Breastfeed a 17 Month Old

Seventeen months is NOT too long but this is coming from someone that nurses my children until they are 3 or so. The World Health Organizations recommends breastfeeding until at least the age of two and the AAP recommends "exclusive breastfeeding for approximately the first six months and breastfeeding for the first year and beyond as long as mutually desired by mother and child." Enough is not enough if it is still something you enjoy. It will only benefit your son for as long as you continue!

My youngest will be 3 in March. She still nurses a few times a day. I simply don't tell anyone that I know won't support me. I am kind of looking for a window of opportunity to wean her but I know right now isn't the time. I certainly don't want a traumatic end to this relationship so we will continue for now.

There are a couple of websites and discussion boards for nursing moms and many of them have extended breastfeeding forums. Don't know if I can post the names here so just google.

Good luck and good job!!

After reading the other responses here I think that Denise said it best. It is a personal decision. Not one that your family (even your husband) or friends can make for you.

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I, too, say, Go, Girl!

I am mom to an only child, and knowing that when he was a baby, I nursed him til he was 2 1/2 ~

Only at nite at that point, but I caught the same flack from family members...

Hey, it was what worked for my son and for me. It certainly didn't hurt him!
He's healthy, well-adjusted and still loves to snuggle, but of course, not in front of his friends!

Gung Ho, my friend!
And p.s. I do great fundraisers with my business, if your church is in need of fundraising for anything!

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Good for you! Girl, if you're not ready to stop and your baby isn't ready don't!! I nursed our baby until she was 19 months old and I don't regret a second of it! You keep at it until you're both ready to wean and don't let ANYONE tell you otherwise! Here's a big hug to both of you!!!!!!

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My hat is off to you! I breastfed my two for 27 and 25 months and had to remind myself not to say I was "still" breastfeeding. People made me feel like a nut. Now that my kids are 7 and 3, I can see how nuts I would be if I followed everyone else's ideas about how I should parent. You are breastfeeding your baby, period. Like any other parenting decision, those who don't like it (with the exception of a spouse, of course) can do as they please with their own children. More power to you!

Hi M.,

Enjoy it as long as you can. A child is not a baby forever. Contact your local La Leche League representative for support at:

www.llli.org.

Hope this helps. D.

I'm all for it.
Do hubby etc have legit reasons for thinking you should stop??? You are still taking care of your other responsabilities right? the world isn't stopping for 15 mins or a half hour everyday while you nurse? You aren't using it as an excuse for not having sex or something? If it bothers friends and mil, i would just not do it around them. If it's that they think the baby will be spoiled or isn't acting as independent as they think he should be, maybe work to point out other ways that you do expect him to act age appropriately.
Mostly i think it's their problem and you should continue if you and son are happy. but if you want to smooth things out with family those questions would be something to think about.

I agree that it is a personal decision, but the way you handle it can be a big facter. If you just whip out your boob at any old place and try to force your child to feed when he does not really want to, it can be a bit offensive to those around you. I have a "friend" who would kneel on her knees and let her 2 year old come up and take a sip while the other kids around were playing. Needless to say this made the other kids and moms around quite uncomfortable. I'm not saying that is what you are doing, but taking the child to a more private place can put those around you at ease.

Hi M., I know it's hard, but I have to agree with your hubby...it's time to let go. Best wishes.

Hi M., It sounds like you are a wonderful and caring mother. You have three children so I'm certain that you know what is best for each of your sons. If you and your son are both comfortable nursing you should continue. Nothing should be decided by a specific number. Everyone is different. Your youngest is still very young and all he wants is to be comforted by you. This is a great foundation. If he learns that he can depend on you now, as he gets older he will always have that sense of support from you. I also have three sons and the one that nursed the least weaned right before his second birthday. Sometimes we have to let things run their course. Kids don't go off to graduate high school still nursing or in diapers. Whenever it is right to stop, you and he will know. I hope that whatever you decide that your husband will support your decision. Good luck!

Hi M.!

Doesn't sound like a problem to me. I nursed all three of my kids until around a year. I would have done longer, but I was still working at the time and with pumping, I wasn't able to keep it up. Twice a day for a 17-month-old doesn't sound excessive. I've had friends who nursed past their children's 2nd birthday. Don't let the criticism get to you! Other than your husband, it's really no one else's business. JMHO.

First, I want to say congratulations on keeping it up for so long with three children. What a wonderful gift to give your child! Second, I think the people that most often make those comments, either have never breastfed or didn't breastfeed very long. Breastfeeding taked a great deal of committment. It's a personal decision and it should be based on when either you or your son decide it's time to stop. I only have one son, and breastfed him until he was 17 months old. I really thought I would stop at 1 year but to be honest I just wasn't ready and I know how good it is for them. By 17 months we were down to just once a day in the morning and I was constantly getting those comments from my Mom mostly (she never breastfed) and wasn't sure when I would be ready to stop. But my son made that decision for me and just one morning he refused to nurse. I tried for another week every day and he just was simply done. It was very emotional for me, but I realized that I did all I could and to be honest it felt nice to have him stop on his own. I don't know how long I would've went if he hadn't stopped on his own. You need to do what feels right to you. Good luck!

