Buying a House Question - Not Mommy Related

We are in the same boat. We are staying put and saving. I'm struggling on the saving front, but there is no way I'd go back to work to buy a bigger home! I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted come dinner time. I couldn't imagine then going to a paid job!

It's nice to think about upgrading house size, but there are more costs involved and they are on going.
We (as a people) didn't always use to think this way.
Our first house was built in 1969 and still had a lot of original owners in the neighborhood.
We were a young couple and had ideas about space and family size, and talking to one of my retired neighbors I found out they raised 6 kids in a house that was identical to our own.
We are just use to having a lot more stuff (junk) that clutters up our living space and I've got to admit - our house would be PLENTY big enough when we get rid of everything we don't really need.
We're on house number 2 because my husbands job moved to another location.
Wait on buying a house and really look at down sizing the 'stuff', and I think you'll find your house is bigger than you think it is.

I stay home and we have chosen to stay in our "starter home" in order to do that. Out of the ten families in my first baby's playgroup (she's now 10), we are the only family that hasn't moved into a bigger house. Most of them have gone back to work. I am very glad I am able to stay home. I feel like we're outgrowing our home, too, but I am realizing I'm terrible at purging old things (I'm terribly sentimental about every garment and toy they've ever owned...). Our 3 bedroom house is old and once housed a family that had 7 kids. I realized that as a society, we have a lot more stuff than people ever did in the past. So rather than trying to move, I'm trying to manage our "stuff" rather than go into debt on a house we're just likely to buy more stuff to fill! But adansmama is right -- it's a very personal choice and depends on what works for you and your family.

Unless your house is falling down, in an awful neighborhood, or 600 square feet, I'd stay put. The extra space you get in a new house will not be appreciated if you're working evenings or nights and your husband during the day.

A.:

Welcome to mamapedia!!! I hope you have fun here!

Buying a home IS a mommy subject - your home is YOU. Your home is where you raise your family - that's about as mommy as you can get!!!

I would check the housing market. I would see what homes like mine are selling for - and how much equity I have in mine before I bought a bigger home. I would also talk with a banker to find out how much of a loan I would qualify for - so I know what I need to save and what I can get.

We bought a home big enough for us to grow into. We did everything on my husband's salary from the beginning. My salary when we first got married was gravy. When we had kids - it wasn't a huge financial adjustment because we had done everything on his. Yeah - losing my salary sucked for the nice vacations - but we had also built up a nice savings too.

Find out what an "upgrade" is for you. Find out what the bank will approve you for and go look at homes in that price range - then find out if you really need to save anything. You might be able to sell your current home and have enough for the upgrade. Get the details from a loan officer. You might not have to go to work. I don't know.

I don't know. When we were first married I worked part time in the evenings for a grocery store. Perfect part time job if you want to work opposite your husband's by the way. When we built our house I quit to stay home.

My ex was not a good babysitter. Pretty much someone could break in, steal every stick of furniture sans the sofa he was sitting on and the TV he was watching, and he would have never noticed. The kids could have left with the thieves, no worries. :p I figured I made about 6,000 a year and that would be what I would have to pay every year to fix everything the kids broke while he was watching them. :(

So that was my logic....

I think it really depends on a lot of factors:
- can you sell your current house without taking a loss/
- how likely is it that you will be able to find a job with convenient hours so you can earn that extra money?
- how much would this financially stretch your family? Would you be able to make it if one of you lost their jobs? Do you have emergency funds?

