Help Getting My Daughter to Eat Healthy Nutritious Foods!

Updated on February 02, 2008
A.B. asks from Matthews, NC
18 answers

My daughter, who is almost 21 months old, is a terrible eater and I need help! She use to be a great eater when she was younger and we fed her baby jarred food. We slowly introduced table foods as she got older, but I was very hesitant to introduce foods heavy in spices. Now I can't get her to eat anything except the following: yogurt, cheese, noodles, eggs, bread, waffles, pancakes, milk, watered down juice, (not that often though), water, crackers, Cheerios, raisins, cookies, pretzels, anything sweet, and she absolutely LOVES fruit (thank goodness!). I still give her the baby oatmeal cereal a few times a week mixed with a jar of baby fruit. This way I know she is getting the iron and vitamins that are in the cereal. We've slowly lost interest in anything green, she picks it out. I try to puree vegetables and secretly hide them in different foods - butternut squash in her grilled cheese and butternut squash in her macaroni and cheese (same color). I have the new Jessica Seinfield book and I've tried several recipes and she seems to like some, not all. She won't eat chicken or any beef, but she'll eat a hotdog! HELP! Does anybody have any suggestions on different foods I can fix or if this is just a phase and she'll start to eat better. I'm worried she is not getting the nutrients that she needs and it so hard to try to figure out what I can feed her nightly and feed my husband and I too. I want her to eat the same food as we do, but she's just so darn picky!! Help!

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So What Happened?

THANK YOU, THANK YOU! You all have given me some great advice and suggestions. I'm slowly trying to email you all back and thank you personally with your suggestions. Lots of what you all suggested, I've tried, but that doesn't mean that I won't keep trying those same tactics! I do hope that with time my daughter will begin to come around and enjoy eating her vegetables and meat. My son, who just turned 6 months on Saturday was introduced to his first food, rice cereal!! So hopefully, since I'm going to start making his food, that she will see what I'm giving him and want some of it too. Who knows!! Thank you again for all your advice and suggestions.

A.

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J.W.

answers from Raleigh on

Will she eat sauce on her pasta? If you chop up broccoli or other veggies they hide will in red sauce....

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R.S.

answers from Raleigh on

I started sneaking things into my dd's rice--starting with mozzarella cheese cut into pieces as big as grains of rice! I just kept sticking in a little bit of new thigns into the things she loved (rice, pasta, eggs--that was pretty much it!) and she slowly began to accept other things. I was so thrilled when she loved to eat rice mixed with broccoli flowerettes and shredded parmesan! I then started adding little bits of shredded chicken, and now she'll eat chicken too! Same with gr. beef. Just start with little tiny bits and don't give up! :)

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S.R.

answers from Jacksonville on

I have been in the same boat for 5 years. Clara never ate well. Until she was five and could understand fully give and take and consequences, I struggled. I finally refused to buy bologna and Hot dogs and would make her try something else or get nothing. At that age they will not starve. They will adapt. Brigid is 3 and is having the same issue. She ate well as a baby but not now. When I talked to my ped. He agreed that at age 5 it was no more Mr. Nice guy. I supplemented with babyfood jars of veggies until then. Now Clara will eat lamb, some beef. Brigid will eat breaded chicken and we are working on the rest. Soup with small bits of veggies and meat is a good way to sneak some in their diet. Clara will also eat arugala, spinach, and broccoli. She likes the salad spritzer, so as long as she can spray that on her spinach and arugala she will eat it. As long as she can dip her lamb chop in mint jelly she will gobble up two or three of them. I let her make ratatoullie with me. She loves the movie. It has 4 kinds of veggies in it so imagine my surprise when she ate it.Tofu cubes in the Minute Miso at the commissary is a good meat substitute if you can get her to eat it. Or a little soy on the cubes. Butternut squash or zucchini cupcakes with frosting are a good dessert alternative. Sneaking in all the veggies is not approved by all. There are varying opionions on the deceptively delicious approach. Sneak them in and also continue to give them to them whole and encourage them to eat them. If she likes juice, try V8 too. That is my two cents. I am in the same boat.Word to the wise. These diet issues have caused constipation for years in the 5 year old, which helped contribute to urinary tract infections. Getting backed up and not quite going introduces e.coli to the whole area. Her Urologist said MAKE HER EAT HER VEGGIES. Fruit too but definitely must eat veggies. That little talk seemed to push her along since she didn't like being sick. Good luck.If you stay diligent with introducing and pushing healthy food, she will start to outgrow it.

