46 answers

What Do You Spend? - Pittsburgh,PA

If you go to a baby shower, or a wedding shower, what do you typically spend?
There was a post about a $5 baby shower gift and I was shocked at that idea!
I'm not talking about your sister, SIL, best friend, etc....just a run-of-the mill shower for a run-of-the mill (for lack of a better term) person.
The bare minimum for me, would probably be $25, then the card, then the gift wrap/bag/bows ending up at about $35 total.

What do you typically spend?

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

$5 seems a low, borderline insulting. I have a $10-$15 budget for people that I am not that close to. But I can do a lot with $15!

4 moms found this helpful

Yep, $25 is good enough.
And yep, the gift wrapping/bows/card costs a lot too!

As an aside: aren't razor blades just an outrageous cost?????
Anyway, just an aside vent.

all the best,
Susan

3 moms found this helpful

For a coworker who I am not close with, I'd say I'd throw in $5-$10 towards a group gift.

Acquaintances/friends I'm not super close with - $20.

Family/Close friends - usually $30-$50 (30 for shower, 50 for gift).

This is before the wrapping paper, bows and card.

Weddings WE are in - $75 for the wedding. (we have one in October).

3 moms found this helpful

More Answers

$5 seems a low, borderline insulting. I have a $10-$15 budget for people that I am not that close to. But I can do a lot with $15!

4 moms found this helpful

Most of my close friends are in a similar financial situation as we are and value used items. For all of the recent baby showers I've attended, I've passed on valuable second hand items. The cost: zero dollars. The item is on loan. For example, I am loaning a beautiful and sturdy bassinet to some of my friends who had a baby in December. When she grows out of it, they'll give it back.

Alternatively, we'll all pool money for a needed item.

When baby is born, I leave a care package on the parent's/mother's front porch and include pulp fiction / magazines, one or more easy to prepare/reheat meals (ex: fresh ravioli, nice sauce, salad, salad dressing, fresh / ripe fruit, a cheap bottle of sparkling wine, a few fun tokens/treasures for the older sibling...etc). Cost: 15-50 dollars depending on where we/they are at financially.

Often, if medical complications have occurred, and/or if mama's support network is lacking, I'll spend a few hours / few days with her and do laundry, dishes, cooking, burping, rocking and company.

I don't buy cards. I think they are an atrocious waste of money. I do LOVE gift wrapping and card making, but often use cloth / fancy paper / ribbon that I have saved from various sources.

4 moms found this helpful

for not well known person $15-20. For a good friend $35-$60.

3 moms found this helpful

For a coworker who I am not close with, I'd say I'd throw in $5-$10 towards a group gift.

Acquaintances/friends I'm not super close with - $20.

Family/Close friends - usually $30-$50 (30 for shower, 50 for gift).

This is before the wrapping paper, bows and card.

Weddings WE are in - $75 for the wedding. (we have one in October).

3 moms found this helpful

For a shower gift, I spend between $25-$75. Depends on who it is and what they need.

3 moms found this helpful

Co-worker ~ we all chip in $10.00 and do a combined gift off the registry
My family ~ my mom, SIL & myself chip in $15.00 and do a combined gift off the registry
DH's family ~ whatever my MIL tells me my share is....
SIL's ~ did about $80.00 for each of the 3
Good friends ~ I would say about $50.00
So-So friends ~ $15.00 - $20.00
Man I didn't realize I had so many ranges until I had to write it out : )

3 moms found this helpful

I was going to ask this!

For a run-of-the mill shower/wedding, I would spend about $50 on the gift, and then another $5-$10 on the card and bag.

For someone really close to me, $50 to $150 on up, depending on their financial status, need, MY financial status at the time, etc.

The $5 really shocked me too!

3 moms found this helpful

For a person I'm not close to about$40. Then again, in these situations, I think it is acceptable for multiple people to go into a nicer gift spending 10 -15 dollars each. I think thats a great way to lessen the burden and still get a descent gift. There was a lot of that going on with my work place baby shower and I was glad that individuals did not spend too much on me.

3 moms found this helpful

Yep, $25 is good enough.
And yep, the gift wrapping/bows/card costs a lot too!

