Easter Bunny, Leprechauns and the Like

I think using the word lie is a little harsh. The Easter bunny used to come to my house and 'poop' I'd leave out prunes lol sorry if that sound disgusting. I forgot who gave me that idea. But anyways my girls still laugh about it remembering it. It is called childhood memories.

It doesn't bother me to let my children believe in magical things.

I grew up in a very strict household where we weren't allowed to believe in "magic" anything. I wasn't allowed Santa, the Easter Bunny and don't get me started on Halloween.

Then when I grew up I realized Halloween was about getting free candy and that the other magical stuff was about imagination and fun. It's about pretend.

The realities of life come way too quickly. I am happy to let my kids have fantasy for as long as they can.

Nope. Not one bit. We all grew up with Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Toothfairy, etc and most of us are pretty darn normal.

Deception has a negative connotation. Letting your children believe in something magical and fun is not negative.

Tell them the truth when they start to suspect something. Don't worry... you'll only have to be a "liar" for another year or two.

Lighten up a little. Life is much happier when you believe in a little bit of magic and mystery.

I've never understood why encouraging children to believe in Santa or the Easter Bunny could ever be a negative. Is it because I have happy memories of these as a child?

My siblings and in-laws and I have all talked about the moment we "realized the truth." For most of us, there was a short period of disappointment. But then we decided that it was ok with us that the gives came from our parents. I mean, I gift is a gift, right? Who cares if it comes from Santa or Mom and Dad? Now we all have fun stories to share. It's like a rite of passage.

Try not to over think it. It's a fun part of childhood. It's like Cinderella's Castle at Disney. It really is ok if little girls think Cinderella lives there. It won't be long before they understand that Disney Princesses are just characters, but for now ... a little magic never hurt anyone.

Have YOU ever been to Disney or another "magical" theme park? Did you experience joy and fun and wonder during your time there? Did you know that the woman playing "Belle" wasn't really the cartoon character from the movie?

It's called imagination and all kids have one, and they use them to grow, develop and learn. I wouldn't call it lying because once kids reach a certain age (8-12), they "realize" that these characters just cannot be real. Is it maybe a little sad or disappointing to come to the conclusion? YES! But if you asked any kid if they would have rather be told at a young age that they were all fake, and that they would miss out on all those glorious memories, I'd bet millions (if I had it) that they'd say NO WAY!

Also, for the religious themed holidays, we always try to put Christ first and Santa or the Easter bunny last. I think this is the responsibility of the parent to teach the true meanings of Christmas and Easter. If you don't, then maybe the holidays won't ever hold a special place in their hearts once they realize that Santa and the bunny aren't real...

You need to determine where your kids stand on all of this. I think they're a little young to burst the bubble. Your 7 year old will probably start figuring it out soon enough. Talk to your MIL about your feelings and compromise.

I look at these holiday characters as young, innocent magic. Your kids are only little once. Let them be sparkly and magical for awhile. :)

well, leprauchauns and faeries are real.
the easter bunny is just silly.
:) khairete
S.

Don't you have happy childhood memories of the magic surrounding these holidays? I can't think of one adult that wishes their parents had just told the truth rather than let them enjoy the fantasy. I am quite positive that my ten year old knows the truth, but he enjoys it all too much to end it, and he doesn't want to spoil it for anyone else.

let them have their magic and your mom have her fun

They aren't being lied to any more then when they watch a movie or read a book and temporarily transport themselves to those circumstances. Magic of childhood is good. If you have ever taken a young preschooler to Disney you get it - losing the magic of youth is sad, seeing the belief is what makes life worth living.

I always ask myself - will this cause harm in any way? will this hurt them or others emotionally? For the things you mentioned, no is the answer to both questions.

My girls are 10 and 13 and I wish they hadn't discovered truths as soon as they did, and they wish so too. They liked the magic and ask for us to pretend they don't know.

omg don't watch Rise of the Guardians!

"Deception"? That's funny. I think posts like these are sad. Since when was it bad for a little kid to believe in make believe and fantasies, and use their imaginations? This period of their lives is so short, and then they become jaded just like us adults.

