Holding the Bottle by Himself

My son was the same way. He didn't really start feeding himself until he was about 1, now he's 20 months and feeds himself like a champ. He also was slow on learning to tip the bottle by himself, but he does that fine now as well. I think this may just be an area where he is going a little slower, which is completely fine. He's so independent now, that I kind of miss those days where he would sit still and let me feed him his bottle. I say cherish it now, for soon he will get the hang of it and want to do everything by himself.

This is very normal because most likely he is more full from the food and does not want the milk as much. If at all he will most likely take it at bed time. The close he gets to 12 months he will not want it at all because his taste buds start to change because of the flavors from the foods he is eating and that formula does not taste good any more. Once he is 12 months he should go on Vitamin D milk any way which should be given starting out in a sippy cup the winged off into a regular cup. Hope this helps.

Some babies never hold their own bottles. The fact that he holds a sippy cup is great, and he will learn with time to tip it on his own. Being born early some things may be delayed but by the age of 2 he should be completely caught up on all aspects of development.

My oldest started used his cup at 9 months, so if he'll take it from his cup then let him. I thought his doctor was crazy when she said to start him on a cup at 9months. When he turned 12months he didn't mind that the bottle and pacifiers where gone. Maybe he'll still use the bottle at night. Good luck. A cup that should be good for his age is the Playtex my 1st sippy cup.

I was a nanny and the parents I worked for found bottle holder (1 frog/1 duck) these made it easier for her to hold the bottle on her own with out it slipping it also had legs on it so it kinda help tip it up enough.

L. - We are having ths same challenge. My daughter is 9 months old, eats very well, and will feed herself the things she can pick up but is not interersted in using the spoon herself or feeding herself her bottle. We can get her to hold it once ina while but she does not hold it up enough for anything to come out and as soon as we offer help she lets go. Let me know what you find out. Thanks!

L. (Centreville, VA)

Mom, he may just need that cuddling! As far as him flinging the bottle, well it might be time to just use the sippy cup! If you can get him to sleep at naps and night with a drink before bed, and he sleeps through the night, why worry if he doesn't hold the bottle?

Each child is different. Some never hold a bottle, and that is okay, unless you are concerned about weakness in his arms and hands, if that is the case talk to his doctor.

Many blessings. Joyce

Hi L.-

I have two preemies now. My first daughter was born 11 weeks early, so I know what you're going through. Carmella never held the bottle on her own. We eventually just weened her off the bottle and taught her to use a sippy cup with double handles. I believe we did this around 12 months old. If you are tired of holding the bottle, we used to prop Carmella's up with dish towels on her high chair. That seemed to work fine for her.

I thought my daughter was behind at doing things such as crawling and walking. She crawled at the end of 10 months and walked at 13 months. However, once I talked to other moms, I realized she was actually on target. Don't compare her to any other children. I learned to just accept the milestones when they come. You'll know when to be worried. If you don't, your pediatrician sure will. You have to remember that at 10 months old, you have to actually compare him to other 8 month olds to adjust for his prematurity.

Hope this helps-
C.

Remember that because he is 2 months premature, that his development may be 2 months behind. 8 months is still appropriate for being fed by parents as well as not being interested in other self feeding activities. Unless he is showing other signs of motor or other delays, I wouldn't worry too much.

I would focus more on transitioning to a cup rather than having him accept the bottle on his own if he is rejecting this activity. Try the Nubby cups with the soft spout. You can also try little paper cups with water in them if you want to skip the sippy all together. As to self feeding, try things he can easily pick up like cheerios or the Gerber puffs.

If he's not by the books with his age adjusted for prematurity at his next check up, then ask the doctor for a referral for evaluation, or contact the special ed department at your local public schools for their early intervention services. They either come to your home for therapy services or you go to the school depending on where you live. My stepson was in early childhood special ed since before his third birthday because of developmental delays and he was 2 months premature as well. The prematurity was a factor in being able to secure services for him. It doesn't cost anything for the evaluation through the schools and if you disagree with their findings, you can appeal and have a private, independent evaluation done at the school's expense.

