30 Weeks Pregnant, Can't Stand Very Long....

Updated on April 30, 2015
L.L. asks from North Platte, NE
14 answers

so I am 30 some weeks prego and I can hardly walk anywhere or stand for very long. Even just standing gets me out of breath, and my back aches something awful. I am trying to do dishes, which requires me to stand in one place for the most part and I can hardly do it. One Question is, am i alone in feeling this way, or has it happen to you? The other is, did your husband/father of baby understand that this was hard for you to do, or did they think you were just acting as if it was worse than it really is? Were you able to keep up on house work? Curious, cus I feel like a bad house keeper right now, cus I can't keep up with alot of the house work, anything that requires me to move around to much makes me sick, and I just can't seem to get the motivation to even get up and do any of it.

What can I do next?

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

Ah remember it well. And well, not a lot of people understood. I have a sister who seemed to run marathons while she was pregnant and I could barely move.

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F.B.

answers from New York on

Yes, but not exactly that way. For me, it was sciatica about 2 weeks into my 2nd trimester, through the start of the third trimester. I could sit and stand, but could barely walk. We went on a hospital tour, and women who were very pregnant were doing laps around me as I could barely put one foot in front of the other.

FWIW I was fit before and during the pregnancy.

As for keeping house, I would let it go, as best you can. Use paper plates, make one pot meals, eat sandwiches/ cereal/ take out, get a portable dishwasher, wash dishes when you are best able to do it.

Won't be much longer now.

EDITED TO ADD- My husband said he understood, but I don't think he really got it. Should he have long term back pain that gets in the way of daily living it might really "click."

Best,
F. B.

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D..

answers from Miami on

I worry that something is wrong. When's the last time you went in for an exam with your GYN? If the baby is lying low THIS EARLY, you could end up having a preemie.

Look, I had preterm labor at 24 weeks, and I had to go on complete bedrest in order not to lose my baby. Back then, a 24 week preemie couldn't live. Thirty weeks is a lot better, but honestly, that baby will be in the NICU for several months if you give birth now. Your first goal is to make it to 33 weeks. Your second goal is to make it to 37.

Get in to the doctor and tell him or her what is going on. A sonogram will tell the doctor where and how the baby is lying. (Breech? Face up? Sideways?) You need to know if you are already effaced and dilated, and to what degree.

You say moving around too much makes you sick. What is your blood pressure like? Your doctor needs to assess you for high blood pressure and possible pre-eclapsia. Your life could be in danger.

The important thing is that the doctor knows what is going on. Ask him or her to check you for everything. You can live with a messy house for 10 weeks. Your husband needs to step up and help. You are a vessel for this life growing inside you. It is actually like a PARASITE that is sucking everything it needs from its host - YOU. That baby is very h*** o* your body. Pregnancy treats your body as if you are walking up steps 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. THAT is how hard your body is working.

Stay off your feet as much as possible, L.. You need rest and you should have the doctor tell your husband that. Don't let him make you feel guilty - don't let yourself feel guilty. Your most important job right now is to keep yourself healthy so that you can keep that baby inside you for at least 7 more weeks. Eye on the prize, L.. Eye on the prize. You have no idea how much grief you and your husband will go through if you end up having to bring this baby too early, considering all the complications that preemies can have. A dirty house is such as small price to pay!!!

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

First of all, NO you are not the only one to feel that way.

Every pregnancy is different. I only had 1 pregnancy and I went into the pregnancy very fit and I continued an aerobics program through the hospital up until 1 week before delivery.

Even as in shape as I was, I had days of back pain and days that I just let the house go so I could feel better.

I don't know the rules about pregnancy and baths now so ask your Dr. if you can take a warm bath and maybe that will help.

Better yet, see if you can get a pregnancy massage. I did that before and after pregnancy and it was wonderful.

Best wishes to you and I hope you have a healthy delivery!

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D.B.

answers from Boston on

I had a lot of trouble because my baby carried very high up, which put pressure on the lungs. In fact, I had chest pain which my OB/GYN said was my rib cage separating from the pressure of the baby. So no, you're not the only one who feels this way.

My husband was extremely understanding - we would go for a walk and I just had a lot of trouble on the way back. He had to sort of pull me as if we were walking uphill (even though it was flat) - I was just out of energy and air.

And I said, screw the housework. It didn't all get done. Beds definitely didn't get made, and he changed sheets as needed and lifted wet laundry out of the washer and into the dryer. I folded only what I could sitting down. He did the dishes, not me.

What's the priority here? It should be a healthy baby and a healthy mom. You're carrying more weight around, you aren't sleeping, you're "bulky" and you're running out of air. Your ankles may be swollen. Your back hurts from the pressure of the baby as well as your altered stance/posture. Scale back your expectations. You are a good housekeeper, by definition, because you are creating a "house" for your baby. Don't measure your worth on someone else's expectations of a good clean house. I have a magnet on my fridge that says "dull women have immaculate homes" - if you'd like to borrow it for the duration of your pregnancy, I will send it to you!!

