Giving Birth Second Time Around

My 3yr old did very well. We left for the hospital before he woke up so I had family come over and babysit him. I left a note for him on his highchair w/a special breakfast. Once we had the baby, he came to see us in the hospital.

Definitely don't wake her up. Waking toddlers up in the middle of the night rarely goes well. She'll be groggy and probably won't understand what anyone is trying to tell her anyways and she'll probably cry and cling and not want you to leave. You won't need to deal with that right then, you'll need to concentrate on what's going on with you and the baby.

Just think of it like this, if she wakes up to the news that she has a baby sister or brother, it'll be like Christmas morning for her and so exciting. Toddlers aren't good at waiting, so it'll probably be better to not draw her attention to it until the deed is done and you all can present her with her new sibling.

Good luck and congrats!

I would not wake up a 2 1/2 year old toddler to let her know mom is leaving for the hospital. If she is so attached and has never had a night away from you, why take the risk that she would have a meltdown or not go back to sleep and then be tired and cranky why she visits you at the hospital? It's also a good idea if you have family who will be caring for her while she is in the hospital to have them come and stay overnight ahead of time so she feels comfortable with them, or for her to have an overnight away from home. A toddler does not need to be part of a middle of the night hospital deparature. You handle it by simply leaving, and making sure to leave a note and gift behind for her. You will have to see how she handles visiting at the hospital. My suggestions would be that when she meets her sibling for the first time, it's just you, daddy, big sis and baby, no other family members present to witness or be part of her getting to meet her baby. The four of you are the family. I'd also suggest that dad and big sis come to pick you and baby up alone when you leave the hospital and have the homecoming be just the 4 of you.
Good luck

We went into labor in the middle of the night with my second and left for the hospital around 4:45 in the morning. My mom came to stay with my oldest (21 months old at the time). We let him sleep but woke him up early around 6:30 and brought him to the hospital complete with games and things to keep him busy. She came to the door to let us know they were at the hospital (around 7:30) when she first got there, my husband told him his baby brother would be here soon and they went to grab a quick breakfast and then back to the waiting room. The baby was born at 8:55 a.m. and as soon as the minor stitching was complete, my mom brought my oldest in the room to meet his brother. He (with a grandparent to help) stayed with us at the hospital except for nap and bedtimes. We also had a gift for him from his new baby brother that he got once we moved into the regular room from L&D. And when he had to be home with his grandma he spent his time helping her bake a "birthday" cake for his new baby brother (which of course he got to eat).

My oldest did really well with this situation and felt very included and not wierded out in the least. When my third was born my older kids were 4 and 2 and we planned something similar if it was the middle of the night. But we also let them know what the plan was if mommy and daddy had to go to the hospital. Yours is old enough that if you just tell her ahead of time it could be possible and then have the watcher bring her to the hospital as soon as she wakes up she will be just fine!

Hello and congrats! My son was about 2 1/2 when his little sister was born. We had it set up with my mom so caller her at 3 in the morning when I was told to go to the hospital made it a little easier. But we also told our son every night that baby sister could come tonight so if you wake up and Grammy is here don't worry we will see you soon. Unfortunately I had her when all the h1n1 stuff was going on and the hospital had a ban on children coming to visit. This made me very sad because when my son was born I stayed 2 days and planned to stay 2 days when my daughter was born too. I did have a very fast delivery so I went in at 3 and had my daughter at 4:25 that same morning. So when I knew my son was up we called him. I like the present idea. Or maybe a card with a special message. Also having the sister-in-law keep her busy with a special trip to the mall to buy the new baby a cute outfit or a new toy. Anything to keep her mind off of mom and dad being gone. The adjustments at home are the hardest the first few weeks. Between you recovering from birth and taking care of a new baby and a 3 year old things will be difficult in the beginning. However they will get easier when you get into a routine. Then when the baby is around 6 or 8 weeks and starts smiling your 3 year old will really like her then when she starts sitting up and playing your 3 year old will be head over heals in love. We made the mistake of thinking our son would love our daughter as much as we did from the beginning but that was not the case. I hope it is different for your daughter but if it isn't just give her time and try to find some one on one time with just her, this really helped my son. Hope this helped! Good Luck with labor!

