Faking Being Gay

omg. That is not all that's tragic. I had a major grandma moment today (and I'm just a mom). I have a crazy background and time happily served in NYC and LA in the music and fashion scene, but now I live in central PA with my very young kids (got a late start). Today we went to a local McDonald's play yard to avoid some rain. School let out and a flock of teens came to "hang out" out in the kiddie room at McDonalds (I know, lame). There was also an Amish family in there with their four small kids playing. We're talking long dresses, bonnets, hushed tones, well behaved sweet kids and all. This area has a huge Amish and Mennonite population. It's fairly rural and the towns are very small. There isn't much crime, and one would think the non Amish teens aren't "too scary" even though I have heard stories. This particular town is very small, and mainly farm families.

Do you think for one minute those bratty messed up little teeny boppers in their "nouveau punk rock" (so tired when you've seen the trend pass several times in the last 40 years) fashions and garish make up (the kids could not have been older than 13) cared one bit that there was a highly religious family in the play room (or anyone else for that matter) before using vile language, making explicit gestures to each other, sitting on each other's laps feigning sexual positions (not even joking), taking each other's stuff and throwing it on top of the play equipment playing keep away and then "fighting" and slapping each other using the f word a thousand times.
I've never been so embarrassed for ...I don't even know who..them I guess... There were the two extreme opposites in populations, and I felt very uncomfortable in the middle. What IS wrong with kids today? Where are their PARENTS??!! Call me crazy, but I dont' intend to let my kids 1) act like idiots, and 2) loiter around at McDonalds when they should be working there.

8 moms found this helpful

EXTREMELY SAD AND TRAGIC....

I think that's enough said - right? either way - gay or straight acting the opposite is VERY sad...

6 moms found this helpful

It's sad that girls think that they have to do what they think boys like, even when it's so "out there", just to get a guy to like them!

And sad too, to just assume that every boy is going to think that way. It isn't true, and it's insulting to the boys.

Sigh...

D.

6 moms found this helpful

The sad thing is- is that girls will do anything to attract boys. We all know that men LOVE to see woman on woman stuff (why? I do not know. I'm old enough to know and have been married twice, that men love seeing women with each other... yep it's a sick, male compulsion). So, if a young girl that doesnt "value" herself much for one reason or another or that is easy prey to peer pressure, will be with another girl just to attract male attention.
Thank you God for giving me sons because I would have never been able to handle that nonsense.
These days are so crazy! Teens do crazy stuff. Most of it is phase for attention and/or learning experience, but I'm so glad I'm not a mom of youngsters right now. My hat is off to all of you ladies raising kids in this "everything goes" society.

5 moms found this helpful

Teenagers "try on" a lot of roles to see where they fit in; it's very normal. I respect that it seems serious to you, but I really doubt any long-term harm will come of this. And it won't change their sexual orientation. Every single gay adult ever, I think, desperately tried to be straight at some point, and it didn't work. It doesn't work the other way either.

4 moms found this helpful

we had two girls do this in a small town they wanted to freak the teachers and parents out. the kids ended up turning on them for FAKING it.
there are actually real gay people in the town who did not appreciate being made fun of or the stereotyping.

4 moms found this helpful

Well, it seems that being gay has gone from being taboo to being trendy now. It's unfortunate for all the people who have felt forced to be someone else, to finally be accepted, only to now have confused, desperate people treat it as a joke, or a passing fad to garner attention or be cool.

3 moms found this helpful

Teens are still exploring what their personal identities are. This is just one more are to explore.

3 moms found this helpful

When kids are bombarded by this from all directions (tv shows like Degrasse, for example) it is no surprise to me that they are experimenting with it. It is sad what kids will do to be cool or accepted.

3 moms found this helpful

This is just another way to experiment with identity, rebellion, etc... kids are strange.

3 moms found this helpful

Is it really so different from gay teens trying to act straight in order to fit in?
and there have always been girls willing to sleep around in order to be popular and cool, that's sad. and its always been sad that it's more OK for guys to sleep around.

2 moms found this helpful

I agree with you! It scares me for when my children are teens, I just hope they have enough self respect not to think they have to do these stupid things!

2 moms found this helpful

I agree with the idea that girls with low self esteem do this because they *think* it's what boys want to see or be around. Just sad.

2 moms found this helpful

No, I don't think so. It is hip and cool to be gay now. With all the stuff in pop culture, it does not surprise me one bit. Two girls making out is a huge turn on to many guys. In this age of acceptance and awareness, anything goes.

2 moms found this helpful

Haven't heard of that before your post. But I did know that some of the kids at my son's previous middle school (6-8 grade) would say/pretend to have a girlfriend/boyfriend just so other kids would leave them alone. It wasn't just one poor kid, but a lot of them apparently did this. Girls and boys. Makes you wonder, doesn't it?

