4 Yr Old Son's Crying and blinking...nervous Twitches?

Hi.I´m a 49 year old mom of 4 and was a first grade teacher for 7 years. Ask your doctor! There´s NO stupid question in the world that pertains to your kids´health. You are his only advocate, so speak up. If your Dr. thinks you´re silly, it´s time for a new Dr.!
I had a student once who opened his mouth REALLY wide at times and it was very akward. His Mom talked to him about it and once he realized he was doing it, he stopped. Your son may be too yound for this simple solution, but you might ask him if his eyes hurt or itch. Best bet, though is ask the pediatrician. Best of luck! M.

Please take your son to your pediatrician along with the teacher's concerns. Most likely it is not a medical problem, but you should have it checked out soon before it gets worse or becomes habitual. It sounds like it could be a cry for more attention, and it's working! I am a special education teacher and have a student this year with similar actions. However, my student is 16 and has become such a behavior problem that he can no longer attend school with the others. His tics seem almost voluntary, much like your son's teacher described. He can be quite a nice young man until he is asked to do something he doesn't like. He doesn't cry anymore, but his mother is now afraid of him. Please relay my concerns to your doctor. I think my student would be much better if his mother would have had medical intervention/family counseling when this first started about 11 years ago. Good luck!

Take him to a knowledgable doctor. There are many, many things that look the same. ADHD and sleep apnea for example carry the same traits. The crying could be tied to a food allergy (dairy, my 3yr. son did this until we removed dairy).
Often times doctors try the most obvious, and fastest to fix. Do your research, there are a lot of possiblities.
I'm still in the process of investigating my boys health concerns.

J.,

What I have with both of my sons is that my oldest son could never keep his head straight. In order to look at you he had to tilt his head so far that by the time he could get good vision his head was titled almost onto his shoulder. It looked like someone who can not hear well out of one ear so would tilt their head to listen from the good ear.

I took him to the doctor thinking at first that he could not hear. where it ended up being that fact that he was not able to look straight at me when his head was straight. So it wasn't that he couldn't hear me it was the fact that his eyes fluttered until he aimes his head until the flutterness stopped.

This is called nystagmus (sp?) but it is something that can't be cured. His eye muscle isn't strong (it's not like a lazy eye) but it might take a certain tilt to stop the fluttering. Both of my sons have this. My first son did have an operation but only because of how far he had to tilt his head just to be able to get the movement steady. What they did was triggered the eye muscle by moving it over in which his head would be straight and eye not flutter keeping his head straight. But now it flutterd if he were to keep his head straight and turn his eyes to the side but now if he were to keep his head straight and look to the side, Then is when the eye fluttering would begin) But all he has to do is turn his head with him to look on the side. this way it is better that he could look at you with his head straight and no big deal if it fluttered looking sideways because all he has to do is turn his head to look sideways. This is very hard to explain.

I have 3 children (am 51 yrs old) and have another son who also has the nystagmus but also has tics (terrets) excuse the spelling;
But since his older brother has nystagmus, I was told that it is normal for another son to also have this.

So in the beginning i use to think that the movement of his eyes was the same as his brothers; however hs also did other things like his eyes twitching; He would do many odd things such as walk then turn, walk then turn like some kind of a habit he was doing.

then there were times when he would make a twitching noise (it was like a habit that he perhaps didnt realize he was doing). Some other things were perhaps jumping up and touching the top part of the door when walking into another room. this was irritating but could tell that this wasn't really for attention. I took him to a therapist for this but said that if it were to be terrets that he would be yelling out verbal things and since he wasnt cursing or shouting out things, that he was ok.

Later on I found out that not all tics are verbal. Then the main thing that caught my eye was when he started jerking his head; at first it reminded of someone who perhaps had a sore neck and was just trying to take the kink out.

This time I took him to another doctor who right away said that he has terrets. To this day; especially when he gets stressed, his neck will twitch. There is nothing bad about this only something which they learn to control. For example there is a doctor who has the eye contact problem. His eyes move vertically up and down to where my son's eyes move horizontally. The doctor adjusts his head (like tilting it up a little to help his eyes stay still) which helps the twitching stay steady.)

For my son it's too hard for him to do. So one way to dodge this is to move his head a little as he's talking to someone so it doesn't necessariy look like he's avoiding eye contact but that as he's talking to them that he's using his body more of a contact with the discussion (hard to explain since I can't show you)_

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So it can be nothing or it can be a little of this or that. I suggest that in order for you to feel at ease ask your doctor about to help eliminate the stress that is eating you up.

Don't let other comments, not even my suggestions, scare you. In order to feel comfortable, if you question something is to reach out like you are doing right now.

After raising a daughter and two sons things will always be there for a challenge; but to put your mind at ease do not hesitate to ask.

