Bed Time - Steamboat Springs,CO

I am in the same boat with my 2 year old. Have you tried soothing music? One day I read that someone turns down all the lights before bed time in the room that everyone is in so it creates a more soothing environment and helps them relax. We do this for a few hours before bed time. We just use a little lamp in the living room instead of the big light. Then when it's time for our little night-owl to go to bed she is a little more ready. Granted it doesn't always work, but this method has worked more than many others. Good luck to you!

Dear K.,
I agree with all of Stephanie's suggestions. We did gate the doorway so he couldn't get out and he would stay in the room and eventually go to sleep. It didn't take long for him to learn that we wouldn't come in and play and he quickly learned to stay in bed - we'd tell him he could play quietly in the bed as long as he liked, with the lights off and just the nightlight on.

2 1/2 is too young to remember that behavior at night will earn a prize in the morning. Your attention right now is much more valuable.

take care,

Trying to think about a prize he might get in the morning is too far away to care about. Kids that age live in the now. Maybe try letting him pick his prize before he goes to bed, and that if he comes out of his room it will get taken away and put in a "toy time out". He will probably LOVE the idea of getting a prize BEFORE going to bed, but loathe the idea of giving it up. It may help him stay in bed in the "now" rather than waiting. And to avoid having to give him a new prize every night, you can let him pick a special bedtime toy that has to go back in the bag in the morning. He can then choose a different one the next night. It can also work at naptime... Good luck. The other posters have also given some good advice.

Yep totally a gate in the doorway! We also used one of those door knob thingies so he couldn't open it and then once he was asleep we opened his door!

My advice to you would be to set a routine and stick to it! Consistency is the key. Always (or almost always), eat dinner close to the same time, have a warm bath, put on pajamas, read a few (2 at most) books, and then night night time. If you stick to this routine, things are predictable for your son and he knows what is expected of him within that routine. It takes some time for him to realize that this is how things are going to be, but once it's in place, it should work to your advantage (and his, really). You may already have a routine in place, but it's helpful to hear about it again.

If and when your son gets out of bed, I would very quietly (without a lot of social interaction), go in there and place him in bed once again, and then walk out. Having you do this over and over means that "play time" is over, and shows that your priority is to get him into bed versus giving into his attention getting behavior and reading to him more, or getting him a drink or whatever. (Kind of like the Super Nanny does)

I have read on this site that many moms/dads put up a gate in the child's bedroom door opening so that they can not exit their room...that may help curtail his coming downstairs too. Because the door is open, he won't feel "trapped." Could be helpful.

My only other idea is maybe to remove any toys or things that he'd want to get out of bed to play with (other than books). Perhaps giving him the message that his room is a sleeping place at that time of day could keep him from wanting to play so much. If there is nothing for him to do when he gets out of bed (except maybe look at books), he may be more inclined to stay in bed.

If he's not scared, what would happen if you didn't go into his room? How long would he stay awake in there before wearing himself out? Would he finally get so tired that he'd fall asleep on his own? He may be prolonging bedtime to spend time with you and your hubby...

Good luck - sweet dreams and good sleep to you all

I agree and understand completely. We did the baby gate, music and books. It just takes a while for them to get it. For a while my daughter would only sleep on the floor of her room, and that was fine, as long as she was in her room. All 3 of mine understand it is bed time - they don't have to sleep until they want to, but they have to stay in bed. It's hard to "end it on a bad note" but mine never seemed to think that come morning; they'd forgotten all about it. And they are too little to remember it for the rest of their lives. It just takes a little while for them to get the hang of it!