understood that people were using the lotion for years before they came out with a special version. Also, its soooo expensive! $10 for 4 oz vs. $7 for 12 oz of the lotion. Thank you!

I, and every other mother I know has encountered this! It's very annoying, but as you're little grows or if you have a second baby it will probably be the last thing you worry about! I think it's just a new mother thing we all go through, but I bet you'll look back and realize it's just one of those silly things we overreact to with our first babies. They are going to get sick, dirty, and goofy comments made about them. I just say 'so what' now. Like the other mother said, let it roll off your back. My babies were gigantic and now they are both so skinny I got it both ways!! Have fun w/him and ignore it.

LOL! I can understand where u are coming from and trust me I know that gets on ur last nerves! I am a person that loves babies and I like to hold on them 2. I have a 7 and 5 year old and I am working on getitng them unspoiled b/c I held them all of the time. When I see precious babies I want to hold and touch them but I will ask first b/c it is sooo rude. If u are having this problem and it is that bad, u have a precious baby that is very irristable!!! I had that problem with my children and I just got over it. It makes u think that if so many people didn't pay attention that u had an unattractive child but that i obviously not your case.
Good Luck!!!

Oh, J., I have so been there (with the big baby comments). My son was (and is) extremely tall (he's 9 and I'm almost looking eye-to-eye with him, and he's always the tallest boy in class, sports, etc.). As a baby, he was long and c***by -- but his height and weight were proportionate, etc. At 12 weeks, he was in 12 mo. clothing...

Anyway, I got all kinds of comments on his size. I found older men were the kindest (things like, that's a future linebacker you have on your hands); elderly women meant well but came across as judgmental (like, what are you feeding that child? And when I'd answer breast milk, they'd say, that must be some super-powered milk!) ... but it was mother-aged women in their 20's - 40's who were the worst. Everywhere we went, I heard about how fat he was, how c***by he was, how much do I feed him, are you worried about his size, etc.

It got to the point that I was tired of people saying foolish things and being rude. So at the post office one day, when the woman behind the counter was going off on a tirade about my son's size, I told her that I would think she'd be more sensitive to making fat comments about people given her own obvious weight issues.

That stopped it pretty quick.

Generally, I just smiled at people and said something about how blessed we are that he's healthy, but when people went over the top, I felt no need to hold back. Might not be a solution you care to follow, but it worked for me (and it felt SO much better to not stand there and bite my tongue while someone was going on and on....)

As for touching, grab their wrist and ask them to please not touch your child. They have no right to do so. It's like when strangers would touch my belly when I was pregnant -- why on earth do people think they can do that?? It doesn't stop in infancy, either; people keep thinking they can pat my daughters head, tickle her chin or belly (she's 5); usually it's the baggers at the grocery store or older folks, but it still makes me crazy. I usually say something about not liking people to touch her (and they usually look at me like I'm whacked) -- but it scares her a little, and I think it's completely inappropriate.

Bottom line is do what makes sense/feels right to you...

Yes this is the same response most people get. I have a 4year odl daughter who is not afraid of strangers because so many of them talk to her and have since she was little. She thinks everyone is her friend. I also have a 5 mo. old who people just love to touch her face. This then makes me go home and give her a bath because she is allergic to most scented things. She also breaks out in a rash after unknown people touch her. I know exactly what you are going through. Just try to be as polite as possible and say "Well thanks for your comments but please don't touch her/him." Thanks. Sometimes people can be rude with their comments. I try to just shake my head and walk off most the time. I understand what you are going through but hopefully it will pass.

You're where I was two years ago... I even had a nurse at my former pediatrician's office tell me that my son was fat. What most people don't see when our kids are in carriers or strollers is their height. Like your son, my son was tall and chunky but as long as the dr says he's healthy, that's all that matters...
When people tried to touch my son I simply stated that I prefer that they not do so. Most people understood with babies and germs and all that. Good luck!

Welcome to mommyhood! People lose their minds when it comes to babies, all those nice manners that they were taught go right out the window. They think they have a right to make comments, touch, etc... I have noticed that people want me to wake my son up, get a peek, how old, how much does he weigh? etc... I haven't had many strangers wanting to touch him, but I remember that when I was little people always wanted to touch me (because I had really red hair which was an oddity back then). It didn't stop until I was a teen, and then it was my friends wanting to pat my head.

