26 answers

Mother-in-law Opened 529 for Kids

Ok, I need some opinions here. My mother-in-law opened a 529 savings account for my son and daughter (that she manages)as a surprise xmas present, and put $250 in each of the accounts. While this is a very nice gesture, I can't help but feel upset about it. She already knows that we have a 529 account for each of our children, as well as savings account. For me, it feels like she is saying I can't trust you if I just give you a check for the kids. I feel like I should be responsible for managing my kids financial future, not my mother-in-law. Am I completely crazy for feeling this way, if I'm not, how would you handle the situation?

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Thanks for the advice...if this came from my mother, and not my mother in law, it might be a different story. My mother in law is known for causing quite a bit of drama! I think I will just let it be.

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I believe if she opens the account then her contributions to it are tax deductible. If she just gives you the money to put into the 529 account that you opened for them then her contributions are not tax deductible. It'll also be much easier for her to have the account in her name because she can link her bank accounts directly to it and have the money automatically deposited if she chooses. There's no way for her to do that with the account that's in your name. It all goes to your kids in the end so I would be thankful.

6 moms found this helpful

What your MIL did was very generous. It's also not a bad idea to have more than one 529 account, since one might do better than the other - basically it's better not to have all your eggs in one basket. She might be trying to take advantage of tax deductions as well. I wish my MIL was in the position to be able to put aside savings for her grandchildrens' education.

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Before you get mad, you should understand that 529's are for your children.
They are the beneficiaries and it has nothing to do with whether or not you are capable of managing their financial future.
Also, it's different in different states, but it's possible that there are tax advantages for your in laws to invest in your kids' futures this way.
Many wealthy people I know have trusts and accounts for their grandkids and it's not about "managing" things for someone else. It's all a part of their own financial portfolios and investments.
They've done this for your children and I personally don't see a reason to be upset about it. Giving you a check isn't the same as investing in account they have established for the benefit of the kids.
I would be happy about this and contribute to your own 529 as you can.
I would rest easier knowing that your kids will have help with their educations when so many kids don't have anyone to contribute to that.

That's just my personal opinion.

Best wishes.

5 moms found this helpful

My grandma opens an account for every child in our family, whether we already have one or not. it's just something she does... I don't think it's anything personal.

4 moms found this helpful

Yes, you are a little crazy. My parents have an account for each of their grandchildren (in addition to the accounts we have started). Truthfully, you should be thankful that she is looking to help off-set the astronomical cost!

My grandparents started accounts for each of us when we were born. My parents were able to pay cash for our college educations (solid financial planning) and my sisters and I used "Nana's money" to pay for graduate school!

4 moms found this helpful

I honestly would just be happy she has opened one for your kids, it's her money and she can allocate it in her own style, beats my MIL who gives zero to my child and I mean zero, zero attention, zero visits, zero money, zero zero zero. I would just be grateful. Other things that are obnoxious would tend to annoy me but not this one. Just saying this is her money and she has the right on how to do it her way-- the impt thing is it's going to your kids, that is the bottom line.

4 moms found this helpful

It sounds like you have resentlment toward your MIL.

If anyone of our relatives showed interest in helping us fund our daughter's college, we would graciously say thank you. We have fully funded our 16 yr old on our own and it sure would have been nice if someone else was helping us out planning for $40,000-$70,000 worth of college expenses per year.

It's hard to fund college funds, takes a lot of discipline and unselfishness.

Suck it up and say thank you.

4 moms found this helpful

Aww, dont be upset with G., she is probably just making life easier for herself by opening that account so she can continue to gift to it for birthdays and holidays. I doubt it has anything to do with trusting you with the money. Even if it does who cares, your kids are getting another account for when they are 18, it's all good?

4 moms found this helpful

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