M.,
I watched a special on 20/20 Saturday night that showed mothers still breastfeeding their 6&7 year old children. So I think that you don't really have anything to worry about. I think that you & you child will know when it's time. I congratulate you for being able to breastfeed at all-some moms who want to cannot.

if you are enjoying it, why stop? you may not be satisfying all of his physical needs right now, but you certainly are satisfying his inner needs. enjoy this time. go put your feet up, relax and nurse your son. :o)

Absolutely not too long! As another poster wrote, it is a personal decision, and if you do some research, you'll see how backwards views in the USA are compared to the rest of the world. Many workplaces in Europe and other places allow moms to schedule work days around their children's nursing schedules, have lactation rooms for pumping (which some employers have in the US, but not enough.

I nursed my daughter for about 17 months and was so sorry I stopped then. I had a family emergency, but what I should have done was just pump for those days instead of weaning prematurely. I weaned my daughter, instead of my daughter weaning herself. (She was down to 2-3 times a day, when I weaned her.)

My son nursed for 2 years. He weaned himself just 2 weeks before his 2nd birthday! I had been planning on 2 years, and I was bummed that I was deprived of those last 2 weeks, but it was his decision, and that was fine! :)

Good luck! Are you involved with a local Nursing Mothers' Advisory Council? They can give you supportive info (as can La Leche League), or you can pull up some stuff on the Internet, if you need to. How about your pediatrician? When we were interviewing and selecting pediatricians, we made sure to go with a practice that was supportive of breastfeeding...so maybe your pediatrician or a supportive nurse can talk to your husband?

I'm sorry that family and friends are not being supportive. Just remember you are doing what's best for your child.

Good luck!

Wow, what a great subject for discussion! It's true every person is different, every baby is different, every experience is different, but I think we can all agree that you can trust your motherly instincts that were God-given. You have already made a great decision by choosing to breastfeed your child and you sound like a caring and intelligent person and mother, so I trust that you'll know when the time is right for you both to stop. Weaning usually occurs pretty naturally with the sleepy times and morning being the last to go. You already have it down to 2 times a day. So, just reassure your family that you are letting the weaning process occur naturally and that your friends here at Mamasource say it's moving along perfectly normally! While you're enjoying nursing your last child (unless God has anything different to say about that!), your husband is just waiting to have your breasts and body all back to himself, whether he realizes it or not. He doesn't and can't fully understand the bond between mother and child. Just ask him if he thinks you've done well being a mom so far and ask him to continue to trust your mothering. And reassure him that the breastfeeding will not go on forever, so he can wait patiently and lovingly for you to do what you feel is right. Babies grow up so quickly, just cherish these moments. I enjoyed nursing my son... knowing that God had designed it so perfectly, not just for mine and his physical health, but for so much more than that- more benefits than we could even know or understand. My goal was to wean him by the time he turned 2, but, of course, I wanted it to happen as naturally as possible. I knew I didn't want to go too long with it because they start to develop long-term memories somewhere around the age of 3, and I didn't want him remembering nursing for the rest of his life (or for him to be able to say "Mother, may I please have some milk now?". As long as they're not to that point, you're probably okay!). I just wanted it to be something left in his subconscious and character where it establishes security and love. As he ate more regular foods and drinks, he nursed less and less, and we slowly got rid of the last ones to go, and it did work out for us that he weaned about a month before he turned 2. I think it's each of our own responsibility to do what we think is right for our own children.

I think the length of breast feeding is a personal decision that should be made by you, and you alone.

M.,
My first son weaned himself at 15 months and I was devistated that nursing was over. With my second son I did a very slow prolonged weaning at 27 months because I didn't want to rush it but I also needed the flexibility to not be home at bedtime which was when he still nursed, plus he was only nursing somedays so he was ready too. Good luck with it and don't let your family make the decision for you.

M.,
I think you should nurse for as long as you and your baby want to. I think it is a personal choice as to how long you nurse, and it is really nobody's business to tell you when you should stop. I have nursed all four of my babies. I stopped my first when he was 14 months, and he was not ready. He would get so upset and cry, I still feel guilty about it. I did not know any other nursing mom's, and just went by my pediatrician who said stop at 12 months. Going by that it seemed like 14 months was too long. The next two weaned themselves between 17 and 18 months. My last just turned 18 months on Sat., and she still nurses around three times a day. When she first gets up, when she is tired during the day, and yes at bedtime. These are precious times, enjoy them, and nurse for as long as you feel comfortable doing it. I have no intention of weaning my daughter any time soon, whenever she is ready. It amazes me, that if we were talking about a baby with a bottle at this age people wouldn't say anything. Good luck and do what you think is best for you and your baby, and know you are not the only one!

