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Daughter Misses the Kindergarten Cut off Date by 11 Days.

Hi, my daughter turns 5 on September 12th and where I live (in Maryland) you have to be 5 by September 1st. Should I try to get her in early admission? This would be her very first school setting since she stays home with me. I wonder if it will be too overwhelming for her being away from home. I know the other option is to wait until next year and if I do how can I enroll her into prek? Our school district has a policy for prekindergartners-they must fall into any of the four categories-cat.1-economically disadvantaged children,cat.2-english as their second language, cat 3-children with special needs. Children will be selected from Category 1 before moving to the other categories. This year, they filled up on cat 1 and cat 2 children which left my daughter out of the running to be enrolled into pre k for this year and possibly for next year. I need some advice from anyone who has experienced this before.

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The cut-off date is in place for a reason. Wait until next school year to have her start kindergarten.

1 mom found this helpful

If they will allow early admissions, then yes I would! Children learn at such a faster rate than most people realize. Some states won't allow them to enter Kindergarten even though the are just a few days past the cut off. But if they allow, I say go for it. Do not wait.

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She needs to be with kids her own age. If they have a rule it should be followed. If every mother who thought her child should be the exception to the rule got what they wanted then Kindergarten would be for 4 yr olds and not 5-6 year olds.

Kids are supposed to be 5-6 in Kindergarten, 6-7 in first grade, 7-8 in second and so on and on. That way they are 17-18 their senior year and not 16-17. Do you really want her going off to college at 17?

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She's better off waiting until next year for kindergarten.

4 moms found this helpful

She would be better off waiting a year, she's really too young to start kinder. Send her to a church Pre-K program. They are generally 2-3 days a week and quite affordable.

2 moms found this helpful

My daughers birthday is 2 weeks before the cutoff. I put her in preK for 3 years before she started kindergarten... when the time finally came, she was ready :) Get your daughter in 1/2 day preschool to socially and mentally prepare her, and next year will be a breeze!

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My daughter is in the same boat. She turns 5 on September 20th and the cutoff is September 1st. She attends preschool 3 says a week. Her teacher has said it is a shame that she will not be allowed to go to Kindergarten in the fall since she is at the top academically and maturity-wise. She is reading, spelling, and doing addition and subtraction. We plan on petitioning the school district and the school to see if she can be allowed in to school one year early. I am a former teacher and believe that if she tests in to kindergarten early then it was meant to be. If she isn't ready then she isn't ready. I was one of the oldest and my husband was the absolute youngest in our class. I have seen both ends of the spectrum.

Now if I had a child who had not attended preschool and did not show academic readiness I would not push the issue. Of course every parent will do what is best for their family. Good luck!

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Can't you just send her to a small, local pre-school, like at a church school for example? Our district is pretty strict about the K cut off dates. And since this is her first "school" experience, pre-school might be a good thing. I would say if she was in pre-school last year, have her tested but since she's never been to school, might be good to wait for K. Good luck!

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I have relatives and close friends who are teachers. One works with behavorial issues in younger children. They ALL say that it is WAY harder to be the youngest kid in the class than the oldest. They highly reccommend that you wait the time. Espcially when you say that she hasn't been to preschool, I would reccommend you wait - it will not hurt anything to wait. If I were you, I would enroll her in a preschool of some kind in the time between now and when she starts kindergarten.

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I think it really depends on your daughter. Is she very mature for her age? Does she already know the basics that should be known before entering school? How is she with other kids and being away from you?

My son will also miss the cut off next year but we are having him tested to have him enter early. I am certain that he is gifted and is so mature for his age. He works great with other kids and has no problem being away from us for long periods of time. I know he'll do great. If my daughter who is now in 1st grade would have been in this situation, I would have had her wait. She's also very bright and does great in school but I don't think she would have been able to handle it as well as I know my son would.

The kids have to be tested educationally and also by a Psychologist to see if they are emotionally ready too. They won’t allow you to put your daughter in if they don’t feel she won’t make it. You could always test her and go from there. Good luck with whatever you decide.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi J., when my boy's started school our cut off date was December 1st, they both have fall birthdays so we went for it (we also had a half day kindergarten in a tiny Catholic School).

They've both done very well being young for their grade level.

But in hindsight, now that one is away at college and the other will graduate high school next year, I wonder, what's the big hurry? Almost wished I'd kept them home another year.

Here there are no state preschool programs, only private. The church related ones are usually shorter and less expensive, might be worth it to ask around. Or even a part time daycare seting has preschool classes.