He probably just associates the bottle with comfort as most babies do. Don't rush him, he will hold it on his own when he is ready, he may just need the comfort for now.

As for holding spoons, etc, that takes time. My son is 17 months and has just started doing that on his own, before he would just throw it! He is in no way developmentally delayed as he is highly athletic and started walking at 9 mos, so that is not the issue with your son.

Kids are very smart and just need to do things at their own pace sometimes. Eventually he won't want anything to do with you feeding him, just let him take his time to get there. They grow up so fast as it is!

My son, born almost a month early, and is now 2 1/2 did the exact same thing. He NEVER held his own bottle but did fine with a sippy cup. I would not stress over it. Soon you will be weaning him off of his bottle anyway. Hope that gives you some comfort :)

Hi! I only have one child who is coming up on a year next week but it wasnt too long before his 10 month date (more like around 9 months or so I think) that he finally started holding his bottle. Funny thing is he would hold his bottle for our sitter but not for me, till I finally took a stand and just kept putting his hands on the bottle and refused to hold it for him. Now he holds it no problem. Also, he just transitioned completely to sippy cup at around 11 month but is still getting the hang of tipping it up rather than reclining... but he tries. Anyways, it could just be that he is so used to you holding the bottlle that you just need to take a firm stand... it took us about 2 weeks and he all of a sudden just started doing it. I think its very normal at his age to be going through this... besides, one of the ladies here at work has an 18 month old who still uses a bottle... so whenever I feel that 'mommy competition' i just think of little things like that and remember that every child is different. Also... I cant believe that your little boy is already eating table food!! We are just starting my son on table food and I am always afraid hes not eating enough...but apparently he is. Personally, i think for being born 2 months early and being 10 months old, your son is probably further along than quite a few other kids :)

My daughter is 16 months old and always refused to hold her bottle, but like your son she wanted to hold her sippy cup. When she was about 10 months I just finally gave up trying to get her to hold her bottle becasue I knew in a few months she would be off the bottle. Trust me I know is frustrating but I just enjoyed the cuddling because now she doesnt really want to cuddle she wants to run. I hope this helps.

I would imagine that he relates having the bottle with cuddle time, and there is ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong with that. Remember that he IS in daycare, and he probably wants every morsel of attention he can get when he is home. Don't worry about this, it is perfectly normal. Just cater to the little guy. There is nothing wrong with him wanting your affection. You can't compare your child to others. All children are different. Wouldn't you rather have an affectionate child than one who is too independent? You are worrying too much about nothing. He is trying to tell you he wants you to hold him.

My youngest was about your son's age when she started to refuse the bottle. She was drinking fine from a cup, so I just started putting everything in a cup for her. By 11 months, she had completely given up the bottle and was doing great.

From working in the day care, I have learned that some babies are just stubborn when it comes to doing things for themselves.

As far as is this normal for his age...it is normal for him. Every baby develops at their own pace. He will get it when he gets it. It doesnt sound to me like there is any significant delays (but I am not a doctor). I say if he is still having a hard time with things at his next doctors appointment, point it out to your pediatrician and they will let you know if there is a reason to be concerned.

L., you might try a sippy cup with a straw. That way he doesn't have to tip it at all. We started our guy on those sippies because that's all he'd take, he didn't like the hard ones. He's since graduated to the hard ones, but loved his sippy with a straw.

Hi L.,
I'm a mom to three beautiful girls and nursed the first two, but used a bottle for the third. It never occured to me that she should be able to hold the bottle by herself until around 8 or 9 months the caregiver at the gym I went to started "helping" her learn to hold it. Helping her along with a blankie under the bottle and placing her hands on the bottle. She was always in a reclining position but never lying flat (bouncy seat, swing). Maybe the caregivers at daycare could try to get him to hold the bottle on his own. He wants to snuggle with you. Who could blame him! This might get negative responses, but I propped the bottle while my daughter was in the swing. I was always in sight, but had little choice with two older children and my husband is always away. She got use to eating without me feeding her and eventually preferred it.