Child with Behavioral Issues

Yes, your SIL and you Brother need to seek out a Developmental Pediatrician, not a therapist, and the pediatrician should have made this referal more strongly by now. It is not going to go away. Once he gets to kindergarten next year, they will evaluate him, and she will have few choices about it, a good school district will sue them if they refuse because intervention is that important, and if they can't educate that child without providing special education services, they are not going to just let it go.

I don't like to toss around diagnosis advice, but I have two kids on the autism spectrum, and I work as an educational advocate, this child needed intervention two years ago, and they are not doing him any favors by waiting to have to do something by default. The only thing they have that is free is time, and they cannot go back if they waste it.

Keep encouraging them to seek evaluation. Developmental Pediatricians can be found at every Children's Hospital.

One last thing, what ever they do, they should send this child to school on time. Waiting will only delay appropriate educational intervention for a year, and very often results in full reading failure for children with these kinds of issues.

M.

They definitely need to take him to a developmental pediatrician. There is a great one at Children's named Dr Dana Brazdziunas.

My son has Asperger's Syndrome - sounds possible that your nephew could be on the spectrum, but of course, I'm only going on what you said above, and I'm not a doctor.

Yeah, your sister in law needs to get over her denial and have him tested. Is it your brothers kid or your husband's sister? Who ever is the sibling needs to have a serious conversation with them. They are doing a disservice to him by not getting him therapy. My son has been in therapy for 2 years now, and the difference is HUGE!!!

My younger one is very advanced too. He has no autism, but the doctor said that the advanced skills area sign that he the genes, but manifested in a different way.

A developmental pediatrician or a psychologist for testing....the ped will probably just send you to the psychologist. Once the psychologist does testing and diagnoses then they will send you to a therapist and/or a psychiatrist for meds if that is appropriate. No one explains all this too you. If they had inquired with the state before he hit 3, there is free therapy that can help lessen the impact of the issues through early intervention but I know it is hard to find out about that unless you know someone that has gone through it....I didn't know about it with my older son and we didn't get an eval until he was 4 via a preschool screening from the school district. Just be aware that the school can give you a general idea of what might be going on, and possibly help with getting information about what doctors are good but they can't do a diagnosis, only help provide what is needed to educate the child (free and appropriate education). Once an eval is done if he qualifies for services they will do an IEP to decide what help is needed. Encourage your SIL to accept this. A "label" does not harm a child, it only gets him what he needs to succeed. If he gets what he needs and gets successful treatment privately what is in his file is not going to matter down the road as an adult as long as he is able to overcome his obstacles somewhat so he can function better in day to day life. My older son has ADHD and possibly Aspergers (he is young yet at 6 to diagnose this) and it has been a long road and it has only been 2 years! My son does have some of the same behaviors you mention but every child is different and there are many different characteristics that can go into different diagnoses. It is easy to think they will out grow it, some of the professionals even tell you that...to wait and see, he may outgrow it. And when you are working full time it is VERY VERY hard to have time to deal with it or even know who to go to in order to try to deal with it. I know I was working full time in a town 30 miles from where we lived....how I would have even managed to do early intervention, had I known about it, I'm not sure. But if he does qualify for services alot of school districts have early childhood preschool for kids with some special needs and this is what my older son got into and it was FABULOUS. It cost me nothing and I saw a HUGE difference in him. And if he is in a daycare center often they can bus him to the school or if the daycare is in the schools area the school can pick him up with the school bus.

The first step would be to contact insurance and see who they cover as far as a developmental ped or psychologist for testing. Often they will pay dev ped no problem, but psychologist testing has to be pre approved and you have to make sure they are in the network. Once you get some names, you can contact the school to get recommendations of who is good and also to start the eval/IEP process at the school. Then once the testing is done they should refer you to a therapist and/or psychiatrist. The child needs private care beyond what the school can do. The school will just help to make the environment better for him, and provide some services like occupational, physical, or speech therapy depending on what he needs. But he will need targeted therapy to help him with his specific diagnosis which isn't really the school's place. They just have to make sure they are providing him an appropriate education according to his needs. He also needs therapy/treatment as a whole individual based on his diagnosis to help him be successful in life overall.

It sounds like this boy would do well to be evaluated so that he can get appropriate help. And denial is a very strong impulse. I good friend of my daughter has a son like this. He's now 5, and the parents are finally accepting that they need an evaluation. He got kicked out of three schools to get them to that point, though. I doubt that there's much you can do besides express your loving concern from time to time.

Without knowing his family situation, it's hard to comment.

It sounds like a kid with a terrible family situation. No dad? Divorce? Neglectful mom? That's what I would presume.

Any way you can help him out?

A close neighbor of mine told me her 6 y/o son has "high functioning autism". She told me about his behavior and it's just like you are describing your nephew. Almost exactly. He also has Echolalia. I don't know much about any of this but I wanted you to know that he has similar signs as your nephew and that's the diagnosis.