Help! My 3 Yr Old Will Not Sleep at Night!

It would help to know what you have tired so far. My son (almost 5) has been waking up in the middle of the night this week but he usually will go back to sleep in a little while if I sit by his bed. If he has had a chance to use the bathroom, get a drink of water and maybe a snack (something healthy and unexciting like fruit or crackers) then take him back to bed or at least too his room. I have been known to sit in the hallway outside my son's door and read for 20-30 minutes when he is giving me trouble about going to sleep.

I do wonder if there might be a food sensitivity issue mixed in with the rest of the problem.

I agree with Lisa D. in that I would take him to see a doctor. This seems so extreme, not just a "battle of wills" or usual reluctance to sleep. 20 hours without sleep is not something that a young child could normally do, they would eventually just crash no matter how much they didn't want to.

Try this homeopathic remedy. About half an hour before you want him to go to sleep give him Chamomile 30c two pellets under the tongue. Do not touch the pellets with your hands. Put them on a plastic spoon or directly from the cap of the plastic bottle. He will become relaxed and very likely fall asleep. Do this every night for several weeks.
If this does not work you have to find a homeopath to give him a remedy that is right for his mental, physical and emotional life.

Do you have a regular schedule that you enforce daily? One that provides for a daily routine getting ready for bed, then it's to bed, lights out, perhaps some soft music. Do you spend 15-20 minutes with him helping him to unwind and relax? Read together or talk while he bathes. Then quietly return him to his room, require that the lights stay out and leave him there, over and over, every night until he gets it. No conversation after the first time in bed.

Is your home quiet in the evening? Is everyone getting along or is there a lot of stress before bedtime? Does he watch TV with the grown ups or older kids instead of spending time with mom or dad?

The atmosphere has to be conducive for rest and the routine has to happen every night. I've not known anyone, adult, child, or toddler to stay awake for that long without the use of some sort of stimulant. If a consistent routine and a quiet home doesn't work, I suggest that he may have a medical problem and suggest you take him to see his pediatrician.

If after a couple of weeks of quiet routine and the doctor says he's OK, I suggest that you make his room safe and that you go back to bed leaving him in his room to play or do whatever that he does when he's awake. Use a gate or even lock the door. You have to get more rest so that you can deal with life and deal with him in a calm, confident manner.

Is it possible that getting him to sleep has become a battle of wills. If so, back off and let him play in his room as I suggested in the above paragraph.

Have you talked to your pediatrician about this? This does not sound like normal sleep issues to me. Waking up at 1 am and staying up for 20 hrs straight is a huge red flag, IMO. It seems to be like there's something else going on - diet/allergy/chemical sensitivity/??? I really have no idea but if I were you I would get him checked out. Take him to the doctor and see if they can help you find out what's going on. I am so sorry you are going through this - you both must be miserable. I'm hoping you're able to find some peace soon!

just relax. go to bed as early as possible. put other responsibilities aside. put a matress or blankets on the floor of your room and let him sleep there. this is just a temporary sleep disturbance, and how you deal with it determines how he meets the next challenge of life. have patience with him, its not his fault, hes not doing it to upset you or make you tired. dont ever think of your child in a resentful way; its not healthy. EVERY mom goes through things like this periodically in life.

make sure hes getting enough exersize/outdoor play. this will help a LOT. my son sleeps much better when he has gotten outside to play.

anyway, just have patience. in a moment you wont remember this, and will be dealing with the next issue in life. :P good luck!

I would have him examined by his pediatrician first. Maybe even get a referral to a specialist. This sounds extreme and unhealthy for both of you. You probably don't have a lot of time (or energy) to read, but I highly recommend Mary Sheedy Kurcinka's book, "Sleepless in America," and her website. She helped me with my boys and their sleep issues. Was there a change in his life in August? Any stress in his life? Does he get any caffeine? How much screen time does he have? All of those can be factors in sleep. Good luck.

Let him sleep on your floor on a camping mattress or something. My daughter went thru a phase around 3 1/2 where she was "afraid" to sleep due to some pretty bad nightmares. I gave her the option of sleeping on my floor (didn't want her in my bed cause I knew she would never leave) and she slept fine... and I did in turn.

What happens when he wakes up? It's hard to really answer this question without more details, but if he's waking up and then getting to watch TV, hang out with you, sleep in your bed, go downstairs, or anything of that nature, I would put a stop to that ASAP. My general rule is that my 3 y/o goes to bed about 8 and does not get to leave her room until 7 the next morning, except of course if she has to potty or is sick, but that's rare. If she gets up in the middle of the night I put her back in her room. There is no snuggling in my room or sleeping with us, etc. She is allowed to 'play' in her room if she's "not tired" but there aren't too many toys in there plus I make her keep the light out so if there's no natural light she doesn't have much to work with! ;) It's really hard and it took many, many months for us to get that routine after she moved to her big girl bed at 22 months, but now it's pretty golden. There are some days but honestly, nothing is as bad, or even close to it, as those first few months. There were nights I had to put her back in her room upwards of 50-75 times. You can't control if they sleep or not but you can control if they stay in their room and don't bother you. Obviously it's easier said than done and you're probably going to be awake if they're awake, but I think if you stick to it you'll see less drama! Hope this helps or at least touches on your issue!

What does his MD say?

In addition to looking into possible illness and emotional issues as suggested already, do whatever you can to be sure your little guy is getting LOTS of physical exercise during the day. If you can convince his daycare provider to give him an hour or more outside, soaking up natural daylight, all the better. Just bundle him up well to protect from weather. This is not only relaxing to mind and muscle, but if he's restless because of toxins, it can help his body break them down.

Also, avoid TV or computer time within two hours of bed. Most of the light emitted from electronic screens is in the blue end of the spectrum, and this negatively affects the brain's production of melatonin, which helps induce normal sleep at night.

Finally, look at detoxifying his diet and environment. Try clearing his diet and sleeping area of all possible scented products,cleaners or other toxic chemicals, which can have a terrible impact on sleep and relaxation. Get a free and clear detergent and avoid fabric softeners entirely. You can add up to a cup of baking soda to the wash for extra cleaning, and a cup of white vinegar to the rinse cycle to soften his bedding and remove detergent residues (the pickle smell goes away by the time it's dry).

In his diet, avoid not only sugar, but all sources of caffeine (tea or many soft drinks), artificial colors and preservatives, all of which are proven to hype-up kids who are susceptible.

I have known children and adults (myself included) who have gotten much improved sleep with homeopathy, acupuncture, and even chiropractic adjustment.

Good luck. I hope you find answers that make a positive difference, quick.