Are You Considered Part of Your Husband's Family?

We are also going on an international trip later this year, to my husbands home place and since I don't know anything about the place, I'm gladly letting them make all decisions on their own, I don't even want to be bothered with it. I do however understand how you feel because nobody likes to feel left out and you should be able to give your opinion and be heard. Apparently you are familiar with this place and you might have things in mind that you would like to do or not do beyond your limits. Let yourself be heard, this is your vacation too, you should be able to enjoy yourself. Just be ready to compromise and unfortunately when it comes to in-laws you have to do so much of that! Sucks! I know, but sooooo true. Either way, take your camera and take lots of pictures make yourself a scrapbook and leave all the bad stuff out.

K.,

Yes you should be considered part of your husband's family and shoul be asked what you think about things. When my in-laws come into town they contact me to set everything up, not their son. You may want to say something to your husband, maybe he doesn't know how you feel, have you ever mentioned it to him?

Good luck and I hope you get your say!!

K.:

Where are your husband from...?? Well, some cultures think the way they do. I'm from Guatemala and my husband is american, and I'm always considered part of his family. But some cultures, without bad intentions, just don't have the daughter/son in law as part of their family.

My humble opinion is don't take it personal, just let the trip come and go smooth and enjoy it. I see you are happily married and mom as well, don't let your in-laws way to be, affect your trip and all the many blessings you have.

Have fun.

Ev

ABSOLUTELY, I am welcomed by my in-laws and at times it seems they favor me over my hubby and same with my family with him. My husband would not even make a decision typically without discussing it with me first. We just have that respect for each other and value each others perspective. You said 'international' trip, so is this family of another cultural belief? Is it because you are female? You may be dealing with a social issue that has nothing to do with you personally; not that that would be okay with me. With my personality, this type of set up would not work for me EVER, so I am not sure how you have made it 11+ years.

Not sure this helps but thought I would let you know you are not asking too much, sounds like you are actually very easy going.

I am very much considered a part of my husband's family. My MIL even calls herself my mom & wishes I would call her mom. They consider me their daughter.

Hi K.,

I'm not sure where your husband and in-laws are from, so I agree with one of the other moms that maybe it could be a cultural thing. But my husband and his family are from Finland and they have always welcomed me and considered me a part of their family, they wouldn't have it any other way.

For the trip you are about to take, you should absolutely be included, especially if you are taking your children with you. Preparing for a long international flight with kids takes a lot of planning, plus whatever activities are being planned once you are there. You most definitely need to be in the loop and have a say of what's going on. Even if you having nothing to say, you should still be included.

-Char