:)

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An extra year in preschool will never hurt. I sent my son to a young fives program before K...now he's top of his class. Why rush, you are only giving them an extra year to grow up and work....

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Go to the school and have a talk with them. Being so close to the cut off, it is really up to you. I had one who was an October birthday, so we did not have a choice, and she did fine.

Let me tell you about one risk associated with being the oldest in the class. Children can learn to read and write with good flexiblity before age 9 or so. After that time, learning to read and write is much harder and children who are still struggling with decoding issues after that time will run a much higher risk of reading failure. This may not apply to your child whatsoever, but if it does, you will be very happy to have one extra year to remedate the issue, and one extra year to know that you have a problem.

This is the reason Kindergarten redshirting is not a good idea. Some very smart kids have issues learning to decode, and if they slip through the cracks (really, peoples fingers) then they may have complete reading failure. It is a gamble. The risk is greater than you think, 14% of children will have some kind of learning issue or disablity, and at least 80% of those will not involve any cognative issue at all, meaning that these would be average to above average IQ'ed children. It is a cacluated risk.

Find out if going to school early is even an option, she may test in, and then you have to ask if you want her to go or not. Many children do just fine without any formal school at all prior to Kindergarten, so I would not let that be too much of a deciding factor.

M.

1 mom found this helpful

that policy sucks.
my son misses it by like a month. i've decided its a good thing.
they'll be ahead of the gang. i think the youngest tends to struggle in certain areas. i'd look for preschool else where (park district?)

1 mom found this helpful

No, don't try for early admission. Esp since she has never been in a school environment. Think about putting he in a church preK program instead.

My son is 9/7 and I also thought about doing this...he was also very bright (currently in gifted education) and very mature. I am glad I waited though-mainly for the social aspect. I have seen first hand the immaturity of the younger kids vs. the older in K and first grade...huge difference. Many youngers struggled and would have done so much better had they been held. I will say that I have seen it even out since my son is in 3rd grade, but do you really want to have a couple not so great years to get to that point?

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I would definitely wait another year to start her. That way she's for sure ready for kindergarten.

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I say give her another year to mature. My birthday is on 9/6 and I breezed my way through school and college. My niece's birthday is 9/10 and she is currently a senior ranked 3rd in a class of 700 students.

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When being faced with the Csection for my child, I got to chose from a few dates...and I chose August 31st, so I would ahve the choice! LOL..I was thinking ahead! I knew our local areas long standing cut off was Sept 1st.

In the end, after just a half year of evening preschool thru the commun ity center, I did have my daughter start on time, and all but the few kids who skipped grades at some point, she is the youngest in her grade all the time. She has always been an A student, with few slips into the B's (she hates math! LOL), but has great natural artistic talent so now attends an Arts High School she was accepted into.

I also do home childcare, so have seen alot of the September babies (one daycare child..whose parents are good friends of ours...has a Sept 2nd b-day...so he had to wait....and is now in all sorts of accelerated reading classes, etc). There is some new policy in our district now, however, with a testing in policy with kids who have birthdays up thru a certain date in October, but from what I have heard, its a bit of a PITA. For most, I think its best to just let them go with what the schools normal policies are.

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

i think its better to wait and have the child older than younger. my kids were not really affected since their birth dates are jan, march and may. i know kids that are the youngest in their my childrens grades and i know kids that are the oldest. the majority of the children seem to excel if they are a bit older.

however there are exceptions my niece started kindgarten at 4 yrs this past september. she started reading when she was about 2 yrs 3.4 yrs. by the time she was 4yrs she was reading second grade books. she excels in violin and learning chinese. also one friend of mine her child is 7 months younger than my oldest but in the same grade but he is in gifted and talented.
overall what is the rush. your child will be in school for the next 12 yrs and more if she continues her education. enjoy her at home one more year.

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The cut-off date is in place for a reason. Wait until next school year to have her start kindergarten.

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I think missing the cut off is great! What a blessing. My daughter is Sept 16 and was not able to attend prek for the same reasons you stated above. I teach Kinder and am thrilled that my daughter will be the oldest in the class. It's not necessarily about academics now but rather social skills and decision making as she grows up. My little one was a born verbal kid and is a full blown reader at 4. Now, fast forward a dozen years when she is ready for college. She will be one year more mature when she steps out on her own. Plus, you get your little girl at home one extra year. Lots of people say they did great being the youngest in the class growing up. I am sure it's true. I was a June birthday and did just fine. But I can't help but think of this as a blessing for you rather than a problem.

