25 answers

Grandma Opening Savings Account for Grandkid?

My SD's grandma wants to open a saving's account for her. I know she's trying to be helpful.

I've been after my husband to do this for his daughter for a long time. I think she should be putting some of her money in her saving's account because it's a good lesson in money for her, and then she'll be saving money toward college or trade school.

If the grandma does it, it will be at her bank (which is not OUR bank) and she will be the adult trustee. All deposits will have to go through her.

I think it's my SD's mother or father's job to do this at their own bank. I think in this case it's my husband's job since SD lives with us and if she deposits money regularly in the account it will be easier if it's at our bank and he is the trustee. Plus, although I would never say this out loud, it's not any of Grandma's business how much money SD is putting in, or how much money she is taking out. AND I don't want her to be in charge of SD's money when the time comes for her to spend it. I think that's her mother and father's business.

Plus, I still feel like it will be a pain for us to have to wait unti SD comes to visit to deposit any money. The plan I was shooting for (and hoping to get my husband on board for) is every time SD gets a lot of cash, a small portion would go to savings. Recently we've had a lot of issues with my SD not appreciating things or shopping problems with money. She went to the American Girl store with $175 and was being a brat. So I think if she gets $175, some of it should go to savings to help teach her about money and saving. She is 10.

Is this weird for a grandma to open an account? What should I say or have my husband say/do? My husband is moving so S-L-O-W on this. I think that Grandma will open an account soon, and then it will be too late. I can't say anything, it's not my place.

And if Grandma opens an account (and my husband has a thing about not hurting his mom's feelings or speaking up) then is it a bad idea to ALSO open up a different savings account at our bank under my husband's name so it's easier to make deposits?

Advice welcome!

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

Thanks! I was only concerned because of the way Grandma brought it up to us, as if this account was to be THE savings account that her granddaughter could use. And also because she is sometimes a controlling grandma. She used to demand that my husband give up his weekend with his daughter so she could spend the weekend at grandma's (my husband finally got up the guts to tell her to stop!)

We'll let grandma do her thing. She talked to SD about the account and about how SD was going to save her money in it. Grandma's bank is a small one, 45 minutes away from us. And now that SD has a LIFE and is spending her time with her mom or dad like she should plus friends, getting out there is a pain.

And I'll talk to my husband about opening a different savings account at our bank where my SD can deposit her money regularly. I think grandma will be upset that it isn't THE account we are using, but I hope she'll see that it's okay for SD to have multiple accounts.

Featured Answers

There are so many things that just don't make any sense.

You don't state why grandma wants to open an account. Is it because hubby won't get off his but and do it, or because grandma wants to deposit money for her grandchild and help teach her grandchild important financial lessons.

You say SD lives with you, but then you say you don't want to wait until SD visits.

Where does a 10 year old get all this money that she will need to constantly be going to the bank?

A large percentage of grandparents open accounts for their grandchildren. I would NOT be concerned at all about grandma opening an account. I don't understand why you wouldn't want grandma to open an account. My FIL opened accounts for my children. Rather than being concerned, I'm extremely grateful for the fact that it'll help pay for college.

A person can have many bank accounts, so there's no reason that hubby can't open an account for her.

4 moms found this helpful

I have more than one account, don't most people? My son has more than one account and he's ony 4....

I have an account for my son at my bank and my Dad has another one for him at his credit union. I guess I don't understand what the big deal is? I LOVE that Dad opened an account for him. Where I might be tempted to dip into the account I opened for him for something fun or short term, I KNOW that my Dad has much more control and the money he puts away will always be there....

3 moms found this helpful

Well, my mom and dad have accounts in all the kids' names and so do my inlaws. My parents have education accounts, his parents have investment accounts. My grandmother bought stock for my oldest son when he was born, her first Great Grandchild.
Plus we have education accounts and the kids each have their own savings accounts.
Let Grandma do it. Have her put you on the account so you can manage it too.
I think you're stressing too much about this.

3 moms found this helpful

More Answers

I guess I don't understand why you feel there should be ONLY one account.

Let Grandma open an account for her. In California, many people do that, for instance, under the Uniform Gift to Minor Act. Many people set up these types of accounts and have "control" over them for the benefit of the beneficiary. The child.
If Grandma wants to regularly deposit money into that account to be transferred to your daughter when she comes of age to be used for college or whatever, I don't see the problem.

