Does anyone out there ever wonder how badly behaved and downright rude and childish people get to a level of authority in various companies? I am wondering that right now. I have a current female boss who is simply a nightmare. This lady talks down to all of us to the point that if any of us hear our names...we all cringe because something bad is about to happen. I am an experienced and very skilled employee at my job and my boss knows this but I keep finding this lady playing ridiculous games with me and other employees that seem to sabotage or trip us up instead of making us successful. She is also a complete control freak and power hog....all of us in the department are capable of making decisions and executing plans but we are not able to do anything without this woman's direct approval. Has anyone here ever experienced a boss like this? How would you deal with a person who sometimes acts like a condescending five year old and also is a major grudge holder to the point of admitting to all of us that if we make her mad or do something she doesn't like, she will hold a grudge and you will know it! What the heck? I love my job a lot and the other people I work with. I also adore all of my clients. What advice can you give me to better handle or deal with this ridiculous boss that I have and still try to make some headway in my job? I try not to let this lady bother me and the things that I have going for me at my job but when this lady decides to act like an immature witch with authority.....it gets very hard. HELP!
Why? The Dilbert Principle: The most ineffective workers will be systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage — management.
Maybe on some level she knows she's incompetent and she acts this way out of low self esteem.
Some people are promoted by longevity and not because they should manage a flea circus. I had a boss like that.
There are a ton of articles online about how to deal with a bad boss, and almost as many books on the subject. I'd start looking around for info.
http://www.techrepublic.com/blog/10things/10-ways-to-deal...
Something I did do with my old boss is CYA. Have a meeting? Send a follow up email to confirm the tasks. Or she'd "forget". Write things down. Have witnesses. Talk to HR if she's really nasty. My old boss made several people cry and I finally got so tired of it I left. My DH is a manager and in one of his classes the guy said, "People don't quit jobs. They quit bosses." Good luck.
I had a boss that was awful! I wanted to cry every time I went to work. I am not even sure what she had against me, but it was obvious she hated me. I was not the only one who had problems with her. Several people went to HR about her. She was controlling. One day I came in to work and found her at my desk - she had just rearranged all my folders and the papers in them in the order she thought they should be in. REALLY?? Who does that?? I had them set up so that I would know where they were and when I needed to work on them. Everyone in my department hated working there. I tried to get a job in another department and I didn't get it because she told the interviewer that I was a "trouble-maker". I had never had any problems like that in any other job. How did I solve the problem? I no longer work there. Now I have the best job, with the best bosses ever!! Good luck.
By the way, AV's comment about people quitting bosses is totally true! I loved that job if it wasn't for that horrible woman.
This was years ago in retail. I was an assistant manager and the store manager (who was my immediate supervisor) was EXACTLY as you describe. I think she's one of the three people I have ever actively, physically hated in my entire life. I tolerated her for maybe a year? year and half? It was far too long, but she made it clear that she hated me on sight and she was an unapologetic bully.
Essentially I killed her with kindness and didn't let on that I was seething inside. In the meantime, I updated my resume and on a lunch break one day I went to the mall down the road to buy a gift at one of my favorite stores and discovered that they were looking to hire a manager. I did an on the spot interview right there with the store manager, who I became instant friends with. Fifteen years later and we're still friends even though I only worked there for a couple of years.
Anyway, after that interview I interviewed the next day with her regional manager and got the job. I went back to my other job and worked through until I got married and got my honeymoon. As soon as I got back from my honeymoon, I gave my notice in writing and told them I was only working until I received my next paycheck and that they were to send my last paycheck to my house with all of my unused vacation time. The day I left, I wrote a letter addressed to the regional manager laying out every single reason I was leaving: every single failure of the store manager, the district manager, and yes, the regional manager. That trio was horrible but the crappy treasure was the store manager.
Anyway. The moral of the story was that I didn't tolerate being treated like that. No job is worth it. I found a job that paid better, gave me better hours, had better coworkers, and left me far less stressed out.
People get promoted to positions because they were often good at some technical aspect of their job. I work with lots of engineers that are briliant. However, just because someone is great from a technical aspect does NOT mean that they are great at dealing with people or would be great managers.
I have found that these things tend to work themselves out. Someone like you describe doesn't usually thrive...they either move up or move out. If you like everything else about the job, you might be able to wait her out. Document EVERYTHING though....
I drink a lot! :p
She says with great pride everyone is afraid of her, god that cracks me up. She actually thinks that is a sign of a great leader! No, you are psycho and we are not sure what you will do from day to day so we stay away from you ya nut job!!!
How my boss got in power was she started here when it was a small business and since our department is separate from everyone else she has proclaimed herself management but then goes around "managing" everyone. She is allowed to do it because we haven't been forced to critically look at the effect of her "management" style. In other words she hasn't pissed off the right people yet.
At least for me it is knowing that everyone thinks she is nuts that gets me through. Okay and we usually make fun of her before she comes in in the morning. :)
The craziest thing she does is threaten to not pay people. We do payroll and everyone here knows she isn't supervised well enough. Although we know she can't legally withhold our pay she is just crazy enough to do it anyway. That is scary!
yes I am experiencing this, I"m removed enough at part time not to directly feel the wrath but the trickle down and low moral is awful.
Sorry no advice, sounds like you are doing all you should and need to just vent sometimes so you can wait her out.
How big is your company? Does it have a written policy referencing hostile work environments? Can you complain above her head? If so, then you need to let them know so they can be informed. Just because someone is a good manager, it doesn't mean they are a good manager of people. Some people don't know how to handle authority. Sounds like she would benefit from some people skill courses.
In any event, stop allowing her to treat you poorly. There are ways to stand up for yourself without being insubordinate. She is only treating you this way because you allow her to do so.
She sounds like a bully. I never allow people, boss or no boss, to talk to me any kind of way other than respectful. I choose my words wisely when speaking to them to let them know they either need to correct their tone or select better words to address me or there will be problems. I try to do this the second time they speak to me in a way that is other than respectful. I have gotten up and walked out of my bosses office saying until you can speak to me in a respectful tone I will not participate in this exchange.
As for getting the work done, I love email. Email is your friend. It is how you get the crazy boss hemmed up and bogged down while creating a paper trail for yourself. You always blind copy your personal email address so you will have these exchanges avaiable without depending on the company provided email. If you can show examples where she has cost the company in time and money this may be helpful to you in the future. Every meeting or exchange with her is documented via email for clarity. You now do nothing without her permission or guidance via email. EXAMPLE: Today we met about ABC it is my understanding you want me to do ABC by the method of 123. I am sending you this email to gain better clarity and understanding and will proceed forward after you have responded to this emai.
If she responds to the email via email you move forward. If she comes to you and says to move forward you document that via email too. Since she wants to micormanage you bury her with an email trail. Since she is controlling it really lets you off the hook if you have the proper email trail. If everyone on your team is doing just what you are about to do she will be even further buried.
You may want to brush the dust off of your resume and shop it around because perhaps your season at this job is over and it is time to move on to something bigger and better but in the meantime create a massive paper trail and don't let her stress you just transfer that stress back to her with tons of emails that say, is this what you meant, is this the process, do I understand what you are instructing me to do. I love bosses like that they tend to bury themselves when they cross my path.