I have a 4 yr old grandson and whenever he tells me that he doesn't want to do something or wants something that he can't have I always give him a choice. I say to him, Ok you have two choices: and the choices never include what it is that he wants... i.e., he'll want something else instead of what he has like "i don't want this cookie I want that candy bar...(bad example huh!) but I say to him "ok you have two choices 1 you can go to your room (or time out) or you can have the cookie which choice do you want. When his choice has nothing to do with the candy bar only the cookie that he's allowed to have vs. time out...well 90% of the time he chooses the thing that he was allowed to have vs. time out. So perhaps not eating could be which do you want to do? Do you want to take another bite or do you want to >>>>>>>then he gets to make the decision of eating or something that he would dislike even more.

I was not a perfect mother no one is; there is no Parenting 101; I worked 40 hrs and feel guilty at times but you know doing the best that you can is what counts. Just as long as they know that you love them and that you'll always be there for them is the best they can ever have. Good luck with this J..

Mother of 3 and grandma of 4

E.
(____@____.com) i belong to this because my daughter's friend sent it to me and I think she may have gotten points????perhaps if I signed up. So I usally don't read this knowing it's for you young folks but came across this.

Have you thought about getting his vision checked? That might cause the excessive blinking and could also indirectly cause the crying and poor behavior as well. If kids can't see well, they won't be able to concentrate well, and if your little man is a sensitive one, that might cause him to cry from frustration that he can't complete his tasks.
Also I think you are right to consider that he might be acting out to get some attention. You might want to sit down with him and apologize for neglecting him (or what seems to him as neglect) and re-affirm your love and appreciation for him. This really works - especially the apologizing bit - my daughter is 5 and I've had to sit down with her a few times to explain my behavior and re-affirm her and it usually ends with her crying and both of us feeling better at the end. Kids don't always have the language tools they need to express how they are feeling and it helps them if they have your full attention and help (and patience) to get their feelings out. Otherwise it comes out in bursts of crying, disobedience, withdrawal or whatever.
Good luck and God bless,
J. B (mother of 5-yr girl and 2-yr boy, wife of 6 yrs)

Hi! I just wanted to say that it is never crazy to see a pediatrician for anything that you have found a little different or another resource like a teacher that notices something. My nephew started excessive blinking and some outbursts of behavior at about 3 1/2. My brother and sister-in-law are so thankful for taking their boy in. Since this behavior started other things have escalated for him. I'm by no means saying that anythingmore will come of your son. They thought he had allergies too at the beginning. I just felt that my brother and sister-in-law felt the same way too. Take care.

Hi J.!
I think that your son may be afraid of his teacher. Perhaps he is still too young to be in school, children develop socially at diffrent ages. Are you able to cut back on days at school or pull him out?
A class with a small number of students and a diffrent teacher may help, if you cannot pull him out.
I beleive any question you ask your pediatrition is a good question. The doctor should be there for guidance, also.
Good Luck and God Bless,
R. Anastasia

J.,

I would suggest finding a developmental pediatricain (check out a children's hospital) they are specialists in development and will sort out everything and act as a case manager for your children if they need help. Even if it is only ADHD for you older child, early comprehensive coordinated care is essential to his sucess, you will not be able to navigate the system without direction, no parent can.

It may take a while to get in, but I would take both boys and have a complete evaluation with a developmentalist (not a regular pediatrician, but they can refer you; insist on it.) By doing this, you will have all the answers you need all at one time instead of trying to peice meal it all together and you won't miss anything because you did not know to be looking.

It is hard to tell from what you have written, but you do raise some concerns that need attention, and the earlier you get to the bottom of all of it, the better. If it is nothing, you can stop wondering, and you will finally get an answer to the ADHD question. Since you have concerns about your older child, you should know that these kinds of disorders are related (be it tourettes, ADHD, or something else) and it is very, very common for more than one child in a family to have similar difficulties with different presentations.

Don't wait and see; the things that you are describing are real and are frequent early indicators of a developmental issue. I have worked for many years as an educational advocate, and you could be describing many young men that I have helped much later in thier lives. One common theme for all of them is early intervention is essential and can make all the difference in the world.

Best of luck!
M.

Not sure about the crying (you are probably right it is a response to what is going on with the older siblings) but I don't think it would be stupid at all to ask your pediatrician about the blinking. I'm a teacher and regularly see kids with mild forms of Tourette's Syndrome which often manifests itself as blinking or twitching of the eyes. For some kids the tick is only present when they are anxious or in a high stress situation which might explain why it occurs when the teacher speaks to him directly, but not when he is playing or engrossed in an activity he enjoys. I would call and talk with your pediatrician, and also talk to your son about how he is feeling at school. Last, try not to call too much attention to the blinking so he does not become self-conscious about it. Hope this helps!

If your pediatrician is any good he will never make you feel stupid.
So ask him about the blinking, by all means.