A. asks from Lakeland, FL on April 17, 2007
Baby Shower Gift
My husbands best friends wife is 8 months pregnant, and her MIL is planning her a baby shower. I have already bought about $40 worth of stuff that I have already given her (some diapers, baby soaps, a few outfits, etc), althought if she knew what she was having I'm sure that amount would be much higher! :) She had some preterm labor and got hospitalized, and they gave her a sonogram at 7.5 months and the nurse thought it was a boy, but wasn't 100% sure.
Anyhow, my question is how much does one usually spend on a baby shower gift? I would like to buy a lot of stuff for them, but we are a one income family as it is. I just wondered if there was uniform amount that usually got spent. Thanks for any help!
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S.R. answers from Burlington on April 20, 2007
It does sound like you have already "showered" her with some nice gifts. If it were me, I would buy a jumbo pack of diapers in size 1 or 2. She will appreciate having some diapers in that size once the little one outgrows the newborn size. I know it really came in handy for us. The longer you can go with out buying diapers the better, right? :)
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T.Q. answers from Orlando on April 17, 2007
A.,
For my baby shower (almost 2 years ago) I didn't expect anything from anyone. Even when I was compiling my insanely long registry at 3 different stores! I was just having fun. My parents gave me 3 large items I needed, plus every cute little thing my mom saw every time she went shopping. My sister, who is a full-time student, bought all the crib linens for me. My high school buddy, who's on a tightly budgeted income with a little one of her own, gave me an assortment of keepsakes and cute baby stuff that really came from her heart. Some family friends that I barely know sent me a high chair and a swing. My aunt sent me a $120 travel system. A lady from work gave me a fabulous $15 grooming kit. My boss's wife knit booties and her 85-year-old mother, whom I've never met, crocheted a blanket for my son. My brother's wife splurged on a designer perfume I had always wanted. My other sister-in-law gave me a gift certificate to Target that I later used on diapers (very handy).
Okay, so I have a point...there were lots of gifts and I remember each and every one. They ranged greatly in price and quality, but they all held exactly the same value to me. It was such a special time and I was so grateful to know so many people cared for me. Having great friends who care enough to worry about not spending enough on a shower gift are gift enough!
-T.
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S.B. answers from Fort Myers on April 17, 2007
How about doing things that are non monetary, more thoughtfulness. LIke coupons that she can use for your services, even housecleaning or babysitting, or laundry, etc You can take her dinner, if she refuses, ring the doorbell and leave it at the door (lol) or give a basket of bubble bath.
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J.C. answers from Daytona Beach on April 18, 2007
Every mom just appreciates what you can give them. It is not an obligation to keep paying for gifts. If you can offer your time, new moms will need the dinners for the few days back from the hospital, getting the house in order for her when she goes into labor, if she has other kids offer to watch them while she in delivery or if it is a difficult one offer to help her out when she is recouping. Those are the things make true buddies!!! Good luck, Jen
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L.D. answers from Gainesville on April 18, 2007
I usually try to keep it at $20. One thing that I've been doing lately is making hooded towels as the main present (home-made ones are tons better than the thin, flimsy ones that are sold at most major chain stores) and then adding some other store-bought items to go with it. If you are interested in that, I can try to find the link for the pattern I used.
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V. answers from Melbourne on April 18, 2007
I've been to several baby showers, and had a couple myself. I don't think anyone is all that concerned with the cost of the gift. The fact that you have gotten things all ready shouldn't keep you from a gift at a shower. Those are extras, and I have been in simular situations and would feel wierd not bringing something to the shower. As some ladies have said, it doesn't need to be an expensive gift, but it should be thoughtfull. Think about the kinds of things that would be very nice to have when the baby is around. Items of convenience, things to help with comfort, things to either ocupy or carry baby while mom and dad are busy, clothes that will be needed yet haven't been purchased, a night out alone for the parents, anything that gives some thought to what will help the baby feel comfortable, or give mom and dad more piece of mind. The last shower I went to I gave a jumbo pack of stage 2 diapers from a wholesale store because they will go through them and diapers can get pricey, I also got a combo pack of medicines and infant care stuff because it's nice to have whatever you need when the baby gets sick or hurt. I had already given an activiy blanket earlier that I had previously purchased. When I wanted one for my son I was not impressed with the prices on what I could find. After the fact I found this great activity blanket with all sorts of learning things, bold colors, and a good price, so I got it early since I knew they were having a baby and could use it to place the baby on when they don't want him on the dirty floor.
Just keep it thoughtful, and try not to buy a lot of things that everyone will buy. If you want to do something for the parents I would find out what kind of food they like and get a gift certificate, put it in a card with a note that you will watch the baby for a night so they can go out alone.
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T.F. answers from San Francisco on April 17, 2007
Sounds like you've done a lot already. You can get her a nice (inexpensive) photo album/photo box to take to the shower. You could also buy disposable cameras (at Sams or Costco) and hand them out at the shower. This way others can take pictures and your friend will have a lot of memories. you've gotten some clever ideas through this post.
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C.R. answers from Orlando on April 18, 2007
My own brother is having a baby and it will be my first niece, and still I only spent about 50$ on their gifts. I will be spoiling the child once she arrives so I do not see any need to overspend f rteh shower when the grandparents and parents will want to do most of the buying anyway! Just wait it out and see what they dont get or what they ned and if it is budgetable get it for them. I always like to get things that I liked from experience, something a bit unique that I know they will appreciate but probably didnt think of or register for (i.e. the safety feeders or the faucet cover for the bath tub) Good luck and Congrats!--C.
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A.B. answers from Tampa on April 17, 2007
it is so fun to buy baby things, isn't it?..........you have spent too much on the baby- you must love to shop. don't go seeing something and now that you have someone you can give it too, just go buy it. unless you have absolutely no money worries or problem, and your husband is making 7 figures. you see where i'm going. i know that you don't want to look cheap- i hate that. but that doesn't mean you have to spend more than you should. think about it this way with baby shower gifts: most people will buy for the baby, diapers (which some babies will be too big when they born to use the newborn), or clothes(with how many cute baby clothes and remember the first few weeks after birth- you stayed home, the baby worn gowns) by the time my kids where able to wearthe clothes we got we had out grown them. bottle (what if the mom nurses).
if the mom to be is registered somewhere that would be very helpful, but if not then you could do what i did for an employee's wife- i gave her a $50 gift card. i wasn't close to her, you are, so i'd do a gift card and take her for a manicure or a pedicure, just the 2 of you. it is more personal- or if she would rather- try buying the mom to be a night gown that is nice enough for people to see her in, while visiting baby. it's just usually at a baby shower people forget about the mom to be.
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