Advice on Unhappy Baby

Updated on August 17, 2006
A.F. asks from Minneapolis, MN
22 answers

I started out nursing my son who is 2 months old, But he was always crying, so we supplemented bottles, still crying, more attached to the bottle now than the boob, I just switched him to soy formula and he is still breastfed. He has never had regular bowel movements, but his doctors tell me he's just hungry. Any advice???

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So What Happened?

Thank you for the advice everyone. I am happy to say, we switched him to alimentum formula, I am actually able to enjoy my baby, He has such an awesome smile. Thank you Leonie for giving me this website:)

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I.N.

answers from Raleigh on

Try a hypoallergenic formula such as Alimentum. It smells awful, but my kids had to have it because they could not digest the proteins in regular formula. Their allergy caused them to be VERY fussy and unhappy.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.N.

answers from Minneapolis on

I remember my mother in law...well, NOW she's my ex mother in law, but I remember her telling me about putting a warm water bottle on my knee and placing my baby over this and rubbing their back. You can also do this with a warm towel from the dryer.You can feed his/her while doing this is or not. Maybe it will work?

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N.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

As an experienced mother, you know when something is "off" with your baby. Consider switching pediatricians. You need to find one who can take the time to talk to you and help you rule out medical problems as well as provide you with feeding strategies if they determine there is no medical issue. A good pediatrician will have a solution for you. The boards here are a good place to look for a recommended ped in your area.

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

This sounds exactly like my son who is now 4. I was breastfeeding and he wanted to nurse all of the time but when he did he would soon start crying and arching his back but, he would still want to nurse and he would act like he was starving when he did. When I burped him he would belch louder than my husband(it was rather comical). He also had a couple of bouts where he would spit up and it would be more like projectile vomiting. His older brother was such a happy baby and I could not figure out what I was doing wrong. The Dr.s were no help at all saying "oh he is just colicky." I was at my wits end because he was crying all of the time. I sat down at the computer one day and started searching around trying to find answers and was amazed with what I found. I have a family history of allergies, I never thought about the fact that he could be intollerent or allergic to something I was eating. Well, especially when I am breastfeeding I crave milk and cheese. I decided one day to try going with out any dairy products for a couple of days. The change in our son was immediate! My theory even got tested a couple of days later when my older son ran off to school leaving a half of a bowl of frosted flakes (my favorite!) and I thought oh I will just drain off most of the milk and eat the cereal. That night our baby screamed for an hour straight. After that I cut all dairy products out of my diet... believe me it was not easy. But, our once screaming colicky baby was now an angel. People would comment on how happy he was. We knew immediately when I would accidentaly let dairy in some form slip into my diet because he would be miserable the next day. When this did happen my pediatrician (who by now was completely in my corner) would have me give him benadryl. It was the only thing that helped.

My son was never able to tolerate soy formula or even the more expensive formulas that are suppose to be specifically for babies with allergies or intolerances. Both formulas have casein in them which is made from cows milk (unless they have changed in the last couple of years). My son was never able to have anything with casein or whey in it and they do sneek those into alot of things that you would never think of having any dairy products in them. I breastfed him until he was 16mths old. It was extremely hard but from everthing I had read he was most likely to outgrow his intolerance or allergy if it was completely cut out of his diet. I am happy to say that his favorite food is now cheese. When he was almost 2 we started letting him try a few things with dairy in them and he tolerated them well so we would then move onto something else.

Let me know if you have any questions and feel free to email me directly at ____@____.com if you need anything. Hope I was able to help. S.

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L.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi A. -- I agree with Jessica, and also have the hindsight of a majorly colicky daughter. You also mentioned that your son isn't regular with his BMs -- there is a big difference between the poops of breastfed/non- breastfed babies. Breastfed tend to go after every time they nurse and it is soft and easy to pass. Formula poops are darker and firmer and not as often. One thing I can throw out -- if dairy is a culprit (and often can be for nursing babies) cut it out for a while (totally) and see if it helps, but also some people (my kids)who react to dairy also react to soy. Soy can also be constipating in its own right. The other issue with soy formula is that soy is a plant estrogen so it isn't always the best choice for boys, infants or developing kids. (In large quaintities)
I agree, a trip to a lactation consultant could really help.... even Health Partners has a special lactation clinic in St Paul. If it is colic -- hang in there!! IT will get better!
L.

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L.

answers from Minneapolis on

I can't believe that the doc's didn't try to ask more probing questions to determine the issue. At that age my son (now 9 mo) would be so tired and hungry that he would have trouble nursing and my husband would end up giving him a bottle instead.