As an aside: aren't razor blades just an outrageous cost?????
Anyway, just an aside vent.

all the best,
Susan

3 moms found this helpful

I usually get all my gift bags and bows and paper at christmas. I get white, silver, gold and red as it goes with everything. I also buy a box of mixed greeting cards when I see them on clearance. (Birthdays, and other ocasions)

I also recycle gift bags. If I got a gift bag for my birthday or what ever, I store it so I wont have to spend $4 on that.

Baby shower gift usually $20, weather it is a gift or a gift card. Nothing more.

I went a baby shower once where the mommy just wanted diapers/wipes.

You can get a cute ready made gift basket full of product for under $20 or you can make your own.

But $20 is enough.

2 moms found this helpful

I would say $15 to $20. If it's not someone I'm really close to, all you need is a cute outfit and you can go to kohls and get them pretty cheap. We are on a tight budget so I don't spend a lot on gifts. If it was a close friend or family member I might do $30

2 moms found this helpful

I saw that post.

If its a co-worker - $5 - $10 towards a group gift.
If its a friend - $10+ depending on the friend
If its family - $30+ depending on the family member.

I once through a shower for a husband/wife co-workers who were expecting twins. I was collecting for a group present, and cake / decor. I like to seperate the collections. I had a male coworker hand me $5 to go towards both collections. Personally, I do at least $10 for twins.

2 moms found this helpful

For a baby shower for an acquaintance I'd probably spend $25 to $40 and that's because I usually give them a congrats card and book to read to the baby along with a gift card to the place where they registered. When you say wedding shower do you mean a bridal shower that's for just the bride to get gifts? If so then it would range from $25-50. It would really just depend on what I saw that she might like. For a wedding present it would most likely be cash or a check of at least $100.
I haven't seen whatever the post is about spending $5, but I just hope anyone who decides to spend so little is doing that based on their own finances/budget and not that they just don't find the person or their baby to be significant or important enough to spend more. If that's the case just buy a card and leave at that or don't even by a gift.

When I was pregnant with my second baby, which was my first daughter, a friend bought some adorable baby outfits with cute sayings on them. Me and some other friends were just gushing over how adorable they were and I wanted to know where they came from so I could look for more. The friend didn't want to tell us then later told me in secret that she bought them at some kind of dollar store like Dollar General or Family Dollar (I don't remember which) and she was embarrassed because she couldn't afford anything from a pricier store. I assured her that it was nothing to be embarrassed about and that I just appreciated her being so kind as to get my little princess something from her heart.

***Edited after reading what the $5 post was about*** When I was working the cheapness of people never ceased to amaze me. It seemed that the people who wanted to give the least (such as a dollar or nothing at all) always signed their name the biggest on the group card, ate most of the food at the potluck, took cake/cupcakes home to their family or SO. The reason I know is because I was the person who always orchestrated the potlucks and group gifts. The stingy people would be the ones always trying to find out how much money had been collected so far, which to me, should make no difference to anyone who wants to give. My belief is that you give what you feel in your heart and not decide that so-and-so isn't an important enough person or decide that since $49.75 got collected you only need to give a quarter "to round it out". Lol.

2 moms found this helpful

I am pretty much like you, minimum gift of $25-$30 then add on the card, wrap, etc. This is for an acquaintance,etc

Someone closer to me (friend/relative) $50-$100 and up depending on what I am purchasing.

For birthdays such as daughter's friends, etc $30-$50 depending on how close they are. When she was younger and went to numerous parties, I spent around $20-$25

2 moms found this helpful

$10-$15 would be typical, and if it was someone like a family member or close friend, $25.00. I think we go a bit lower key around here. My mom spends only $10 but you should see how many showers and weddings she is invited to! Her fridge is pretty much wallpapered in invites, so I think she would be flat broke if she did more than that. We also live in Utah, land of many babies, lol! And couples tend to get married VERY early here, like age 22. You are considered an old maid or confirmed bachelor if you are 27 and not married. Anyway, I digress...like I said, things are just lower key here. And I do not spend much on the wrappings because it is just getting chucked in the garbage anyway. **I do try to make my gift thoughtful though. I only spent $25 on my brother who was recently married, but I got him and his wife a blank recipe book and I filled it in with all our family recipes. It took a long time to do so.

2 moms found this helpful

I'd say around $25-$35...

