A cool cellphone is not the reason your son is not invited over to other boys' homes. Maybe it's because he doesn't want to go to other boys' homes. His teachers say he's well liked at school, talks alot (maybe too much :-)), you say he's smart and attractive.... Could it be that he knows more about these boys than you do and just doesn't want to go to their homes? Maybe they do things or talk about things that they'd like to do and he doesn't want any part of that? Yes, kids will want what's cool, it's "keeping up with the Jones 101", but you set guidelines and limits. You can get him a cell phone that has spending limits attached, hit the magic number and off it goes. Or you can get him a phone/line attached to your cellphone plan and establish a relationship with him and the bill. Review his calls, his texting each month when the bill comes. Start with a foundation of trust, keep it by exhibiting good behavior and responsibility. My three kids all have their 'electronic leashes'. I have two in college and a high school junior. We have a shared plan. The phones were bought/added so they would always be able to contact one another, me and the house at all times. Yes, they call their friends occassionally, but there are limits, and the limits are the shared plan minutes we have. I use the phone for my business/volunteer activities as well as keeping in touch with my kids, my mom and my husband. They can get in touch with me. Our daughter, the oldest, has used more minutes each month due to her activities at college, she's involved with student government... but we have managed to stay within affordability and sanity. Why? because we talk about the money involved and where it's going to come from. Give your son a chance. First month he exceeds his limits or is irresponsible, take the phone from him and ask him to find a way to pay for the additional airtime he has consumed. You can watch who he's calling, it might give you a whole new perspective on your son. 13 is too young to have a pnone at school. If he takes one, it has to be turned off, left in his locker during the school day. Teachers don't like them in class and will confiscate any that are out and in the open. If you're involved with the phone you're out of touch in class. Your older sons are feeding you a line of stuff about their little brother being a loser, this is just big brother speak.The cellphone rules apply to high school students as well. You ought to see the box full of phones, MP3 players and other electronics that are stored at my sons high school office! Maybe it's hair and clothes that they believe set him apart. When he goes to get a haircut, do you ask him what he wants or do you set the standards? As they get older, you set the outside boundaries about appearances and they get to color within those lines, but as we all know, every picture can be unique depending on what colors and strokes are used within those lines. Those lines can be affordability (a budget for clothing), condition of clothing (neat, no rips or tears, clean), fit (no droopy drawers or walked on cuffs)..these are my lines. He can be his own person, set his own image well within any lines you give him, providing there's some room to 'color. And don't be so quick to judge the ex-spouse. Kids are known to play both ends against the middle to their advantage. Raising teenagers is difficult, it's a tug of war with their emerging independence and your need to still maintain complete control, that and they are experiencing this tumultuous change of their bodies, their hormones, their emotions. Change isn't easy for anyone. Six kids is alot of change going on all at once. Provide that stable, constant routine where they have a foundation that they can come back to, depend on to be there and the unconditional love that is needed now more than ever while they are 'under construction'. And don't ignore the fact that you are changing... time has a way of effecting our bodies, our hormones, and the choices we have available on a daily basis as parents. Enjoy these times, you have an opportunity not only to be a Mom, but to grow and establish a whole new demension to your relationships with your your emerging adult children, that being a friend as well as being their parent.