Help from Moms with ADD Teenagers

Updated on April 12, 2008
A.S. asks from Newport News, VA
18 answers

My 16 year old son has ADD. He was taking medicine for this, but now his father doesn't want him to take it anymore. I am trying other things, but I need some suggestions.

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J.S.

answers from Washington DC on

Eliminating milk has helped my son tremendously. I can always tell when he has gotten something with dairy in it.

1 mom found this helpful

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L.H.

answers from Dover on

years ago a friend of mine discovered that her daughter had ADD. At first i really wasn't for all these kids being put on drugs--thats how i saw it.

To have Sissy diagnosed, they went to AI DuPont, Wilmington, DE. its a hospital that specializes in diagnosing and treating children...one of the leading in the country.

well they took Sissy up there, ran her through tests and found out (as they have in many children) that her ADD came from her g.father being exposed to agent orange in Vietnam/gulf War. it seems to skip a generation and then goes to the g.children. their body chemicals are changed and they need these type of 'nutirients' to take because they are lacking them and their body does not make it.

Sissy went from almost being kicked out of school for the way she was acting (age 11) and almost being put in the 'retarded group' to an honor roll student. she is now 17, has a job after school, drives a vehicle and is one of the most incredible people you could ever meet. she isn't 'high' on these things--she is normal. she also found she has an incredible singing voice and is shortly going to be put on TV as the church she attends is on TV on Sun. mornings.

I understand where your husband is coming from, but give him this letter. If i hadn't seen it with my own eyes, i would have never believed it. make sure your son is diagnosed properly for he is at a point in school where it will either make him or break him for college if his body chemicals are not aligned up properly so he can get passing grades. It would be a very big mistake to screw him up now and he pay for it the rest of his life with low self esteem, etc.

There are also ADD and ADHD adults. it really is a sympton that something is wrong that needs to be corrected. all of this has come a long way from whence it all began.

God bless you,
Pastor L.

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A.P.

answers from Norfolk on

I'm wondering what your son thinks? Does the medicine help, are his grades satisfactory, does he feel more focused on the medication, does he have any complaints about being on the medicine? Those question stated; I have a 15 year old who did very well on adderall. He decided he didn't like how it "changed his personality" so he stopped taking it. His grades dropped dramatically and his behavior became pretty inconsistently disrespectful. He had decided trying some other illegal substances was more enjoyable than daily life, school success. Adderall interfered with his other choices.
I don't encourage any parents to put their children on add
meds, however, when these medications work for a child the difference in their life is evident. Wonder why dad has changed his mind?
The only suggestions I know of are to limit caffine, have a very structured daily schedule and pray. No real science to
prove this; but I have read a tremendous amount about add - adhd and tried to guide my son back on track.
Good Luck, going it alone is always challenging. Don't forget to take time for yourself each day.

A.

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J.R.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi A.!
I believe that if you check out http://www.feingold.org website you will find much help to your problem. For instance, I was surprised to learn that many foods we eat - those with artificial colors, sugars, etc. - are made from petrolium!!
And we wonder why kids are so cranked up and can't concentrate!!!
Let us know what you think after you've checked it out!

-

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N.B.

answers from Washington DC on

I would check into the Feingold Diet. Just google FEINGOLD DIET and you will get tons of information. There is also a yahoo group you can join and interact with others who are on the diet. Since your son is 16 he may be resistant to totally changing his diet. HOwever the diet will work! It is based on removing additives and preservatives from the diet.

-Nicole

D.S.

answers from Allentown on

Hi A.,

I just returned from a seminar on "Executive Dysfunction & How to Help the Disorganized Child." The presenter was
Dr. Laurie Dietzel. e-mail her with your concerns.

____@____.com See if she can help you.

Good Luck. D.

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K.R.

answers from Richmond on

HI A.~

I feel your pain. My daughter is 15 with ADD and takes meds and still is having a hard time. She was on and off the medication for several years and had been doing fairly well without it for the last two years and then this year - POW! My sister's daughter also exploded with ADD at about the same age. The hormones are going crazy and there is SO SO much more stimulation in high school (socially, as well as the academics get harder). We put her back on her meds, and it does help, but still have to maintain a RIGID routine in order for her to keep functioning.

First ~ have a meeting with the guidance counselor and all his teachers.(the guidance counselor can set up one meeting with all of the teachers at one time). His teachers may not even be aware of his ADD and they can help him if they know. There are alot of ADD kids out there and the teachers can give you lots of great tips on keeping your son organized and focused.

Second ~ your son's father should not be the determining factor on the meds. There needs to be a consensus between your son, you, dad and the doctor. It takes ALOT of follow-through when a child has ADD. Is Dad ready to work HARD? If not, well, then he shouldn't have much say in it, now should he? How does your son feel? What does the doctor say? Yes, you can go the no med route if that's what everyone feels is best. Your son is the one who has to live with this and he should be the MAJOR determining factor in the decisions about his own body.

The MAIN thing is - do not give up! These children are so prone to developing depression because they start to lose their self esteem. They may be trying their best, but just don't have the tools to deal with this handicap. LOVE YOUR BOY unconditionally and ENCOURAGE HIM as much as you possibly can. I know it can get very frustrating at times and you just want to scream at your child - but try to control you outbursts at him. Try your best to keep it together for him. You will end up trying one thing after another until FINALLY, it will click! What works for one may not work for another, so like I said, it takes work and dedication - along with patience and understanding. I wish you the very best and do not give up on your child! ~K.

