How Do I Keep My 1St Grader Focused?

The book DISCOVER YOUR CHILD's LEARNING STYLE (Children learn in unique ways) by Mariaemma Pelullo Willis & Victoria Kindle Hodson is a great book to help you figure out your child's needs.
http://www.learningsuccessinstitute.com/

I just took their great 3 day workshop in Ventura and I think every parent should read their book.

Years go (just FYI) kindergarteners and 1st graders and 2 + did not have homework... this is new and not necessarily the best after a full day of paperwork.

Personally, I let the K homework completely slide... 1st... 2nd... but now my 8 yr old is in 3rd grade and we have a high producer teacher, who expects more, so now we're doing it... fine by me... because he can handle it. The class however, has given me great tips on how to handle issues that come up.

As a kindergarten teacher, a technique I often use in the classroom and recommend to parents is setting a timer. Start off with small blocks of time - 5 - 10 minutes. If she works without disruption, give her a short break. Bring her back and set the timer again. Be sure to start with small goals that you know she will be able to meet. As she consistently meets her goals, lengthen the amount of time.

Be sure to reward her progress and praise her every time she meets her goal. Often times the reward is much more successful than punishment.

It sounds like she wants your attention - positive or negative. Reward her with activities designed for just the two of you - work a puzzle together, play a game, let her help you make dinner.

She may just be tired and need a nap.
Children at this age, still benefit from a nap. My girl is 5 going on 6 years old, in the 1st Grade, and still naps after school. She is napping now in fact.

Kids this age are tired after a full day at school... they come home and need to deflate and unwind. For my girl, we come home, I give her a meal or snack (she is famished after school), then I let her choose what she wants to watch or play with and let her have time to unwind. THEN, she takes a nap. She is t-i-r-e-d after school and will even tell me she "needs to nap."

THEN, after she naps, we do homework. At this point, after being rested, she is MUCH more attentive and can focus. Otherwise, she is just too "over-tired." Overtired kids are actually more "hyper" and fussy and grumpy and argumentative....AND distracted.

This routine works for my girl and me. It's much less of a struggle.

I noticed that you said "she" does homework in the kitchen....or "she" tried going in her room to do homework etc. - so it seems like it is a "she" doing homework by herself thing... versus a "we" work on homework kind of thing. THIS MAY be the "problem."

For example:I sit with my girl in her room at her desk, and WE do the homework. At this age they still need us to help them.... and answer any questions. Sure, my girl does her homework by herself... but I am there for support and supervision and clarifying things. I actually sit there with her. This way, she is more inclined to feel actually doing it, and "we" get her homework done quicker that way.

At this age, I still feel a child needs the Parent to sit with them and do it. They are independent but not that much so to where they can regulate themselves.

Perhaps also, she seems to have a lot on her plate as far as scheduling??? I'm not criticizing... but at this age, they can really get ragged. And if she is missing her tv time... then maybe something has to give???? Kids need downtime... and just being. It's important for them to just be, too. Maybe she can take her gymnastics on the weekend instead? ..I imagine that after a long day at school, then having t do homework before gymnastics or the pool... then after that's done, coming home, at night, being tired after all that, THEN having to get ready for bed and that whole routine.... when and how can she just deflate or hang-out and unwind? And by this time, she must really be tired or worn out.

For my girl, she also needs time to chat with me afterschool... that is her way of re-grouping about the day,and it relaxes her. So that's what we do. ALSO, it never works well when I "rush" her to do things or get her things done. Rushing my girl NEVER works and it only makes her more frustrated... hence we can't get focused on her homework. I have learned to "know" her rhythms... and how she responds best in order to perform. Each child is different.

We do the SAME routine everyday... and so I rarely have to force it or pressure my girl to get things done and it works out.

If your girl is taking 2 hours to finish 2 worksheets... SOMETHING has to give. To me. For 1st Grade... homework is not meant to take 2 hours.

I think your girl is just too tired after school to focus. I really feel she "needs" some down-time. And maybe hungry too, maybe she needs more than a snack after school. Remember, in 1st Grade lunch is early (at my girl's school, 1st Grader's have lunch at 11:30, and school ends at 2:15. (and usually kids don't eat much in the cafeteria, sometimes none at all). That is a long time to go without a snack or another "meal" for a child. They are active in school, physically & mentally... and by the time they come home after school, they are hungry and thirsty and tired. That combination of things does not make for a "focused" child.