Why do they feel it's so necessary to "be involved" at such a young age? The funny thing is, apparently these kids didn't WANT to be "involved" and rather than just leaving it at that, they were making up boyfriends/girlfriends to avoid having to say so. They think that THEY are the odd one out to not be consumed with having a bf/gf at age 11/12!! It's absurd. I think it is all part of the over-sexualization of these younger generations at SUCH young ages. Looked in the girls (not teens, "GIRLS") department lately? Watched any "teen" Disney shows lately? How many girls do you know who get mani/pedi's to bond with Mom? How many are dying their hair at age 12? How many start with the makeup at 10 and the piercings at 14?? Remember the discussion on here over the summer about padded bathing suit tops for GIRLS? The kids at my son's school seem to me to be screaming that they aren't ready for all the sexuality yet.... but the media and society in general just keeps on pushing it at them earlier and earlier.

2 moms found this helpful

Well, this is not the first sexual revolution! I'm sure my Grandmother was equally revolted by the PDAs of the 60s.

I wonder what I would do if I were a teenager these days?! My kids (all three teenagers) seem to take it all in stride.

:)

2 moms found this helpful

I think it's really exciting.

It's always happened (both the experimentation AND each generation thinking they invented sex), but it's okay to TALK about now/ be any sexID you are... which is the exciting part.

It also means far fewer GLBT kids have to hide &/or waste years not understanding their own ID.

2 moms found this helpful

I've been seeing this for years...it is so sad! It demoralizes those that are "truly gay" and demoralizes those that are just pretending. I have had a number friends that have been "victimized" simply because they have been honest with themselves and others and I have seen heterosexuals "switch teams" so that they can "conform" ACK!!!! REALLY???? I feel for these young people that feel the need to "experiment" just to "fit in". It isn't something that that will enrich their lives, rather it is something that will detract from who they really are. I'm not trying to take away their "fun", I would just love for them to really be honest about their "why's" The reason's for their deviancy scares the hell outta me!!!

2 moms found this helpful

I find many things young girls do for the attention of guys to be quite disturbing. Some day, they will realize that they don't want the kind of guy who wants them to fake anything. And they don't want the kind of guy who pushes them to do things they don't want to do.

Wish it was easier to get that through their thick skulls! I know we all did stupid stuff as teens/young adults as well; often disturbing too.

1 mom found this helpful

To me it is sad that some girls today have such low self esteem that they have to pretend to be anything but themselves to attract men. What the hell happened to just being yourself, when did that not become enough. I do not think this is just experimenting and if that was the case I get it. But if a girl is doing this to attract attention from boys then yes I am with you!!!

1 mom found this helpful

You know this is like those girls that get on the dance floor and grind all over each other thinking it's sexy. Really they look pathetic. Hopefully this idea fizzles out soon. I agree with you that unsuspecting people might get hurt. More than likely the other person is pretending as well, I think that they won't take the risk of having to make out with someone of their own gender, but I have been wrong before. What are they going to do when some loser wants a threesome?

1 mom found this helpful

This became cool in my area when I was in college. I interned at a radio station where the most popular feature far and away was a weekly "bi day" dating show where attractive young women would come in and take calls on the air from other women who were interested in dating them. The DJ and staff (and most of the listeners) were young men lusting for details of how the girls looked, what they would be willing to do on a date, etc. Lots of girls "came out of the closet" at my high school who were a few years behind me. For most of them it was a short-lived phase. My two 13-year-olds have been talking about "bi" kids for at least a year. Most are girls and most, I suspect, are not. I find it interesting that it's still not cool for boys to be gay or bi, and it's not cool for girls to be lesbians. Just "bi," to get attention from boys who think that girls being together is hot. Ridiculous.

1 mom found this helpful

i'm 28 and when I was a teen this seemed to be just starting, (myself excluded b/c i was a stright edge goody goody hanging out with the bad kids) all of the girls I knew did this for guys attention. It was common to see teen girls making out and also to be "switching off" with guys. I hope this fads out before my daughter gets older. I don;t think its bad to experiment but bad to do so just to please a guy

It seems like morals fall a little bit each generation. When I was 30 something and met a couple of girls that were 20 something it really surprised me to find out some of the things they were doing. It is really pretty common nowadays for girls to be bisexual and make out with other girls. These ladies (that I speak of) were both married and had kids but were willing to get it on with each other anytime. The husband sometimes watched and would really enjoy the show I guess. I remember one of the girls telling me that for her husband's birthday the women were asked to have sex in front of him for his present. I almost through up!! They also told me that they shared the same bed along with another couple on their honeymoon. I don't think the teenage girls as pretending to be gay. I think they are bisexual and are not showing the best judgement. The guys find this to be such a big turn on because they can have a threesome.