I'm still going with my 20 month old. It's healthy for them and you and if you are happy with the situation, then I think it's fine. It's completely a personal decision. It's not something he needs at this point, but the special time with you is definitely a good thing. I have a cousin that nursed until about 2 and a friend that is still nursing at 22 months.

I was reading what one of the mom's posted. She said she bet that the 2 mom's formula fed their babies. I breastfed and i think one year is plenty. When they move onto "people food" they get the nutrition that they need. They are plenty of other ways to bond. I may be the rare mom and get plenty of negative comments. I just feel that sometimes people continue purely to make themselves feel better. In the end, it is your choice...

Hi M.,
The length of time to breastfeed a child is such a personal issue that it's tough to give any advice on it. I know how you feel though, because I hung on to it with my last little baby--also a boy. He's such a snugglebug anyway that it was easy to continue. We (mutually) wrapped it up at 16 months because I was down to once a day and both of us seemed ready. He was much more interested in solid food and drinking from a cup like his big sister, so it seemed like a good time. I expected to be more melancholy about it, but I really wasn't. I think that's how you know it's the right time. Go with your gut and see what happens. If you want to see if he's ready at all, maybe try cutting out his least favorite of the two feedings and see what how he reacts. I substituted the last feeding (morning because it was his favorite) with lots of cuddling and reading stories because he loves that. He also had attached himself to a blankie which he finds comfort in sucking, so that probably helped too. I'm not sure that was much help, but good luck with it. It will work out fine when the time is right.

T.

My son nursed for 3 1/2 years. People can say whatever they want, but it is up to you and your son as to when you stop nursing. There is still a benefit for both of you. I suggest this site http://www.kellymom.com/.

Congratulations on nursing your son!

I think it's a personal decision. I personally thought/think anything more than a year is a little much. But it's your life, your body, your child. Make the best decision for you.

I have to admit that I chuckled when I saw Faith's and Barbara K's response. I'd bet my bottom dollar they formula fed their kids.

My sister in law is pregnant and planning not to nurse (she says she thinks it's gross). I told her thank God our ancestors didn't feel the same 'cause breastmilk is the only reason ANY of us are alive (hey, 10,000 years they didn't have Similac! lol)

You unfortuantely will have people give you an opinion what to do with YOUR breasts and YOUR child. When I nursed my son until two and a half (unusual for a teen Mom) I heard, "God, are you STILL nursing?!" I would retort, "No, my Mom hated to be woken up in the middle of the night...plus it's a long drive to Ohio". That ususally shut them up. ;)

Yesterday was the last nursing for me and my 16 month old dd. :) If you notice my other posts I'm already thinking about having another. For me, it was time...but if it wasn't I would be willing to nurse way past age two. Think of it this way...no he doesn't NEED the milk necessarily but EVERY tme you nurse you are giving him a plethora (I love that word lol) of antibodies that will benefit himn the rest of his life (may lower his risk of cancer as an adult!)

Next time they say something to you (if they are rude) ask them if you are allowed to tell THEM when to use their arm, leg, give a hug, etc. Then pick up the phone, call La Leche League and go to one of their toddler meetings and get the support you need (or call me...I'd be glad to give you my number)

Yes, savor this if he is your last...and do it as long as YOU like...if they convince you to wean before either of you are ready you will regret it for the rest of your life (and resent the hell out of them, as well). Good luck, honey...and (sorry for the cliche) you go girl!! :)

definitely too long...Even formula feed babies are weened off shortly after turning one. It is time for you to ween him off the breast milk.

I would love to be in your postion! My daughter weaned herself, and I was heartbroken. This is a very special time for you two. No, he really does not, "need" the breast milk now, but it does not hurt him. I would do what your comfortable with. Soon, he will not want to nurse, and you will trying to figure out something else to do with him during what used to be nursing time. Yeah, he is your last, but there will be plenty of moments to hold on too. Good for you for sticking it out. It is hard. I do not agree with enough is enough, because I know plenty of woman who breastfeed well beyond 2. It is a personal decision, and this is yours. If you want to start weaning him, then the first feed you take away is the morning one. Maybe have a massage time, where you rub his back to get him all stretched out....It worked for a few kids I watch during the weaning process. Let me know if you have any questions, but do what you feel is right for you.

Hi M.,

I am also still breastfeeding my 16 month-old daughter twice a day. I thought I would have stopped by now, but I am a working mom and it provides a nice bonding experience for both of us. I am surprised at myself that it has gone on this long as if you had asked me before I had my daughter I would have said I would end at 1 year. I think it is a process that evolves and both you and your son will be ready to stop when it is right for you. As several people pointed out, in most parts of the world breastfeeding goes on until 2-3 years of age so I don't think it is such a bad thing. It seems your main concern is the opinion of your family members, which is understandably important. Maybe you could ask them what specifically has changed for them to make them think it is no longer an acceptable behavior. You could let them know how you perceive it and the benefits for you and your son. Good luck.