If you see people wanting to touch, I agree with the other moms, tell them whatever you want to and don't let them touch. You could even say something like, "we are teaching him early not to go with strangers!" But you will have to get use to the stupid comments.

I am adamant about strangers not touching my children. Once when standing in line at a restaurant, a lady behind me KISSED my child (I had my baby up on my shoulder, so the lady was face to face with her). I was mortified! I also turned in a complaint at Collin Creek Mall about a lady who was cleaning tables ... she came to my table and when my daughter reached out, she held hands with her! And the lady had just been wiping down tables with a nasty looking rag; I know her hands weren't clean. These things happen in the *blink* of an eye, so I have learned to see it coming.

To keep strangers at bay, I just politely say "Oh, we better not touch the baby 'cause I think she's getting a cold." or "Oh, please don't touch my baby she's just getting over a nasty cough." or "Oh, please don't reach for my baby, we are teaching her not to touch strangers." Those usually work pretty well.

As far as the comments about your child being a good eater, just say thank you or ignore it completely. They probably don't know what else to say and it isn't meant to offend you.

Good luck!

i love kids!! I like tell moms' how beautiful are hers kids. Don't worry Is just your kid must be very very, very... beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!! And your're a new mom. i'm sure the people who touched your baby is with love. .....
D.

Hi J. - as far as I am concerned, your kid...you decides who touching him. We have been at several events where people decided it was okay to hug or touch my daughter....I was not comfortable with this. I finally got to the point where if a stranger approaches I stand between them and my daughter or put my arm around my daughter. I have actually told a few people that as much as I appreciate their complements and such that I'd prefer that they not hug my daughter as we are teaching her about strangers, etc. Most have been okay with it.

Stand firm - he's your son and you have the right to protect him the way you prefer.

All the best,
C.

if you want to control it a bit, try a front carrier (something like a Bjorn or sling) and people won't touch him if he is on you.
Or, do what I often did. If you shop or stroll with him in his baby/infant car carrier, cover it with a blanket and let people assume he is sleeping. Mine had a canopy, so I would open it all the way and then cover the remaining hole with a blanket. Even when my daughter was awake, as long as she had some toys and maybe some sort of mobile-type thing hanging from the handle bar she was fine with being covered.

Just some suggestions!

Also - you can politely tell people to please not touch him or to please keep their comments on parenting to themselves as you are quite capable of making your own decissions on how your son will be raised with the great guidance you get from his pediatrician.

Jen and Mandy---I totally agree with you guys about this!! I never would have thought that so many people don't want others talking to or touching their kids! What are you really teaching when you become so defensive and stressed by comments that others make about your child? Your teaching your child to react the same way. When they enroll in school with this "no-one-can-look-at-me-or-touch-me-attitude" who suffers then? We (the teachers) do.

I'm kinda on the fence with this one. I do understand but then I don't (weird huh?). I guess because if I see a healthy child, sometimes I do say things like "he's a big boy" but I don't mean it to be ugly. Most people I know take that as a compliment and we laugh about it. People make comments about how small my daughter is and I could care less. My friends are the ones who do it the most and I tell them, "my child's normal and your's is just awkwardly big"--but then again, they are my friends and I can talk to them that way. As far touching her, that was a concern when she was a newborn but at 7 months, I wasn't as protective. She was with a babysitter while I was working so she was touched by others most of the day anyway. Try not to take those things to heart too much--most people really don't think they're being ugly, they're just talking. Just ignore it.

Hi J., I honestly think people are just looking for something to talk about and love babies and it is easy to say the wrong thing! People always commented on my large son but I know others constantly get comments on their smaller children as well and how they must not feed them! I don't really recall alot of people touching him randomly however, which I wouldn't like, b/c that is how they can get sick repeatedly. I definitely would learn to let comments roll off your back b/c as they get older, the comments will continue but will just change (my, your son is so quiet/rambunctious/pick a word!). I think, as mothers, we are sensitive and others that are past the stage just don't remember. Good luck!

OMG, I sooooo know what you are saying. I am pregnant and people get touchy with me. I have a tendency to hold my arms over my tummy now. I have a hand phobia anyway. I don't know where people have put their hands or if they have washed them and it's flu season!

I don't know what to tell people. I might just post a sign that says I bite hands off or my mommy bites, hands off. It may get some looks, but it gets the point across. You might also block them by whiping his nose or something. Something to just get between them and your baby.