Good luck and all the best. Just some ideas about what we do, and seems to work with my girl. Sorry for rambling...
Susan

Hi M.,
You have had some great advice so far but I will just add my own experience. It is a great sign that your daughter is thriving well at school. Homework has increased dramatically for young children and it is not that useful for some of them, especially the brightest kids! Your daughter may have already learned the material during the school day and finds it boring to write it out again at home. Although minimizing distraction during homework time is helpful, get creative with the format: let her read one question for you to answer, then you read one for her to answer. Have her "teach" you something that she learned at school that pertains to the homework. Praise her when she completes an assignment. If she seems restless, give her a jump rope and let her have 10 jumps (or some other quick activity)after she accomplishes half of a page. Then steer her quickly back to the assignment with an interesting question, anything that gets her brain back in gear. Let her tell you what her favorite part of the lesson is and also what she does not enjoy. Support her as much as you can, but do try to set a limit on the time spent. Tell her what she can look forward to upon completion. For her readiing, give her the chance to be the "teacher" amd she can read to you and her sister while you two are the students. All of these tactics may increase her confidence and make the homework seem more like play.
I would also get proactive at the school and suggest minimizing the homework load, since I strongly believe too much can lead to burnout. As the mother of three gifted children who are all "slow" workers, I have seen their frustration over doing pointless work. Fortunately, they have all been top achievers and two are now in college and loving it. Happy educating and best of luck to you!

Hi M., remove all distractions, and try and find a place to do the home work, where it is quiet, my kids always had they own little table inthe living room with all their art supplies and stuff, and that's where they did their home work, in their own little space. When your daughter is tired of missing the things she enjoys most becasue of not staying focussed on her homework I believe she ill turn it around. J. L,

Hi Mary beth:
You've recieved some very good advice. I loved the ideas from both Sarah and SH. I think,kids do need some time to unwind after school.Unwind,and a little fuel food.A half hour isn't much,after she has been at school all day.I agree with Sarah,as I know, at this young age, childrens attention spans are limited.They have trouble concentrating on any one thing for to long. They lose interest quickly.I'd have her work for a while, then give her a break. I'd take the teachers idea and try it out for a while. I bet you see progress.I wish you and your daughter the best

If you haven't done so already, make sure that she has a certain place and time that she is supposed to do homework. And make sure that the table that she is working at his kid-sized and free from distraction. From what you posted,, she clearly is very good at looking for possible ways to get out of doing homework, so anticipate that in advance and take her excuses away from her.

I know that it's not fair that our kids are getting homework starting in kindergarten when I don't remember receiving home work until I was in 5th grade, but this is the way of he world and the world doesn't conform around us - we need to conform around it. More is expected from kids now days because of the No Child Left Behind Act but, frankly, what's expected from a 1st grader at this point shoudn't be that big of a deal and shouldn't take more than 20 to 30 minutes to complete. This is the easy part of your daugter's education and, if she is taking 2 or more hours to complete it, she is yanking your chain and you need to pull in the reins. As she gets older, more is is going to be required of her so mind-as-wlll nip this delaying tactic in the bud while you can.

Also, don' forget that in the here and now, rewards really do work wonders. Set the timer for 20 to 30 minutes (whatever your teacher recommends) and if she is able to complete the assignment before the timer goes off, reward her with a special prize like desert or a cheap present from the dollar store. Once she is ready for delayed gratification, up the ante to a Saturday visiti to Chuck E. Cheese if she does her homework without a fuss and within 30 minutes during the entire 5 days, of whatever it is her currency is (for my daughter it would be a tube of Bonnie Bell Lip Smackers).

Hope this helps.

L. in Sin City

I had and still have the same problem with my son. He is now in 3rd grade what I found was that his homewrok was not challenging so I found ways to motivate him to get his work done, speciall games he likes to play with me or the family, a trip to the bookstore at the end of the week if he did his homework well. We also put a clock next to hiom and began giving him time missions. We would tell him okay today your a special agent and you have to get this done before the time limit or your mission fails and then if he did it we would play special agent afterward. You have a girl so maybe you could invent something she would relate to better but that seems to work with my youngest. He is a day dreamer and will find every itch on his body before digging in.