Personally I think it is A LOT easier and less stressful to make a small living space work for a while than constantly having to worry about how to make your mortgage payment....

that's kind of a personal question. everyone's answers are going to be based on their circumstances, not yours. myself, i would probably make it work with the current house. not because i didn't want to get a job (i already work 50 hours per week so that wouldn't be an issue for us) but because i have the "it's just stuff" mentality - buying another house and going through all that hassle would not appeal to me because i'm not one to move everytime our home gets a little cramped. i grew up most of my childhood with three (and then four) kids in a cramped three bedroom trailer. so what i'd do has nothing to do with what you'd do. you need to make a list, write it out, how you feel about it. pros and cons. how strongly you feel about not working, vs how strongly you want another house. only you can decide which you want more. good luck.

my questions would be. Do you have an emergency fund large enough to cover all expenses for 6 months should hubby get laid off. Will your pat time job be to help save the same or will utilities and upkeep be bigger. As kids get bigger the activities they do also get more expensive. .our neighbors raised 6kids in a 2bedroom 1 bath house. The parents slept on a pullout in the living room. Double bunks for the four boys, bunks for the girls. Sit down and do your complete budget together, decide what are luxuries and could easily be cut if it came to it. Every household should he run based on either the protected salary of Tge largest earner...insured,disability insured,gap of disability insured. Or if that is not protected they should be able to live in the lowest ability earner wage. So if you are a CPA and he can earn 13.00 as a fast food manager you should budget with the lowest wages so you always have Tge ability to not change your life should the high wage earner lise his job. I speak from the experience of a husband who was out if work for 2years.

It depends on soooo many factors.

Can you sell your current house? Does it need to be renovated for a sale? How long will it take to sell the house you are in? Would you be able to pay two mortgages until it does sell?

Now is a great time to buy, but not if you have two mortgages to worry about.

Will you have a smaller payment with a larger house? Have you seriously started looking to see what is out there? Would you have to keep working to pay for the new house? Would this be something you would want to keep doing?

Personally, I think if you could make your financial committment lower for a larger/or better planned house, it is worth it....if it is done smartly.

As far as a part time job.....you may like to do that regardless. :) I love working 9-10 hours outside the home. It gets me out 3 nights a week for 3 hours at a time; it gives me something to focus on that isn't my family (directly), allows me to keep my mind sharp, and feel needed in the community (I work in a Boys and Girls Club)....oh, and I have a little extra money that makes doing things much easier.

Seriously look at what there is for sale in your area. It will either excite you or make you realize how good you may already have it. :)

If your kids aren't in school yet, think about moving to a less expensive area, you might be able to have what you want with same payments.

I was in the same position after our son was born. Best decision I have ever made in my life was to stay home and not sell the house we were living in. It came to pass a year later we had a great opportunity to buy the house we wanted and rent the smaller place. I have been able to stay with my son and wow, that baby time goes fast. Kids really don't care how big your house is. I vote stay put!

It doesn't seem worth it to me... So you'd be out most nights working after your husband was gone all day working. No family time, no dinners together, your husband will work all day and then have total responsibility for the kids every night. Ugh. Doesn't seem worth it to me... And I work full time so I'm not biased that mothers shouldn't work or something.

A., ask friends and neighbors who have recently been selling or buying houses what realtors they used. Call them up and interview them. Ask them to give you a "comparable" on your home. They will look at similar homes in your area that have sold in the past year and compare them to your house. Having three different comparables is standard.

Also ask each realtor what they recommend that you do in order to upgrade. Then compare all the suggestions and do the easiest first, and decide secondly on the rest.

A good coat of paint is ALWAYS a great idea. Getting all the clutter out is imperative. Keeping your house clean and ready for showing is hard, but really important. (Easier to do if you've already cleared the clutter.)

Don't sign ANYTHING with the realtors, no matter what. You aren't ready for that yet.

Good luck!!
Dawn

I suggest staying for a few years. I worked part-time evenings and weekends. It began to take a toll on me, my marriage and family. I ended up quitting when my 2nd child was born. It does not not leave much time for family time together or time to spend with your spouse.

I would put my house on the market first and if it sold then I would buy another house. I don't think your house will sell very quickly so I would not even look.

That is the safest way to get something and not have 2 full house payments.

I'd stay put unless I could find something I could do from home during the day. I would hesitate to give up nights and weekends with my husband.
There are legitimate home businesses, babysitting, pet sitting, etc....