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M.B.

answers from Charlotte on

my 16 month old son it the same way. he will usually eat sweet potato but nothing else. sometimes he will eat a little bit of banana but usually not. he used to love fruits and veggies and would eat anything. but now it is a challenge to find things for him to eat. i am going to use this advice as well. good luck!

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H.H.

answers from Jacksonville on

I don't know how much help I can be, but I can offer a couple things to try. I'm sure the Seinfeld book has lots of suggestions. My DS is only 15 months, but very similiar. Loves fruit, dairy and grains. Not a big veggie or meat eater, but he does still enjoy the orange veggies like squash & sweet potato. As for the green stuff. I make zucchini bread which is pretty much like dessert. He likes that for breakfast or I get spinach bagels from the bagel place in Hampstead(can't remember the exact name). Pancakes with yellow summer squash are pretty well liked. Have you tried the yobaby cereal and yogurt(it has some iron in it)? Sometimes, he'll eat green beans with cheese on them. He likes raw carrots, but only has seven teeth so I chop them with an apple and he loves that. Will she eat beans to get some protein? Mine won't, but he has started to eat a little chicken. Anyway, I completely understand and feel like I'll never be able to serve him the same meal DH and I eat. Just thought of another one. I make a really healthy muffin using Cracklin Oat Bran cereal with carrots and pineapple(or you could use apple or peaches). Let me know if you would like the recipe.

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M.Z.

answers from Charlotte on

Don't worry so much -- try reading http://www.amazon.com/Child-Mine-Feeding-Love-Sense/dp/09...

my friend, who is a psychologist and worked for many years with preschool children recommended it to me- I checked it out at at the library. I have a son who is fearless and will eat anything put in front of him and a daughter who is so picky it's ridicuolous. My daughter is 2.5 and I was really starting to worry, but she finally started to try meat and other things just this week-- the book is a great resource about the "power struggled" with food. Just put some on her plate and eat it yourself on your plate--eventually, she will want some.....

Mel

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S.F.

answers from Charlotte on

I'm watching your post, and I'm curious about the responses! I also have a picky eater, who's 2 this week! I juice him... I buy these two juice brands: http://www.kagome.us/ and http://www.bolthouse.com/juice_main.html - my son particularly likes Orange Carrot Blossome (Kagome), and Passion Fruit Apple Carrot (Bolthouse). They're organic, and cost a little more then the regular juice brands, however, Kagome offers 8 veggies and 4 fruits in one bottle!! That's 2 servings in one 8oz cup. So if I offer this as his juice, then he gets veggies too! They do not have alot of pulpy taste, so they work in sippy cups well. Food Lion, Lowes Foods, Harris Teeter - I've found them all there. They're refrigerated (and usually near either soy products, or the produce department). I do 1/2 water, 1/2 juice.

Another thing that my son loves are the veggie fritters from this page: http://www.wholesometoddlerfood.com/weeklytoddlerrecipes_... - his favorites are Carrot/Zuchinni fritters, although I modified it, I use grated potato with it, and opt out of the cayenne and spring onions - we also do not do the bbq sauce, he likes them plain. He LOVES those! The pumpkin pancake recipe (on the same page) is a big hit with everyone in my house, they're hearty - and include pumpkin!! I make a double batch and freeze them, so I can pop them in the microwave for quick breakfast - the Hodgson Mill box also gives fruit pancake recipes that are super easy to follow. It's a little healthier then regular pancakes, because they're whole mill wheat. One last idea - I buy whole wheat English Muffins, plain pizza sauce (ragu) and I'll lightly toast the english muffin sliced in half - put 1 tsp of sauce, add grated carrot, zuchinni, then top w/ fav. shredded cheese, then I pop it the oven on broil to melt the cheese, then cut up. He also loves this.

Like I mentioned, I'm in the same boat - so I have also purchased the Sneaky Chef book... some are a hit, some are not. I will watch your post, because I'm up for new ideas - I feel like I repeat the same foods 4 times over every week!!

good luck!!