As for the weight comments, just tell them you are grateful that he is so healthy. I'm sorry, but I think chunky babies are the best. You know that momma is taking care of their needs and they are happy in their world.

Congratulations on your sweet one and don't let anyone walk over your concerns. You are right to be weary of strangers touching him.

Good luck!
Jodi

I know where you are coming from. I did not want anyone touching my girls either, you never know where peoples hands have been! I started being a stay at home mom 6 1/2 yrs ago with my first daughter and am still home. I kept them covered with a blanket in the carrier all the time and when a little older I jsut had to say please dont touch. Everyone always commented on how beautiful they were and also if they were mine or my grandkids as well since they are mixed too and I had them in my middle 30s and wanting to know what they were mixed with and if their dad was black. that still to this day is asked and makes me mad since we dont teach our kids race or colors. They know us as mom and dad and us all as being human colors of god, some light some dark but all the same.

I have a group and on my group there is a link where there is a sign to put up stating not to touch the baby and I wish I would have thought of it myself. I think she had a great idea and you can go to her site and order this if you like. I will give you the link to the group so you can take a look at it. I wish I would have seen it when mine were smaller , I sure would have gotten a few of them. Good luck to you.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/freeoralmostfree/join/

the link will be under links section sidebar on left side and click it and it will be called my tiny hands!

Hi J.,
Just like all the moms, it's never okay for a stranger to just touch your child. The ones I feel most awkard and strange is when a man comments on my child--mind is doing alot of negative self talk. I just like one mom said, just tell the stranger not to touch your child due to cold.
As far as "big baby" comments, don't let that bother you. It's very hard to do so, but all babies are different in size and weight, and eventually your child will lose all their baby c*** when they start crawling and walking.I was always asking my doctor if my daughter was to c***by and reading if I was feeding her to much, but I soon realized to let the comments go or else my sanity will get the best of me! My baby girl looked like a butterball but once she started crawling and walking she is skinny as a toothpick--and she's only 2yrs old.
Good luck!!

B B

You have every right to be upset, not this is a fair comparison, but people get pretty mad when you touch their pets without asking first.
Really if anyone can tell you anything about your son's size is his Pediatrician. I actually told people that I didn't mind if they asked first especially with the flu season not being over, and most important you don't want your son to think it's ok for any random person to just come up to him and touch him. He needs to know that his body IS NOT for just anyone to touch when they feel like it. Some people see me as overprotective/ overbearing, but I don't care because there are to many weirdos out there! Don't forget that as his mother you have every right to do what is best for him regardless of what others think or say. You'll be glad you did later.

You do make a good point about people touching the baby ... we don't know where those hands have been etc... but by the same token... kids are pretty tough and pick up all kinds of junk and germs from the floor.. especially when they are crawling.

As the other lady said...that is how they also learn some of their social skills and not to be afraid of others.. etc..

Maybe you can come up with something to put on baby stroller or whatever .. baby on board.. germ free area... look but don't touch... something cute ...

Also do you have an AVON website I can order from?

Call me at ###-###-#### and leave me a message if I am not available.

Thanks.
EB

I heard that for Hispanics, if they "think" a thought about your baby, they believe they HAVE to touch the baby or they will curse it. Weird...

I used to live in a small West Texas (close to the Mexico border) town when my two daughters were babies... every time I went into a store, I would pretty much expect not being able to get out of there without them being touched.

If you are not comfortable with them touching your baby, then tell them not to, nicely. I wouldn't put up with the snide remarks though...

i totally know what you mean. my daughter is only 10 weeks but i have the same problems. she was 9 pounds at birth and is already up to 12 pounds. every time we go out people stop and make comments that she looks like she is closer to 6 months old. i also know what you mean about the touching. when it was colder outside i kept her in a bundle me but now that is's warmer she has become a free for all with strangers. i wish i had some advice but i'm too new to this whole motherhood thing myselg. good luck.

As far as the touching, I would literally say, "Please don't touch him." The comments are different. For some reason people feel the need to always comment on babies' size, etc. Just nod and smile without saying anything, or come up with a random comment to counter it like, "I really like your sweater." You really have to just blow it off because it will never stop. My daughter is in the 10th percentile in size and I can't ell you how many times I've heard "oooooohhh....she's sooooo tiny!" I like to respond with, "Yes, and she's brilliant too."

