Advice on Unique Situation at Work- Super Long, So Sorry!

Updated on June 23, 2012
A.M. asks from Oskaloosa, KS
4 answers

hi mamas, serious question this time that i would like some real advice on.

i am a "supervisor" or "lead" at work. i do all the normal manager duties and train all new temps, and like any "real" manager, i have a dozen or so other tasks that i do as well. however, i do not have an office, nor am i a titled "manager". when i was promoted, i was given a small raise which i was (and AM!) truly appreciative of. however. in the last two years i have taken on the duties of a total of three people, and have not gotten any additional raise. they are getting a bargain with me!

the unique position i find myself in, is that i am not really a part of the "entry level" team that i supervise, but yet, i am not a member of the "management team" either. it's at times beneficial because since my desk is amongst the hourly employees, i have a good feel for the floor, a good rapport with the staff, and am very in tune with the situations that go on out there. however, i also am on great terms with the management team and can go to lunch with the bosses without any discomfort or awkwardness.

unfortunately it is a double-edged sword. i have to constantly have my game face on - no hiding in an office for me, unlike other members of management. i can't vent to my coworkers about so-and-so getting on my nerves - i'm not management, remember? and when i go to break, i'm still 'team lead" so i have to be "in charge" and a "good example" to my team, no unloading to them. i can't even make calls about sensitive subjects because everyone in the department can hear every word i say when i'm on the phone. email isn't much better because my crew can walk by (and do frequently throughout the day) behind my back and i wouldn't even know they were there. zero privacy. it is literally like the saying "water water everywhere but not a drop to drink". i am surrounded by people, but completely alone.

SO there is this girl who has really risen to be a leader in our department. but she is still an entry level employee. long story a little longer, i got nailed for talking to her today. it has been the week from hell. i could go on for days about the stressers going on. i had emailed my boss an hour or so before, asking if she had 5 minutes to spare, and never got a response (which is very unusual for her). since we let the temps go home early (because it was very very slow) and the place was very empty, i did take 5 minutes and vented to her a bit. nothing scandalous, nothing gossipy, just letting off some steam and talking about home stuf for a few minutes. well i knew that one of the managers could see us from her office, so i tried to make it pretty quick. apparently, not quick enough, because she called my boss who came out to see for herself.

she never let me know she saw me, until i was finally called into her office an hour or so later (so almost 2 hours after i sent her the email asking for a few minutes, which i never got a reply to - not even a "yes, before you leave sometime, i'll let you know." nothing.) for our talk. i filled her in on all the issues we were having in the department - and she basically told me that worse than anything anyone else could do, what bothered her more than anything, was me talking to this girl.

i couldn't help it. all the pms, husband being laid off, work drama, etc. i cried. ugh! i was ashamed, but also i was frustrated. i don't get any kind of break from being "on" with my team, i have to constantly have my game face on and do the small talk, diplomacy, schmoozing thing (which i am NOT good at), but i'm not allowed to actually have a real conversation. if i have to be an aloof ice queen can't i at least have an office to retreat to? nope. (and there's an empty one, that the previous manager who i replaced, had used. it has sat empty for 2 years because my boss feels i am more useful "on the floor, in touch with what's going on.")

i want to state to her that i feel she was being a little harsh. i am a super hard worker, i don't text or surf the internet or stand around yapping for 20 minutes instead of working. i have paid my dues there for over 6 years, and i feel like they're saying, "oh here, take 3x more responsibility, we'll throw a couple extra bucks your way. but you're still on the bottom rung, don't you forget it!" there is another employee there who was the former managers assistant (a title she does not hold anymore) who has office keys, a printer on her desk, and a phone she only uses to call her husband. all of which she has behind a nice corner cubicle with lots of privacy. i have none of that! i don't expect life to be fair. but when life can't be fair due to things beyond our control, a little consideration would be nice. i just feel as if she is being harder on me than anyone else. maybe it's just the pms talking. i have been weepy all afternoon - i watched My Best Friend's Wedding, and Juno, and still i'm not done crying lol. i really respect and admire her and i really felt slapped in the face today. should i say something? should i suck it up? please be gentle! lol!

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

leigh, i think you totally nailed what i "should" do, as you said, in a perfect world. HR is a lost cause unfortunately. there is one HR lady and she is so "overworked" that it takes weeks to get anything out of her, and that's for important stuff like hiring temps. she constantly "loses" paperwork, we have had to re-submit countless applications because of this...it has gotten to the point where i can't even look her in the eye anymore because i just have zero respect for the job she does. so that's kind of out. but you're right. my boss has been squeezed lately because it's so slow, her superiors are now asking, "is your team being as efficient as they can be?" well NO because there's no work. we send people home early every day, but still there is an air of "NO urgency at all" on the floor...which is probably why she came down on me so hard about talking. so you're right, and thanks for the perspective.

sue, thanks also for the kind words. you are right in that things change constantly in business. even now they are talking about moving the location of our office (within the building) by august, and if/when that happens i will be able to take advantage and get myself a better location, affording a bit more privacy.

i do think i need to just accept that i can't have personal relationships on the floor anymore. it does make it more difficult since i am ON the floor, i can't do like other managers and sequester myself in an office - but if i aspire to move UPWARDS in the company, i need to act like management right?

luckily i have the weekend to regroup. i think the right thing to do is gather myself and keep my mouth shut and take her advice - and DON'T talk. i know it doesn't sound like it, but we actually have a good relationship and normally i can talk to her about anything. she's like a second mom to me :) which is why i took it so hard. but again, i love the job and the company and the people for the most part - and it is a super steady check (they love me, my job is completely secure). so i need to do what i can to maintain that and be appreciative. it supports my family, which is #1. so thank you both, ladies. i knew i wouldn't get a lot of responses since this was so long winded, so i appreciate you taking the time!

