Depression - Grand Prairie,TX

Depression is not a one time thing. It is a lifetime.

It is very normal for people to experience it at one time or another and the things in our lives that happen can cause flare ups, being over worked can bring it on, being stressed can bring it on..

And for others, it is their "normal."

You know what you need to do and if you cannot do it, ASK for help. I KNOW this takes energy, but please ask for help.

Make an appointment ASAP to see your physician. Make an appointment to see a therapist. At least with the therapist you can talk about the co worker, maybe even come up with a plan on either how to handle it, search for a new job, or figure a way to put up with it.

In the mean time, ask a dear friend or a relative to help you with the things that are too much for you to handle. Even if it is coming over and helping you clean and shop for the weekend.

I am sending you strength. I totally get where you are coming from. It makes me frustrated, angry, embarrassed and exhausted. Too much..
But when I find the courage to at least ask for help, I feel like I am 75% of the way to where I need to be.

When someone has had significant depression at one point in their life, it is not unusual for them to experience it or anxiety again. I'm sorry for your loss of your daughter, something that will always be difficult. And now, work is difficult.

I fully realize that you need to see a professional now, and that my advice is only arm-chair advice. But I'm going to make suggestions, because I want you to know that you can feel better, NOW. That you deserve to feel better. That you must do this for yourself and your family. That the meds that seemed too much before are not the meds you have to have now. So here goes....

It could be that appropriate short-term anti-anxiety meds could be very helpful right now, today. I say short-term, because I have noticed that folks who are in immediate stressful situations often can begin dealing with them. They work immediately, can be taken in very small doses, only as needed. Then you and your therapist can decide whether longer term medications (at a lower level than 5 years ago or even a different medication) would be helpful. I say "your therapist" because that is another step you would greatly benenfit from. Please, please don't delay. There is a solution and there is a better tomorrow. Please.

I am so sorry to read how overwhelmed you are, truly. While I haven't been through the same traumatic experiences you have, I have suffered from depression, and know how hard it is to find a reason to keep going & be positive. So first of all, good for you to recognize that you are in a difficult place & to reach out for help.

Second, realize that taking steps towards feeling better is going to take time. Nothing you do is going to allow you to wake up tomorrow all of a sudden wanting to go to work and having an easy time taking care of your children. It will be a step-by-step process, and you may not realize things are getting better. So, I would encourage you to journal, weekly (or daily if it helps) so that you can look back & see how far you've come.

Find out if your HR department has an employee assistance program. Some larger companies do - you can contact them privately for assistance with many things, including depression, and get a start at opening up with someone, and help with referrals to continuing care.

Depending on the coverage through your insurance, I would also suggest making an appointment with a psychologist. It sounds like in the past, medication was a significant factor in helping you to take control of yourself and move forward, but I think the opportunity to also sit down with someone and talk about past events and current problems is a necessity to help you overcome your feelings.

If you haven't done that before, I will say up front, it is not easy. And sometimes it takes a session or two before you are comfortable with the therapist, and sometimes it takes a couple therapists before you find one that you really "click" with. But don't let those attempts scare you off.

You mention depression & anxiety - the depression makes it hard to want to move forward to making things better, and the anxiety will freeze you from taking the steps once you decide to do something. Recognize that, and fight the urge to just run & hide.

I am hopeful that you have a close friend or family member you can confide in, who can encourage you and support you. Reach out to them, share what you did with me, even if it is just to show them what you wrote. Ask them if they can be there for you in some way, either to watch your kids when you have an appointment, or to check in with you weekly to give you positive encouragement and keep you focused.

If you don't have assistance through HR, and don't have coverage for therapy sessions, reach out to the community help line www.211.org for assistance in finding what you need in your area.

And if you just need someone to talk to, send me a message. T.

You might need to be back on meds temporarily. I would start looking for another job. There is nothing worse than going to a job you are not happy at. Try and get to a therapist that can get you over this rough time. I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine.

You said you never talked about your daughter and it caused problems with your husband. You're saying you hold a lot in at work under stressful conditions. You have every reason to feel anxious and depressed. It's time to talk to someone and let it all out. It won't be easy. It may be painful, but you're probably in the state that you're in because you've never allowed yourself to grieve properly. Find a therapist and start allowing yourself to let things out. Best of luck to you.

You need a good girlfriend. Shop for one in an aerobics class, church, reconnect with someone from your past, an adult niece or cousin.

I'm so saddened by all of the loneliness in our culture.

Blessings to you.

i can't imagine the pain you are in, and give you HUGE props for soldiering on, and doing what you need to do for your kids. you are a heroine.
are you still married? what role does your husband play, both in supporting you and taking care of your children?
a lot of breakthroughs have occurred in the treatment of depression and anxiety. sometimes medications are necessary and life-saving- talk to your physician and try something else. unfortunately you may have to be your own guinea pig while you figure out what works best for you. but there IS help available, both pharmaceutically and therapeutically. it is very, very important that you speak to a professional and do it soon. we can give you support and encouragement, but the real help you need to turn the corner is with a trained therapist who can give you concrete ways to turn your life, and thus your children's lives around and put you on a positive trajectory.
i think you're right not to take the co-worker issue to HR, especially if you feel it won't help. doing things that don't help will just depress you further. instead talk to them about what options for health care are available to you, and use them. you can't change your co-workers, but you can change how you react to her and other challenges.
you've had to deal with the worst situation that any person has to deal with. be gentle with yourself, and get yourself the help you need and deserve.
khairete
S.