I Can't Get off the Computer!

I completely understand. internet/computer addiction is a very real thing. i use a program called workrave. it's a free program you can download. you can block internet at certain times of the day, or limit the amount you are on in a day. it also prompts you to take breaks. you set the amount of time you work and the length of the breaks. the breaks are annoying when you're in the middle of something important, but you can delay them, and it really helps to force you to get up and take a break. i work on the computer, and this is the only thing that has worked for me to get me off the computer when my kiddos need me. good luck!

Hi, R.!

Try setting the timer on the microwave or oven for a an "allowed by you" computer time. You must then get up to turn the timer off. Make a list of what you need to accomplish that day, too. List your computer time on it, and mark it off when the time is up. Mark off your other duties as well and then feel good about your day!!

K. G

I know how you feel. Sometimes when you're home all day, the computer becomes a window to the outside/adult world. It's no substitute for the real life though, so...

1. Turn it off at night when you go to bed - or at least the monitor. Not seeing that bright screen there is a deterrent.

2. Avoid it first thing in the morning. The way you start your morning can really determine how your whole day will go. Get out of the house or plan a project that isn't near the computer.

3. Find other ways to meet those needs for interaction. Make new friends, find a coffeehouse you like, go the the library, join a mom's group.

Life's too short to spend the whole thing on the computer!

M. :)

OK... I'm probably not going to be very popular for this but...

I understand how you feel. I run my business from my home and need the computer/internet as well... I tend to get sucked into cyber-world myself, and because my kids (ages 6, 3, and 1) tend to play well for bursts of time by themselves it makes it even easier for me to be on the computer. To make it harder, I love those silly, addictive games on Facebook!

But I found that being on the computer is a choice. When I didn't make dinner one night and the kids came to me after playing outside and asked "where's dinner?" I had to pull my head out of my bahonkas. I had chosen to be on the computer instead of caring for my family and that was unacceptable to me. Now I am only on the computer 4 times a day, 5-6 a.m. and 10-11:15(ish) p.m. specifically for work, since the kids are sleeping and I can get more done, and then 2-15 minute bursts during the day, and these I have a timer to let me know when time is up. I can check my email on my phone, so I don't worry about customers emailing me during the day. So as other posters have said... make the choice and set limits on your computer time.

Also, if you say that being on the computer is a habit, then try something different. Instead of merely breaking the habit why don't you replace the bad habit with a better habit? (There's an old Latin proverb that says "habits are overcome by habits.") Instead of being on the computer, go and blow bubbles with your kids for 5 minutes or dust for a few minutes or even do 5 minutes of kickboxing (yeah, I love kickboxing!) It takes 30-45 days to break and create habits, so you'll have to keep at it. But just think to yourself, what is more important? My computer time or my family?
"Good habits, once established, are just as hard to break as are bad habits." - Robert Puller

Here's where I won't be so popular, 'cause I am not going to sugar-coat this...
Be the adult and make the choice. Set your priorities and stick with it.

R.
2 suggestions to try in tandem. Before you get on line make a list of what you need to do this will help you focus your time. Secondly set a timer, if you are giving yourself 30 minutes, fifteen minutes, an hour whatever your time limit is when the timer goes off you have to get up, turn the computer off and do something else. If you have someone that can make you accountable for that as well it may help.
Best of luck!

Maybe try to set up computer time as your "reward" at the end of the day. Don't even get on the computer until that designated time.

self control! also have you tried setting parental controls for yourself or have you tried setting a timer for 1/2 in the morning and 1/2 hour in the afternoon and 1/2 hour in the evening to start,
then decrease to either 15 minute intervals or only two intervals a day?

I only get on the computer when the kids are napping and only check four sites. I am usually on the computer less than 30 minutes. Try putting an egg timer next to your computer, set it, when it goes off walk away. Tell your hubby or someone you talk to daily what you are doing so they can keep you accountable.

If that won't work for you, you could make yourself a to do list everyday. Tell yourself you don't get computer time until everything is checked off. Don't forget to include fun time with the kids!!!

Good luck!

Hi R.,

You did not mention how old your kids are. If they are going to public school most of the day, I can see how an internet addiction can develop. You definitely want a balanced life. (If your kids are young and at home with you...I would be even more concerned for their safety)
What is it that draws you in so long? Contact with others, information, entertainment? Try to find things away from the screen that do the same for you. (Although I personally think that we entertain ourselves far too much in America...it's no wonder we have a reputation for being culturally myopic and self-absorbed)
You could try "training" yourself into new activities...make a goal schedule for yourself. Reward yourself for sticking with it. Set up "dates" with others so someone else is counting on you to show up. You will be more motivated to get there. Good luck!!

What I have to do is completly shut down the computer and walk away. Set the timer for yourself, so you have some computer time. Yes, it is addicting.

I think we're all guilty of this to some degree. I would go a step further and ask if you're using it as an escape from stress triggers - like kids, work, housework, etc. If so, then be honest about those feelings, and work to find out why you may feel overwhelmed. Computer time can be much like tv - it can let you veg out from your own life.

I would suggest using your free time on the computer (anything not related to work) be limited to a time-frame with a TIMER. Decide on a time of day or night that doesn't take you away from the family (nap-time or when hubby is at work) and let yourself have that time as YOURS. Be reasonable with the amount of time (1/2 hour to an hour at most).

Additionally, you can make a list of the things you like to do on the computer...is it games, research, email, Facebook - and designate which days you will do ONLY that activity. This will help keep you focused and make the best use of your time!

When you see it as a reward/treat, the guilty sense of pleasure will fade, and it will feel more positive!

Best,
C.

It may sound silly...but in the summer when my kids are home full time and I need to be accountable for their attention more.... I have found that I made a calender or events for us to do. I lay out M-F and lay out a schedule. Breakfast, Clean rooms, then I read them a story, do a craft, or library time/story time. Snack , then play a board game.... ect.... Then that way we are staying focused on a schedule, busy bees throughout the day...
Then when 2 or 3 pm comes and we all have our down time or tv time, I would be on the computer...next thing you know, it is dinner, bath, and bed. So It keeps me focused on the kids and it keeps them accountable to their stuff.

Maybe certain days try not turning the computer on at all...if it isn't turned on it won't be so easy to jump on it whenever you feel like it...good luck :)

I'm seriously considering asking my husband to take the laptop with him to work during the day so I'm not tempted to veg out on it for hours. It's the only thing I can think of that might actually work...because if the computer's in my home, I'm going to be on it. Period. My will-power is simply not enough.

Now if I just had the will-power to ASK him...

God help us all. ;-)

I agree with the other moms out there... Make it a point to only limit yourself to certain times during the day... this way you are able to still get some computer time, but it is not excessive. Find other ways to communicate with people...write a letter, go to a moms group, go to the library, coffee shop or go to the mall. Let the kids play on the play land there...Not sure how old they are... so I would plan around that. I go to school online, so, I see how it is easy to get caught up. So, limit your time, place a timer next to you and stick to it. When it dings, find something else to occupy your time...get out, have fun, life is short...!!!!