Birthday Party for a Shy 3 Year Old Boy

Updated on January 03, 2012
S.S. asks from Bellevue, WA
11 answers

My son turns 3 at the end of the month. I would like to have a small low key party. He is a very shy /cautious boy and loves puzzles, books, cars, dinos and music. Personality -wise he is not the running- around, busy type but gets easily overwhelmed with too much going on/ too many people etc. I don't want to overwhelm him on his birthday. I am unable to come up with ideas for him for a small celebration. ANy thoughts would be more than welcome. I did read through other people's q and a's but I am still not sure how to go about this.
Thank you in advance

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So What Happened?

Moms- Thank you thank you for all your responses! Some really wonderful suggestions. Based on what I have read from responses I think I am either going to do a party with 3-4 kids at home.. or go to the science center with my son and my nephew. He does go to a small home daycare and I will plan to take some cupcakes on his birthday. He is an only child (and unfortunately will be) but hopefully he will open up as he gets older. I guess I was also trying to ease my mommy guilt at not throwing a huge party ( as seems to be the norm these days at least in my neck of the woods!). I will follow up and let you know how it goes.

Featured Answers

C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Just my opinion, but if you have a child who is easily overwhelmed and a bit shy, you will be better off planning something small (like 2 or 3 friends, or even cousins or siblings if he has any). My younger daughter was easily overwhelmed at that age, so we made pizza (an activity she loves) at home with her big sister and a cousin. She had a great time and did not melt down. We wore party hats and had cake when we were done eating pizza, and then the kiddos went off to the playroom to play for a while. It was low-key, but still a celebration, and she made it through without any meltdowns, which was the priority for us.

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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

My daughter just turned five and she has not yet had a birthday party with her school friends at home. I brought small cupcakes into her class for her birthday and even all that attention wasn't necessarily welcome - deer in headlights. The party at home is kept to just family and she says she's perfectly happy with just that. My friends know her and aren't at all offended not being invited.

At her family party she decorated her cake, opened presents, ate, balloons everywhere, we all talked/played with her toys, but the attention was spread around and the energy was familial and familiar.

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L.G.

answers from Detroit on

how about just inviting a few of his friends and planning his favorite snacks, a few games, etc. often, people plan parties that they think they should, rather than really having the kid in mind. just think about what would make him the happiest, that's really what matters. don't do a party just because you think you should.

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Does have attend daycare? I just take juice and cookies to the daycare on the birthday. Don't worry about a big party.

Another option would be Chuck E Cheese with a few friends on a weekday night. Its not as busy or loud then and you get discounts on the parties.

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T.W.

answers from Syracuse on

I would keep it simple and fun, just do a family party or invite a couple of friends. You really don't need to do a big party, especially if you think he'll be overwhelmed.

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D.S.

answers from Kansas City on

If you want to do something with a few friends, and outside of your house, how about a nature center, zoo or art party? Those aren't as overwhelming or hectic and still fun for kids that age.

I just did our 4 year old's party at our local nature center - the kids walked around the center on their own, made an owl craft that we brought with us and then sat for a special animal presentation where they got to meet 3 animals. Our zoo does the same type of party, even in the winter (the whole party is indoors). We also have a few museums and local art studios that do parties where the kids make a project. Interesting enough to hold their attention without having to be rambunctious.

Kudos to you for taking your son's personality and interests into account. Hope he enjoys his friends and his day!

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Why don't just you/Husband and your son, celebrate?
Me and many of my friends, did not have birthday "parties" for their kids at this age. Just had a family thing. With the parents.
You can get helium balloons and streamers and decorate your home, get a cake and surprise him with his presents.

That is what we did for our kids at that age.
They loved it and felt special.

Your son is not into many people being around. That is fine.
Go by his cues, right now per his age.
When older, you can then have a "party" for him.

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R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

My little guy will be turning 3 in April, and while he is not shy but very outgoing, I'm taking him, his brother, sister and my nephew to an aquarium, with cupcakes and pizza at home afterwards. I'll put up some streamers and balloons to make it look festive.

Happy 3rd to your son!!

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M.O.

answers from New York on

I swear, I asked a question with the exact same title two years ago. And, mine loved books, puzzles, and music too! I agree with all the suggestion of keeping it small. 2-3 other kids is plenty. I also like the idea of having it away from home. My son wound up being very freaked out by having other kids in his house -- I wish I'd thought of this. In other words, ditto every single suggestion Debi made -- a nature center, zoo, or art studio would be fantastic.

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W.C.

answers from Seattle on

Make it for family members or one or two friends at this age for a shy boy at this age.

Don't have a lot of noise or noise makers. Ask him if he wants balloons--sometimes they pop.

Let him choose who to invite and ask him twice.

Keep the number of presents to open minimal. Sometimes too many presents can be overwhelming to small kids.

Then have lots of puzzles to play with. Get some of those large floor puzzles--they are wonderful for boys his age. You could have the boys set up an indoor "fort" with chairs, pillows and blankets, for the boys to play in. They love them at that age. Then serve cake and ice cream in the fort. Have helmets for them to wear in the fort, belts and swords too.

C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

we do "only family" at parties, for the most part. us, my son's grandparents, aunts and uncles and cousins. he sees them constantly so he is not shy with them. it sounds to me like your son would enjoy a much smaller party more. only invite people he's close to. maybe go somewhere he'd enjoy, as a family. i would also ask his input. ask who he would like to come. if he has a couple good buddies then he might want them to come too. it should be his choice, obviously he's not the type of kiddo that would enjoy a surprise party with people he's not comfortable around.

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