Another couple of issues could include allergies or acid reflux, which seem more common to me (non-professional opinion). My son is allergic to milk protein so we not only had to switch him to soy formula but I had to stop eating anything with dairy in it since I was still trying to breastfeed him as well. His symptoms included eczema, not just fussiness though.

Does your son throw up after eating? I know that is one of the sypmtopms of acid reflux.

Just trying to think of anything that might help. Sometimes just hearing other people's random stories and thoughts helped trigger something for me when I was trying to determine what our issues were for feeding, sleeping, etc.

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K.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

I had trouble breastfeeding my daughter and tried supplementing, which was a lot of work and pumping, I was so confident that my little one couldn't be hungry but I think she was. At one of her early checkups we found she had not been gaining weight she should have and that is when I started supplementing. Not sure why he might be crying. Is he tired?
Maybe let your doctor know if he is still fussing.

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A.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

I would get him checked for reflux. I know that it is very common for babies to have that and he might need to be on another kind of formula. Also, I would highly suggest the book "Happiest Baby on the Block". The techniques described in that book worked WONDERS for us whenever our son was upset and couldn't be soothed by other means.

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C.A.

answers from Minneapolis on

My DD poohed only once ever 5 days and she was totally breastfeed. It was just her body beecause she wasn't constipated. So if your son isn't having problems when he does pooh it could just be him. You'll have to keep an eye on him.

As far as Coolicky..you should try a chiropractor that specializes in children. You'd be suprised on what they can do for that. It might help the BM's as well.

I'm currently having issues with my 3 month old son and breastfeeding as well. He doesn't cry all the time but if my milk doesn't let down instantly he fights with me and we both get so frustrated that it wont let down and we both end up in tears. (him more so then me :) I think it's that he's had a bottle a few times when I was gone and likes the instant gratification it offers. I'll be looking for a lactation consultant myself on this one.

Good luck to us both :)

K.W.

answers from Milwaukee on

hi i also nursed my kids try nursing more often and if you can pump try to add some formula to the breast milk also try to talk to someone with the lalache league they were ausome with helping me

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T.Z.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi A. -

Your issue sounds just like the one I had with my oldest son (who's now 3 1/2). It turned out that when I was breast feeding, he was just "comfort sucking", so I could never really tell when he was eating or just hanging out. It seemed like he was always crying! I finally made the hard decision of going just to formula so that I could really monitor how much he was eating and it seemed like things got better. I did try to express milk, but it didn't work well for me. It will get better eventually - I promise!!! Good Luck! T.

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C.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Could have colic, my daughter did. always crying. About his BM's, could be too much iron in formula? If colic, it will go away after the 3rd month, it could also be reflux or some other problem. That was our experience with crying as well, since it didn't end at 3 months for us. Your doctor doesn't sound like he/she is very helpful....

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J.G.

answers from St. Cloud on

My son was intolerant to the milk-based and the soy-based formula. I tried nursing, but that hadn't work well either. Finally, we had gotten a certain kind of formula with protien already broken down into the simplest form. It was called Nutramegin by Enfamil. The doctor had told us about it and it was available in the stores. There are others by prescription as well, but this one worked for us.

Good Luck,
J.

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M.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

Could it be painful gas pains?

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C.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

My daughter did that too at 2 months. I think they go through huge growth spurts at that age and eat way more than usual. (she ate 10 oz. in 45 min. one night!) Breastfeeding also stopped working for me at that age.
They don't have regular bowel movements for a while. They are always changing as they grow.
I wouldn't use soy formula because it's composition is WAY different than breastmilk. I would only use it if he is lactose intolerant. (Which he would probably spit-up or throw up A LOT EVERYTIME he ate) (A LOT meaning 2 oz or more at once)
He might be fussy from switching formulas too. Try to just use one and stick with it. I like Enfamil Gentlease or Nestle (in the Orange Bottle) They are made for fussy babies.

The last thing I can think of is when he is crying, try laying him on his back and putting his knees to his chest and see if it helps. If it does, he might have gas. In that case, I would give him Mylicon drops.

Good Luck! I just went through all of this a month ago!
C.

**Let me just add one more thing! Before you take anyone's advice on here.. I would definatly call your pediatrician first since all of us are well-meaning, but none of us are Pediatricians. If you are unhappy with your Ped.. I love Dr. Mokalla at Fairview Lakes in Wyoming, MN (Not as far as it seems) Dr. Mokalla also reccommended a vitamin (you can get it at GNC)for me, that increases your milk supply. Of course now I can't remember the name. Ask them.. they might know. If not, email me at ____@____.com and I'll look it up.