Yes, you are an over worried mom. 99% of the time when someone talks to your child or wants to pat him, it should be a compliment. Please don't take it so seriously. If someone is totally out of line....tell them and be firm. The other 1% are just "busy bodies" who may tell you that your child is underdressed, overdressed, under or over fed. They are just trying to play on your insecurities, and they deserve anything you are willing to dish out! My children are 19 and 7, and it was the same with them in public. You will be much more relaxed with a second child, I can assure you. I guess the only concern I have is that children, even very young ones, can pick up on your anxiety and insecurity, and I can tell by what you wrote that you would not want that to happen. There's not enough time or room here, but your story is so much like my sister-in-law's...and believe me...her children were affected and are insecure to this day. They overreact in almost all situations. Now, they are having a hard time undoing the damage. One final suggestion...politely ask strangers not to touch your child's hands or near their mouths...you are right to protect your son from possible illnesses and the like.

Teacher, early childhood development; current stay-at-home mom by choice, T.

Like most of the moms, I can totally realate to your situation. When my little boy was less than a year old, he actually looked nearly 2! We got so many comments about how we might be overfeeding him, and such. He was just a very big kid, length, not weight wise. Some of it was me in that I had to be ok with his size and know that he was healthy and not second guess myself. I have always had issues with weight and size comments. That comes from my family constantly criticizing others who are not stick thin or like they think they need to be. I found myself growing into a person who was more comfortable in my parenting (and feeding!) abilities through that.
As for having strangers touching your little one, do not let someone you don't know touch them. As a biology professor, I know the germs that people walk around with and you don't know what is on that other person. I would just put myself between the other person and my son and leave it at that. The other person should respect your boundaries and your judgement as a mom. Just take a deep breath and know that this will pass!

If you are worried about people thinking your a strangerphobe, dont. Do take the blame on yourself. "We have had such a hard time keeping Johhny well, I have turned into such a germaphobe. I am sorry, I do not like him to be breathed on much less touched except by family and close friends." Lie they wont know the difference :)

As for the weight issues, I heard from someone more in the know when my oldest was little, when they comment on a big baby say, I know, I love that there is so much to love about him. For little babies, I know, dont you wish we could all be that size.

People say stupid things for lack of something smart to say. We all have our moments, watch out when your little one is all grown up, you might find it hard not to peak at those litte bundles.

Hang in there he will be grown before you know it!

OOOO...this happened to me, too!! I hated it!!!! I would just put the cover of the infant carrier or stroller over him
if it got too bad. I would also just smile and then ignore. Most people got the hint.

About the weight thing...my son was 10 lbs. when born. Then he leveled out and was in the 40% of his weight group. It was
so irritating having people make weight comments (because of
his big, cute cheeks). Who makes diet suggestions for an infant??!!! My m-i-l was the worst one, and I told her to knock it off. I didn't want my son growing up with a weight complex before he was 2. This is why we have so many eating disorders!!!

I don't think this is a big deal at all. I can understand that you may not be used to it because you're a first time mom, but why in the world are you stressed about it? What's wrong with people commenting on your child? Everyone has their own free will, and even if you don't like it, they can say whatever they like. And, I'm sure they usually mean it as a compliment. Why would you let others' comments about your son affect you? You are just teaching him to be self-concious about what others say. And, of course you don't walk up to an adult and say, "Wow, you sure are a big boy." because you're an adult too!

Hi J.,

I've had several occasions when I'm holding my daughter who is now 18 mo. and someone (usually someone I know) is talking to her and cooing at her and they reach out to touch her arm and accidentally touch my breast in the process! Sometimes I don't think they even realize it, but it sure is uncomfortable for me!!

I don't have any advice for you regarding people touching your baby, but I do have a great story. My 6 wk old baby and I were headed to my OB/GYN for my 6 weeks checkup, and we were in the elevator at the Dr. office. A pregnant mom was also in the elevator along with her own mother. The older mother was looking at my little one and saying how sweet she was and then started touching her. The mother's pregnant daughter gasped, "Mom, I wouldn't want some stranger touching MY baby!!" The mother stopped and looked at her, and I just smiled. It was great!!! I think about that day and laugh!!

Know that we've all been there and are all trying to find ways to get through it! Good luck to you!

A.