2 moms found this helpful

$25 is my standard for the run-of-the-mill, which would be co-workers (either me buying the gift or chipping in money for a gift), distant relatives that I don't see very often, or very casual acquaintances like wives of my husband's friends who I might not know well.

That doesn't include the wrapping, cards, etc. but I tend to get carried away with wrapping paper/gift bags. I should never be allowed to spend time in the gift wrap aisle at Hallmark without a chaperone.

2 moms found this helpful

i'm a one income household. i would spend a lot (i love to buy for babies(:), but my husband doesn't understand that. if it was a run of the mill person i would probably spend around $10-20. it's very hard to find things that don't end up costing $25 or so because of the prices of things, but it's possible. but really, if i didn't know the person well at all, i probably wouldn't go to the baby shower anyways or the wedding shower.

2 moms found this helpful

I will spend fifteen if I dont really know the person.

If it is a birthday party for a Classmate I will do a five dollar gift. Then card and gift wrap.

After the first year of school....about 19 birthdays....I was choking on how much each gift was...So, I made a deal with my hubby...we would let him go to every party he wants...but the gift is not expensive. If and when he has a BEST buddy, we will then purchase a gift that is a bit more money....only if it is someone special.

I dont go to many showers or parties. Just for the fact we dont have a ton of extra money. I will every once and awhile go to a party without a gift. It is embarrassing...if they notice...but I have not been to a party yet where they have noticed:)

Just yesterday we went to a birthday party with no gift:) I dont really know the family well. It is my FIL girlfriends daughters kid..so, just going to say hi and wish her a happy birthday was enough for us.

1 mom found this helpful

I think a $5 shower gift for a work shower is perfectly acceptable. When I was working, it seemed like there was always someone having a baby, getting married, retiring, quitting, or having a birthday. Those $5 gifts definitely added up.

For baby showers, I spent $25 - $50. More for close family members. If I don't know the person well or don't like them enough to get them a gift, I decline the shower invitation and don't get them anything :-)

1 mom found this helpful

I found this great portable diaper caddy by Munchkin in the infant section @ Target for carrying diaper changing supplies around the house, it cost around $13 and comes in colors for boys or girls. It has separate outside compartments, and now that he's over 2 I still use it, and take it as a diaper bag with me when we go out.

I love mine so much I fill them with the Target Up & Up brand of baby needs: cornstarch powder, diaper rash ointment, wipes, etc., make my own rubber-stamped card, add some colorful ribbon to the handle and spend around $25 when giving as a gift. For wedding showers it's usually something off the gift registry for about $30.

As far as a $5 gift it could be done, but I would probably go in with others to make a gift basket with various items. There may be a reason $5 was chosen, I'm sure the mom-to-be was aware of it. Possibly she had many items already, knew her friends were hurting financially, etc. A friend of mine asked simply for diapers or Target gift cards in any amount as gifts so she could choose the items she wanted herself. I respect whatever is asked.

1 mom found this helpful

My last shower for a person who was not a great friend/coworker was about $40. Good friends/family members get more.

1 mom found this helpful

I agree, usually $25 gift plus wrapping. I was also shocked by the $5, but to each their own I guess...

1 mom found this helpful

Wait, people are still getting married and having babies and such?!

If it weren't a close relative, probably about $50, unless I got lucky and there was something they'd really like for less! But what are the chances?

:)

1 mom found this helpful

Most of the showers have been for people who I consider close friends or family, so $50 minimum. I guess if it was someone who I wasn't close to, $35ish? I wouldn't give a child's birthday gift that was $5. If someone is in a really in a bad financial position then she shouldn't spend more than she can afford, but in that case, I would hope that someone would at least try to give something creative and sincere.

1 mom found this helpful

I buy something that they NEED and whatever I can afford, so if they NEED baby bottles and it costs just $5 then I spend that, and if they NEED a diaper pail and it costs $20 then I spend that as long as it is within my budget.

1 mom found this helpful

$40. More if it's a close friend or family member.

1 mom found this helpful

I guess I'd say it really depends on how close I am to the person. We have extended family on my husband's side who I don't even know or talk to these people other than family picnics. I'm happy to go in on a gift or gift card with my MIL and SIL for them - and only spend about $15.

For others, I'll spend $20 or more.

That said, I asked my mom - if I only SPEND $5 on a $25 gift am I being cheap? She said that it doesn't matter that I used a coupon or found a great deal.