We have a 4yo and a 3mo. This is what we did.

Read a lot of books about becoming an older sibling.
Read a lot of books about babies.
Talked about it a lot.
Arranged for best friend (with child similar age) to watch him while we are in hospital.
Told 4yo the plan...when baby decides it is time for his birth day, Mama and Daddy will have to go to the hospital to help him be born. You will go with Auntie L to have a sleepover. If baby decides he wants to be born at night, Auntie L will be here when you wake up. You can come see Mama and Daddy as soon as baby is born! (be really excited about it all!)
When I felt like labor was coming, told him baby is thinking about having his birth day! A few times we woke up the next morning and said, "guess he's not ready yet...but it will be soon!"
Baby did decide to come in the middle of the night. Called friend and had her stay the night. Did NOT wake up 4yo!
When he woke up in the a.m., friend told him "Baby decided he was ready for his birthday! And we'll go see him later today!"
Mama and Daddy left a gift bag for 4yo with a short note from us, big brother t-shirt, big boy toy, cuddly toy, and a lovey for the baby. It was 4yo's job to bring lovey to the hospital for the baby.
They came in the a.m. and spent a couple of hours. Then friend took kids swimming, to park, on a hike....kept them busy with really fun things. Had a sleepover. 4yo was a VERY BIG BOY the whole time. We were a little worried...but there is only so much you can do! He did a GREAT job!
They visited again the next a.m. for a couple of hours. We were all home together by dinnertime!

It was a WONDERFUL experience. 4yo had a GREAT time. Mama and Daddy got the time we needed with the new baby. It couldn't have gone smoother! And big brother LOVES his baby!

I don't think I would wake her up. She will be groggy and I think it could easily tip the scales into tantrum and tear mode and you DO NOT need that, and neither does she. I think you should probably just start talking to her now about the possibilities. SHe knows you're having a baby so start telling her when "it" happens, Aunt So-and-So is coming over and you guys are going to play, etc. etc. Tell her if it happens in the middle of night that you and dad are going to leave but when she wakes up Auntie will be here and not to worry. She's pretty close to 3 and I think she can probably understand all that. I would caution that she might not sleep well at night for a few nights b/c she might be "worried" that it will happen and you'll be gone, but I think I'd rather take that over a meltdown. My daughter was exactly 2 when my son was born and she understood a lot too so I just kept telling her what to expect and where she was going to be, etc. I had a scheduled c-section so it was a bit different for sure, but my daughter needs a lot of information to feel comfortable with change!

I absolutely think your daughter should come visit at the hospital every day and be a part of things, but remember she's 2...she does not want to hang out there all day. She needs to play and have fun and in my opinion does not have to stay at the hospital for hours.

I also wanted to add that if you can get her spending the night without you at a willing family members house you need to get on it! Seriously...your life will be so wonderful for that few extra hours in the morning that you have to yourself. If you could even do it before baby is born you could maybe get some nights in the near future that would be helpful when you'll be up with Baby all night anyway. Sleepovers can change your life...embrace them!!:)

There's only so much you can plan for, so you almost can't be 100% ready. ;-) I only say this, because although you might know it, you still want to try.

I think you need to wake up your daughter and let her know you're going to the hospital, but that the hospital won't let her go just yet because they have to take care of YOU first. Let her know that they will let her visit and you'll call her as soon as you can, but this way she knows to keep you in her thoughts. You said you got some presents, so maybe she needs to have a present ready for her baby sister too! That might be a good time to tell her that her job includes getting everything ready and just right for when she does go to the hospital to see you.

When I got pregnant with my second child (I have two girls), I prepared my first child by telling her she was going to be a big sister. This helped her look forward to things. Well, my labor only lasted 45 minutes from the time I went into the hospital to the time I was wheeled upstairs and gave birth. (I could enjoy those drugs all for myself by the time they kicked in...lol) My husband had gone with my daughter to get gas and by the time they came back, little sister had been born. My first daughter wanted to know where she was. They were able to visit the nursery and the nurses let her wheel in her baby sister into our room. She felt so proud to be a big sister and see that little tiny baby. Her face and reactions were priceless and awesome!