I hear you on this one. This is what I did, and I only had one or two people try to touch him at the store. If he was in the carrier, I put the visor up to where it looked like he was asleep, and really people wouldn't see him as easily. I also carried him in the Snugli a lot (the little thing that straps on like a backwards backpack). No one ever tried to touch him then because he was right up against me. I also kept my arms around him when he was in the snugli.

I absolutely HATED hearing those exact same comments. I also heard all the time about his cheeks being so c***by. There's not much you can do. I would always mention that he was in the 50 percentile or whatever and let them know that meant he was average (or below average if you look at his height). I would also mention how perfectly healthy the dr said he was at our last visit or whatever came to mind. People just don't think before they speak, and a lot of people who said that to me were those who had never had kids. You're defensive because it's your baby, and you don't want anyone to have negative thoughts about him. It's also that your hormones are still out of whack. Just keep telling him how beautiful he is like you already do, and just ignore those people.

I'm a little late on commenting and you have already been given some good advice. I'm writing, because I'm kind of shocked. I have 4 grown young adult sons and when they were babies, people DIDN'T touch them, especially like I've read from your responses. Touching my stomach while I was pregnant, drove me nuts - like it wasn't my stomach anymore. I'm a big baby lover and always want to touch them, but have never attempted to touch a strangers baby - You just don't do it! But I always talk to the baby and now understand why Women now get apprehensive and a little nervous, I guess they are worried I'm getting ready to touch. This did not used to be an issue - I think people expected to get their head bit off if they touched a strangers new baby! You say whatever you want!
You do not want your child growing up thinking it's ok for any and everyone to touch them. I agree they need to be exposed to some germs to build up their immune system but strangers at hospitals and grocery stores? I'm not a germophobic, however, If someone touches their little hands or fingers and then the baby rubs their eyes, they are getting those germs in their system, quicker than if they were to let the person stick their finger in their mouth. Babies rub their eyes alot. Newborns rub their eyes mostly over being sleepy, the older they get after an exchange of hands with a stranger - they tend to get shy and rub their eyes. If a Doctor is not going to touch your baby without gloves, then strangers shouldn't either. When hospitals are full beyond compacity with people with the flu or worse MRSA - Medically Resistant Staff Infection, You can't be too overprotective. I think the Mom that had the suggestion of coming up with some creative way of saying "Don't touch" would be best. If I comment on a baby's size, which I often do, it's always meant as a compliment! Oh look how tiny she is means oh she's adorable and "That's a big baby" means good job Mom, you are not starving your baby or giving it food it can't tolerate! But now will be more sensitive to comments, I make. Good luck and maybe more Mom's can figure out the best creative way to get the don't touch message out, without having to say it.

Hi :) I am a first time mom to a little 11 month old now & he gets touched a lot.. most of the time I am ok with it.. sometimes I think to myself take out a wipey later lol - I see a lot of comments about saying please don't touch him etc. - but am trying to wrap my head around the actuall reality of it.
If someone is patting his little head & saying how cute he is, & I said oh please don't touch him I could just imagine the shocked embarred reaction. Unless someone seems really wierd/gross - I just can't imagine saying something to them, its society and we love babies & its a way of connecting..
I would be interested in seeing what people think about that.. who actually says please don't touch & what is the reaction?

I have a two month old I see where you are coming from...it does tend to freak us out as mommys because we want to protect them from everything! But babys are irresistable. I have even heard that are chemicals in our brain to make us think babys are cute so we will want to procreate, CRAZY huh?

My daughter wieghed 10lbs 4 oz so i constantly hear about her being too big...but in fact she is way healthier than some babies. She eats mixed rice in her bottle already because she wasn't getting satisfied.

What you're telling the strangers about his weight and height is perfect. People tend to voice their opinions openly when you have a child...you are finding that out and it will continue to happen. Now about the touching, that's a tough one. My daughter has curly hair and people LOVE to touch it and it used to drive me nuts. Now I don't worry about it because she's older(4) and despite people still commenting on her looks, the touching is few and far between. BUT about the touching the face etc... Easier said than done, but I think just politely asking them not to is the only way to stop it. OR, you could make up something like "please don't touch him, he's sick". That might stop them. OR, you could just let them do it and the second they walk away, attack your baby with a wipe!