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E.D.

answers from Richmond on

A.,

My husband is ADD/HD and using a gluten free diet worked for him. I will warn you though, it is VERY expensive. Good Luck.

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P.P.

answers from Washington DC on

Let the kid take his medicine!!!
It's not his father's decision, your son is 16 and if the meds help him in school, etc. he is old enough to understand and weigh in on the decision. My husband is ADD and still takes meds before work. He calls them his smart pills. You don't outgrow ADD.
I also knew a boy who didn't get on meds until he was 15. He was amazed at the difference they made. He used to get into trouble all the time. Once on the meds he was much happier and stopped most of his disruptive behaviors.
Those of us without ADD can't understand what they are dealing with.

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S.F.

answers from Washington DC on

I am sorry that I am not knowledgeable about treating ADD, and I do not have suggestions.

I did want to suggest that you should be careful if you have any leftover ADD medication lying around. I am guardian ad litem to many children in the court system who have begun abusing drugs by abusing prescription drugs for ADD. Children have learned that if they save up their daily pills and take too many at once, they get a "spin". This is, I'm afraid, a very common practice. It's the new gateway drug.

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L.H.

answers from Norfolk on

Dear A.,
My 9 year old grandson was diagnosed with ADD. His mom and dad decided, after much prayer and doctor consultations, NOT to put him on medications but to go the natural nutritional supplements first. He is doing much better. He takes Shaklee Vita-Lea and Omega Guard (double the recommended dosage). The Shaklee Omega Guard is made from 100% pure fish oil. All of the products are 100% guaranteed. You can check this out at http://www.shaklee.net/lolahilton. Also, maybe you could cut back on his current meds while trying alternatives to see how he does. Just keep encouraging him and letting him know how much you love him as does Jesus.
God Bless, L. H

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P.V.

answers from Cumberland on

My son went to a different doctor for his med check and we asked if changing his therapist would help. (He has OCD and ADD) He told us the only way for that to work is if he wants to be different. My son doesn't see anything wrong with the way he is. He doesn't feel like he has a problem. I am in complete agreement about the meds. He has been on all different kinds of meds since he was 5. He is now 17. I don't know would like to know some alternatives also. I would be a little afraid of everything because of his mind set.

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T.T.

answers from Dover on

Did you know that toxins in your house that come from everyday cleaning products and other house hold products can contribute to ADD and ADHD. please visit www.cheerforyourfuture.com if I can of anymore help.

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A.K.

answers from Washington DC on

A.,
You also might want to use CHADD as a resource. This is the national non-profit organization for Children and Adults with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder. There's a chapter here in Northern Virginia that I coordinate. Along with parent suport groups, presentations, and a resource library, we also have monthly meetings. Their website is www.chadd.org

Good luck to you!

A. Dolin, M.Ed.
www.ectutoring.com
www.anndolin.com

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M.A.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi A.!
My son is ADD (now 19). We tried a lot of meds - they either made him sick or he was a zombie. Check with the school, there should be a team to help you. Usually it's the counselor, Phychologist, & some of the teachers. There's a lot of different things you can do to keep your child on task (also depends on the severity of the problem). Sometimes it's just remind, remind, remind (or nag, nag, nag). My son graduated in the 98 percentile, but hates school, so college was not an option. What we or I should say he decided was to join a union where they give you a job but in return you have to go to school for 5 years (2 nights a week 6-9 & every some many Saturdays). He makes 16.09 hr. & in 250 hrs. will have full health benefits. He belongs to the Plumbers & Steamfitters Union Local 486 in Rosedale. Have to have a diploma or GED & you have to pass their test (alot of math). But then you're in. My husband did the same thing (only he was a lot older).
Basically what I'm getting at is for us it was finding a nitch for my son - interest is a major thing. Without interest comes boredom, & problems. What's the saying? "Patience is a virtue"
E-mail me if I can help in any way.
Good luck.

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S.S.

answers from Richmond on

Hello A.. Has your son had some of the usual negative side effects of ADD medication? Do you take him off of the medication in the summer? I am a therapist who specializes in using psychoaccoustically engineered music to treat children with attention, sensory processing and learning differences. The various forms of sound therapy can be very effective at promoting focus and attention. Check out these web sites: www.thelisteningprogram.com, www.vitallinks.net, www.reiinstitute.com. My web site is www.insynctherapy.org. You may call me to discuss whether or not your child might be a good candidate for one of these forms of sound therapy.

S. Starseed, MHS, LOT
President, In-Sync Therapy

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S.A.

answers from Washington DC on

My 20 year old cousin has ADD and has been on medication for some time.

I have started to learn more about natural remedies. Every case is individual, but there are somethings that you can do with diet and nutrition that can help. I believe Americans are overmedicated and under educated when it comes to many health related issues.

I would do some research and possibly consult a nutritionist and a Naturopath for alternatives.

There is some good information on www.naturalnews.com
Here is one article:
http://www.naturalnews.com/021978.html

Be Well and Take Care.

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