If you and your husband want to set up a savings account for her, just do it. I don't see why it has to be an either/or situation unless you feel that any money her grandmother gives her should go into the savings account you control.

It's been many years since I worked for a stock brokerage firm, but I can tell you that many people set up accounts for kids and grandkids in which they can deposity not only money, but stocks, etc. There used to be tax and investment advantages and that's why many wealthy people were doing it.

Just have two separate accounts. For the life of me, I'm not sure why you would consider telling the Grandmother she can't open an account for her granddaughter. Lots of grandparents do it.

It will NEVER be too late for you to open an account for your step daughter at your own bank.

Just my opinion.

4 moms found this helpful

There are so many things that just don't make any sense.

You don't state why grandma wants to open an account. Is it because hubby won't get off his but and do it, or because grandma wants to deposit money for her grandchild and help teach her grandchild important financial lessons.

You say SD lives with you, but then you say you don't want to wait until SD visits.

Where does a 10 year old get all this money that she will need to constantly be going to the bank?

A large percentage of grandparents open accounts for their grandchildren. I would NOT be concerned at all about grandma opening an account. I don't understand why you wouldn't want grandma to open an account. My FIL opened accounts for my children. Rather than being concerned, I'm extremely grateful for the fact that it'll help pay for college.

A person can have many bank accounts, so there's no reason that hubby can't open an account for her.

4 moms found this helpful

my Mom opened accounts for all of her grandchildren. She placed $$ in each acct for both birthdays & Christmas. So far, 4 out of 5 of the kids have used the accts to pay for their 1st cars....which then, in turn, allowed them to work & learn to save $$ too. My 15yo worked last summer & doubled his $$.

When they were little, they didn't get it. By teen years, they were all for it. & the ones who are much older....still appreciate what Gma did for them!

Oh, & we were also placed on the accts so that we could easily access them.....

3 moms found this helpful

I think you hit on the perfect solution at the end of your post. Yes, your husband should still plan on opening a seperate savings account for his daughter. Grandma can feel free to open a savings account if she wishes, but that doesn't obligate granddaughter to use that one only. My mom opened a savings account for my kids, but I don't contribute to it, and she doesn't expect me to. That account is for the money to stay in until the kids go to college. The savings accounts I opened for my kids are for them to have access to so they can learn to handle their own money, once they are old enough.

3 moms found this helpful

Ok, well first of all, you're out of this and you know that.

Second, my sons grandparents have each opened savings accounts for my son, they are accounts that the grandparents periodically deposit money into (for Christmas and birthdays). It is intended to be a long term savings account for something like a car or college or something significant down the line.

So, in conclusion she can have multiple savings accounts if your husband ever decides to open one for her--if he doesn't then she can have one that she may or may not contribute towards. You should have him say/do nothing about it aside from "thank you" to the grandmother, and honestly you really cannot have anything to do with or say about how her money gets saved.

Having differences of opinions in parenting is bad enough, having differences of opinion in parenting and money is a minefield you'd be WELL advised to avoid altogether.

3 moms found this helpful

I have more than one account, don't most people? My son has more than one account and he's ony 4....

I have an account for my son at my bank and my Dad has another one for him at his credit union. I guess I don't understand what the big deal is? I LOVE that Dad opened an account for him. Where I might be tempted to dip into the account I opened for him for something fun or short term, I KNOW that my Dad has much more control and the money he puts away will always be there....

3 moms found this helpful

Well, my mom and dad have accounts in all the kids' names and so do my inlaws. My parents have education accounts, his parents have investment accounts. My grandmother bought stock for my oldest son when he was born, her first Great Grandchild.
Plus we have education accounts and the kids each have their own savings accounts.
Let Grandma do it. Have her put you on the account so you can manage it too.
I think you're stressing too much about this.

3 moms found this helpful

You could have the grandma open a 529 account. It can be used only for school and she can have access to it and contol it. It grows tax free until it is needed (and could be used for private elementary school, etc). She can designate someone to inherit the control of it when she passes. My mil did this and my husband will get control of it when she passes. She contributes money to it yearly. She lives in illinois and you don't have to use your state's 529 (all states have 529). Pick one that has low fees and moves stuff automatically (lowers the risk) as your daughter gets older and closer to college (where most likely the money will be used).

2 moms found this helpful

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