Priorities! What you're doing to carry this pregnancy, no one else in your home can do. Someone else can wash dishes, make beds, encourage you sit down when you feel sick. If you aren't getting the support you need, demand it. If you do too much and have to go on bed rest until 42 weeks, that's a lot worse than cutting back reasonably now. Please do it.

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M.G.

answers from Portland on

Towards the end of my pregnancies, the baby would push my organs up and I'd be short of breath. That happened with all of them. I'm guessing your baby is just in an awkward position - get them to check next time you're in.

I was also very fatigued. Some of that is normal, but if you have low iron or hemoglobin, get them to check (simple blood check).

I always do housework early on in the day. Let anything non essential go until the weekend when your husband can help you out.

My health (and the baby's) was always more important than dusting.

My husband was very sympathetic .. he always said he couldn't do what we women do, especially that last trimester.

Good luck :) Definitely bring this up to your doctor when you see them next, and if it gets worse, call and get in sooner.

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

I worked full time in an animal hospital and had pets at home while pregnant. It was hard, and I hurt constantly, but I had no choice but to keep going because I had no partner to take up the slack. Your husband needs to step up his game and pitch in around the house. Let him strap a bowling ball to his belly and see how much he feels like washing dishes, scrubbing toilets, and sweeping floors.

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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

I always kept up my house. Yes, there was more pressure. Yes, my feet would swell, but I bought expensive support hose and hubby would rub my feet to bring down swelling every night. I also would remind myself that labor is like a marathon: to do it successfully, you need to be in shape.

I did my stuff early in the day, and when hubby was around, I'd ask him to carry the laundry up the stairs.

I had terrible back pain, and labor, with my first. I had a variety of ailments with my other two pregnancies. It wasn't fun at all.

Hang in there. In a few weeks you will get more motivation. The nesting instinct will give you bursts of energy. Use them wisely.

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C.V.

answers from Columbia on

Not to be rude, but were you in poor physical condition prior to becoming pregnant? I would say that it's not normal not to be able to stand without becoming short of breath or causing pain.

I'm sure that you're not alone in this, though I cannot say that it is what I personally experienced. I was active until I delivered both of my boys. I would encourage you to look into buying a belly band, which can help take some of the pressure off your pelvis and back, and if you aren't in good physical condition, I'd suggest that you do walk while wearing the belly band and work on getting into better shape so that labor and delivery won't be so h*** o* you.

Best of luck!

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T.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

great question to bring up with your ob.
with my first it was around 100 degrees daily from 32 wks till after delivery.. and i was tired often. i could do dishes well enough but for cooking dinner i had to pull a stool up to the stove and sit on it while cooking. (i also used the stool for dishwashing and it made it easier. my house was super tiny though so keeping 500 sp ft neat enough was not super hard.
i did the same with my second but it was not as bad since that baby was a march delivery and no where near as hot.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Time to get some paper plates so you have fewer dishes to wash!
My husband was great!
He helped with everything before and after our sons birth.

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S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

i was HUGE with both my babies, so yeah, my back hurt. not to this degree, though. i did still work and do housework and even rode my horse. i just had to rest more. i could do the dishes, but then i'd need to sit.
i think there's a lot of luck involved with that.
i did keep up with the housework to some degree, but then, i've never been a white-glover. and my husband helped a lot. i'd have been pretty pissed if he assumed that i was faking misery while carrying his baby.
khairete
S.

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S.H.

answers from Richland on

Im 30 weeks as well and i feel the same way! Being on my feet to long kills me, they start to swell and my back aches and I've been having s ton of pelvic pain as well. Ive been doing as much as i feel comfortable doing and letting a lot of stuff go. My childs father thinks i exaggerate and will mock me, they just dont get it lol. ....just don't push yourself be mindful of your body and baby.

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M.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I had terrible back pain starting at 25 weeks with both my pregnancies. Opposite of you, it bothered me most when sitting. I go to a lot of meetings and seminars for my work, and I spend a lot of time standing and pacing at the back of seminar rooms to relieve my back pain. And, anyone with chronic pain will tell you that chronic pain is exhausting, so I was also pretty worn out just making it through the day sometimes.

As for how sympathestic husbands are to this, well... My husband is a great guy and tried hard to be supportive during pregnancy, but no, he didn't really 'get it'.

One thing that really really helped me: get to a pool if you can find one. Your belly kind-of floats in the water. It takes all the pressure off of your back and feels so good. I took water aerobics during pregnancy to keep active. But even if you don't want to do that, just standing in the water or doing a little floating may help.

ETA: And, I was in great shape before my 1st pregnancy, was a regular gym goer, and I still had terrible back pain. It just depends how you carry the baby.

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