In short...I think as much that you can involve her, do, but let her know that she can't be there all the time. Tell her you need her to make sure the house is ready and that since you can't be there, maybe that would be her job. I hope some of this helps! Good luck!

I wouldn't think it should be necessary to wake your little girl up in the middle of the night, it seems she is still very young and you definitely DON'T want to bring her to the hospital ~ I work in the hospital and it is one of the the "germiest" places to be, please don't expose her to anything unnecessarily. She will have years to be "involved" with her new sibling and you won't be gone for an extended period of time.

Congratulations!
I don't think waking a 3 yr old up in the middle of the night would work very well. It would take her quite awhile to come to enough to really comprehend that Mom is going to the hospital to have her new sister. Hopefully it wont be a middle of the night labor so quit worrying about it or you will get less sleep than you already are! ;) Just remember you can labor for a pretty long time... stay at home as long as you can before going to the hospital.
I think you should explain to your daughter that maybe you might be gone one morning because you are ready to have her sister---but Aunt so and so will be there in the morning when she wakes up. Trust me, you are more worried about it than your daughter is. Don't stress, it will all be fine.

i definatly would not wake her up. i would let it be more like a great supprise when she woke up that she is soon going to have a new baby in the family.

My DD1 was 3 when DD2 came along... We woke her up and dropped her off at the designated friend's house... I had quick labors so spending the whole day apart from mommy or daddy wasn't a problem for us. But you'd be very surprised at how well she'll do the whole day without you. And since your daughter will be spending time with her soon to be aunt, she'll have some great bonding time.
A few hours after DD2 was born, my DH left to go and bring DD1 to the hospital so she could come and see her new little sister. A few weeks before we made a shirt for her that exclaimed that she was the big sister. She even painted a little onsie for the baby. We had a lot of fun making those! She came back every day twice a day with daddy to visit.

I wouldn't wake her. I would however make a card for her and have a little present (like a shirt that says "Big Sis") so when she wakes up your sister-in-law can give it to her and tell her that you've gone to have the baby. Then as soon as it's ok, have your sister-in-law take her to the hospital. (Also don't forget to leave her a car seat so she can bring her up to the hospital!)

Good luck and Congrats!

She knows a baby is coming, whomever is watching her can tell her when she wakes up(if it happens at night) that Mommy went to the hospital because the new baby is here or coming. If you arrange for your SIL to bring her to visit you when the baby arrives that is probably good enough. My 5 yo walked into the room during a baby story and was traumatized seeing the woman in labor, he also saw a baby delivered via c-section on that show and was shocked about all of the blood(and that is tv). I would try to help her avoid ALL of that part of the scene, she just wants to see the new baby.

I just went thru the same thing!! My son is now 4 weeks old and my daughter is 3 yrs old. All of our family is out of town and we had difficulty finding someone to help us out. I ended up hiring a babysitter to sleep over in case I went into labour in the middle of the night. I wanted to make sure my daughter was comfortable with her in case she woke up and we were gone. I prepared my daugher that we may have to go to the hospital in the middle of the night so that she wouldn't be upset to not find us in the morning. I really did not want to disturb her sleep and decided to just bring her to the hospital once the baby was born. It worked out just fine!
Good luck!

Don't wake her up. Call sister-in-law, she'll come over. When daughter wakes up she can tell her that you and your husband are at the hospital to have the baby. When they come to the hospital, she "hold" the baby with help. Don't overdo it with presents from new baby. She doesn't need that. Just make sure you do spend some time with her. There will be some resentment no matter what you do because she is 3 and therefore immature.

Personally I would not wake her up. I would start talking about her new aunt will be staying with her while you are in the hospital and tell her that if the baby decides to come in the middle of the night her new aunt will be getting her up in the morning to start her day. If she is mature she will be able to figure this out. Good luck with the new little one.

L.