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I have a now five-yr-old fall baby as well. I was certain she was ready for school and disapointed she had to wait. My husband, who was put into school too early and struggled all through school, was glad she had to wait and thinks she will have the advantage over the other kindergarteners.
Same situation with pre-K. So much of what she needs to know for kindergarten you can teach her at home (colors, numbers, letters, shapes, etc.) The place where you can really help her is with her social skills. This is the part where kids struggle the most entering school.
Can you put her in a private preschool? How about a day care co-op where she gets to play around with other kids and you give your time to pay for the time you drop her off? Other community activities she can get involved in?
The most important thing you can do for her this year is get her involved with other kids and develop her social skills!

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In Western PA, the cut off is the cut off. There are no exceptions. I wouldn't worry about her not getting into pre-k. None of our kids were in pre-k and all are doing just fine w/out it. As long as you take the time to work with her at home, and schedule a few playdates here & there with friends' children, she'll have no problems whatsoever.

1 mom found this helpful

If they will allow early admissions, then yes I would! Children learn at such a faster rate than most people realize. Some states won't allow them to enter Kindergarten even though the are just a few days past the cut off. But if they allow, I say go for it. Do not wait.

1 mom found this helpful

J. -

Only you and your husband/partner can tell if your daughter is mature enough to start school. You know your daughter.

The only advice I will give is not to underestimate the transition from being at home to being in a school environment. My daughter started Montesorri this year, and I was surprised at the "growing pains" she had just getting used to being in a social environment. My daughter is extremely outgoing, so I figured she'd love being with all the kids.

If she does not go to school, definitly make sure she is in some sort of pre-school where you drop her off and come back later.

Best of luck.

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Where I live, the cut off isn't negotiable. You are either 5 by that date, or you wait until the next year.

Let me get this straight - your daughter has NEVER been in a school setting, consistently away from you for half a day? That should make your decision very, very easy. Wait until next year when she is eligible to enroll and for this year, get her in a part-time pre-K program so she can easily transition to being away from mom and learning how to manage a school setting (sharing, taking turns, listening for story or circle time, procedure, etc.). You won't be sorry.

My daughter was Sept 3rd... also with a Sept 1st cut off. Florida does not allow for any exemptions or testing out - for my daughter would have definitely gotten in then. We had to opt for a private school. My parents paid 60%, school scholarship was 30% and I paid the rest... which was $1750!!

BUT... since this is her first educational and structure setting... I'd put her in a Daycare Pre-K instead of a School Pre-K. I don't understand why you kept her home with you so long... you really disadvantaged her to grow into a social structure.

My oldest missed it by 7 days ! He flourished starting on time where as he was emotionally too immature to start eary. I would put her in a preschool somewhere and then start her when she is supposed to start. You may regret starting her early but you never regret starting them on time.

She needs to be with kids her own age. If they have a rule it should be followed. If every mother who thought her child should be the exception to the rule got what they wanted then Kindergarten would be for 4 yr olds and not 5-6 year olds.

Kids are supposed to be 5-6 in Kindergarten, 6-7 in first grade, 7-8 in second and so on and on. That way they are 17-18 their senior year and not 16-17. Do you really want her going off to college at 17?

My son will miss the kindergarten cut-off by 12 days (which is December 2nd in California). I work in education and was hoping that he would be born after the cut-off. I am actually quite pleased that he will be the oldest in his class due to the academic and social demands of kindergarten. He will have more time to mature cognitively, emotionally, and socially. Many children that have struggled in school are on the younger side.

If I were you, I would put your daughter in the state pre-K program. If there is not room, you could enroll her in a private pre-school for a year. There is nothing wrong with being the oldest in her peer group, whereas there are many potential disadvantages that come with being the youngest in the group.

If you read back on the post histories there are tons of people who deal with the kindergarten cut off dilemma of pushed ahead or holding back.

Here's my thought - if your daughter's been home with you all this time, it'd be best to put her into SOME program. Preschool is intended to help kids adjust to being away from home...learning to get along in a group, follow new rules, listen to other adults, learn their letters and numbers, etc.

It's in your daughter's best interest to go to preschool and stop stressing about her "missing" the kindergarten cut off. It sounds to me like you've known for a long time that your daughter wouldn't make the K cut off, and you haven't gotten her into any programs before now.

I'm sorry that you missed registering her earlier for the programs offered through your school district. Maybe you should just accept the situation and find another program through the Y or a local church or private preschool so that she can make some friends and adjust to being away from you.

I realize that these other programs likely won't be "free" however if it's a financial issue for you, many do offer financial assistance or waivers when requested and if you qualify.

I don't think that you should "push" your daughter forward. You don't mention what her academic skills are, however it doesn't sound like she may be ready for K if she hasn't been too preschool (strictly based on being in a program away from you listening to a teacher/being independent/etc).

I think it depends on your daughter. There was a girl in my daughter's kindergarten class that turned 5 on the first day of school and she is a leader. A friend of mine's turned 5 a week after the first day (they did early admission) and she is doing very well. My daughter was an October birthday and we decided not to go early admission and it was probably the right decision as she is very shy and is a follower. She was still very clingy when she turned 5. If she hasn't had any nursery school, I would wait another year unless she is very out going and used to being away from you for long periods. One of the schools in our area will take kids that aren't in the 3 categories if they don't have enough enrollment in the other categories, our school will not. I think it depends on the principal (we are in MD--my son has a speech issue that would have qualified him under category 3 but they filled our school with the first 2 categories this year also). We have him in a local church preschool. It is relatively inexpensive compared to a lot of programs. One of the programs that also isn't advertised is in the local high school. Our high school has an early education program for the high school students. They teach the little ones. You would have to call your high school to see if you have one, but the parents who have used it have really loved it. Check out Baltimore's Child online to find out the listings of local nursery schools. Do it soon, because enrollment is fast approaching in January and competition is stiff.

you should find a preschool taht she can enroll in for next school year. I am sure there is a church or a someplace tath has a preschool nearby.. do you have headstart? private school nearby..

I do not think you should send her to kindergarden as the youngest child in the class. It is far better to the oldest and most mature than the youngest one in teh class. If she is the youngest she is likely to be a follower and not a leader.. she will be the last to drive a car..

It's really up to you. If you think she is mature enough to go to Kindergarten now, then I would try to get her into the early admission. I live in Maryland as well, and our neighbors little girl got into Kindergarten this current school year, and she didn't turn 5 until October 1.

Are there any Pre-School programs around. Or a daycare facility that has some of the learning aspects of a "school"? We were able to put our son in EEP (Early Education Program) in the school district that he will be attending next year for Kindergarten. He is super sharp (of course he's the only one I know of his age really....), but I just wanted him to go to for the social aspect.

If you are worried about her being shocked when she goes to school by herself with out you. I would check into some play date programs or some kind of day care facility and get her social with other kiddos her own age and see how she does. It's a step towards the next step of kindergarten.

I remember my first day of Kindergarten and I cried and cried because I didn't know how to socialize.

I was one of those kids that started K when I was 4, turned 5 shortly after the school year. School started some time in September, I turned 5 in Nov, the cut off was some date in Dec. My niece was the same way, her mom pushed to get her in early because her bday was only a few days after the cut off like yours. All I can say is don't do it! It was retched. I am very glad that all my kids fall into the will be 5 when they start and turn 6 during the school year. Emotionally and mentally it is much better for the child.

We live in MD too and the test, I've heard, is very hard to pass. We tried to get our son into pre-k in the county also and no luck. There are just too many disadvantaged children. Or if English is not their first langauge they get in too. But it's frustrating that we work hard to pay our bills and then can't take advantage of things like pre-k but people who can't afford to pay their bills but walk in with Coach purses get in. Hmm. Anyways, your daughter can do private kindergarten and then get in to first grade, that is the best way I know to get around it.

I think you should wait until next year. In the meantime, I think it's time to get her into a preschool of some sort. Just because you can't get into the one in the school system doesn't mean she can't go. Can you find a private preschool for her? There are likely lots of them around (a lot of daycare centers do a preschool curriculum at that age), so start doing your research because enrollment usually starts in the Spring. Definitely let her have a year of preschool under her belt before you start her in kinder.

I think you should wait, is a reason for this, she will be way to young compare to the other childrens and if she's never been in preschool before, this will be overwhelming for her ......if you can afford a preschool go ahead and try maybe 2 or 3 days a week and if you have financial issues you may qualify for a head start program is free and is very good, (I think is from Medicare ) I think some private childcares has this program on..like kinder care or something like this, is a franchise with a little house with red roofs (I'm sorry can't remember the name ) but you can find it on internet just put head start programs on your state..

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