**Thanks Jane! i do appreciate the perspective - and i don't think you were harsh - i fully agree with you. i do really value my job and as i said everything else about it is great...so i will definitely be keeping my mouth shut. i sure appreciate the support everyone!

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

I would suggest that you talk to your boss and to HR and say you would like to review and revisit your job description. I would wager that the written description for your current title (there IS a written description, I hope!) is incredibly outdated considering all the duties you now do. If you have a decent HR department they should work with you and your direct boss to update your job description to reflect your real duties, and with that should come possibly a new title (even if they have to create it) and yes, more money. There are a million books out there covering things like how to write job descriptions, etc. and your HR person or department should be aware of all this. It might help if you make a detailed list of your duties as of X years ago and your current duties.

I say I "would" suggest all that. But it's a perfect-world scenario that would require not just decent HR but a supportive boss. And the fact that your boss raked you over the coals for talking to someone -- in a conversation the boss did not actually hear but only saw was taking place -- is very worrisome. Is someone over her head making HER life tough and she's got to take it out on you? Is this boss someone in whom you cannot confide or with whom you cannot be honest and direct about the fact that you are working other people's duties but not getting their pay and titles? It sounds like maybe not.

You already know that it's regrettable that you cried in front of her; I know it couldn't be helped but it was unprofessional, and means that if you want to approach her and HR about a job description review and want to get your "extra" duties formalized and PAID for, you will have to be ultra-professional, ever calm, and firm in all your dealings.

I would start putting out feelers now for a new job even if you do not end up moving. If the current firm continues to get all this work out of you for nothing -- why stay? Burnish your resume and keep it handy.

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.B.

answers from Boston on

The best advice my dad gave me (who was President of a company) is this: if you want to be considered for the next level, act like you already are at that next level. Dress like a manager, don't socialize with the level below you (hard to manage friends), start talking to the other managers like they are your peers. Act the part, live the part. See the job from the point of the view of your boss' boss and at your next review ask for responsibilities that indicate you are ready for the next level (wanting to know more about how the business is run, what financial decisions are being made, strategic info versus dynamic decisions, etc). Another thing you will need is data: how many hours a week/day do you spend making copies, filing, looking for drawings, etc. stuff an assistant could do. Then at your next review go in with this data and ask for an intern or temp of assistant. But you cannot get rid of tasks unless you show you are taking on other tasks. So my main advice would be: sit back, have some nice relaxing time this weekend, decide an approach for tracking what you do each day for about a month, tally that info, get a really good overview of the specifics of your job, and then either bring it up at review or approach a boss. But to approach someone higher up without a solution in mind will only make them see you as a whiner.
Two ways to tally tasks: 1) I print out sheets with 15 mintues time blocks for the whole day and write in what you did the last 15 minutes in single word entries (email, copying, training, meeting, etc). 2) Make a list of all your tasks and every 5 minutes look at it and put a checkmark next to what you just did. Tally the checkmarks times 5 minutes and list a total for each task every day.
The worst thing I did was get a new job when I should have spoken up to my supervisors to let them know I was being underutilized for my skills and overutilized for menial tasks. I had to start all over at the new job, which eventually turned out to be a great position.
Good luck.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.J.

answers from Seattle on

If this were IT, what you've described is normal. How it's dealt with is via promotion. NOT within the company, but another company, or another dept.

What happens is this:

Rank & File promoted to TeamLead.
TeamLead lives exactly as you have been (gathers management exp)
TeamLead gets frustrated OR just knows this is how it works... That no upper movement will happen (and if it does, it will be with lousy pay increase)
TeamLead recrafts updated resume and starts shopping
TeamLead gets new job as upper TeamLead (officed), or rank&file with a 10% pay bump.
Ex or UpperTeamlead climbs next ring at new job, starts shopping again. Takes new job w 10% raise.

That's just how software works. In MEGA companies (msoft, google, etc.) this whole process is completed in house (because different departments are as different from each other as small companies).

The timeline is like this:
3 months to ramp up
6mo - 1year to resume build on projects and get irritated
3mo to shop
Job change

This is why in IT, it's considered extreme loyalty to stay somewhere more than a year (although more than 5 years makes you almost unhireable, which is a weird jux).

Men tend to stay for 1 year
Women tend to stay for 3

IT is a series of ceilings, that one only bypasses by moving from company to company.

It's also part of the pay differential. My ex got over 80k in raises in the past 5 years, because of pay bumps every job change.

His original team partner (call her Jen) has followed the 3 year path more common to women. She's a better archetect/engineer than my ex... But she's only bumped up 30k and is 4 rungs below him in ladder climbing.

I don't know what field you're in... But if this were IT... Your next move would be clear : Job Change & Salary bump.

Don't know if this helps... Just my exp watching IT for 10 years via my ex and all his / our friends in the field.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.R.

answers from Washington DC on

I used to be a manager and I rose up through the ranks. When I became a supervisor for the first time, it was VERY hard because the people who I supervised were the ones I used to work with side by side. My situation was a little different, but I was expected to stop talking with these old co-workers unless it was work related. It was sheer hell until some of them left and new people came in. I did have my own office, but it made the other employees jealous and they would do underhanded things to jab me.

Eventually the boss I had left and I moved into her job and by then the whole dynamic had changed. Hang in there...things do change in a work situation. Just keep telling yourself that at least you have a job and you do get to go home at the end of the day to get away from all of it.

You can always start looking for another job too...

1 mom found this helpful
For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions