How to Handle Kids with ADHD Playing Sports.

I would try a different sport. As soon as my son gets the ok we are enrolling him in soccer-he performs SO much better and listens and learns when he's moving. Swimming would be great also. I think baseball-especially when children are young is hard even on kiddos without ADHD......So much waiting...waiting to bat, waiting for the ball to be hit etc.

I would not print out definitions of ADHD and give it to the coach. I have a 9 year old ADHD and a 7 year old-both in soccer. It's the 7 year old who's coach I feel sorry for. The younger kids have a very short attention Spanish. The 9 year old struggles, but saves most her complaints for me( oh joy).
I do not tell people outright that my kids are ADHD. I do not want them to use that as an excuse for their behavior either.

This coach is not a very good coach. I have had three children who grew up playing sports, regular and intense traveling teams. The normal community teams are for kids who want to try it and see if they like it. Last night I went to my grandsons' t-ball game, they are five and six and both on the same team. They do not have ADHD and the six year old is still twirling around, watching birds, picking dandelions, whatever caught his interest. He was certainly not the only one on the team doing that. The five year old is focused on the game every single minute. It is normal for this age. Some kids are really into the sports, some are not. It doesn't mean he shouldn't play and those coaches need to go to some training or something. I get that they are volunteers but if they want all the little kids to pay attention at all times they would be better off coaching a traveling team.

Baseball is hands down the WORST sport for my ADHD son. But its the only sport his dad likes... So he'd play it even if it involved laying on hot coals while being rubbed with salt & dashed in lemon juice. (Can we say 'Desperate for Approval' much?)

That said...

I was the unofficial team photographer for age 7 & 8.

He was the ONLY ADHD kid on the team.

I have photo series of EACH kid, at some point with
- Mitt on head or face
- throwing/ dribbling/ blowing grass
- ditto dirt
- upside down
- eating inanimate objects (ball, mitt, bat)
- climbing the dugout
- laying down while ball was in play

At the end of year party, I had a slides how that had all the baby pro shots (of course!) but ALSO

14 kids with their mitt on their face, 14 kids playing with grass, 14 kids playing with dirt, 14 kids upside down... Etc.

Those were the parent favorites.

Baseball is a BRUTAL sport for the age. If a kid messes up or gets distracted in soccer, basketball, etc... Its ongoing play with a pack of kids. There's some dispersed responsibility. In baseba... Each kid is singled out. Not only are the kids under ENOURMOUS pressure, but (even at age 10) the parents are in the stands clutching their bellies, crossing fingers, et cetera as "their kid" is IN that durn spotlight. (Kid pitch almost needs Xanax in the bleachers, as we're hanging onto each other. The parent of the pitcher -rotates each kid- is generally being patted/consoled by at least 4 other parents at any given time.

Its hard.

On them.

On us.

((My kid was the 3rd strike for losing the game last night. Oy. Poor kid!))

Play through.

I'm a gymnastics coach and we've had kids with ADHD on our teams. Here's how we handle it.

1. We talk with the parents about working together for discipline and positive reinforcement. Now, it's a team so we need to be fair to the other kids who are also there to learn and whose parents are paying. We're willing to work with the child, but not to the detriment of the other team members. For example, one child had a squeeze ball that she would squeeze while standing in line because it helped her to be able to wait. The other kids didn't think it was "fair" but we just explained that this person needed the ball, that it was their personal property so it should not be touched, and that they did NOT need squeeze balls too. They were fine with it.

2. If the ADHD child is too disruptive or the coach ends up paying too much attention to that child because of issues, then we require that they have an aid. It's the aid's job to handle the discipline and do the extra things needed. Then the coach is freed up to give everyone else equal attention.

I think having ADHD children participate in group sports is great for everyone! So many of our ADHD children improved by taking gymnastics. It also teaches tolerance to other kids. I think if the child is a disruption then you need to talk with the coach and come up with solutions together. It is not fair to the other children for the coach's attention to be monopolized by an ADHD child.

You could find a sport that's more action-packed for your child like soccer, tennis, gymnastics, swimming, martial arts, etc. If he enjoys hitting the ball then you might want to just take him to the batting cages for fun.

I also don't think it's uncommon for a REGULAR 6-year old to get bored standing in the outfield. Sheesh! That's NORMAL! Throwing dirt when bored is NORMAL! I also don't know where we came up with these high expectations for listening and following directions for young kids. It actually doesn't sound like your child has ADHD, he sounds like a normal, bored child! A six-year-old has a six minute attention span, if you're lucky! So also don't feel too bad about it. he sounds normal to me!

I love my kids dearly but for a sport like softball or baseball I give them a short acting dose of their meds for practice and games. Since it only stays in their system for three hours and the game is two....well sometimes we have trouble with sleep but the benefits outweigh the negatives.

Find my anyone who has ADHD and claims they stay engaged in these sports and I will show you a chronic lier! I kid sort of. It is by far the most boring sport on earth!

Thing is my kids feel bad when they zone out at the wrong time, they don't want to disappoint their coaches, and the meds take care of that.

Granted none of my kids coaches have ever been anything but understanding about getting bored easily. Their biggest concern is that they will zone out and get hit by a ball.
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Oh, once we get out of the pesky school year I just hold off giving them their long acting meds so that it wears off after the game. I actually like that better but I am pretty sure a note to the school, oh, Genna has a game tonight so here are her meds, don't give them to her until 11, yeah, can't see that going over well.

Ok, maybe baseball ISN'T the best choice. My daughter has ADHD and plays soccer. She'll s still easily distracted,but there 's not a lot of standing still. She'd probably also be playing oj the dirt if there was! The coach is wrong- it IS his job to handle his players. He also needs to understand ADHD and be tolerant of the situation. We've been blessed with a wonderful coach who has ADHD as well, so he understands and plays to our daughters strengths. It may be time to switch teams or even sports. In the meantime, maybe you could print out info on ADHD and give it to him. If that doesn't help, I'd talk to your league president-the coach should be more tolerant of what is technically considered a disability under the ADA. He wouldn't be yelling at a kid in a wheel chair to. Move faster, would he?

If your son isn't successful/ having fun / exposed to positive influences and experiences in baseball then pick a sport where the majority if his time he doesn't have to do something that's really hard for him to do.

Like swimming. Or soccer. Or tae kwon do.

Don't have him do something that's going to be tough for him AND the coaches AND the other teammates.

Wait, when my son did baseball at age 6 about half of the team was out to lunch. One little guy consistently ran the wrong way after batting. They are so little! Who cares. Now if he was throwing dirt AT someone it would be you responsibility to go help. The coaches are usually just volunteer parents and quite honestly only a handful can handle discipline AND coaching all the other kids at the same time. So, it would fall on you to help if your son is misbehaving to such a degree that it is hurting others or disrupting practice.

Try Lacrosse next spring. Way more moving!!

He is 6! ADHD or not! The coach sounds like a jerk.

For your sons next team choose the coach, not the team. Coaches should be patient and not too serious either in that age group. Truly, the guy sounds like someone I would avoid.

Baseball ... is a very stand-around kind of sport. One can easily get distracted standing out there in the field. (Heck, I can't even watch it from the stands or on TV :) I think your son needs a more busy-body sport, like basketball or yes, soccer. Something where you're running the whole time.

A decent chunk of the NHL has ADHD.

To be honest, he's 6. It's pretty normal. But I get your frustration. Most kids struggle with paying attention in baseball at 6. My son has ADHD and Aspergers so he was like the other kids with inattention but inattention on steroids. lol. My husband and I coached his team so it helped but we also had pretty much one parent volunteer for every 1.5 kids out there so that helped keep the kids focused. That saying I do understand where you are coming from but coaches are also volunteers and aren't always the most knowledgeable. What he said, though inappropriate, was probably a reaction out of frustration. Flash forward 6 years and every parent with kids with ADHD, aspergers, and other special needs wants my husband to be their kids coach. From personal experience don't just throw blanket info at the coach. Give him suggestions that you think might help your son stay focused. For us it was telling Shaun count the swings of the batter and picture himself swinging with him. He does it in his head now, thank God. I'm also very honest with people about Shaun's diagnosis. One, it helps the child and 2 you'd be surprised what experience someone else has with a similar diagnosis. But if your kid likes playing baseball don't give up on it. My son started out the same way and he is now playing on all star teams and going to try out for travel either next year or the year after and he's one of the top kids in his league. If he wants to play, talk to your league commissioner or Parks and Recs, whoever is doing this leagues, explain your situation and ask if they know of any coaches who can deal with things like this. But please don't tear his current coach apart. It's a hard job and they aren't paid. :-( But for the most part these people love the game and are trying to really help. Oh, nad for what its worth, a lot of MLB players have ADD and ADHD. Good luck.

Mom of 14 year old ADHD daughter here.
Steer your son towards sports where he moves, a LOT. Soccer, tennis, swimming, basketball, lacrosse, stuff like that. He will get a lot more out of activities where his natural tendencies are actually an advantage rather than a burden.
Signing him up for sports like baseball (even if he says that's what he wants to do) is almost certainly setting him up for failure. Part of parenting these kids is understanding where there strengths and weaknesses are, and guiding them along the way.
He's only six, you still have the final say. Give him some other, more appropriate options to choose from and he will find a lot more satisfaction and success.

If it's any consolation even kids without ADHD can have trouble with baseball at that age. I have two baseball players (and we love it at our house), but at that age my youngest was always picking clovers in the field or filling his cap with dirt. (I have photos of him playing in the outfield with his back to the infield and the batter!) At that age our teams were divided in two and played only 1/2 the field--1/2 in the dirt and 1/2 in the grass. I actually asked the coach to keep my son in the grass and off the dirt.

My husband has coached baseball for years and I don't think the coach handled it very well, but they are volunteers and maybe he was having a bad day. My husband has had numerous boys with ADHD or other issues on his teams. He usually tries to keep the practices lively and moving by having a variety of stations. During the game kids who are on the bench are sometimes allowed to be away from the field quietly playing catch. I don't know if this would make it worse or better, but it helps my son to chew on gum or sunflower seeds. I know that can introduce another set of problems for some kids (and coaches), but for my son it helped. Good luck!

I'm shocked at that coaches response.
My husband has managed or coached for years.
He knows when there are issues. Between the coaches and the parents, it has always worked out.
Honestly, at 6, they ALL want the "action" ALL of the time, from what I remember.
Is it possible for your husband to help out & be on the field, too? An uncle? Grandfather?
O. thing coaches DON'T like is to feel like they're babysitting. But seriously, at 6? I remember the endless reminders to sit on the bench, eye. In the dug out.
You might consider talking to your baseball board or player agent if his attitude remains poor. But, yes, then you'll be "that" mom.
Give it some time & keep reminding him!

It IS his job to handle his players when they are on the field and/ or dugout. It IS your job to teach your son to listen to directions (I understand that it a lot easier said than done especially with a ADHD child...it's hard enough with just a stubborn child).

I don't need to know the answer to this, but what ARE you doing to manage his ADHD? Is he medicated? If so, is it actually working properly or does it maybe need to be switched or dosage adjusted?

That said, 6 year olds do often fidgit in the field, picking daisies, catching frogs, and/or throwing dirt. But if it's more than that, maybe baseball isn't the right sport for him. What about soccer or karate?

The coach was a jerk and out of line, but at the end of the day, he's a volunteer and you know what they say...you can't complain unless you're willing to step up too. I would just chalk it up to him having a bad day and either he doesn't have much experience with this age (yes it is his job to address the behavior of all of the players) or has a short fuse and shouldn't be working with kids. A kid playing with dirt in the outfield is totally normal at your son's age and isn't going to affect the outcome of the game. That said...there's not much time left in the season so I'd just do the best you can with reminding your son to not throw dirt. Maybe there's a song he can sing in his head or something he can count that will help keep him from zoning out and playing with the dirt?

I would recommend that you find only fast-paced sports for your son. My oldest has ADHD and baseball was horrifically boring for him. Heck, it's boring for everyone until they all get old enough to actually play the game well, which doesn't happen until around age 10. That's a long time to suffer through a miserably boring sport.

So what's better? In my family, spring = lacrosse. It's an awesome, fast-paced game with no downtime. My kids also play soccer and basketball. My oldest settled into hockey a few years ago and that's pretty much his only sport, played 8 months a year (a regular season goes from late August to early April) plus off-season conditioning in the summer.

So just do your best for the rest of the season and then find more exciting sports in the future. ADHD and sports can be a great combination, you just have to find the right sports.

As Riley said, that is the worst sport for an ADHD kids, even kids who get bored easily. Hell, it's boring as heck sitting out there with nothing to do, can you blame the kid?

Honestly, look into other sports where there is more action: soccer, basketball, football, swimming, anything that keeps him moving.

As to how to handle it.....not much, when my played it was pretty normal to see the outfield kids sitting around picking at the grass, throwing dirt, tossing their mitt's. My kids quit cause it's just to slow for them.

The coach was out of line. I'd report him for being rude. He was doing and saying things that were not needed.

First of all, baseballs about having fun. If it's not fun then none of the kids need to be playing. Even when I was playing a highly competitive game it was exciting and fun. This coach sounds like he is not very interested in having fun.

Your son is doing natural stuff. He's not running around and goofing off turning flips or anything so it could be worse...lol.

I think you need to tell the coach to stick his opinion up his hiney, in a nice way of course but he's ignorant of what boys are like.

I bet by next year your son will start acting a bit different. It's a natural developmental stage at about that time. Freud called it the Latency Period. Sexual stuff aside, he said it was a time where the brain changes and it starts absorbing knowledge left and right. I think it's rather like a sponge at that time. They start sitting down and you can't keep them from learning everything you put in front of them. It's an awesome change to watch their brain go through.

I have always like to teach kindergartners in child care. They come in pre-school aged kids mentally and go out when this stage is just starting. If I kept them all summer until they went into first grade I could see the world suddenly open up to them.

He'll settle down some, tell them baseball's supposed to be fun and to leave him alone.

My son (also 6, also with ADHD) really wanted to play t-ball, so we tried it. Failed miserably. He was kicked out after the 3rd session. He was kicked out of soccer after 2 sessions. He was even kicked out of karate (I think the class size was far too big for him). He's done great with swimming.

That being said, I have noticed that his ability to focus varies greatly according to the time of the day. If it is an after school activity, it will likely be a fail. If it is a Saturday morning, it will probably go well. Is your son's baseball in the afternoon? If so, you might want to consider switching to a weekends-only team.

Hi, A.:

The coach is correct in stating that it's not his job to train your son.

Have you asked your son what causes him to throw the dirt?
Check out a Narrative Therapist to take him to.
Your son needs to learn skills to achieve his desired goals in life.
A Narrative Therapist is more able to identify the problem and help determine solutions.
Good luck.
D.

The coach probably didn't handle things in the most professional manner. But if your son does this often, even after being asked to stop repeatedly, I can understand that the coach is frustrated. And you are correct, most of us that don't live with it, don't fully understand ADHD. So instead of telling the coach to "punish him", give him some tools he can use. In my experience (three years of tee ball/little league), punishment is generally making a child sit out. If your child doesn't do well "idle", then it's probable that this is not the best punishment for him. Work with the coach, and come up with a plan that will work for both of you. Throwing dirt, does cause problems. It blows in the other team members faces...not life threatening, but annoying and uncomfortable.

We had a kiddo on our team who was like this too. Waiting was torture and always turned into bad choices. So our coach found a stressball that looked like a little baseball. When this child had to wait, the coach would quietly hand him the ball. He played with that instead of kicking dirt, spinning the bat, tossing his glove and the other "time killers" he used to do. I wonder if there might be a better way to channel his energy.

And it's just possible that baseball isn't a great match for him. He may need something a little faster paced. Let's face it, there is a great deal of standing around in little league. And that' no reflection of you, your kid or ADHD, it's just a fact. Not every sport fits every kid. My son has interest in playing soccer. I cringe at that idea, because I know he would not be able to keep up with all that running!

The coach was definitely unprofessional and rude, there is no doubt. Use this as a teaching opportunity. Maybe you can give him some tools that will make him a better coach.

I am sorry this happened. I think tball is not the right sport at this age for your son. Wait til he gets more impulse control. Tball is hard for most 6 year olds..let alone one with ADHD.

Summer is around the corner. Do you have a neighborhood swimteam he can join?? We have one and our kids have started already. It is a great sport, involves constant total body control, keeps them busy the entire time, there is no dirt to toss around :), they get totally exhausted at each practice which makes for great sleeping ;) and so many more benefits. I have noticed that swimteam parents are totally chill...it is so relaxing sitting by the side of the pool.

Look into it!! It is a great life saving skill to swim well as well as a great workout.

If tball is turning into a battle with your son and a battle with the coach then you need to find something else. You are having your own battles each day with your son trying to help him and his ADHD.

I wish you the best. You are doing a great job!!

I would try another sport.

How about Tennis?
It is a good sport.
Active.
Not dependent on a "team" of many others, like with baseball or soccer. No idle time just standing around getting bored.
My son takes Tennis and loves it.
He likes, "individual" sports.
No he is not ADHD, but he is 6. And super active.
And, tennis is even something you can do WITH, your son.
Or as a family.
My daughter who takes Karate, has some ADHD kids in her class as well as a high functioning Aspberger's kid.
They do fine.
The teachers are aware of it, because the parents tell them.

Also, maybe working with a Skills Trainer would be good for your son.
Not just a Psychiatrist. They prescribe meds. Therapists/skills trainers, work on social skills and managing.

How does he do in school????
Does he have an Aide there?
Lots of ADHD kids at my kids' school.
They all have Aides with them in class. It helps.

Teach your son, that him not playing baseball is NOT a bad thing or "because" he has ADHD. But it is about, finding a good "fit" for him. So many sports are available. Choosing the right fit for him.

Not everyone will even know or understand what ADHD is.
So sure it will be frustrating.
But not all people are, irked with it.
At my daughter's Karate school, the other kids and the Sensei teachers, just treat them the same as any other kid.

OMG that brought back memories. Kids that young get bored. My daughter would get bored sit down in the dirt. Use to drive me crazy only because it was red dirt and they had white pants. Fun Fun laundry time. I'd try a tumbling class. Boys and girls both do tumbling at that age. Also Karate. Soccer didnt work out to well when she was 6 she wasnt the type to just chase a ball. Funny enough now that she is older and more in control she has gone back to soccer and loves it. But comming from a parent who has a hyper child who can loose focus, tumbling classes and karate will help alot. Also for his age how bout Pee Wee hockey. Man he can run wild on the ice. My daugther loves ice skating.

Coach didn't handle it well, but baseball probably isn't a good sport for him. Soccer would probably be fantastic. Lots of running, no "standing around," etc.

coaches are volunteers, not trained professionals. it's NOT his job to know what to do. that being said, i think you handled it exactly right by telling him he has permission to take what action he sees fit.
i think the best thing to do is to request a few minutes of the coach's time (do not demand! be courteous about it) and enlist his help in brainstorming a few coping techniques. i'm not sure what they might be. benching a ADHD kid doesn't seem effective, but the coach is right, there's just no way that doodling around in the field and not paying attention to the game is okay for a team sport. my boys both did it in t-ball, and being called out for it by the coach was how they learned to knock it off.
it may be that your kid is just too wiggly for a sport that has big lapses of downtime the way that baseball does. if there's a batter up who fouls the ball 20 times in a row, the best outfielders might lose focus. so you need to decide if this is something your child can realistically handle, bearing in mind that in a team sport, what's best for your child is not the only factor.
ETA- it's not 'punishment' to pull him out unless you frame it that way. as parents it's our job to decide what's appropriate and what works for our kids. i do not understand why he HAS to go out for soccer if he plays baseball. what does one thing have to do with the other?
khairete
S.

if he really wants to play baseball, look into an adaptive program for next year.

OR check what rules are and see if he can have someone standing next to him the whole game.

Coach was not right. However, you said it in the first place. Baseball requires a lot of standing sitting around. Obviously that is not for him. You have to match the child and sport. Coaches cannot discipline the kids, he has a job to do nor can he have kids throwing around dirt. Time to find something else for him to do. Martial arts is the best thing for these kids.
Never met one who did not do well. Worth a try.