Help with Toddler

My question is WHY does she start to cry when you pull into the drive way??? Is there something going on in the house that causes her to be scared or not want to be there so when she gets back she fights going in? Something to think about if she is normally happy and well behaved...

I agree with Sara B - you need to figure out if there is a REAL reason for her crying or if it's just a ploy to stay longer on the outing. My girls (4 and 2) fight leaving Grandma's house, and also sometimes refuse to get out of the car at home if they know it's around naptime and I will make them nap when they get inside. I usually just leave them in the car (doors open), unbuckled, and tell them to come in when they're ready. Sometimes this works, sometimes it doesn't. Usually they don't like being left by themselves and follow me inside.

So, I suggest you have a little chat with your daughter about why she gets upset (don't mention crying) when you get to the driveway. Do it at a non-driving time when you're still at home and not planning to go out so that she doesn't think her answer will affect your planned activities. Those 4 year olds are pretty crafty & smart that way!
It could be something as simple as she thinks a tree is scary or she tripped on the pavement once and doesn't want to do it again. Or maybe she doesn't like the color of your house? Heehee. My daughter wants us to paint our house purple like a princess castle.

If all else fails, try the "big sister" approach - "Honey, you need to stop crying when we get to our house because it scares your sister (or brother). She looks up to you and wants to be like you because your her big sister. So let's set a good example for (name) and sing a song instead (or other activity)."

Hope you find your answers!

Ignore her wails. If it's that disturbing, turn up the radio. Maybe you could give her a walkman to listen to on the return home. Kinda like a distraction. Good luck.

I like the responses you got so far. My 5 yr old son can be stubborn. On occassion when he refuses to listen, I will tell him, well if you don't want to behave and follow the rules, you can go outside. I tell him until he wants to follow the rules of the house he can stay out. It isn't long before he starts behaving. If my daughter were doing that, I'd probably tell her that if you want to cry like a baby then you can sit in the car or outside until you can behave like a big girl. Good luck with that!

My 4 yr old daughter would do the Same thing! I finally found out it was because she didint want our morning outings to end. When school started last year, after we would drop off her older brother at school,we would go to Mcdonalds or walmart to shop. Well on days that we would do that she would get SO upset when she would see that we were headed home. But once we got inside she was fine. Shes doing better so i think shes growing out of it.Hope yours does too.

just from the driveway to the house? so just maybe ten, fifteen seconds? try humor. or crying along with her. when my kids do things that seem a little off, i look at my behavior as an "experiment", almost. because so many times the traditional things don't work (prepare, bribe, punish). so try something a little wacky. blare her favorite music for her as you are driving home and sing along? anything that will catch her attention. i think that maybe once she knows that you are ok with her, she might start, just start, to be ok with whatever is bugging her and will change her behavior slowly.

Funny...I was thinking the same thing as the prior response. I would fake cry as your coming down the street...really loud and silly.."NOT home again...what am I going to do...walk all the way to the front door...I won't do it...you can't make me, etc".

Now, I had a rough morning w/ my son(just turned 4) a few days ago. I listened to his rantings all the way to my other son's school and back home. So, to change his mindset before we got back into the house, I told him that mama would have her hands too full of stuff to be able to unlock the front door. I stopped before we went down the street and took my house key off the ring and handed it to him. I showed him how to hold it to get the key to fit. He did it w/ no prob and was SO proud. Now I just ask him if he wants to unlock the door for me as we're coming down the street. I hand him the keys when I take them out of the truck. Good luck!

M.,

LOL you are so blessed to have such a wonderful little girl. And if this is the only problem you have....horray. You lucky duck.lol,

Well here is my 2cents. It sounds to me like your little girl loves to leave the house. And when returning home, she is just not ready to end the adventure of an outing. I could only imagine that you daughter is very social with other children as well, if she enjoys being out of the house this much...my thought and question to you is, Have you considered a Mothers Day Out Program for her? Most are just two days a week. This out let with give her a chance to get out of the house, met some children her own age, develope entry skills for school(if that is what you plan to do). And it's also a great way for you to met other Mom's with children the same ages that have many things in common with yourself.

I taught at a Mothers Day Out program for years. I taught two and three year olds. It was so much fun. My two children got to attend for free because I was a teacher their. And after the entered public school I continued to teach. I such wonderful memories of so many of my studants. Thinking back to all of that makes me smile.

Here is a funny little story I always remember....It was lunch time, and after I helped each child set out their boxed lunches, I opened mine. It was a salad, and a cut up cantalop.
One little girl asked "Mrs. Yara, what's that?" refering to the cantalop. And I said to her "this is cantalop". And the little girl replied back "Well I love camel lopes, can I have some?"

Isn't that so funny. I love little kids. Well best of luck to you and I hope this has helped in any way.