My kids are now 13 and 14 but I used to hate it. I still remember one woman calling my dd 'porkchop cheeks' and wanting to pinch her.....no no no no....I grabbed hands, said no, whatever was necessary...unless they were elderly and I was a bit nicer about that. I love babies but do not touch them unless given permission and never a stranger's child. If you do not want your child touche - STAND YOUR GROUND!!

The first time I got my daughter out of the house after her being in the NICU was to go and see her doctor. While waiting in the waiting room at a Family Practice, this woman walks over and wants to see my DD. I tell her No, and she keeps on insisting to see her. I tell her No again and then she sneezes onto the blanket covering DD up. I went off on her. My DD was not even suppose to be born yet, was hooked up to a apena/cardiac moniter and was just coming in after getting released from the NICU to establish that 1st doctor visit.

You have every right to tell someone not to touch your baby, it's YOUR baby!!! My DD is now 17 months old and I am still very "Don't Touch Her" when strangers approach us (she has some sensory issues and cannot see very well upclose). The comments - they get annoying, we have the opposite problem of how tiny she is and why, blah, blah, blah. Good Luck!!!

I think you have the right to be upset!!!! I would hate it if someone touched my daughter at all. What I try to do is cover her car seat in the store with a light blanket so they can't get to her. People give there advise even if it is NOT wanted. I would just smile and nod...or say he is perfect to me and the doctor thinks so too!!! Kill them with kindness my grandma always said!!!

we are trying to teach him to throw the horns but until then, I simply do to them what they do to him, yesterday i was so tired of it after a long day of errands i pretended i was deaf.

Hi J.,

My name is R. and I have 2 beautiful daughters. I am a dark skinned African American and my girls are mixed. They have long hair, one has light brown eyes and my other, green eyes. I get asked all the time if they are mine. It does become annoying. People always buy them things in the store or ask if they could give them money. When people do walk up I just grab them and take a step back. Usually body language deters them from rubbing their hair or staring in their face. Just take a step back and do a small shake of your head "no". You can still smile and be polite but this has worked for me. Now if this doesn't work then voice your opinion. First of all NO ONE has any right to touch your child. They have crossed a line and should be told so. I have had to do do this a couple of times myself. Being "petted" by strangers is not a very good feeling. If we don't stand up for our little ones who will? I still have to do it and my girls are 4 and 6 now. Good luck!

I dont think that you should take any of this personally at all. People are naturally affectionate to babies and pregnant women. I def wouldnt let any one go overboard and cling to the baby, but a pat on the head or touch on the cheek I would just let slid. Also remem that exposing your child to new people will help them to be more social and interact more easily. And believe it or not the exposure to the different germs are also good for babies too. It helps to build their ammune systems and get them ready for the real jungle of germs...school! I undestand how you feel about the comments and although most people dont mean it to be hurtful or judgmental, u cant help but feel that way. I usually just agree with them and tell them how happy I am that my children are healthy. Thats takes away all of their ammo and puts you back into control.

J.,

I know exactly what you're talking about. I cannot go anywhere with my son without hearing comments and sometimes people try to reach out and touch him. I would say my son is normal for his age, he's two, but he has this striking blonde hair and that's where the comments come from. I have brown hair, husband has the blonde hair. I swear I've had people follow me in stores before and that just makes me angry. I am very protective of my son. I've heard some comments about his size, but that was usually from my family. I would snap back at them. I think my Mom even calls him "big 'um". Not sure where she got that, and it offended me at first, but now I know she's not calling him "big".

We were at Stonebriar a few weeks ago after getting my son a hair cut. While waiting in line for lunch several people turned around and oohed and aahed over him. I would say thank you, and tell my son to say hi. He looked at this one lady and snapped "hello". It was so funny and up in her face like. I'm okay now if they comment on him (mostly his hair color) but please do NOT reach out and touch my child. You just do not reach out and touch strangers I don't care how cute they are.

Someone below mentioned how strangers like to touch their preggo belly. A good friend of mine is pregnant with twins and she's almost full term. A few weeks ago I was at the hospital visiting her (she's on bed rest) and the boys started kicking and moving around. I've known her for seven years, at least, and I even asked first if I could touch her belly. Of course as soon as she gave me the okay and I put my hand on the spot the boys stopped moving. Darnit! It's such an incredible feeling to feel the baby move.

I read somewhere "to blame it on your child". When a stranger wants to touch him, say "you don't want to get to close he's contageous." You'll get some weird looks, but it kept people's hand off my kiddos!
Good luck!