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A.C.

answers from Charlotte on

This is definitely a phase and for now, you're doing the right things. Don't worry, children don't need as much variety as you might think. So as long as she's eating some healthy foods I wouldn't worry. For now. My daughter ate great before the age of 2. From 2 to 4 she was so incredibly picky it drove me crazy. It was a control issue. At 4, however, we put an end to it We made a food chart and had her put everything she ate on a list (we wrote, she drew pictures). This motivated her to try new foods, so she could add them to the chart. She now eats tons of fruits, veggies and meat. She still doesn't really want to eat fish, so that's my latest challenge. Anyway, she may be too young for the food chart but try it when she's a little older and for now, try to not let it drive you crazy. Remember, the more it pushes your buttons, the more "fun" it is for her!

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A.W.

answers from Charlotte on

If I didn't know better, I'd think out daughters were twins, seperated at birth. They eat exactly the same things, except my daughter loves sweet pot's too. I can tell you, as she gets a little older (she's almost 3 1/2) she is getting better. She actually ate 3 chicken nuggets last night and I was thrilled.....she also won't eat meat except for a hot dog. I just keep trying and it's a struggle, but I do cook her different dinner. I know alot of people say don't, but I want her to eat something!! I just continue to put "our" food on her plate and hope she'll try it eventually. My big thing now is I DON'T let her snack between meals, so she will eat the healthy choices given to her. If she's hungry, she'll eat her meals! This has helped a little. I also give her a children's vitamin daily. I don't have the answers, but I say, no snacking and keep trying. I hope it works for both our sakes! Good Luck!

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M.M.

answers from Wilmington on

Keep trying. I have two teenagers and a 4 year old and they all went through this. I know with my daughter, her biggest problem was she couldn't sit still to eat. To get her to eat dinner with the family we would let her walk around the table, take a bite, walk around the table again. It was the only way. She was more likely to try stuff if we didn't make her sit down still to eat. I don't know if that has anything to do with your issues or if she is just that picky. My youngest won't eat anything that is combined, like chicken and rice for example. It has to be seperated then he will eat it. He is more likely to eat chicken and beef if it has some good old ketchup on it. Maybe that is something that would intice your daughter into trying it....Don't get discouraged, of course you want her to have all her food groups, but I think fact is for more children than not, they just won't eat what we want them to. As long as she is gaining and maintaining a healthy weight, relax. Keep up the good work with the infant cereal, that is a great idea for now. My son went two years without eating any vegetable but carrots. Now he will eat those and scoff down green peas like I have never seen anyone eat them before!
Oh and if you decide to try the pediasure stuff, go easy on the first run. I bought a bunch on sale like a goof, and little man didn't like ANY of it, not one drink or one snack! So that all went in the garbage...Also tried Nutripals and had the same brick wall there....Best of luck to you, keep offering and one of these days she will surprise you by cleaning her plate! That is worth the wait!

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K.S.

answers from Huntington on

I should stay out of this, the first thing I see is that you now have a baby getting the baby food and bottle which she views as different and special treatment. Second I think you have already lost the battle because God gave you this child to raise and not for the child to raise you.

When you want a child to eat what you eat set a practice of eating meals at a table together. What is on the table is what is served that day, if you don't want it there is nothing else for you to eat. Serve the proper food for the nutrition need for all at the table. Do NOT cave in and get them something because you feel sorry for them, and don't take them out to dinner if they haven't been eating at your table. Don't yell at them for not eating and keep their portions proper size they can always have seconds after eating a balance meal. Meal time should be pleasent, leave the shop talk for after their bed time. Things that the family can do together, what have you learned today,etc. My father alway said if you didn't learn something new each day you should go down and buy the pine box. Make this time very special and eat slow don't rush to see a game or show in fact the TV should not be on during dinner time. If you don't get hold of this now she will rule you and it won't be any fun and cause family problems.

When you think she is old enough let her help pick the family meals, start with maybe pizza night let her help you make the pizza from scrach, so its healthy. At this age she can help you carry cold things to table, bread, butter, salt and pepper, plates, napkins, if dropped don't yell help her help her pick them up and try again, she can clear her place or help with the whole table, just make it fun for her to be there. Kay S

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M.L.

answers from Parkersburg on

You could try tofu: cut firm tofu into cubes she can pick up, marinate it for a few minutes in something you'll think she'll like, then pan fry in a little oil till light brown. Tofu is totally neutral in flavor by itself so it will absorb whatever flavors you cook it with. A little soy sauce, maybe a little ginger or even onion/garlic salt, or broth if she's not up to these stronger flavors. The cooked cubes can be eaten warm or cold and have a decent amount of protein and other nutrients.