I'm assuming you don't let your kids play video games, worship super heroes, go to Disneyland, or watch TV or movies, because, you know, those are all made up characters, too. You wouldn't want to deceive them by letting them think Super Mario, Superman, Buzz Lightyear, or Lightning McQueen was real.

Personally, I couldn't imagine having a childhood without Santa, The Tooth Fairy, The Easter Bunny, Cinderella, Scooby Doo and the Smurfs. And I couldn't imagine depriving my child of the wonderment that is make believe.

I believe in being honest with my son. I do not lie to him to make my life easier. But I do believe in magic. What's wrong with fantasy? When you go to a magic show, do you tell your child it's all tricks? Childhood is an innocent time, let them be little! I do tell him that the Easter Bunny that you take pictures with is someone in a costume because he was afraid of it and it seemed fairly obvious that it's a costume.
If you don't want to perpetuate holiday fantasy, then keep it simple. Never say anything that makes you feel wierd. I am much more upset at my parents lying to me and deceiving me because they thought I was too young or stupid to know better than because they let me believe in Santa.

You can tell them the truth any time you wish to do so. If you don't want your kids to believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny, the tooth fairy, etc., you are under no obligation to pretend they are real.

Does the deception bother me? No, not really. Do we engage in it? No, not really. We're surrounded, in life, with people who don't believe as we do in a vast myriad of ways. Some people play the Santa thing to the hilt. My husband and I decided not to do Santa or the Easter bunny. We're very scientifically-minded people, and we want to portray facts as facts and beliefs as beliefs, so we've approached the holiday characters the way we approach religion: we tell the children what we believe, and why, but then also tell them that other people believe different things, and they have lots of reasons for believing those things. Some people believe differently, and as long as it isn't hurting anyone, we are respectful of that. This can apply to Santa as well.

Most of my friends do the Santa thing, and we work hard to make sure our kids don't "spoil" it for their kids (only time will tell if it's working).
I think it all comes down to what YOU are comfortable with, and it sounds like you are uncomfortable with the game continuing. It doesn't matter if other people think your kids are still young enough to believe, if you don't, then you don't have to continue. I'm not sure I would call this "lying," so much as a different parenting approach. However, as is almost always true with the MIL, you are the parent, and she doesn't get to decide how to raise your kids.

So, if you decide you are truly uncomfortable, don't participate and "cover up" for your MIL. But also, don't tell your kids that Grandma has been lying to them. At some point when they are asking questions, just ask the kids what they believe, and make them reason through it. If what they say bothers you, mention to them that this is what grandma believes and that's okay. But it isn't what you believe. Then, you've at least planted the idea that things may not be cut and dry.

Good luck.

I haven't read the others all the way through because when I started to, I get annoyed with the way the question is twisted.

I just left a gold coin under my daughter's pillow last night as I pretended to be the tooth fairy. I go back and forth between delight in the story and the heebee geebee's that this is all a little creepy.

We read a lot of stories, we tell stories and use our imagination together, but to willingly participate in deception, it just feels strange. My daughter knows all about 'characters', I describe what people believe, but I don't see why childhood can't be magical without adults willingly lying to them. Nature and imagination are magical.

Just like religion and belief in god or gods, its what people believe. MIL believes in these conversations and this reality. You don't have to participate, but I'm with you, ambivalent.

When my kids were little, I told them that S. Claus, E. Bunny, and all those other personalities were games to play. They learned what the special days were truly about, and I hope I taught them to appreciate the real deals.

Many people like to play the games, though. In fact, we read the best of the books. My children played Easter bunny by decorating eggs and taking Easter baskets to the neighbors. They helped to be Mr. Claus for the rest of the family at Christmas. The old stories about leprechauns are a lot of fun. Your children's Grandma evidently loves to play those games, too, and maybe they can play with her to make her happy - *as long as* they understand about the Real Things. Six- and seven-year-olds are learning to separate fantasy from reality, and when they learn to understand the realities maybe they can have a little fun with the make-believe.