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S.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi there,

Hmm, I'm not sure about the baby's doctors and what they are telling you. Is your little boy growing at a good rate? Instead of talking to those docs again, I'd first get some advice from a lactation consultant. Have you done that yet? Here's a link that lists a bunch of consultants in MN.
http://www.breastfeeding.com/directory/states/minnesota.html

Hope that helps and you find a solution quickly.
S.

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L.

answers from Minneapolis on

A.
My mom is a lactation consultant so I hear a lot of different scenarios. I wanted to suggest maybe you are eating something your baby is allergic to. My mom had a patient who's baby cried the whole first year and the mom finally figured out it was because she ate peanut butter and the baby was allergic to it through her milk. It's sounds more like digestive issues or allergies than hunger, what does your gut tell you?

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J.F.

answers from Milwaukee on

A.,

There might be having stomach pains trying to deal with the consumption of milk. Lactose intolerant? Is his weight normal and growth? What type of consistency is the bm's?

The pediatrician isn't giving you all the info. If he was hungry, did you feed him additional oz. of soymilk? Was he satified then? Increase is feeding oz. , if he cries less, then he was hungry. If it increases, then it something that doesn't deal with hunger.

hope this helps

J. F.

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J.L.

answers from Appleton on

My son and daughter also cried a lot when they were newborns. I was breastfeeding - it turns out they were milk protien intolerent - note NOT lactose intolerant. As long as I did not eat any dairy products they were happy. My experience is very similar to Sandy w's. It is worth a try cutting dairy out of your diet for 2 weeks (it can take that long for the protiens to get out of your system). Have you spoken to any lactation consultants? It is very rare for a breastfed baby not to get enough milk if they are allowed to nurse on demand.

Soy formula might not be safe for babies - it contains high levels of phytoestrogens which can cause reproductive system harm - esp. for boys. For more info see the book or online info - The Real Soy Story.

My kids outgrew this intolerance by the time they were 10 mo and 1 yr old. When I did give them formula they could tolerate Good Start - with the comfort protiens.

Good Luck!!

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J.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

I wonder how often you are nursing? When my son was 2 months he still nursed every 2 to 3 hours during the day, and at night ever 3 hours. Sometimes in the evening he would nurse every hour before bed (usually he slept 4-5 hours after this) If he has tummy troubles, breast feeding is the best thing you can do, and if you suspect he is having a dairy problem try dropping dairy from your diet.

My nephew is/was colicy, and he is a 100% breast fed baby who eats every 2 -3 hours and for the first 3 months he cried 4-5 hours a day. But, he out grew it mostly by 4 months.

I might try asking a different doctor, or seeing a lactation consultant to try to get breast feeding more established. It really is the best thing you can do for your son. Supplementing bottles only decreases your milk supply, and if he is having tummy issues it will be harder for him to digest the formula.

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B.

answers from Minneapolis on

Could be a food allergy (to milk or soy) or sounds even more like reflux... one of my babies screamed when he would breastfeed, but also couldn't get it down fast enough -- the doc explained it as a sort of reflux and/or spasm, as part of his digestive system was working super fast as the breastmilk goes though his system, since it's so pure. She'd said stick w/it and she's prescibe something if it didn't stop, but then it did after a couple weeks or so...
My cousin had the same thing happen, and her doc prescibed something for reflux and then he was fine and she took him off the medicine after a couple months.
Good luck.

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H.D.

answers from Milwaukee on

i too have a 3 mo old who is dairy intolerant. i cut all dairy products out of my diet and saw results right away. my son was so intolerant, any product containing any form of dairy would cause him to flare up. simple things like sour cream and onion chips and foods that i would have never thought would need dairy had it. read lables carefully, this was one of my mistakes. my ped told me to give my boa small ammnts of chamomile tea and acidophilius (not spelled right)mixed with breast milk. his poor tummy would do awful somersaults after any dairy i had and he was always crying. so i treated it like it was my alergy. now i have started to add a little dairy here and there and in moderation he is ok with it. try and keep nursing, it is soooo good for your baby, and as long as you are still nursing he may not give up all togeather. i heard somewhere that people who were nursed live longer etc. there is hope. i also drank the tea and took the acidophilis and my tummy was better too. i hadn't noticed how dairy had been affecting me. good luck.

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