How Can I Start Dating Again Without Feeling

You need a social life, but speaking from experience as the kid of a dating mom who was on the selfish side, you need to decide what you want to do. Do you want to have adult friends and enjoy adult time, or are you looking for a longterm relationship/potential spouse? If the first, just keep the dating life separate. The kids don't need to be involved with your adult friends. If the 2nd, remember that everyone you become seriously involved with must realize that they are involved with you AND your children. You're not just you, you're a family unit, and whoever you date needs to understand that. OH, and don't introduce the SO until you're engaged, and make it a long engagement. It's torture as a child to let down your guard, get close to someone who "might" become family, and then have them disappear - over, and over again.

Your kids are yours forever; be careful with their emotions. Take care of yourself as well and enjoy your life. :)

Perhaps try thinking of it as going out to have a good time with a friend. Dating, today, implies a willingness to have sex, and if you're feeling guilty getting sexually involved will not feel good.

So, start out having fun with friends. Be aware that you feel guilty, accept the feeling, and have fun anyway. Gradually the guilty feeling will subside.

I speak from experience.

Going out is a social activity no different than taking kids to a park. No one's saying to do it 5 nights a week (esp if u have kids) but you deserve to have fun just like everyone else in the world, mommy or not.
I'm assuming u have a child(ren) so just know that your decisions don't only affect you, they affect the kids as well. With that said, just be careful of who and how often you bring a potential significant other (if that's what you're looking for) around your kid(s).

ZK, I want you to know I appreciate this question as it made me do a double take on my self. YOU WORDED IT PERFECTLY! ////guilty///// I know this is going to sound like I am changing this to be all about me and its not its about your needs but you made me think of a area of life tht I swore was closed and maybe is not. My husband of 40 years --we were one of those couples that dated in High School and went to the Jr. Prom together! This man of mine passed away after a lengthy illness of 16 years. We have mostly adult children with several grandchildren. Your question is really important becasue you can never go out with someone else with out the shadow of the past relationship and be it great or bad its what you know. I know for me I would like as I tell my girl friends a "friend" that I can go walking with and talk with but not anything else. I really do alright by myself and don't need a man to fel complete. I have not a clue how to consider another relationship. My children are mostly grown and he'd have to get past them( most of the family are cops), then muster up with thegrandchildren ~~as he would not just be dating a 59 year old woman but an entire family of people that adored my husband.
So that you for expressing your concerns so that I could be thinking about mine. I wish you plenty of luck and no bad experiances.
Set your boundries, and standards and ten stick to them, no man is worth your self esteem or self espect.. But please keep the children out of it is's not healthy for any of you.

why do you feel guilty for being human. there is nothing wrong with going out. you will be happier when you do. there is more to life than just being a mom with babies and no life. dont let anyone tell you you shouldnt go out cause if they do tell you that it is just cause they dont want you to be happy. if you have kids look at it like this that person can help you with the kids.

Like Patricia G..my mother dated after her divorce. A lot. She left me watching her younger children, my brothers and sisters. She didn't remarry until after we were grown. She at times stayed out all night and didn't come home.She didn't have the issue have and I wouldn't have worrying about it. You, on the other hand have a conscience and sound kind hearted. I think you should go out and have fun, but if you have children make sure they are safely taken care of or if there is an ex, work it out on the weekends he has them. You need to have fun to be a good mom. My mother took advantage of that and I love her but will never call her really a good mom. She was very into herself, actually still is despite getting older. You sound like a good person or you wouldn't feel bad about this. Have fun!