I, too, am aiming for my daughter (14 months) to eat more or less what we eat: I refuse to feed her chicken tenders and french fries all the time because it's a pain to cook separate meals, encourages pickiness, and isn't healthy. However, I think kids survive these picky phases just fine. Our daughter sees us eating a mostly healthy and varied diet, so we won't be trying to get her to eat her veggies while we stuff twinkies in our mouths!:-) Most Americans have more vitamins in their urine than much of the world gets in their diets.

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M.M.

answers from Raleigh on

Before I had My own baby 3months ago I was a nanny for 6 years. It takes time for kids to get used to the texture of meat first you should try some ground turkey or beef and mixed it with her favorite food like turkey in with the mac and cheese mix. You may even have to grind the turkey a little more after it is cooked, in a food processor. Also eat with her food at that age is not only a nutrition thing it is social too. she is more likely to eat it if she sees you eat it too. and hot dogs are not a good idea the nitrates are not only bad for her but they work a lot like MSG it is no wonder she only wants to eat that type of meat it is so tasty the other meats don't have a chance.

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R.R.

answers from Raleigh on

You should just give her time and a vitamin (so you're sure she gets any nutrients she may be missing).

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A.A.

answers from Charlotte on

Hi A.,
I am in the same boat, however, you're in a yacht compared to my paddle boat. LOL My son is 4 years old and ever since he was about 12 or 13 months he stopped eating table food. I did the same thing...slowly tried to ween him off of jarred foods and for a while it was going good. Then suddenly he refused everything except for the following: raisins, oatmeal, apple sauce (for a side dish) and chicken nuggets. He will eat anyting sweet and of course any snack or junk food. But when it came to meal time, he wouldn't eat anything except for what I listed. Eventually, he did away with oatmeal and we were left with just the apple sauce and nuggets. He recently added grilled cheese to his repitoire. Everyone told me, "oh, he'll grow out of it...he won't starve himself...he'll eat when he's ready..." Not true at all. I slowly began to see that it was more than being picky. He really was developing a food aversion...had issues with textures and food being on my daughter's mouth, etc. Recently, I began taking him to an O.T. (occupational therapist). Someone mentioned to me that my son may have a sensory disorder. I began looking it up online and he definitely had some of the traits. He's been seeing an O.T. for about three weeks now. She got him to eat dried banana chips on the first day. She's using a technique called food chaining which is where you start with a familiar food and then introduce something new that is similar in texture and color. For instance, she started with a cheese cracker, moved to a corn stick (frito type) and then to a piece of raw squash cut in the same shape as the stick. The goal is to get him eating 4-5 new foods in six months. Your daughter sounds like she will eat a variety of foods which is great. Sounds like the only thing missing in her diet is protein...peanut butter or nuts if she's not allergic. Sunbutter is a good alternative. Watered down juice is excellent because regular juice is too sweet anyway so that's actually the preferred choice if you ask a nutritionist. I also buy Mott's for tots which is a juice box with a lot of water added. My daughter, who is 21 months and eats great, loves them too so I also bought a juice box container to prevent her from squeezing the juice box everywhere. I puree vegetables and stick them in his apple sauce. I bought Jessica's book too and laughed because i've been pureeing veggies for a few years now, but the only food i could hide them in that he would eat is apple sauce. It's been suggested to me that you should continue to put the foods that your family eats on her plate along with something familiar that she will eat. This stresses the importance of eating veggies and such. My doctor said to make it a no pressure situation. Try an incentive...if she eats one small nibble...she gets... Then the next night if she eats one small bite she gets... some would say it's bribery and you shouldn't; my doctor said whatever works. The OT frowns on giving incentives for food or dessert as a reward for eating. They say all food is food...there's no good food or bad food. Personally, I would say try your best right now while she's still very young. I would put one vegetable on her plate at every meal where possible. Start with corn or something. Do that for a week...encouraging her all the while. Choose another vegetable the next week. My son's issue is sensory and behavioral now. He's been doing it so long it's not going to be easy to change. I don't know what I could've done differently. I tried everything...incentives, punishment, spanking, peer pressure...nothing worked. Of course, I didn't see this coming...maybe I would've tried even harder if I had known that we would be in this situation at 4 and a half. I hope this helped...good luck!!

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A.S.

answers from Raleigh on

Hi A.,
After having gone through this with both children, who are now 7 and 5...I was certainly ready to pull my hair out with their eating. For the longest time, the only thing my kids would eat were noodles and chicken nuggets. It was super frustrating cooking two things for dinner. I wanted my kids to eat and didn't want food to become an issue. They soon grew out of the 'phase' and now do quite well with eating.
It sounds like your daughter eats very well for a toddler. Maybe for dinner, you can give her a little of what you cook for you and your husband on her plate and also some of the food she likes, so you know she'll at least eat...and be getting introduced to new foods that she can try on her own. One thing to think about is that the food she does like to eat has lots of nutrients in it. Know what you mean about the hot dogs...they were the only type of 'meat' my daughter would eat. I began getting the Hebrew National ones...at least those weren't as bad as Oscar Meyer or other brands. I also made sure I got the name brand cereal and organic yogurt and milk. You will survive this :):)

One thing that really helped my kids was vitamins...or maybe it helped ease my conscience that they weren't eating vegetables when they were little :). I got them from the health food store and the kids are no worse for the wear. They are both healthy and fine :)...your little girl will be too!! :).

On a side note :),your daughter's little life got turned around, when your little guy was born. You may just want to not choose this battle to save you and your daughter some tears and frustration :)

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R.W.

answers from Raleigh on

A.,
I have a seventeen-month-old girl and know exactly what you mean! I do have a couple of ideas to share with you.

I cook a batch of rice and grains once or twice a week. I have found that i can add quite a few healthy extras and she still loves it (I think it is pretty good myself). The base of it is 1 1/2 cups of brown rice (I use short and long-grain) and barley and 3 cups of lightly salted water. Bring the water to a boil, cover it and simmer for 45 minutes. When the rice is done cooking, add two palm fulls of each of the following: wheat germ, brewer's yeast, ground flax seed. Also add a little bit of Extra Virgin Olive Oil and a palm full of parmesean cheese. Just mix it all together and serve. Once your baby gets used to this try adding a bag of steamed, pureed spinach (I use the frozen organic). My 4-1/2-year-old calls it "Magic Green Rice." Both of my girls love it!

One more idea is to use Barilla Plus pasta instead of regular. It has a lot of nutrients in it that you can't get from regular pasta. I toss it with Extra Virgin Olive Oil, Parmesean Cheese and ground flax seed for my kids. They love it and I feel good about serving it to them.

Mix steamed broccoli into whole grain macoroni and cheese. Make sure the broccoli breaks up into little pieces and it really tastes good with it.

Also, have you tried giving her beans? They are great for you, easy to prepare (rinse them well so they won't cause gas) and a lot of kids love them.

I hope these ideas ideas were helpful!

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J.P.

answers from Raleigh on

First, check with your pediatrician to be sure there are no health concerns. Be sure you are giving children's vitamins regularly, as recommended by your pediatrician.

Children's tongues (and their taste buds) are very sensitive to the sweet - sour - salty - bitter tastes. The average person has about 10,000 taste buds and they're replaced every 2 weeks or so. But as a person ages, some of those taste cells don't get replaced. An older person may only have 5,000 working taste buds. That's why certain foods may taste stronger to children than they do to adults.

Relax. Keep offering healthy choices. Let her see you eating healthy foods. Toddlers are often picky eaters. Keep the basics in mind ... think in terms of carbs (bread, cereal), protein (cheese ... the chicken or other meats will come), dairy, veggies, fruit, and keep her hydrated with tap water (bottled water does not have flouride). Look into pediasure, a complete balanced nutritional supplement for children. Let your daughter know that what she doesn't like today, she may like tomorrow, because she is growing and changing everyday. Encourage her to TRY something new, but don't insist on it. The more you push, the less successful you'll be. Be matter-of-fact about the kinds of snacks you allow between meals, and nothing at least an hour before a main meal. But she is still very young. Some of these things won't come into play for awhile yet. If you are worried that she is not eating enough, don't make the mistake of feeding her ANYTHING (like junk food), just to have her eat something. Be very careful about the sugar in cereals and other foods you offer. Sugar is so bad for our bodies, and it will wreak havoc on her behavior. I personally think sugar is responsible for the epidemic hyperactivity so many children are diagnosed with. It's great that you've tried some of the Jessica Seinfeld tricks. Keep up that kind of thinking.

Again -- relax. If she senses tension about food, that can start a whole bunch of other problems. And remember, children go through growth spurts and sometimes will want to eat all the time, and then other times won't be interested. Unless she is seriously underweight or pale or has other signs of concern, take a deep breath ... it will be fine.

(I'm a mother of 2 and grandma of 5.)

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