Also, I have tons of gift wrap and bows stored in the basement, so I almost never have to buy stuff.

1 mom found this helpful

I try to spend $25-30 for a run-of-the-mill baby shower gift, but usually get carried away shopping for baby stuff and spend more! :)

1 mom found this helpful

I usually spend between 10 and 20 dollars. My standard baby shower gift is The Baby Whisperer book and a self swaddler, and sometimes I can get the book at the used bookstore.

My husband works for Hallmark, so we get cheaper gift wrap and stuff.

1 mom found this helpful

Around $40 out-the-door; give or take. I usually purchase a Jumbo box of diapers and a small case of wipes. Practical and I know they can use them!

1 mom found this helpful

I do about $25.00 also,unless I got a huge deal on the gift. I usually use the free wrap at babies r us or go to dollar store to get bag and card.

1 mom found this helpful

$20.00 for extended family, casual friends/coworkers. More for imediate family and close friends. Depends on what they want or what creative idea sparks my brain.

1 mom found this helpful

So like a co-worker that you know but aren't necessarily friends with outside of work?? For this type person I'd spend maybe around $15 but add a few more dollars for card/wrap/bag etc... So at most $20. I guess I'd approach this type person as more of a gesture than my closest family member or friend.

1 mom found this helpful

Usually between $10 and $20, not including wrapping and card. (for a home party) Sometimes I'm lucky and I'll find a good sale or something on clearance, I'll pay $15, but it's actually worth $25.

1 mom found this helpful

I spend about $50 - and only b/c I rarely go to these things and so when I do it is a close friend. I don't attend to many showers b/c I don't know too many run of the mill people. lol//

1 mom found this helpful

I'm in the same range as you. If I think that the recipient is a little more in "need" than the "average" shower recipient, then I'll spend a bit more for something she really needs (not just "fun" stuff).

Ooops... just saw that it wasn't just baby showers,lol.
For weddings I'll go a little higher to start. Probably $35-40. Same other conditions apply.

1 mom found this helpful

It all depends on the person and the relationship I have with them. If I find a gift that is just perfect for them, it doesn't really matter how much it is as long as it is within reason. I don't shop by price alone-- I shop by the gift that people will love the most. Some gifts are 5-10 some are 100. It just depends on what they need/want and my relationship to them.

M

1 mom found this helpful

I would say for the gift itself I end up in the $30-$50 range. Most of the showers I go to , however, are for family or close peeps, so I spend more (like $100+) and do more thoughtful things than I might for a "run of the mill" person.

We lost my very creative/crafty Mom 3 years ago (she died very suddenly) and I got alot of her part done things and extras she made. I am NOT very crafty but I have been doing my best to use what she started and some of her old things to make hand me down type heirloom little gifts for family gals then I go to my FAVE little boutique-y shop locally and get cute/unique things, along with some practical things I know they need to round out the gift.

My Artist daughter usually does the wrapping for me (she will take a plain gift bag and fancy it up somehow so its almost a gift all in itself!) and often will do a card to go with. I am very picky about things being personalized and a bit more unique, no matter who it is for (for weddings and birthdays too).

1 mom found this helpful

20 bucks is my max for someone who is a coworker or not a close friend. Friends and family who have been there through everything with me deserve to be "showered" with much more than others who I attend a shower for out of obligation, IMO. 20 bucks is fair and reasonable and it helps me stick to a budget.

1 mom found this helpful

Around $30-$40 if it's not a close friend or family.

1 mom found this helpful

Usually $20-25 and in that price that includes the bag ( if don't have any left at home.) and a card.

20 bucks, not including the wrapping or card.

$25 for showers/graduations, and $50 for weddings.

20-25 on the gift itself. I tend to buy a bunch of small things that equal out to that much. I did go to a joint baby shower O. time though where I was friends with only O. of the moms and barely knew the other O. (knew her more in passing). I spent about 15 on each of them. This is a rare occurrence though.

Before our current and much lower income situation, I never spent less than $50 on a shower gift (not incl wrapping/card/etc), but they were all family/close friends. Now, I do a ton of meal deliveries, errands and other things to help new moms. There have been 2 showers where I was ashamed to attend because I could barely afford more than a card, so I declined the invite, then made sure to deliver a home-cooked meal within 2wks of them arriving home with baby.

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